Chapter 190: The Ways of the World - Your Heart and My Heart; Only Wish to Know Each Other's Heart
Gu Tingye stared at the candle flame and asked, "You really can't stand Shen Xiong, can you?"Minglan rolled her eyes and replied, "The Duke Shen not only serves as a pillar of the state, but he was also born lucky. He gets promoted, becomes wealthy, and loses his wife. How many people long for such good fortune? I don't dare to dislike him at all."Gu Tingye turned to look at her, while Minglan casually pulled out a short hairpin from the side of her head and gently flicked the candle flame.He said, "These troubles and setbacks today are largely due to Shen Xiong's weakness and hesitation, so your view isn't without merit. However... you haven't seen the Shen Xiong from before."Minglan paused her actions slightly and set down the silver hairpin. "When was this 'before'?""Before he entered the capital and received his title."The flame on the round mutton-fat white candle, about an inch wide, gradually brightened. Gu Tingye's gaze grew heavy as he said, "When I first entered Shu, the first person I got to know was Shen Xiong. At that time, he was the commander of the royal guards and, along with Duan, Zhong, Geng, and Liu, was known as the Five Tigers of the Shu border, famous throughout the southwest. Although he was the youngest, he was the leader of the Five Tigers.""The brother of the princess, how could he not be the leader?" Minglan remarked sourly.Gu Tingye ignored her sarcasm and continued, "If you had seen Shen Xiong back then, you would never have imagined he would become so indecisive today. Even the Zhou family at that time was not as reckless as they are now. Back then, there was Lady Zhou."Minglan fell silent for a long time before responding, "...She must have been an impressive woman."Gu Tingye nodded and continued, "Lady Zhou was sincere and generous, with more insight than ordinary men. Not only did she make decisions about family matters, but even the princess also obeyed her. At that time, Shen Xiong was decisive and courageous, clear and straightforward. In larger matters, he assisted the prince in managing the border; in smaller matters, he treated his brothers with kindness and generosity. Although the Zhou family's children had no significant achievements, they were able to lead a stable life, either studying or taking on small tasks, relying on the Shen family for their livelihood.""Having such a formidable presence like the River Dong Lion guarding the place, no demons or monsters can possibly enter." Minglan's sarcasm seemed to lack some power.Gu Tingye couldn't help but laugh. Minglan's remarks reminded him of the first two times he met her when she was still a little girl with two long hairpins, her mouth sharp and relentless, lacking any semblance of tranquility. Though her words were sharp and biting, he found her quite likable. There was no pretentiousness or affected decorum; she was refreshingly straightforward and bright. Even when she put her hands on her hips and scolded others with a stern face, he thought she resembled a cute, chubby porcelain doll.He unconsciously softened his voice. "Brother Shen and Lady Zou have been married for more than ten years, yet they still act like newlyweds, inseparable. I've seen it with my own eyes while visiting the Shen family; with just a look or a hint, Lady Zou knows exactly what her husband wants without needing to ask. When Lady Zou furrows her brow or turns her head, Brother Shen immediately understands what she is thinking. When we chat together, they often speak in unison, sharing knowing smiles; the couple communicates without words... that is true love, a deep connection where their hearts resonate. I... never knew that a loving couple could be like this."Minglan noticed a change in his tone and looked up at him, realizing that he was thinking of his late father and the Da Qin family. Their love was a tumultuous fate that nearly harmed everyone involved, while the affection between the Shen and Zou couple was healthy, positive, and beneficial for all."That year, chaos suddenly erupted in the capital; the Third Prince was executed by an imperial edict, and the rebellious prince met his end..." Minglan couldn't help but interrupt, "The emperor's fiefdom is far away in Shu, separated from the capital by a considerable distance. You received the news quite quickly; it seems the current emperor had ambitions early on."Gu Tingye glanced at her and replied, "That news was delivered by me; the waterway is faster."Minglan was taken aback and exclaimed, "Ah!""When the news arrived, several officials in the prince's residence said that the Sixth Prince had been demoted, the Fifth Prince was brutal and had never been favored by the late emperor, and with the previous princes all deceased, the imperial throne was likely to fall to the current emperor. However, Mr. Gongsun said that the situation was still unclear and the late emperor's intentions remained unknown. The princes could not leave their fiefdoms without an