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You call this Beast Taming?!

COSMIC_WITHER
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Synopsis
In the bustling city of Xianxia, where mystical creatures roam and cultivators strive for power, Yin Fang stands out like a sore thumb. Unlike the tragic orphans with hidden legacies, Yin Fang's backstory is refreshingly mundane—he was simply abandoned at the steps of the Heavenly Lotus Orphanage. But Yin Fang has a peculiar habit: whenever he's surprised, he exclaims, "Holy Chicken Fingers!" It's an odd choice of words, but it's become his signature catchphrase. Perhaps it's his way of coping with the mundanity of his life. Everything changes when Yin Fang unwittingly triggers a celestial phenomenon—an otherworldly tribulation. Lightning strikes him not once, not twice, but thirty-six times. Each bolt of energy sears through him, leaving behind a strange mark on his skin. When the storm subsides, Yin Fang discovers that he has awakened the elusive Beast Evolution System. Now, Yin Fang must navigate a treacherous path. With no tragic past to motivate him, he faces a different kind of challenge: taming unruly beasts and forging bonds with them. His journey is filled with laughter, absurdity, and unexpected friendships. As he trains his newfound abilities, he wonders if he can turn his lack of backstory into an advantage. But lurking in the shadows are ancient secrets, rival cultivators, and a whole lot of beasts observing him in secret. Can he rise above his humble origins and become a true beast tamer? Or will he forever be the eccentric orphan who shouts about chicken fingers? Join Yin Fang on a whimsical adventure where lightning strikes, beasts evolve, and "Holy Chicken Fingers" might just save the day!
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Chapter 1 - Chapter 1: You got to be kidding me!

Yin Fang was reborn as a new person in this world like earth

Yin Fang: This has to be a joke!

Yin Fang screamed at the author because for no reason he was put infront of a dragon

Yin Fang: Holy Chicken Wings! you goddamn author send me to the beginning already!

Yin Fang said in a rage

In the present world,

Yin Fang woke up from his bed all sweated up

Yin Fang: That was probably the worst beginning I had seen!

"DUDE STOP BREAKING THE GODDAMN FOURTH WALL ALREADY!"

Yin Fang heard the voice and tilted his head to the side

Yin Fang is an orphan who has nothing at all

His parents didn't die any sort of tragic accident too, when he was 3 his parents just sent him to the orphanage because he was born with no special abilities at all

Yin Fang: Well whatever I will just go outside for a walk

Yin Fang opened the door of the cottage given by the orphanage

"What a pleasant weather" Yin Fang said as he stepped outside while looking at the clear blue sky

Suddenly,

"Zap!" A thunder striked him

"What the actual hell?!" Yin Fang was speechless

"Well atleast it doesn't strike twice at the same place" Yin Fang felt a relief

When again another strike fell upon him

"IS THIS A TRIBULATION OR SOMETHING?!" Yin Fang was furious

"Zap!" "Zap!" "Zap!"

Thunder kept striking him every single time each being more deadlier than the previous one

After 36 consecutive strikes, it stopped but well it was not that lucky for Yin Fang

Yin Fang liad there motionless and charred black

"Ugh" Yin Fang said and got up

"I was joking when I said about the TRIBULATION don't just send me one!" Yin Fang was furious

[Hello, Host]

"Holy Chicken Fingers What the hell?!" Yin Fang was speechless

[Host, I am the Beast evolution system and I am here to make you stronger]

"But why me?" Yin Fang was surprised

[Host, you were able to survive a goddamn tribulations of 36 lightning strikes so why do you think other commoners can have me?!]

"Fair enough" Yin Fang nodded

[Host, currently you have no contracted a beast so please contract one]

Yin Fang nodded and went to the school

Today is the entrance exam of the school so if he misses it then he might aswell kiss his dreams of becoming a beast tamer goodbye

At the school,

"Alright everyone pls sit down and stay quiet and open the devices on your desk to start your exam" The teacher said

Yin Fang followed the instructions and opened his own

"First Question: How to Earth Worms excrete" Lin Fang was stunned

"WHAT THE CHICKEN TENDER IS WRONG WITH MY DAY?!" Yin Fang screamed in his heart but continued to answer the question

"Second Question: If you were to find a python how will you catch it with bare hands?" Yin Fang was speechless

"IS THAT EVEN POSSIBLE?!" Yin Fang was furious

He kept answering and reading questions

"THESE THINGS ARE GETTING MORE AND MORE RIDICULOUS FIST YOU WANTED ME TO CATCH A PYTHON AND NOW YOU WANT ME TO FISH A LEVIATHAN?!" Yin Fang kept cursing in his heart because of so many ridiculous questions

3 hrs later,

"Alright everyone stop typing and submit the papers, your scores will be released soon" The teacher said and made everyone disperse

"Ugh finally done with these ridiculous questions!" Yin Fang muttered to himself and went outside the room

In the hallway,

Yin Fang found a empty bench and sat on it quietly watching others

"How was your exam?"

