Crime…?
It was a topic far heavier than anticipated, something that transcended imagination.
"I… am guilty. I… I committed a… crime…"
— Theft.
The Ichinose family was a single-parent household with only a mother and a younger sister. Though their financial situation was modest, it was not marked by misfortune. They had a strong and resilient mother who, while working tirelessly, also managed to raise her two daughters with the hope that they would live happy lives.
In pursuit of this, Ichinose threw herself into her studies, hoping to ease her mother's burden with a scholarship. Her younger sister was exceptionally well-behaved, never asking for anything or going out to play with friends, enduring hardships silently.
But no matter how much one endures, there is always a limit.
As her sister's birthday approached, the young girl in her first year of middle school had her heart set on a coveted item—a hairpin used by her favorite star. Their strong yet gentle mother, to fulfill her daughter's small wish, pushed herself to the brink by taking on extra shifts at work.
The result was devastating: her health broke down, and she ended up in the hospital.
"Even now… even now, I remember it as if it happened yesterday, lying on that hospital bed…"
Ichinose's voice began to tremble with the onset of tears.
"Mom was crying and apologizing to my sister, and… in response to such a mother, my sister unleashed all her anger and frustration. She cried and shouted for the longed-for hairpin… I don't think I'll ever forget the look on her face at that moment."
"Uh…" Judging from his impressions from their conversation two days ago, Hikigaya couldn't have imagined Ichinose's sister acting in such a way.
Yet, it wasn't entirely unbelievable.
After all, she was just a first-year middle school student, and even adults can collapse in an instant.
"I couldn't bring myself to scold her… It was the only time she ever asked for something so desperately." Ichinose continued, "As her older sister… I wanted to see my sister's smile again. I had to make things right… That's what I was thinking, so after school on her birthday, I went to the department store."
What happened next was almost predictable.
"At that time, my feelings must have been shrouded in darkness... But what's the big deal? Just once, doing something wrong for my sister isn't such a big deal. After all, there are so many people in this world who do wrong. I'm not the only one. We've been enduring up to now; we don't need to be blamed. Even if I did this, I'd be forgiven... I kept justifying it in my mind, and then I stole the hairpin my sister had always wanted."
At this point, Ichinose instinctively clutched the hairpin her sister had given her.
It seemed to be the same model from that time, which explained why her emotions had suddenly broken down.
If it had ended there, it might have been a form of solace for Ichinose; at least the burden of that darkness was hers alone to bear.
But the subsequent events were something Hikigaya could not have anticipated.
"I brought the hairpin home without anyone noticing and gave it to my sister, who was feeling down. Because it was stolen, I didn't wrap it, and it was quite crude as a gift. Yet, my sister was very happy... Seeing her smile, I felt my guilt ease for a moment, but it was wrong... Later, I told her to keep the gift a secret, but she wore it when she went to see our mother."
Ichinose let out a self-deprecating laugh.
"It was the first time I saw my mother truly angry. She hit me hard and took the gift from my sister. My sister, who was crying endlessly, probably didn't understand why. She would never have guessed that her sister had stolen it."
"...But I don't think she'd blame you," Hikigaya interjected, unable to hold back.
"Ha, yes... After all, she's my proud little sister."
Mentioning her sister slightly eased Ichinose's emotions, and she continued.
"At that time, my mother, still in the hospital, dragged me to the store and knelt to beg for forgiveness. That was when I truly understood the weight of my crime. I even wished I had never been born."
Hikigaya resonated with this confession.
He hadn't expected Ichinose to have such thoughts... It was a bit like himself.
"The store staff didn't turn me over to the police, but the incident quickly spread. Not just to me, but also to my sister... During the next six months of my third year, I isolated myself, spending almost all my time in my room. It was only later that my homeroom teacher told me about this school, which offered free tuition and living expenses and the opportunity to work anywhere after graduation. That's why I came here, hoping to start over."
This was Ichinose's past, a history she had long kept hidden.
No wonder she was so exceptional yet assigned to Class B; there were indeed undisclosed reasons behind it.
"Um..." Hikigaya remained silent for a long while after hearing Ichinose's confession.
It wasn't that he was shocked or anything; he just didn't know how to react. If he had to say anything... well, it was just like this?