edict; if there were any unusual movements, it could lead to misunderstandings, turning good into bad. The few of us brothers didn't dare to be idle, either remaining vigilant or preparing the troops, each of us like a drawn bowstring, waiting for news from the capital."Minglan asked, "Then... what was the marquis doing at that time?"Minglan swallowed hard, "That was... someone who used to follow you? Is he from the Caogang?" No wonder these past two years, the accounting office had gradually been disbursing money to several families, all of which had been sent to collect by Che San Niang.Gu Tingye's expression turned grim as he nodded—those few were good brothers who had followed him for many years."When the late emperor's edict to summon us to the capital arrived at the Shu border, sure enough, the nefarious elements began to stir all around. Liu Zhengjie captured and killed four or five batches of assassins in just three days, while the Duan brothers protected the empress and several young princes, turning half of the prince's residence into a river of blood. However, by that time, the emperor was already on his way. I and Brother Shen divided our forces into two paths, one open and one covert. He had been the captain of the palace guards for over a decade and knew that there were many who would not be absent; thus, he led the guards down the open road. Meanwhile, I, along with Old Geng, protected the emperor by secretly bypassing the official road, taking a different route."He furrowed his brow tightly, seemingly recalling those heart-pounding years, "Brother Shen faced countless assassination attempts on his path. On the surface, they were bandits, but in reality, they were colluding with the rebel army. Brother Shen nearly lost his life, and Brother Zhong lost his second brother and a nephew. As we neared the Zhili border, we could no longer conceal our route. Old Geng fought desperately at the rear, nearly losing an arm and a leg, and also sacrificing the lives of two of Geng's brothers. I fought a bloody path to protect the emperor until we finally saw the city gate, where the governor of the nine gates led troops out to escort us, marking our safety."Ming Lan listened with her heart racing, her palms slick with cold sweat.She still remembered how the entire capital was waiting for the crown prince. They waited left and right, and it took the Eighth Prince several months to arrive. At that time, she had muttered a few words about the backward transportation in ancient times, not realizing there were so many twists and turns behind the scenes.No wonder the emperor trusted these few so deeply; this kind of loyalty earned through blood and life was indeed not something that the capital's powerful elites could replace with a few tears or declarations of loyalty.These powerful noble families were deeply entrenched, their interests intertwined in complex ways, and who knew what lay at their core? On the other hand, Gu Tingye and his companions had truly staked their lives and fortunes on the emperor. What is a trusted confidant? In the past, when the great general Xiang Yu swept across the land, he still relied on his Jiangdong comrades the most. Li Zicheng rose and fell several times, and the core of his support was always the group that initially rallied to him; as long as these brothers were around, he could surrender or fail repeatedly and still make a comeback (most of those people later fell victim to a stone).[**Xiang Yu (232–202 BC)**: A prominent figure during the late Qin Dynasty and early Han Dynasty in China, Xiang Yu was a military general and warlord known for his exceptional battlefield prowess and leadership skills. He played a crucial role in the rebellion against the oppressive Qin Dynasty. Xiang Yu is best remembered for his rivalry with Liu Bang, who would later become Emperor Gao of the Han Dynasty. The two leaders faced off in the famous Battle of Gaixia, where Xiang Yu ultimately lost. His life and legacy are often romanticized in Chinese literature, where he is depicted as a tragic hero.**Li Zicheng (1606–1645)**: A Chinese rebel leader who played a key role in the fall of the Ming Dynasty. He initially rose to prominence as a minor official but became a leader of peasant uprisings due to the widespread dissatisfaction with the Ming government. In 1644, he captured Beijing, leading to the collapse of the Ming Dynasty. However, his rule was short-lived; shortly after taking the capital, he faced opposition from the Manchu forces, which ultimately led to his defeat and the establishment of the Qing Dynasty. Like Xiang Yu, Li Zicheng's life and actions have been depicted in various stories and plays, highlighting the themes of rebellion and loss.]"No wonder that no matter how many mistakes Old Geng makes, and no matter how much trouble Shen Congxing causes every day, the Emperor still needs these people. As long as they can get the job done, complete their tasks, and are absolutely loyal, the rest is just minor details.""What a throne of supreme power, stained with