"It was the hardest paper ever"

"I felt like having a sheet of jokes like literally!"

All kinds of comments were popping up in the discussion amongst the students

*Sigh*

"Ding!" A robotic sound rang and everyone looked to the huge screen

"Damn it I am last!"

"50th place is not too shabby"

Yin Fang logged into his profile and check the rankings

"First place?!" Yin Fang was stunned

[Host, congratulations on placing first]

"How the hell did you know?!" Yin Fang was stunned again

[Host, I am connected to your mind so of course I know]

"Huh?!" Yin Fang looked around

Everyone one was minding their own business

"So it's true??" Yin Fang calmed down

"That really scared me i thought everyone will know about my GOLDENFINGER!" Yin Fang muttered to himself

[Host, please tame a beast soon]

"Ok I will" Yin Fang said and went to the reception

"Scanning.... Please enter your id" A robotic voice sounded

"Yin Fang ID: Y00********GF21"Yin Fang replied

"ID confirmed retrieving info"

"Good Evening Junior Tamer Yin Fang please collect the Tamer Card, you can use it for identity confirmation so please do not lose it" The robotic voice said

Yin Fang nodded and left

Yin Fang began to walk across the road and a huge bridge, he saw a huge laboratory infront of him

"Please show your ID" Another robotic voice said

"Scanning... Id confirmed"

"Hello Junior Tamer Yin Fang please follow me to collect your beast" A Robotic said

Yin Fang nodded and followed it

They stopped infront of a huge cage

"Chi?" A caterpillar squeaked at the Yin Fang

"System, Bind!" Yin Fang muttered to himself

Suddenly various chains of red light began to enclose the caterpillar with two spheres with a simple star pattern on the top and bottom

[Author note: here is the pattern

*

* *

* * *

* *

* ]

The two patterns covered the caterpillar and it disappeared and then reappeared in Yin Fang's Consciousness

[Congratulations Host, you have successfully contracted a normal caterpillar]

"Yes finally" Yin Fang nodded

Unlike the rich families, Yin Fang was a poor person and a orphan who lacks next to no money at all so even a simple caterpillar can be considered a blessing for him

After confirming the contract was successful, Yin Fang left the base and went to his little cottage while buying some leaves on the way

At the cottage,

Yin Fang summoned his new beast

A gate appeared with a sand clock symbol on it and a small caterpillar, the size of his pinky finger crawled out of it

"Hello little guy!" Yin Fang smiled and brought his finger close to the caterpillar

"Chi!" The caterpillar also squeaked and climbed on his finger

"System" Yin Fang said in his consciousness

[Yes Host?]

"I have tamed the caterpillar now what?" Yin Fang said

[ Host now you can say upgrade to upgrade a skill of your beast or evolve to evolve the skill]

"I see" Yin Fang frawned

Normal caterpillar had no special skills and the only known skill they had was called web spitting and intimidate which are both extremely low level skills

"Upgrade" Yin Fang said while looking at the Web Spitting skill

Suddenly a huge pain came into his mind like a needle was pecked into his head with a hammer

"Ugh it hurts!" Yin Fang held his head in pain

On the other hand, the caterpillar was suddenly covered in white light

The white light faded lost instantly and the caterpillar didn't look much different at all

"So what happened even?" Yin Fang was confused

"Chi!" "Chi!" The caterpillar kept jumping

"You mean you feel different?" Yin Fang was stunned

Once a beast tamer contracts a beast, they can easily understand what the other party is feeling

"Alright use Web Spitting!" Yin Fang said

The caterpillar stood on its hind legs and began to learn back a little and suddenly it spat a long string of web

"Huh?" Yin Fang was confused

He tried to hold it but felt no different at all

"Use Web Spitting on this paper" Yin Fang said

The caterpillar once again used the skill but this time, the web made a little hole between the paper

"It's stronger" Yin Fang was stunned and smiled

But he remembered that he had to suffer from alot of pain just to upgrade this llw level skill so if he wanted to upgrade it further or upgrade a higher level skill his brain might explode!

Thinking about this Yin Fang shuddered from fear and went to sleep

The caterpillar also followed the trend and slept on a bundle of leaves next to it

End of the chapter