"What are you talking about?! You're a criminal and you belong in prison," Cyborg was clearly not going to resolve the conflict, which he had started himself, peacefully.
"Hey, I was acquitted! Ha-ha-ha-ha!"
"Jay Arkham was vindicated," the disabled man with a bunch of augmentations and an energy cannon was adamant.
A creepy grin graced my face.
Since the spectacle was able to conduct a super with direct access to the world wide web and virtually any electronic device, mere mortals don't have even a shadow of a chance of linking my two identities. Unless, of course, I'm confusing things and he really does have such abilities, or else there's not much of a chance. Flash, it turns out, can be dumb sometimes, despite being able to move at speeds close to the speed of light. Although, remembering his not-so-good performance against the Wolf with a backup dancer, Barry wasn't moving that fast, as long as the camera could capture a residual silhouette, and Darkseid's general managed to fend him off with his huge axe, briefly cosplaying a yellow lightning mill.
"So? Everyone thought Arkham was the real Joker. I mean, what kind of injustice is that?! I'm sure you have a few sins behind your dark soul, too. You realize that," I said with a sly wink.
"One more stupid joke about my skin color, and I swear I'll really kill you right here."
"Calm down," Bats's stern voice interrupted our friendly altercation. "Victor, put away your weapon, Joker, stop provoking our new comrade."
"Okay, okay," I raise my hands conciliatorily, just finishing the complex disorientation weave from the mind school I'd created just in case, and wishing I knew any semblance of Mehu-deru.
There is an interesting Force technique in the Star Wars universe, with which you can interact with technology, for example, to modernize or disable it. By the way, surprisingly, local mages have almost no charms for this case, unless you count Taboo spells. But, given their complexity and conceptual principle of influence on reality, it would be smarter to hammer nails with an electronic cryomicroscope.
"Let him then remove that strange cloud around his palms."
"Oops... You can see magic!" my already high spirits are soaring. "It sucks, but even so, it's pretty cool... Ha-ha-ha! What an interesting ability," I pretended to dispel the enchantment, but in fact I was just pulling most of the energy out of it, testing the dark-skinned guy's "visual acuity".
The Cyborg lowered his weapon and sat down at the table, trying to show me that if he was going to communicate with me, it would only be on business matters.
"I still don't understand what the hell they're doing here," he muttered unhappily from his seat.
"We've all made mistakes, but that hasn't stopped us from becoming better," Mouse spoke again as the voice of reason. "The Joker may have done evil before, but he's on our side now."
"I..."
"Seven hours ago, an ATM on Mike Weida Boulevard dispensed a six-figure sum even though there were only forty dollars on the card."
"Heh heh heh heh," I tried in vain to hide my laughter behind a cough.
"I helped a starving family!"
"With money stolen from a dirty mayor," the latex-clad superhero said, staring unblinkingly at Victor.
The robot-man looked away, silent.
I made it to the round table and took a seat between Diana and Harley, trying to figure out what was happening to the weave I'd created. The amazing thing was that it didn't seem to be dissolving into space, but instead hung at my chest level as an almost complete construct. Just give me mana, and I could quickly apply not the most pleasant enchantments to the enemy. Quite an interesting effect to explore.
"All right, we're all here now," said Pompous Mouse. "And the first question I'm interested in is, what about Superman? The Joker? The Joker!"
"А?" I jerked in surprise, and the weave suddenly shattered into pieces, rapidly dissolving into space. I gave the pieces of the structure a sad look and focused on the conversation. "I tried to revive him, but it didn't work, so I just sewed up the wound and hid the corpse. I figured I shouldn't let people know their main protector was dead yet. So, no body, no case."
"Still dead," he froze for a moment, but then continued. "Good... We certainly don't need panic. Victor, what about the Mother Cube?"
~Boom~
The cyborg pulled out a large box from under the table, padded with metal and reinforced with stiffening ribs.
"There is a dark spot in my data stream. I have sensed other Cubes while connecting, I know they are not dormant, but I can't see where they are."
"We can't attack until we know where the enemy's base is," the hairy metal man, who smelled like the sea a kilometer away, decided to play Captain Obvious.
"Even if they did, I've never seen anyone stronger than the Steppenwolf," the Amazon princess interjected, sighing heavily. "Only one man could have fought him on equal footing, but unfortunately, he fell for the trick and fell."
Eh, what a great way to wrap it up instead of calling Clark a moron.
"We can't stay in this place much longer," Cyborg said, squinting at my palms, between which a new weave was beginning to form, with a suspicious look. "While the third box is asleep, the parademons can't see it, but they can sense it. We have to move before they catch up with us."
"No. It's a slow-loss strategy," Bats shook his head.
"Why don't we just destroy the thing?" Flash suggested, raising his hand like a dutiful schoolboy.