After all, he wasn't exactly a paragon of virtue.
Neither Ichinose nor her sister deserved his reproach.
Although Hikigaya hadn't been born into wealth, he had never faced the hardships Ichinose had. Therefore, he had no right to criticize her from a position of superiority.
If anything, he thought that making Ichinose's mother kneel in apology was a bit excessive.
If Ichinose had been made to kneel and apologize for her mistake, it might have been more appropriate. But using self-harm to make her reflect... it was truly misguided.
Especially since Ichinose wasn't a rebellious child, just someone who had made a mistake out of a moment of confusion.
Her mother's extreme approach nearly drove her adolescent daughter into seclusion and became an enduring shadow in her heart.
Of course, education is inherently difficult, and outsiders have no right to judge.
But Ichinose's saintly behavior at school was indeed abnormal. On one hand, it was due to her kind nature, but it was also likely influenced by her past.
It was probably a form of compensation.
This means that when a certain goal is obstructed by some barrier, one might try to fulfill a changed objective to satisfy the original desire.
Having hurt her mother and sister by stealing, Ichinose couldn't forgive herself, so she went to great lengths to be kind to those around her to alleviate her guilt.
"Hikigaya...kun?"
Seeing that he hadn't spoken for a while, Ichinose's face showed unease.
"...Disillusioned, right?"
Her expression was like that of a defendant awaiting a verdict.
"Hmm, not quite." Hikigaya made a show of deliberation. "To be honest, I never had any illusions about you, so there's no question of disillusionment."
Ichinose was taken aback for a moment, then forced a smile of appeasement.
"Ah, haha, I suppose that's understandable, given that I..."
"You're not a saint; it's normal to make mistakes," Hikigaya interrupted, cutting off her self-deprecation.
Mistakes were made, apologies were given, and the store staff had forgiven her.
The matter ended there; there was no need for further discussion.
Ichinose Honami couldn't always be right, and couldn't always avoid mistakes.
In the past, Hikigaya had imposed such ugly expectations on others, but he would never make the same mistake again.
"Or do you think you're a saint? The Virgin Mary?"
"How could that be!"
Hikigaya's jest made Ichinose slightly lift her spirits.
But what she truly wanted wasn't this, was it? Whether it was half-hearted comfort or stern rebuke, she could handle it. What she didn't want was this kind of playful teasing.
Regrettably, as mentioned before. Hikigaya was neither Ichinose's friend nor her enemy.
He wouldn't indulge her.
"Ichinose, let me borrow that hairpin for a moment."
"Huh? Oh, alright."
Taking the hairpin from Ichinose's hand, Hikigaya gently caressed it.
"This beautiful hairpin was a birthday gift from your sister, bought with money she earned through hard work."
"Yes, yes..."
Ichinose's face showed more guilt than joy.
"Have you ever thought about why your sister gave you this? It was her favorite thing."
"That is..."
"Giving you her favorite item as a gift shows how much she values you, doesn't it?"
Seeing Ichinose nod, Hikigaya continued, "On the other hand, this is just my guess... don't you also like this hairpin?"
"Ah? Of course, it's just..."
"No, I'm not talking about it as your sister's gift," Hikigaya interrupted. "I mean, as a hairpin, do you want to have one too?"
"This..."
Noticing Ichinose's expression, Hikigaya immediately understood.
Just as her sister had endured, Ichinose must have too, suppressing her desires.
What girl wouldn't like such a pretty little accessory?
It's not that the sister liked it while the elder sister was indifferent; it's just that the latter bore more responsibilities.
"So, not only your mother but your sister is watching over you too."
Hikigaya solemnly placed the hairpin in Ichinose's hand.
"She probably doesn't want you to dwell on the past, so she gave you a hairpin that both she and you like, hoping you'll wear it proudly in the future."
"Ah... I..."
Ichinose stared at the hairpin in her hand for a long while, her trembling soon subsiding.
She then lifted her head, gazing at Hikigaya with determination.
"So, what about Hikigaya-kun?"
"...What about it?"
"I'm asking how Hikigaya-kun sees me."
Before Hikigaya could respond, she pressed on, "You said you had no illusions about me. So, what do you think the real Ichinose Honami is like? Please tell me."
"Well..."
"Don't dodge the question!"
