"Welcome back, Kaya."
"Y-Yeah. I'm home."
After going out alone for the first time in a while, I returned home to find my sister waiting for me as if she had been expecting it. For some reason, I felt an inexplicable pressure from her.
"Did anything happen while I was away?"
"No, nothing in particular."
"I-I see. Well, that's good. Anyway, shall we have lunch? I'm getting a bit hungry."
"Sure, I'll prepare it right away."
With that, my sister disappeared into the kitchen. The tense atmosphere eased, and I let out a sigh of relief. I wondered if she was angry because I left her alone yesterday and today. Her voice seemed a bit lower than usual, and her gaze was sharper. But I hoped she would forgive me because I felt it was something I needed to do—to have a chance to confront my own feelings.
I ate the sandwiches my sister prepared. Somehow, what she made always tasted better. Even though I try my best every day, it felt like the gap between our skills wasn't closing at all. At the very least, I wanted to be useful by doing the dishes, so I started washing them. My sister didn't go back to her room but instead watched me intently while sipping tea.
She remained silent until I finished washing the dishes, and then, without a word, sat back down. Taking this as an opportunity, I sat across from her. However, not knowing how to start the conversation, I stayed silent. Eventually, my sister broke the silence.
"Thank you for washing the dishes. You always help me."
"No, thank you for everything you do."
The conversation quickly stalled. It was so awkward that I wondered how we usually talked to each other. The air grew heavier and heavier.
"U-Um!"
"There's no need to be so nervous. What's on your mind?"
Trying to dispel the tension, my voice cracked. My sister lowered her tone and spoke slowly, calming me down. Her usual composed demeanor helped me regain my composure.
"Um, well... someone confessed to you during the sports festival, right?"
"Yes, they did."
I was a little taken aback by how quickly she answered. I thought she might be more evasive since she hadn't mentioned it before. Feeling a bit anxious about her quick response, I cautiously continued.
"D-Did you give them an answer?"
"Of course, I turned them down. Did you think I accepted? Are you going to say that I've been acting strange because of it?"
"B-But you didn't say anything! I thought there was something you couldn't tell me."
Relieved by her answer, I quickly found myself on the defensive when she questioned me. I never really thought she would date someone else, but when she didn't say anything, I began to worry that there was something she couldn't tell me.
"Sigh—Kaya, think about it. I didn't know you were aware that I was confessed to. So, there was no reason for me to tell you that I rejected someone, right?"
I remember Shinobu-san saying something similar. If I had thought it through, I might have realized it too. I was probably just shaken after overhearing the confession.
"You're right. I'm sorry. I got all worked up over nothing."
I lowered my head in guilt. I'm sure my sister never has such doubts. She's always confident and doesn't feel insecure, unlike me. As I was thinking this, I missed what my sister said next.
"As expected... it's not conveyed..."
"Huh? What did you say?"
I quickly looked up and asked, but she didn't respond.
"It's nothing. So, is there something else you wanted to talk about? What were you thinking about when you left me alone yesterday and today?"
"Yeah... I was thinking about our future relationship. I was trying to figure out what I want for us."
"And? Did you come to a conclusion?"
"No. Well, yes and no. I realized that I don't really know yet."
"I see."
My sister looked at me, slightly—or rather, quite—disappointed, so I hurried to explain further.
"No, I mean, it's not that. It's just that I can't imagine a future without you. But at the same time, it feels like something would be off if things just stayed the same. Yet, I couldn't think of any other possibilities. Besides, this isn't something I should decide on my own. We said we'd discuss things together, but I ended up bottling it up again, and now we're in this situation."
After I said all that, my sister took a few seconds to think before asking, "So you didn't feel even a little like you wanted to be apart?"
"I never thought that for a moment. If anything, I was more afraid that you'd leave me."
"I see."
With that, my sister fell silent. She seemed somewhat disappointed, but maybe I was just imagining it.
After that, we talked about our future, but in the end, we decided to put things on hold until I had a clearer answer. My sister said she already had her answer but would wait until I came to my own conclusion. She refused to tell me her answer, saying she didn't want to influence my thoughts.
We decided that since we still had a lot of time together, there was no rush to come to a conclusion right away. With that, today's discussion came to an end. And as I continued to ponder over it, we returned to our usual routine.