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From where he sat on the ground, Theo silently stared up at Torin's face. Sometimes, he wondered if Torin was comfortable talking about his rejection and humiliation or if discussing it made him ache inside. It confused him, really, because he knew that anyone else in Torin's shoes would avoid the topic entirely instead of confronting it as openly as Torin did.
"My king," he began, respectfully as always with his head lowered, "do you still think about it often—about… that day, I mean?" Torin hesitated for a moment and then nodded slowly. "Why don't you stop? I know it hurts you inside, so why not try to avoid thinking about it?"
Torin's eyes narrowed, and with a face filled with mirth, he leaned down towards Theodore until their faces were only inches apart. Theo didn't move back—protocol be damned, he just wanted an answer from Torin. "Well, I don't have much of a choice since you won't stop calling me 'my king' and 'your majesty' every time you see me. If you stop that, maybe I can stop thinking about that day too."
Theo finally lowered his head and avoided Torin's gaze. Maybe he was at fault too, but like Torin, what choice did he have? He would rather die than stop seeing and addressing Torin as his king. "Unfortunately, Your Majesty, I can't stop doing that. I don't care what those broken orbs think—all I know is that they don't see my heart, and I still very much see you as king. To me, you still have a crown on your head, a throne to sit on, and a people to watch over."
Torin chuckled and slowly leaned back to his original position. He watched Theo with a smile before shaking his head. He really had no words for this man. "Well, it would be great if everyone thought like you, no?"
Theo pursed his lips, knowing that Torin was being unserious as he often was since losing the throne. People who weren't close to him wouldn't notice it, but Torin had lost interest in everything he once loved. There was nothing, no one he loved or lived for. He had no desire for anything except food, and his life had become divided into two: a life in his bedroom, and a life with the ministers and elders in the throne room, where he was mocked and insulted.
Theo had nothing in his heart but pity for his king, but there was nothing he could do to help him. He was just a common guard, used to watching Torin stare into space and ignore the world. Just like now, in this garden, where he was staring at the sky with the wind as his only companion.
"Do you feel lonely, Your Majesty?"
Torin looked down at Theo in amusement, mischief written all over his face, and spread out his hands. "Yes, Theo. Sometimes, I get so lonely that I need a hug. Would you hug me?"
Torin was having a good time playing with his guard, but Theo didn't seem to find the joke in his words. To Theo, everything that came out of Torin's mouth was to be taken with utmost seriousness. "Unfortunately, Your Majesty, that would be an abominable act, and I would be cursed by our ancestors if I hugged a king and stained him with my filthiness."
At this point, Torin wasn't sure if he should laugh or cry. He wanted to laugh at Theo's gullibility and naivety, but at the same time, he wanted to cry because he couldn't understand how one man could be this shallow-minded.
"I suggest you find a wife or a concubine. She could be your companion, and you wouldn't have to be so alone, and I wouldn't have to worry about you staying out late in the cold…"
"Enough, Theo," Torin cut him off sharply, coldly. "My first wife killed herself the day the throne rejected me and the elders declared me cursed. Do you really think I would make another woman go through the same fate?"
"But…"
"I said enough!" Torin yelled, his previous calmness replaced by anger. He glared at Theo, but when he realized how much emotion he was letting out, he sighed and looked up at the sky, getting lost in the stars once more.
Theodore dared not speak again and kept his lips tightly shut. He understood where Torin's reluctance to find a woman came from, but Theo only wished the best for him. "I am deeply sorry, Your Majesty."
From the corner of his eye, Torin glanced at Theo and saw that his guard had his head lowered and his back hunched, looking like a drenched dog. His shoulders rose and fell as he inhaled and exhaled deeply, and then he stood up. "I am going to bed now. Don't stay out late."
Without raising his head or daring to meet Torin's eyes, Theo nodded and bowed deeply, even as he sat. "As you wish, Your Majesty."
The night's silence was broken by the sound of Torin's boots hitting the paved garden path as he made his way to his room. The silence returned as a strong wind blew, and that was when Theo finally raised his head. When he turned to look, Torin had disappeared.
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