the blood of countless people!" Ming Lan said softly.Gu Tingye shook his head, sighed, and continued, "During the time we were away, the Empress and a few of the young princes suddenly fell seriously ill..."Ming Lan was suspicious. "Seriously ill?"Gu Tingye replied, "I don't know if they were truly sick or if someone poisoned them. In any case, the atmosphere in the Wangfu was tense at that time. Though the brothers Duan and Liu could fend off strong enemies and capture assassins, they were helpless regarding internal matters. Thus, Madam Zou had to personally enter the Wangfu to take care of them, even though she was already pregnant.""Later, the Empress and a few of the young princes recovered, but Madam Zou..." Ming Lan's voice trembled.Gu Tingye showed a look of regret. "When Brother Shen hurried back, he only saw Madam Zou for the last time.""... No wonder the Empress favored Madam Zou so much," Ming Lan remarked."Brother Shen fell seriously ill as well, nearly following her," Gu Tingye said in a low voice. "Since Madam Zou's passing, Brother Shen's actions have become increasingly erratic."The two fell into silence for a long time, and then Ming Lan suddenly laughed. "The affairs of this world are indeed interesting. If the Empress hadn't recovered, then the troubles of the Zou family would have become the troubles of the Shen family. Madam Zou truly devoted herself to her husband's family."After a moment of silence, Gu Tingye slowly said, "Mr. Gongsun told me that you are the most insightful woman he has ever encountered." — Reality is often so ugly and helpless.Ming Lan said bitterly, "The more one understands certain matters, the more desolate one feels in their heart."Gu Tingye looked at her for a while and said, "Having discussed other people's affairs, let's talk about ours now."Ming Lan replied indifferently, "Alright. I wonder where Lord Hou intends to start.""Let's start with the birthday banquet at the Qi State Duke's residence that day."Ming Lan suppressed her anxiety as she listened to Gu Tingye say, "After I returned that day, I often felt unhappy. You have always guessed, thinking it was because of the names of those two children from the Qi family, right?"Meeting the man's dark and profound gaze, Ming Lan could only nod in acknowledgment."You've always been clever and composed in handling matters; why would you be so flustered regarding this?" Gu Tingye asked quietly. "It's just a guilty conscience."Ming Lan had no retort and sat with her head lowered.Gu Tingye said, "You didn't even ask Xiao Luzi a few more questions. Do you know what happened afterward? That day, I was waiting impatiently at the door, so I took a few steps inside and heard what you and Qi Heng were saying."Ming Lan's heart raced, and she opened her mouth to argue but couldn't say anything.Gu Tingye carefully scrutinized her expression and said lightly, "Look, you're flustered again. Childhood friends can talk for a bit; besides..." He smiled, "It wasn't exactly flattering.""Then what are you really angry with me about?"Ming Lan pondered this for a long time. It was neither about the names nor about her talking with Qi Heng, so what was this man really getting worked up over?"You have never spoken to me in that tone before," Gu Tingye said calmly. "You are dignified and courteous; you have never lost a bit of decorum even in front of the matriarch. Except for Qi Heng, you have never spoken to anyone else like that."Ming Lan still remembered scolding Qi Heng a couple of times with harsh words. Could it be that this man was jealous of that? She couldn't help but be astonished and blurted out, "Why not? I—I don't depend on him for a living...""Because you need to rely on me for your living, that's why you treat me with such respect?" Ming Lan flustered, "No, that's not it..." Her face turned red with anxiety. "You're taking my words out of context!"Gu Tingye's expression was serious as he suddenly stood up. He walked around the room, his tall figure stopping in front of Ming Lan. "I've known for a long time about that kid Qi Heng's feelings for you. Even if he really named his child after you, so what? What others think has nothing to do with us. What I care about is what you think in your heart. Do you...?"The rest of his words were hard for him to utter. It was ridiculous that, after being so brave all his life, he was feeling timid at this moment."No. I know what you want to ask. I've asked myself this question many times." Ming Lan looked out the window for a while, as if pondering for a moment, then continued, "...No, I have never had any romantic feelings for Qi Heng.""So certain?" After a moment, Gu Tingye asked.Ming Lan replied calmly, "Long ago, I already knew that I could never have a marriage with Qi Heng. Since that's the case, why bother to say more? I'm not the kind of gentle and emotional young lady from a story; I will never let anything inappropriate happen." Gu Tingye scoffed, "Madam is quite wise. It would be a pity for Qi Heng to have such deep feelings; if he were to hear