"Impossible. It is a form of matter that exists in multiple dimensions simultaneously. It is impossible to harm it. At least, not with our forces and not with our technology," Victor answered.
"You seem to know an awful lot about these things. How do we know you're not with them?"
Surprisingly, those were Aquaman's words, not mine.
"That's right! The technology you're using is very similar to that of Apokolips!" I jumped, finally realizing what was scratching my mind.
Armor structure, weapon parts, a lot of implants, it all looked too much like what I had seen in the dissected creature. Naturally, Cyborg's stuffing looked much cooler, but that didn't cancel out some of the similarities.
"It's... Long story..."
"Personally, I'm in no hurry," I stared at Victor expectantly.
Of course, it's unlikely that he'll turn out to be a spy for Steppenwolf, because in all the comics and cartoons I know, he's usually on Beaver's side, but it doesn't hurt to hear his story again to get a sense of who you'll be working with. I remember in some animated series, he wasn't in the main cast of the League, but was hanging out with his younger comrades, living in a T-shaped glass tower. There was also a gothic cute girl named Riven and an equally cute fiery red-haired alien girl with a very vague idea of Earth culture.
The excursion into Cubs history wasn't exactly entertaining, but there were a couple of interesting points in it.
The box was first dug up by the Nazis in Italy. They found it under some incredibly ancient monastery and decided to give it to their semi-mystical organization Ahnenerbe, which in this world really flirted with dark forces, calling demons and creating an army of undead servants. Fortunately, the Allies successfully intercepted the gift and in the forty-fourth year transported it to America, where it was assigned a long serial number, after which the artifact stupidly thrown in the Pentagon vault for a long seventy years.
Maybe the Mother Cube would have continued to gather dust in the archives if the evil relatives of Kal El had not come to Earth. All would be nothing, the Kryptonians were eventually defeated, Earth was saved, Metropolis was repaired, Superman got his share of glory, but while studying alien technology, one of the scientists suddenly managed to draw a parallel between the symbols on General Zod's ship and the symbols on the artifact. Different civilizations, same approach. And then this genius idiot formulated a theory to awaken the box and put it into practice! Naturally, that genius was none other than Silas Stone. His son had a terrible accident, and Stone Sr. had the idea of crossing Cube technology with the nanorobots developed by S.T.A.R. Labs, turning his son into Cyborg and revealing the coordinates of Earth to Darkseid.
"Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa," Barry jumped. "Isn't that thing a psychotic killing machine designed to enslave all of humanity? Why did it cure you?"
"The Mother Cube is more than a doomsday machine," Cyborg shook his head negatively. "It is a machine of Change. Cubes don't think in terms of healing or killing, life or death. They rearrange matter to the will of their master. They regenerate, restore, synthesize."
"Restored?" Diana, who was sitting next to me, perked up.
"Yes, the Cube is able to reconstruct the primary particle interaction."
"So, if we have some particles that have undergone metamorphosis, the Cube can reverse any process if there is an original substance?" Flash's voice was filled with a strange enthusiasm.
"Yeah. You burn the house down, the particles will remain. They'll turn to ash and smoke. Anyone with a match can do that, but the Mother Cube can return them to their original state..."
For some reason, after that phrase, a few attentive glances crossed my face, distracting me from the incredibly fascinating task of creating a weave frame that could be suspended directly into the aura. Well, I guess that's what it's clinging to and slowly pulling energy to maintain its state. True, my maximum right now is only two not the most killing constructs, like a flash or shield. Something "heavier" for some reason refuses to hang on its own and constantly demands my attention. Though it can't be said that even with simple enchantments everything is smooth. Any emotional outburst can destroy an unstable structure, and I've never been able to boast the calmness of a Buddha.
"Why are you staring at me like that? My house is intact, and it doesn't need to be rebuilt from the ashes... Although, if I need anything repaired, I now know who to call. Cyborg, do you have an ATM machine built into your hull? I don't carry much cash on me."
"Superman," Gloomy Mouse said pathetically, as if that would explain everything.
Okay. Stop...
"You really want to try to revive Superman with that thing? Maybe we should dunk him in the Lazarus Pit," I looked at my comrades with great surprise.
Bats thought for a few moments.
"No. The Lazarus Pit is mind-shattering and personality-shattering. I don't want to imagine what it would do to Superman. It's too much of a risk."
"Yeah, and this alien thing isn't a risk?! I don't know what kind of technology is involved. Maybe Cyborg really is a secret spy and just doesn't know it."
"My creation utilized nanorobots developed by my father. Cube helped only a little, providing them with energy and sharing some technological solutions."
"Would someone please explain what the Pit is? - Aquaman intervened.
"The source located above the Dragon Dwelling. I explained, but seeing the incomprehension in my companion's eyes, I continued without going into details."
