I don't own DC or anything
In a room that physically didn't exist, on a metaphysical plane neither here nor there was a large round table with five chairs… Was this perhaps some annual meeting of gods? A discussion about the duality of man? Whether or not the Earth was worthy to be in the hands of humanity?
No, it was poker night.
A door in this room that didn't exist suddenly opened, and a woman in armor entered, resting her spear against the wall and removing her helmet, letting her thick golden braids flow down her back. However, no sooner had she done that when the door opened again, revealing a monkey-faced man with a golden crown on his head and wearing sunglass. He winked at her, chuckling under his breath as his six ears all wiggled in greeting.
"Hello, Brunhilda."
"Macaque." She replied softly, blue eyes narrowing at him. He leaped deftly over the table, landing gracefully on the chair opposite hers, perching on his seat first before dropping down.
"We the first to arrive?"
"Seems so." she replied as the door opened abruptly and a tiny grey owl fluttered into the room, swirling around above them before landing in front of one of the other empty chairs. "Greetings Nyctimene." The little howl hooted and preened her feathers, fluttering excitedly as the door opened again.
"Hey, sorry I'm late. Toppled dictatorship." The cheery goth woman added casually as if that explained her delay.
"You're right on time." Macaque noted, "Haven't started yet…" he said before knocking the felt top of the table and a stack of cards appeared. "Are we all here?"
The punk goth woman glanced at the empty chair. "She not coming?" she asked rather dejectedly. "That's the fifth time."
"Perhaps we should find a new fifth?" asked Macaque.
"Cthulix has expressed interest in playing with us." Brunhilde said abruptly. "…Between driving mortals mad of course."
"I vote for Keith David." The owl hooted at Macaque's declaration and he sighed dejectedly, "Well a man can dream, can't he?"
"I can talk to him for you if you like." Replied the punk goth woman smiling beautifully at Macaque who blinked at her, his six ears twitching as he asked hesitantly.
"…Keith David or Dream?"
"Dream."
"Oh thank Buddha." Gasped Macaque in relief as, amazingly the door opened and a beautiful woman walked in, white-winged and dressed as the Earth woman know by her alias Silver Swan. "…Well that's new."
"Dee? I love the new look." The punk goth smiled as 'Dee' looked down at her body and groaned. She then snapped her fingers and her original form appeared, blue and demonic, her black feathery wings stretching and her long tail snapping irately on the floor. "Been awhile."
"Sorry, I haven't shown up recently." She mumbled irately, "…My boss is a demon." She scowled as Macaque chuckled.
"Well haven't they always been demons? But I thought you were freelancing now."
"No. My NEW boss is worse." Declared Silver Swan angrily, "Much worse than any of my old bosses. Including that one guy who REALLY liked impaling people. Especially women and children." Nycityneme hooted curiously as Silver Swan shook her head. "Well no, not worse than him, it's hard to be worse than a Nazi." She rolled her eyes. "But this one? Slave driver… she tricked me. ME! Into a binding magical contract!"
They stared at her as Brunhilde's stern face finally broke in curious surprise. "…She tricked YOU?" she said in disbelief as Nycityneme hooted again in awe.
"ME!" repeated Silver Swan angrily, "I mean… I'm the reason people think Genie's are tricksters! I'm the one that beat Loki in a prank war! I fooled Death herself!"
"It was a very convincing costume." Replied Death admittedly with a warm smile.
"But this… WOMAN…" sneered Silver Swan. "…She puts the oracle of Delphi to SHAME." Death blinked curiously, suddenly far more interested in the story than she had been. "She's clairvoyant! She had a blood contract collecting dust for YEARS, just waiting for someone like me to show up! All the powers of a demon at her fingertips and you know what she does?"
"Hoot?" Nycityneme asked but Silver Swan shook her beautifully demonic head.
"You'd think that but NO! No all she has me do is wait tables, collect tips, and whore myself out like a common Succubus! I'm a damned greed demon! Not some lust floozy!"
