I don't own overwatch
St Patrick's day… I hate St Patrick's day. Loud assholes using it as an excuse to drink, skanks a little more skanky, and the obnoxious noise and dangerous roads thanks to tourists. And in my house, It's the most terrifying day of the year. I went through the list. Hidden Car keys. Check. Hidden Queen of Blades. Check. Hidden secret stash of Queen of Blades. Check. Now all I had to do was get her in her room.
My mother slowly drove up the driveway, she walked calmly into the house and watched me for a moment, and sighed. "Is that really necessary sweetie?" dressed in my old football gear and wielding a bat I slowly nodded.
"Mom… you remember what happened last year with the llamas? The mayor said you had to skip the next one because it got so wild or the charges wouldn't be dropped."
She sighed again, "…Fine. I guess I'll get to my room…" putting her purse and things onto the walk-in dress she started up the stairs. "Seriously though? You think just because I wouldn't be able to drink on the drinkyiest day of the year I'd get violent?" I followed her to her room, holding the bat like a sword as she chuckled and entered her room. Smiling lovingly at me. "That's so cute…"
"Uh huh… by the way I moved your stash for the night." I noted, and her face fell as I shut her door and locked her in.
"You never let me have any fun!" she yelled as I sighed in relief. I suppose there was a chance she could go out the window but we were on the second floor and that didn't work so well last time.
"Just watch some TV mom you've had a long day." I said and stripped off my pads to head down the stairs to do some TV of my own, "I'll bring some spaghetti and meatballs up for you later alright?"
"There better be extra marinara or you're in trouble tomorrow mister!" she ordered, and I sighed. Prepping the cooking before adjourning myself to the couch.
I had just finished her dinner when there was a loud knock on the door. I frowned, I wasn't expecting anyone. Making sure everything was properly turned off I went to the door, surprised to find Ms. O'Deorain standing there in a tight green turtle neck and matching slacks, with simple green heels.
"Happy Saint Patty's Scott!" she smiled, her face a little red as she invited herself in. in One hand she held a pair of normal-looking green bottles. But I was hesitant.
"Ms O'Deorain what are you doing here?" Carefully.
"Your mother called me!" she smiled, a little more cheerily than normal, "Something about an Alcohol emergency?"
"Mom's not allowed to drink today this year… and I forgot to take her phone." I grumbled, crossing my arms and wondering if I should take away her extra marinara. "I'm sorry you came all this way too…" she sat down comfortably on the couch and I sighed again, I suppose she shouldn't really be out there tipsy. I'll deal with her in a moment. Walking up the stairs to deliver my mother's food I made sure to take her phone.
"Ah come on Scott Candy crush!" she replied as I locked the door behind me again. "…Thank you for the extra marinara sweetie." She added sheepishly as I looked through her phone, checking her other calls. The other recent call was Lena. I scowled and dialed her up.
It rang for a few moments as I sat next to my apparently proud to be Irish teacher. Then… "Sarah I'm not bringing you beer! Remember last year with the knife juggling clowns?"
"Oh good." I said, as she gasped. "I thought I'd have to yell at you." I mumbled watching Moira curiously as she stared at me with a small smile. "…Think you can come over to get Ms. O'Deorain? I'd drive her home myself but I need to make sure nobody tries to escape. And knew where she lived."
"Oh.. yea alright love I can do that." She said sweetly. "I'll be right there alright?" and with that, she hung up as I sighed again.
"…Ms. O'Deorain why are you looking at me like that?" I asked curiously as she handed me one of the green bottles.
"I wanted a drinking partner…" she pouted rather adorably for someone like her. "But you locked her up. So now you have to take responsibility." She cooed, "And call me Moira…" she added with a whine, "You know me intimately enough Scott…" she breathed the alcohol on her breath brushing against my skin.
"I don't really like drinking Ms. Moira." I said rather practically at this point.
"Take responsibility…" she repeated childishly, tilting the beer towards my lips. "Just one."
…Mother fucking… bad choice. God damn peer pressure. I took a swig, and her face quickly changed to a very unnerving grin… Oh god damn it.
Everything began to spin…
Was that… flute music? And fiddles? I blinked my eyes open as the world was a shimmering shining green. A vast broad Rainbow hung in the sky as I closed my eyes and opened them slowly again… no still there… I groaned and got to my feet, wondering where I was.
"There you are!" came a familiar but silly-sounding voice, like a British woman doing an Irish accent, as I turned and saw… Lena? Dressed up like a leprechaun and sitting on a pot of gol- no wait… those are potatos…
Wow, this hallucination was racist…. Why was I having a hallucination again?