"Um..." Hikigaya hesitated. This slightly assertive attitude wasn't bad, but it could have been applied to others as well!
After a moment, under Ichinose's expectant gaze, he said, "Ichinose Honami is a smart and kind girl. I guess everyone thinks that way... But I see you as someone who can be very strong at times and very weak at others, a bit of a useless child."
"Useless...!"
Ichinose suddenly bumped her forehead against Hikigaya's shoulder.
"Wait... Hikigaya-kun, that's too harsh!"
She shook her head like a child, trying to hide her flushed cheeks.
If you're embarrassed, don't do it... Silly.
And besides, it makes the other person uncomfortable too!
After a while, Ichinose finally pulled away, her face returning to its usual bright expression.
"I'm sorry, Hikigaya-kun. Looking back, I've always been spoiled by you... But I promise, I won't show such an unattractive side again!"
She clenched her small fist, rallying herself.
"Even for Maki-chan, I mustn't let her see such a disappointing sister!"
Perhaps just a little, or perhaps a significant step. With her sister's encouragement, Ichinose seemed to be moving forward. At this moment, Hikigaya was not going to criticize her further or interfere in her decisions.
But there was still something that needed addressing.
"Ichinose, you can't tell anyone about what happened today," Hikigaya said, his tone serious. "Even if you can handle criticism and blame, your personal matters could definitely destabilize the class. It's imperative that you don't reveal this to anyone, not a soul."
"…Huh?"
Ichinose's attitude seemed uncertain.
Does she not realize the gravity of the situation?
Just as Hikigaya was about to persuade her further, Ichinose hesitated and said, "Um, Hikigaya-kun… What if I've already told someone?"
"Huh?"
"No, it's not a problem!" Ichinose quickly clarified. "The person I told is someone you know too—the Student Council's Vice President, Nagumo. He promised he wouldn't tell anyone!"
"…Nagumo-senpai?"
After the initial shock, Hikigaya quickly regained his composure and began to inquire about the details.
It turned out that back in May, Ichinose had been rejected when she applied to join the student council. Feeling disheartened, she received contact from Nagumo.
According to Nagumo, Ichinose was rejected because Horikita was very strict and placed great importance on social status, which is why she had turned down students not assigned to Class A.
Even if Ichinose later advanced to Class A, she might not necessarily be recognized.
"Why is that?" Hikigaya asked, frowning.
"It's mainly because when entering this school, I wasn't considered exceptional," Ichinose recalled their conversation. "Nagumo-senpai said that no matter how hard I try, President Horikita would never accept a student classified in Class B."
…That damned idiot, how dare he lie so flagrantly.
Hikigaya cursed silently. In reality, Horikita was the exact opposite of what Nagumo claimed. Horikita valued the essence of a person, not trivial rankings or status.
Well, yellow-haired fool.
Now there's an extra reason to take you down.
"And what about me? Don't forget, I'm in Class D."
"Well... about that," Ichinose began, scratching her cheek awkwardly. "Vice President Nagumo mentioned that you got in because of connections... Of course, I never thought that myself!"
Well, that much is true.
Hikigaya sighed, then asked, "So what happened afterward? Why did it suddenly lead to you revealing your dark past?"
"Because... Senior Nagumo believed that, given his own abilities, he should have been placed in Class A. So, when applying to join the student council, he openly confessed the real reason he ended up in Class B, and as a result, I also..."
"…I see."
What on earth is this?
Is this an attempt to deceive an unsuspecting newcomer?
It was May at the time, and as a first-year student, Ichinose hadn't experienced the crucial exams yet and didn't understand the importance of information.
In any case, it was her own responsibility.
However, this notion only applies among students of the same grade.
If Ichinose was duped by a first-year student, it would simply mean she wasn't as skilled as her peers.
But Nagumo, being a second-year senior, pulling such a stunt was utterly disgraceful.
Just like the Class B student who scam new students for points, as a senior, there are certain ethical standards that should be upheld.
Hmph, Senior Nagumo... I suppose I'll address you as such for now.
Hikigaya narrowed his eyes slightly. Since there was no concrete evidence yet, he would have to temporarily accept that person's deceitful words.
But if rumors about Ichinose suddenly start circulating around the school...
He wouldn't hesitate to take matters into his own hands.