Death's hands slapped the table as she said, with far more excitement than a personification of death should be about this matter. "You're a Superbabe!!" she declared as if playing a game of twenty questions with her dour brother, Dream. "That is so cool!"
"Cool?!" sneered Silver Swan furiously. "Cool!?! I'm being pimped out!"
"Oh, she doesn't like that word, you're a 'delivery girl'." Said Death calmly. "Like the Japanese Delivery Health thing."
"That's… its-!" Silver Swan's red eyes twitched angrily,as she tried to find the words in her fury. "I'm still being whored out!"
"Well yeah but it sounds better. What do you think Macaque?"
Macaque who had been rather quiet during this tirade noted calmly. "I've always just preferred concubine myself." He said conversationally but cleared his throat noticing Silver Swan's glare. "I'm just saying."
"You are no stranger to sexual activity what makes this so different?" Brunhidle asked casually.
"I'm not doing it willingly!" Silver Swan declared loudly.
"Well no offense Dee but you are pretty attractive." Death said apologetically, "If I were Orders and I had you under my thumb I would totally be raking it in." they stared at her, "What? I like watching interesting people. Do you have any idea how fun it is to tease my brother about Superbabes? It's hilarious." Nycityneme hooted. "See? Nycityneme agrees with me."
"Just because she's Athena's pet of wisdom doesn't mean she's smart." Snapped Silver Swan sourly as Death coughed, trying not to laugh.
"That is exactly what it means." Brunhilde declared straight-faced. "You are just upset that you were tricked." Silver Swan glared at her, "Is this not the case?" she asked cutting her retort off as Silver Swan blushed angrily, "As a very talented trickster yourself you are merely lashing out for your lack of control in a situation you've found many of your targets in." they stared at Brunhilde now as she looked between them. "I've been courting a psychologist in Valhalla. He was quite the amateur pugilist."
"Oh, I know that guy he really was." Said Death nodding agreeably. "Great fighter."
"Can we get back to me?!" snapped Silver Swan as Nycityneme hooted. "Shut up, what do you know?!" she pouted, slumping in her chair and groaning. "She's so damn infuriating." She added irately as Macaque decided to finally stop shuffling cards and deal them. "She works me harder than a plow horse in spring. With extra plowing!"
Death snorted with a laugh, "Emphasis on the plowing?"
"Uugh! She has me working double shifts next weekend!" she added irately as Death glanced over her cards.
"…You guys think we can meet up earlier then?" she asked as Macaque shrugged.
"I'm free."
Nycityneme hooted agreeably. Her cards hovered before her beaked face as she looked over them.
"I am also free, but I may also be… plowing." Brunhidle noted smugly as Death elbowed her playfully.
"Oh! Cheeky. Okay, then ladies and Gentleman. What are we all playing with?" she then produced a pile of drachma next to her. "Got a lot of these in Greece as Charon they're just taking up space now." She said casually as Nycityneme hooted. "Oh sure." And she spotted her little owl friend a bag. "There you go, take em."
"I got some… uh." Macaque patted himself curiously, before producing a few peaches. "Peaches?"
"You are playing with fruit again?" noted Brunhilde.
"…Is jade good then?" he asked, producing a few shiny rocks.
"Good enough." She replied dropping some old viking gold coins on the table. Silver Swan suddenly blinked and checked her toga.
"…Shit. Hold on." She fidgeted around inside her clothes, her big breasts bouncing distractingly as she finally produced- "Son of a bitch. Uh… Superbabes stamp cards?" she said, putting them on the table. "…Eat there enough and you get to enter some sort of raffle." She said conversationally. Death snorted with laughter again, grinning cheekily as Silver Swan glared at her, "What?"
"Oh, Demona are you in for a surprise when that Raffle happens." She said as Demona scowled and growled angrily.
"…Son of a bitch." She sneered, getting a general idea of what happens now that she thought about it. "…Fuck she's going to make me participate isn't she?!" she hissed.
"Knowing her… yeah." Death nodded, smiled, winked then dropped one card. Officially beginning their usually weekly game of poker. "One please. Oh and one of those stamps too. I want to see Dream's face when I give him one, the little perv."
End