"Hey bucko!" the silly-voiced Lena spoke skipping towards me. Each stepped a field of four-leaf clovers spring up as she stopped, bending over to look into my eyes, and grinning. "You got to help me! The Banshee's coming for me gold!"
I looked over her shoulder at her 'pot of gold' and I frowned, "Those are potatos."
"What?! No not those!" she said dismissively, "That's my lunch! I mean this!" she held up her left hand revealing a very nice golden wedding band, "I don't have the equipment to stop the banshee! You do!"
"…I do?" I looked down, finding myself wearing solid green clothing but no 'equipment' that I could see.
Then came shrieking, an unearthly moan from nowhere as Ms. O'Deorain flowed through the fog surrounding us, she looked pretty much the same except for wearing a shroud over her body and her face looked painted up like a kiss band member. Her mouth opened wide and a torrent of sound emitted from it, pushing us back.
"You're equipment!" Leprechaun Lena repeated, "You've got to Plug the hole!"
Wow… just… fucking wow.
I approached Banshee Moira slowly, walking through the noise like I was trenching through molasses and pudding until I slapped my hands onto her shoulders and with some great ease I lowered her down onto her knees, her mouth opened wide in a perfect 'o' shape blasting up at me as I unzipped, and popped my cock into her mouth.
"…This is the weirdest fucking way to get a blowjob I've ever experienced…" I mumbled as Banshee Moira glared angrily up at me, but she could've done anything to stop me really.
"Good! Now all you got to do is make sure her throat's all filled up." Leprechaun Lena smiled, skipping next to me as lucky charms, wow this is really racist, blinked from her aura and yet more clovers sprang from her feet. Then taking her hand and rubbing it through Banshee Moira's short red hair she added, "They like it though…" at this banshee Moira's hands wrapped around my waist and she pulled her lips down my cock as she began sucking. "They're just as good at sucking as they are at blowing!"
She was not fucking wrong. My hand joined hers massaging Banshee Moira's skull as she went carefully to work, her throat and mouth vibrating as she tried to 'shriek?' I guess but in only served to enhance the feeling of her tight warm mouth, her tongue vibrating on my length as her throat seemed to tighten around it.
Leprechaun Lena licked my neck, "Go on hero… she likes it… blow your load and plug up her throat. Fill her belly with your thick, sticky man juice…" she nibbled my ear, her tongue swirling into it as Banshee Moira sped up, her grip tightening around me as Lena's hand tightened in Moira's hair.
"I'm cumming…" I moaned, feeling Banshee Moira's head get down to my balls, then all the way back up as if to escape.
"You got to force her now. Shove your equipment down her throat and slowly pull back out, she won't swallow you got to coat it.
Force was a strong word, because Banshee Moira slid easily back down my length of her own will, her cheeks bulging as she moaned, and I released deep in her throat as she slowly pulled back up. My load squirted in her throat, then her mouth and she pulled away with a pop, looking up at me with a wide mouth and an outstretched tongue as I shot the last of my load all over her face. She watched my face as her cum covered tongue lapped gently away at my twitching cock, only to get one last squirt to fly across her delighted face.
Then she promptly stood up, waved her abnormally long fingers at me, and added in a huskily rather throat voice. "See you next year…" before blowing me a sticky cum kiss and turning, vanishing into the fog.
"Welp… thanks for that!" Leprechaun Lena smiled, about to skip away. My hand lashed out and grabbed her wrist and she paused a little in surprise.
"…If my lore is right…" I said rather blearily. "…Leprechauns are supposed to grant a wish when you save them. I did right?"
"Yeah…" she said slowly, "That's true but… you're a hero you know! The job is its own reward!" she smiled cheerily at me.
"Yeah, nice try but this is my… apparently racist I'll look into that, hallucination so I want a wish."
She sighed rather exasperatedly and her, honestly not bad Irish accent vanished to be replaced with her… cockney? welsh? I wasn't sure I'll look into that too. "Fine, what do you want?"
I forcefully turned her around, ripping at her tight green pants revealing her bare ass. With funnily enough a heart tattoo on the left cheek. I spanked her heart-tattooed cheek and she yelped as I spread her ass wide.
"Well you're a cheeky wanker ain't cha?" she said rather tiredly, but that soon changed to pleasured shrieks of delight as I shoved my erection deep into her ass. "Oh Fuck you're a big boy!" she hissed as I groped her breasts from behind and pulled her against me. I wildly clutched at her tits as I shoved up into her, her legs actually leaving the ground as I slammed my length against her soft pillowy ass, making it jiggle as my hips slapped noisily against her.
