The owl attacking me reminds me of that horror movie, "The Birds." I dive down to keep from accidentally injuring the Great Horned Owl while he's trying to claw my face off.
Until now, I was a fan of owls. Smart birds.
II pop up and eyeball the circling bird of prey. Going round for another pass, he seems to be making up his mind whether or not to try again.
"Call him off," I order.
Athena Delfino, who today has her hair in a ponytail and is clad in-hugging gold-colored workout wear, narrows her stormy eyes at me. "Are you going to move them off my floor? I always stay on the top floor. Your grandparents knew that."
"But Odin—er, Mr. Alfather said that those rooms have been his forever."
"YES, and in the past, I have tolerated it for your grandparents' sake," she says in a musical voice, with a Greek accent.
I glare at the bird hovering close to me. "But you both thought I'd be a pushover because I'm the new guy, huh?"
Athena stiffens, looking as if she's made out of marble. "Preposterous."
"I don't think so. Otherwise, why would your bird attack me? I love owls. I even named my latest software O.W.L. Everyone thought it had something to do with Harry Potter or was part of some sort of government surveillance program. Instead, it was Optometry Wizard Lookup. It was a program that allowed you to self-diagnose eye problems and also find a good eye doctor."
My nerdy soliloquy catches her off guard. "Was it unsuccessful? I would think there would be a sizable market for that, what with you people always glued to screens."
"That's what my team thought, but turns out there's a lot of competition," I admit. "Still, it did okay. I'm still earning a bit of cash from it."
Her slender shoulders loosen up, and I can see the dewy sheen from her workout. She's a beautiful woman, no question. "So, it was reasonably successful, and yet you chose to uproot and take your grandparents' place."
"NO ONE can take their place."
Her eyes lighten up a bit. "Of course not. But you will see them again."
"From your mouth to God's ear."
I have no idea why she laughs so heartily and pats me on the back. I have whiplash from her change in attitude.
"I wasn't sure what to make of you, after all these years. But I think you'll do. At the very least, you'll be interesting." Her eyes narrow. "Provided you can solve my problem."
I've been in enough meetings with enough so-called angel investors and other people who are just blowing smoke to know when something is off.
"Let me see what I can do."
I look up her guest file on the computer while pretending to check the available rooms. Athena Delfino has been coming here for—
Wait.
That can't be right.
According to this, she's been coming here for at least thirty-five years, ten years before I was born. But she looks like she's in her thirties.
I look up Odin Alfather. A customer for thirty-five years, too. His sons look like they're my age.
What is going on here?
I don't understand this inn at all. But I do understand that Athena and Odin have been staying here for thirty years. Surely, she's learned how to put up with him and his sons.
I strongly suspect that this is a test of some kind. Nothing to base that on. No hint. Just what I would call my Spidey sense.
"Sorry," I say. "Mr. Alfather refuses to move, and in any case, we're going to be booked solid this weekend and possibly next weekend. I can send some earplugs or noise-canceling headphones to your room, free of charge. Maybe you could take melatonin. And I can speak to the Alfather family about respecting quiet hours."
I brace myself for the yelling that's surely coming my way.
For a long moment, Athena stands there, scanning me with what feels like X-ray vision. Then, finally, she nods, a small smile on her face.
"I don't need sleep aids," she says mysteriously. "I will approach Odin myself, out of professional courtesy."
"Oh, is he a writer too?"
Her eyes widen in surprise, and she nods, evidently figuring something out. Her voice lowers. "Come to my room later, after dinner. There is much you need to know."
Her perfume hits me just right. She smells of lilies. Is this accomplished writer and older woman hitting on me?
"Ah. Okay. We'll talk about your concerns then."
I hear the porch steps creaking, not once but multiple times. More guests! I said we were going to be full, but I was exaggerating for Athena's benefit.
"If you'll excuse me, duty calls. I've got to keep the lights on."
Athena grins. "Yes, you do. This place must always be a beacon for like-minded souls. Until tonight, Mr. Thomas. Come, Aeneas."
The bird flies past, and I swear to God he smiles at me before he lands on Athena's shoulder.
What a day. A pirate, the cast of a Marvel movie, and a possible cougar with a Greek name. It isn't even dinnertime yet. What next?
Evidently, a monkey.