this...""I've said even harsher things to him before," Ming Lan said directly.Gu Tingye glared at her, and Ming Lan met his gaze openly. After a moment, he looked away.Ming Lan raised her chin and declared, "Just because someone likes me, must I like him back? Hmph! The world isn't that simple!" These words had been bottled up inside her for over ten years, and now she couldn't care less; she simply let them all out."I lost my mother when I was six. In my family, my stepmother favored my fifth sister, and my father liked my fourth sister. If it weren't for my grandmother's kindness, who knows what would have happened to me? Someone like me can't afford to make a single mistake!"The more Ming Lan spoke, the angrier she became. She suddenly stood up, standing tall in front of the window. "Princess Pingning wouldn't even look at a legitimate daughter from the Sheng family, let alone me! Qi Heng knows this, yet what does he want from me? To whisper sweet nothings under the flowers and moonlight, or to keep it a secret? What happens when he marries a proper lady someday, and I'm left to suffer in silence, heartbroken for a lifetime?!"—Dream on! She would never allow herself to be sad over an unworthy fate!After a long silence, Gu Tingye finally spoke, "Earlier, I heard that Qi Heng and the princess have quarreled many times over their marriage.""So what?" Ming Lan retorted sharply. "When I was in Dengzhou, my grandmother took me to the countryside to escape the heat. I saw the cages used to drown women and those locked away in the family ancestral hall. If Qi Heng really had the ability, he wouldn't let me live in fear. He should just marry me properly. If not, he still insists on making a fuss about it, and a mere 'private exchange' could cost me my life!"As she spoke, she wiped her cheek, and a tear fell.Gu Tingye was taken aback by the deep pain in her eyes.Ming Lan held back her tears and said, "Lord Gu, men and women in this world are different. Just because a man invests a certain amount of affection doesn't mean a woman should repay it equally. You can be reckless for years and then turn your life around, achieving success and fame. But for a woman, if she takes a single misstep, it could ruin half her life! What would the kind-hearted grandmother who raised me think of herself in front of others?"Her chest heaved violently as she coldly laughed, "So, Lord, you can rest assured. No matter how close childhood sweethearts are, the fear and anxiety from that time have drowned it all. I was too busy being afraid to think about any romantic feelings. Such a precious thing—I, a mere illegitimate daughter, cannot afford to indulge in!"Gu Tingye felt a wave of bitterness and pain in his heart, not daring to look up at her, slowly sinking down at the edge of the chaise.Ming Lan returned to her stool, pressing down on the moisture in her eyes, forcing herself to hold back. "You just spoke to me about Madam Zou, and I understand your meaning, Lord. But I do not agree with Madam Zou's actions. Does the failure to protect the Empress mean that the Duke of Guo will be in danger? Besides, the Empress is favored by heaven; she might endure this. If you truly love someone, you should protect yourself well for their sake!"From a positive perspective, the Da Zou family sacrificed their lives to care for the Empress out of deep familial love. But from a realistic viewpoint, with the Eighth Prince about to ascend the throne, the Da Zou family likely wanted to desperately maintain the glory of the Shen family and ensure that Shen's nephew could smoothly succeed."Madam Zou exchanged her life for the current glory of the Shen family. I want to ask the Duke of Guo: was it worth it?!" Her tear-soaked big eyes resembled a bright moon in the water, piercingly cold as they stabbed into Gu Tingye's heart. "Before you even think about whether I would be willing to learn from Madam Zou, you should first ask yourself: if you were the Duke of Shen, would you want me to use my life to exchange for your husband's future?!""I would never do that!" Gu Tingye yelled, slamming his fist down hard on the chaise, which broke the intricately carved cluster of begonia flowers at the head of the chair with a loud crack.The room fell into silence as both of them remained quiet for a while, Gu Tingye breathing heavily with flared nostrils.Ming Lan looked at him sorrowfully. "Suddenly seeing the willows by the road, I regret that I asked my husband to seek a noble title. If it were me, I would be content just living an ordinary life with my husband. Now that Madam Zou is gone, is Duke Shen truly living well?"Gu Tingye stared blankly at the woman across from him. "I'm not blaming you; it's just that every time I bring up Qi Heng, you always seem inexplicably anxious..."Ming Lan felt as if he had touched the deepest part of her heart, where the hidden ugliness she had tried to conceal came crashing down. Supporting herself against the table, she said sadly, "...I feel guilty because when someone treats me sincerely, I only think of