In short, he can easily revive the dead, even not very fresh. But Bats is right, the consciousness after it shakes significantly, and frequent use is addictive. But I like the box idea even less. Harley, what do you think?
"I agree with Mr. J."
"Who would doubt it," Victor snorted.
Man, he pisses me off even more than Flash. I wish he had the same personality as Leroy. I mean, we've only met Cyborg for a short time, but even from his narration and intonation, you can tell he's a fucking asshole.
Got in a car accident? Blame his dad for not picking him up from the soccer game on time. Lost a limb? Silas didn't use his connections and didn't have time to find a cool wizard surgeon. Turned into a cyborg with a bunch of cool toys and now you can become the face of a company that produces action figures? That's something to think about, by the way. Dad could restore the body to its original form using the power of the magic box.
"Let's take a vote. All those in favor of using the Cube?" Bats asked the question.
Hands raised by Cyborg, Bats himself, throwing me a guilty look Diana and Flash. Not a speedster, but a bastard. I'd saved his life, you might say, by not killing him, but instead spending the liquid hypnosis I had in my only copy.
"Who's in favor of throwing the corpse into the sun?" suggested I.
Hands were raised by me, Harley and Aquaman.
"Wait, what the fuck is the sun?" the stubby Atlantean, who could be on the cover of some heavy metal album, stared at my satisfied face in shock.
"I'm not an idiot to bathe a powerful Kryptonian in some incomprehensible green stuff of magical origin. Our alien friend gets his powers from the sun, so we just need to get him into space! Isn't it obvious?!"
"Only a madman could come up with such an idea..." Cyborg shook his head dejectedly.
"Hmm..." Bats thought for a moment.
"Wait, you agree with him?" the guy looked at the latex-clad superhero with shock.
"It may seem strange, but the idea of the Joker is not unreasonable."
"But we don't have time to test that theory. There are two artifacts in Steppenwolf's hands, and it's only a matter of time before he builds an army of parademons and comes for the third," said Diana.
"Oh, speaking of which. One Cube is fake. I created it when Wolf went after the Amazons."
"And you didn't say anything?"
"Well, no one asked," I shrugged in response to the beautiful warrior's indignant exclamation.
"Then... We really should try to revive Superman," the superhero's voice was full of pathos. "If before there was a danger that when the Cube was activated, Steppenwolf would arrive and activate the Unity, in light of the new data, he would first have to take the last artifact from the battle-ready Amazons. Joker, where did you hide the body?"
***
I don't know how the Greatest Detective's brain works, but he's decided that the revival of Earth's chief protector is only likely to succeed with the use of alien slime. So, right now, we're all flying on Mouse's huge airplane to Metropolis to bathe the sunny boy in the broth of a Kryptonian ship charged with the power of the Mother Box, where the fake Doomsday was relatively recently created.
The flight, according to the instruments, would last about an hour, during which time I planned to finish the gift for Babs, deal with the parademons' parts, and get to know the members of the future Justice League. Surprisingly, the first person to make contact was Aquaman, who stood out from the rest of the superheroes with his powerful physique and normal outfit, consisting of comfortable black jeans, the same color T-shirt, sneakers, a dark beige coat with a fur lapel thrown carelessly over his shoulders, and a huge trident. He had a memorable appearance, too: a thick black beard and mustache, a tangled mane of dark hair, a bunch of tattoos, and very unusual eyes with a light blue iris around the black point of the pupil.
In short, Arthur Curry was incredibly brutal, and he didn't give a shit that the Joker had once been a criminal. So we found common ground with him pretty quickly, discussing the future stages of the operation, as well as why I needed alien bug wings and their hearts and brains.
It wasn't very convenient to create a magic artifact with a spell and at the same time explain the main points to the audience, which was suddenly joined by an interested Barry, but I managed. After listening to a mini-lecture on various magical items, the half-breed allowed me to examine his weapon. The trident turned out to be quite simple, but no less effective. Strengthening runes, an elemental converter capable of creating water projectiles from the surrounding moisture, and an energy store. It seemed like nothing interesting, but the total efficiency of all the runes was approaching almost ninety percent for water-colored magic, although it usually struggles to reach sixty when using the right materials. So I memorized all the symbols faithfully before I began a thoughtful study of the cybernetic implant that had replaced the beetles' brains.
I don't know why, but it turned out to be incredibly primitive, as Cyborg and Bats, who had also investigated it, confirmed. In essence, it was a high-tech slave collar of one of the alien races, completely subjugating the user to the will of the master. Of course, the implant's functionality was a little wider than simple subjugation, for example, it was responsible for the use of flight functions of the armor and for a very peculiar "swarm mind", but, in general, nothing extraordinary from the Parademons should not be expected. It is even surprising that they have a working system of recognizing their own-alien, and they do not confuse their superior with anyone, given the almost destroyed mind, which is dominated by animal instincts.