Interlude 1
A joke, An avenger and A lunatic
Jonos Arryn, was nearing the end of his plans.
He prepared this for years. The men of the Vale had suffered too long under the tyrrany of Sisterfucking Dragonlords. His brother and mother had to the eternal shame of their house, bent the knee to Aegon, the blasphemer, who not only fucked his sisters, but had taken of them to wives.
And rather than resist him, the faith had bent over backwards and taken it in the ass. Clearly, the Vale had made the right decision when they had agreed to submit to the authority of the Starry Sept.
They had all been piss afraid of Aegon and the black Dread.
Now, however, the age Aegon was over. The Conqueror was dead and gone, and in his place, stood an Indecisive weak king, with a smaller, younger Dragon. If the Valemen were to regain their old freedom, and be free of the Dragonlords, they had to act now. The opportunity would never be better.
His little company of 50 men, was a colorful one. Some were his friends and companions, other like minded knights and younger noble sons and some of less moral character just hated that all their taxes went out of the Vale, rather than to the Eyrie as it should. Instead all the way to King's Landing to feed the Targaryens monstrosity of a city.
That would end today though.
His brother had already gotten work that they were planning through the mountains, and that they would make a stop by the Eyrie. And they would make a stop. And a declaration.
There would be no king in the nation, but the King of Mountain and Vale.
One day more, then they would reach their destiny.
---
Gargon Qoherys, Lord of Harrenhal, read the numbers of taxes, again and again. He had never had a head numbers and counting coin, hence why he always had employed a steward to do it for him.
Tom had dissapeared however, along with his wife and children. He wasn't quite sure where they had gone, but his guards had sworn they had not left through the gates, which meant they had to still be in Harrenhal.
No amount of searching had found them though.
So here he was trying to hammer these numbers out. He had been at it for days, trying to figure out how much exactly he had gotten from his lands this year, in preparation for the King's tax collectors.
He had put a lot of energy into it too. So much that he had chosen to just let some peasants get married without invoking his rights. It was shame, but he did not have the time to ride anywhere at the moment.
He was still doing that when one of his men at arms burst into his chamber. He scowled at this unannounced entrance.
"What?" He asked in a grouchy voice.
The man responded by punching him in the face.
---
A while later he was thrown down on the grounds of the Godswood, bound in tight ropes and still bleeding from his shattered nose.
Around was a ton of people, his men at arms, tom and his family, others of his servants. None of his knights though. Had they all been killed?
The man in charge was a tall man, with long and flowing red hair a rugged beard. He wore a surcoat with a symbol Gargen had only seen in history books. The intricate pattern of house Hoare.
The man stepped up to him and looked him over with a hard cold look.
"So, you are Gargen "the Guest" . You're as fat as the stories say "Guest"."
"Ann whe are yew supposd to be?" He asked, speaking through the bitter pain.
The man smiled. Not a cheerful smile, the kind that belonged on a man who was about to get sweet vengeance.
"I am Harren of House Hoare. Though the smallfolk calls me The Red."
So, he was full of shit then. Or maybe his father had been a bastard and he simply didn't care about being illegitimate.
"Soon, they will know me as Harren the Second, the first riverlander king in over a thousand years."
Gargen actually laughed. Through the pain he laughed, and he only stopped when one of the men at his side hit him in the gut.
"And as my first act as king, i shall pass judgement on a tyrant."
"Gargen Qoherys, you have forced yourself on thousands of women all across your domains, no matter what their status in life was, you would come to their wedding feasts, and in what should have been the happiest moment of their lives, you forced yourself on the brides, despoiling them, and leaving behind hundreds of bastards in your wake."
He motioned to Tom and his family as he continued.
"But your depravity doesn't end just with you invoking the barbaric practice of the First Night, as you've forced yourself on the family of your own servants, on their wives, their children, their mothers."
He paused for a second.
"Now tell me, "Lord" Gargen. Before i render judgement, do you have any pitiful defence you would like to raise in your own defence?"
"Aenyes well nod stend fur thes Bastred! Hell burn ya like hes father burned tha black."
"If i were foolish enough to stay in this castle mayhaps. Now then… for judgement."
"Gargen Qoherys, i sentence you to castration and to have your manhood feed to the dogs, as you bleed to death."
A man with a knife stepped forward.
The screams went on for a while. Then they stopped.
---
Lodos, the Twicedrowned stood at the rock, overseeing his faithful, those who had come to hear his holy word.
He had washed up on the shore some months ago, and though he had taken some time to recall, he knew now who he was. He was Lodos, son of the drowned god himself, finally come home after his long council with his father.
He did not recall much of that time, but he did recall the three headed dragon dying. That was the signal, the proof that a new age was dawning, and now, when the accursed dragon was dead, it was once again time to take up arms, and throw the hated followers of the false star back into the sea.
The drowned men would once again rule as they were meant to do, and the ironmen would raid as god had created them to do. From north to south and eastwards, their longships would once again be feared.
With their shackles broken, they would reave and rape as they were meant to do.
Now he only had to first rally his people and they would see Gods will done.