myself."Gu Tingye suddenly looked up.Ming Lan's eyes were brimming with tears. "He treated me well, without counting the gains or losses, and he never looked down on me for being a concubine's daughter; he just wanted to be good to me. He truly wanted to marry me, and he went through so much trouble for it. But I... I only cared about protecting myself. As long as I could be safe and sound, I never cherished him even a little."Large tears rolled down her delicate face as she cried, "You're right to doubt me. In this life, I have only ever loved myself."Gu Tingye looked into her sorrowful eyes, and in a daze, he couldn't tell if she was expressing regret for Qi Heng or for him.He stood up and reached out, intending to wipe away the tears on her face, but suddenly stumbled back a step.A chill spread through his heart.Ming Lan lifted her head, her face covered in tears, and said sorrowfully, "I'm sorry for how well you treated me. I truly am a heartless person."Yes, that's just who she was. What could he do about it?Gu Tingye only hated his natural inclination to dig deeper into matters. How nice it would be to be more oblivious; after all, many couples live happily together this way. She had made it very clear—she could never be as open-hearted as Mrs. Zou. So what could he do?He had lived for nearly thirty years. Even in his youth, he had been willful and unruly, never willing to swallow his humiliation in silence. Later, as he traversed the martial world and navigated the court, he had never felt so powerless. It was only today that he realized how weak he truly was.He was reluctant to let go but was also unwilling to accept it. Her tears were like sharp blades; seemingly soft, yet each cut deep. Her low sobs felt like needles piercing the most tender parts of his heart.Suddenly, he stood up and hurriedly left the room, returning to his study. He randomly pulled a book from the shelf, flipping through a few pages restlessly. Outside, Gu Quan peeked in cautiously and softly called out, "Lord, Mr. Gongsun is looking for you."Gu Tingye sat in the dim yellow light, motionless. "Did the gentleman say what it was about?"Gu Quan said, "The gentleman didn't elaborate. He just placed a file on the left shelf and told the Lord to look at it when he returned." He glanced at his master cautiously and added, "It seems the Lord has been assigned another task."Gu Tingye turned to the left shelf and picked up a piece of fine white silk paper, skimming through it quickly. After a long silence, he said, "Go to the outer courtyard and tell the gentleman that I'm aware of this matter. I'll seek him out early tomorrow morning."Gu Quan bowed his head, bending slightly as he exited and gently closed the door behind him.He wasn't sure how long he sat there, until the half-burnt candle on the coral lampstand extinguished, leaving the room in darkness. His limbs felt stiff as he slowly rose. However, instead of going to the side chamber where he had been sleeping recently, he aimlessly walked back to Jiaxi Hall.The four-poster bed had been draped with a canopy, layers of thin silk and gauze in the lake blue color that Minglan liked, fading from dark to light, resembling the willows by the southern rivers. Outside, the rain began to fall softly, adding a chill to the night.Minglan curled up in the corner of the bed, fully clothed. Her delicate and dense long hair spilled over the pillow, cascading down the side of the bed like a waterfall. Her long eyelashes were still damp with moisture, looking like a wronged and sorrowful child, with her left hand curled into a small fist against her cheek.His heart tightened suddenly, as if it had been gripped tightly.That night, he had someone clear away the bedding from the side chamber of the study and move all the items back to the main house.※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※The author has something to say:The Battle of Shibian was a famous battle during the late Ming and early Qing dynasties. It is said that while Li Zicheng was happily occupying the Forbidden City, he expressed his deep affection to Wu Sangui at Shanhai Pass. Unfortunately, time flows indifferently; since losing Chen Yuanyuan, Wu Sangui turned to be with Dorgon.So, while Li Zicheng and Wu Sangui were engaged in a fierce battle at Shibian, many long-haired soldiers appeared to join the fray.This time, Li Zicheng suffered greatly, almost losing more than half of his forces.—To be honest, I'm not a big fan of Li Zicheng. In our history, there have been plenty of peasant uprisings. If you had the audacity to overthrow the Ming dynasty, at least you could have been more capable! Why couldn't you be like Zhu Yuanzhang, a man of great talent, and establish a solid foundation for yourself?In the end, this guy only knew how to cause chaos and had no ability to build anything, resulting in all the men in the country having to change their hairstyles, leading to more than two hundred years of baldness. It's really hard to know where to begin.
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