"You're so tight…" I hissed, squeezing her harder and making her shriek in pleasure and pain as I let my hand flow down her slender body to her crotch, shoving my hand into her pants and finding her pussy I rapidly shoved my fingers in and out of her. She leaned forwards trying to adjust to the pleasure but I held her firm, unrelenting in my rapid fucking of her tight welcoming ass.
She came, hard shrieking her release as her whole body tightened on me. I pulled her back, holding her in the air as I continued to fuck up into her ass from behind, her feet bouncing helplessly as her eyes rolled up and down in her head her ass squeezing rhythmically as she made a rather silly cacophony of pleasure noises. Awkwardly I adjusted her so that her legs were spread wide and her pussy on display. Not entirely sure how I got her pants off for that, but I'll chalk that up to a hallucination. She leaned back on me as I kept fucking up into her ass.
"You have hands…" I ordered softly into her ears between her gasps, "Use them…" her hands lowered obediently to her pussy, gently caressing her folds as they leaked arousal to the ground, splashing everywhere as I thrust continuously into her. Soon her legs tightened in my hands, she began panting more desperately, her fingers moving rapidly…
She screamed, "I'm cumming! Oh fuck I'm cumming!" her pussy squirted like a fountain, a tiny rainbow reflecting off the light from it as I buried my cock in her ass and fired my seed deep into her hole. I dropped her carefully onto the ground, still inside her as her face pressed to the floor and my dick still fired into her ass. Her eyes rolled as the orgasm claimed her mind and her face scrubbed against the clovers on the ground.
I pulled out of her ass, her body still trembling as her ass made a popping squirt noise, and my seed flowed slowly out over her pussy onto the grass. I gave her ass a finally smack… then I eyed her ass one more time… then shoved my cock back in as she moaned.
I closed my eyes and enjoyed the wet sloppy feeling of her warm, wet used hole as I moved slowly in and out…. Then I heard a slurp… and I opened my eyes…
Moira lied naked on… apparently my bed, her legs spread before me and her various holes well lathered with my cum as her head hung off the edge of the bed, my dick firmly planted in her sloppy, messy cum mouth, moaning delightedly as my hips mechanically thrust in and out of her hole as her throat bulged visibly as she took me deeper and deeper.
"…Oh you fucking bitch…" I said coldly, realizing immediately what had happened and her eyes shot open, struggling slightly as I gripped her throat tightly with both hands and she began slapping my legs. "STOP FUCKING DRUGGING ME!" I growled angrily, throat fucking her as her legs and arms thrashed about, moaning in terror as I raped her throat, I slapped her tits, and steadily and rapidly moved in and out of her struggling mouth as she groaned desperately slapping my legs.
"STOP…" I thrust, and she grunted feeling my hips slap her lips and my balls smack her nose, "FUCKING…" I demanded, firmly pulling out and doing it again as her whole body quivered, "DRUGGING ME!" I snarled and squeezed her throat tightly as her whole body shook violently as I felt my own hands through her skin tighten around my cock and I released…
Her hips shot up and her pussy fired a fresh torrent of her squirt across my sheets as I buried my length into her, feeling her nose brush against my balls as mucus, seed, and spit slathered her face desperate for air as I finally pulled out and smack her face with my sloppy cock. She opened her mouth, letting me slap my cock against it as she slowly, and annoyingly began to chuckle…
"…Stop making it so easy…" she said cruelly, slowly but steadily getting off the bed, gently wiping the mess on her face off with her fingers as she carefully licked them clean as if I didn't just try to introduce her to Saint Patrick himself. "…Happy St Patrick's." She said with a callous wave of her mess hand, spreading it across my bed and heading towards my bathroom apparently to clean up.
I frowned… I didn't feel good, it might have been the drugged alcohol she made me drink. But it was probably deeper than that. She left without another word after bathing and redressing, and I took off my sheets and bedding, tossing them into the laundry angrily as I sat on the couch and watch tv…
My front door opened and Lena walked inside, she was… ironically enough dressed like a sparkly leprechaun, complete with a silly tiny top hat. "…Hey where's Moira?" she asked curiously, watching my face for a moment and… frowning understandingly. She sat quietly next to me as I stared into the TV, the old movie I was watching moving through its paces…
Then slowly, she wrapped a comforting arm around my shoulder and pulled me onto her chest. Holding me in a hug as I closed my eyes, and breathed in her smell, tiredly trying to forget tonight…
I hated St Patrick's day.
End of Chapter