I lay on the bed, my eyes stinging with tears of frustration. The thoughts racing through my mind were too much to bear. Just when I thought things couldn't get any worse, I heard a knock on the door. My heart skipped a beat. Who could it be?
"Open up sweetie."
Oh no, it was Amelia! I knew she probably came to mock me like she always did. She loved to make me feel small and worthless.
I tried to sound firm and confident, but my voice came out trembling.
"What are you doing here?" but it didn't come out the way I wanted it to. She just laughed.
"Quit crying like a baby. I told you no one would ever fall in love with you."
She had a smug, cruel smile on her face. I wanted to tell her to leave, but I couldn't find the words. I felt too weak and powerless.
"How could you do this to me, Amelia? We're sisters, remember? You're supposed to be there for me, not tear me down like this."
"Sisters? Not in a million years. I could never be a sister to someone like you. You're such a loser, and you always will be."
I tried to find the words to defend myself, but I just couldn't. I felt so small and powerless, even though I was older than her.
"And for George, he came to me begging to be his girlfriend, so I said yes, I don't think there is anything wrong with that, is there?" She let out a loud laugh.
"Amelia, leave," I muttered, trying to be firm.
"I'm leaving. I can't stay with a loser like you for too long. I'm allergic to losers." Her eyes scanned my unkept room, and she let out a disgusted sigh before leaving.
She was gone, but her cruel words were still echoing in my head. They made me feel even worse, and I cried until I had no tears left.
How could someone be so cruel I couldn't help but wonder if her cruelty was inherited from her mom.
******************
"Grrrr Grrr."
I growled in frustration as my alarm went on. Why was it morning so soon? With a groan, I dragged my arm out from under the covers and hit the snooze button. The sound was like nails on a chalkboard, and I wanted to throw the alarm clock out the window.
I got out of bed and made my way to the bathroom to wash my face. When I glanced in the mirror, I noticed my eyes were swollen and red from crying last night. I looked like a mess, and I felt like one, too.
I knew I had to go downstairs to get my Slim tea, but I dreaded the thought of seeing Amelia or her mom. It wasn't that I was afraid of them, but I was afraid of the way they made me feel.
They had a way of making me hate myself more than I already did, and I didn't want to feel that way again.
Just as I was about to give up hope, I heard a knock on the door. It was Monica, our house help. She was a middle-aged woman with a kind smile and a gentle demeanor. I felt a sense of relief as she walked into the room.
"Good morning," I greeted, forcing a smile. I knew I looked tired and miserable, but I didn't want to burden Monica with my problems.
"Good morning, dear!" she responded with a warm smile. "Did you have a good night?"
"It was fine," I lied.
There was no way I could tell her how terrible my night had been. I just wanted to get through the day as quickly as possible.
"You look sick," her voice was gentle and full of concern. "Are you sure you're feeling alright?"
I forced a smile, trying to reassure her.
"I'm fine."
My voice was not quite convincing even to my ears. "I'm a bit run down. Nothing to worry about."
Monica had been like a mom to me since I was a child, and her concern was touching. But there was no way I could tell her about the pain I was in.
"I brought you your usual morning tea." She placed the cup on the nightstand.
"Oh, thank you so much," a genuine smile broke through the forced expression I had been wearing.
"I was just about to come get it."
"You're welcome, my dear," I'll go downstairs and make breakfast now." And with that, she left.
I opened my laptop and began to check my emails. I had applied to dozens of jobs, and I was desperately hoping for a response. I needed a job so I could earn enough money to move out. I couldn't stay in this house any longer. I needed my own space, away from my family.
I knew I needed to move out and get my apartment. Nobody wanted me here. My dad was always away on business trips, and my mom... I'd never even met her.
According to my dad, she had left when I was a baby to pursue her dream of becoming an actress. I felt like a burden in this house, unwanted and in the way.
My heart skipped a beat as I saw an email from Epsilon Corporation. I couldn't believe it. I had applied to many companies, but Epsilon Corporation was the biggest and most prestigious in Lumina City.
I couldn't believe they had responded to my application.
I received a message inviting me for an interview. At first, I felt elated - a huge smile broke out on my face. But as I sat there, staring at the message, I felt the creeping tendrils of doubt. I wasn't sure I could do it. I wasn't sure I was qualified. What if they saw through me and realized that I wasn't good enough?
As I sat there, my confidence faltered. I imagined myself sitting in front of a cold, stone-faced interviewer, who would see right through me and realize that I wasn't good enough. self-doubt wracked me as I sat there.
I tried to think of all the reasons I was qualified, but it felt like my mind was a blank slate. I was terrified of the impending interview.
The interview was a week away. Maybe I could muster up some confidence before then, I thought. But as the day went by, it seemed more and more impossible. I tried to think positively, but my self-doubt kept creeping back in. I took a deep breath and tried to calm myself. I had to be ready for this interview, no matter what.