Mr Potter?" Professor Lupin asked when Harry walked into his office.
"I seem to recall that we were supposed to have a talk," Harry reminded him as he closed the door behind him. "I recall that we were supposed to talk after your lesson, but you didn't show up."
"Ah, right," Realization appeared in Professor Lupin's eyes. "My apologies, I forgot to inform you that I had a prior engagement that night."
"It's alright, I was angry at first before I remembered that that night had a full moon," Harry explained, perhaps taking more pleasure than he should have in the way that Professor Lupin's face paled.
"I beg your pardon?" Professor Lupin blinked. "I...I'm not entirely sure what you mean."
"And I am entirely sure that you are entirely sure about what I mean," Harry replied as he walked forwards and stopped in front of Professor Lupin's desk. "I mean, it's rather obvious by now, isn't it?"
"I really don't know what you mean," Professor Lupin insisted. "I think that perhaps you and I should just go and..."
"I know that you're a werewolf," Harry interrupted him with a long sigh, feeling that this conversation probably wouldn't go so good if the man was already going to start lying to him.
"H...How did you know?" Professor Lupin gulped slightly as he stared at him.
"My mother had written it in one of her diaries," Harry shrugged, lying with more ease than he was comfortable with.
'Is it a bad thing that I am a good liar?' He asked Venom.
'Nah, just means that you're creative.' Venom reassured him.
"Oh," Professor Lupin let out a deep sigh. "I suppose that makes sense, Lily always did write down notes about everything." He muttered to himself before speaking to Harry. "Please, don't tell anyone, if you do then I could lose my job and..."
"Relax, I won't tell anyone, I promise," Harry told him in an honest voice before he paused as a thought came to him. "Unless you intentionally try to harm me, in which case, all bets are off."
"I guess that that's fair enough," Professor Lupin ran a hand through his hair.
"Where were you?" Harry asked sharply before Professor Lupin could say anymore. "I've been in the magical world for a few years now and haven't even heard of you, you never came to visit me or even send me a letter in the muggle world. You were apparently one of the best friends of my parents, what the hell happened? Why did you leave?" Harry asked quickly.
"It's sort of a long story," Professor Lupin let out a deep breath. "You see, Harry, the war had been going on for what had honestly felt like decades. We were all tired and miserable, even if we were able to convince ourselves otherwise, or at least most of us were. It was a horrible time, nobody knew who we could trust, in fact, I believe that my friends were even beginning to suspect me due to my rather...' furry' nature. I had been out of the country when I received news that your father and mother died," Professor Lupin paused and took in a deep breath before he continued. "It was a miracle that you had lived and I was glad, of course, but I was in no state to look after you. My friends were all dead, brought to their deaths by a traitor who I had truly believed to be my friend, most of my blood family was dead and I was more than a little depressed. Not to mention that I wouldn't have been able to get guardianship of you anyway, it's hard enough for a regular werewolf to get guardianship over anyone, never mind a known friend of Sirius Black getting custody of the boy-who-lived.
I had spoken with Dumbledore, he had told me that you would be safe at your relative's house and that they would look after you and care for you. I figured that was better than having you being looked after by me."
"Better for you or me?" Harry asked in a quiet voice.
"Both," Professor Lupin answered with a small nod of his head. "I was not ready for that responsibility, nor was I capable of handling it, and this way you wouldn't have your childhood messed up by me. This way you've been able to at least live a fairly normal life in the muggle world." Professor Lupin had looked down at that moment and therefore did not see Harry's body stiffen at that last comment. "And I am glad that so far it has worked out, you know, I'm sorry I wasn't there for you, I wanted to be, really. But...it's all worked out, you're happy and healthy, aren't you? And you've lived a good life, yes?" Lupin asked, looking up at him and seeing a blank expression on his face.
"I see," Harry whispered before he turned and walked to the door.
"Harry?" Lupin asked, looking confused and shocked.
"Thank you for your talk, I'll be going now," Harry spoke in a bland tone before making his way out of the classroom, once he was out he quickly began walking down, idly dodging any students that were walking in the opposite direction. He kept walking and walking until a few minutes later he found himself in the owlery.
Harry walked to the guard rail and placed his hands on it to support himself, he bowed his head, letting out a very deep breath. He heard the flap of a pair of wings and suddenly felt something land on his right shoulder, without looking he already knew that it was Hedwig, he was proven right when she affectionately nipped at his ear before rubbing her head against him. Harry's back tingled before he felt something move, and a second later a tentacle with Venom's head on the end had popped out. Venom allowed his head to hover just slightly above Harry's left shoulder.
"He left us." Venom growled slightly.
"He had his reasons, I suppose." Harry sighed, closing his eyes.
"Perhaps, but that doesn't mean he couldn't have done more." Venom stated as he moved forwards and stopped so he was now facing Harry. "If he couldn't look after you then why didn't he send letters? Why didn't he visit at least once? Where was he when we came back to the wizarding world? He wasn't there!" Venom hissed, leaning his head closer to Harry. "He clearly didn't think we were worth the effort, he can act all he wants but he doesn't care for us."
"No," Harry said after a moment. "He doesn't." Harry agreed, Venom had made some very good points in Harry's opinion. What had stopped Lupin from sending presents or letters or even visiting? The man had taken Dumbledore's word for it and left him to the Dursleys. Best of all, Lupin was apparently under the impression that Harry had lived a happy and healthy life, as far as Harry was concerned, Lupin was only under the impression because he hadn't cared enough for Harry to ask.
"Don't worry, Harry," Venom spoke up, breaking Harry from his thoughts. "No matter what happens, you will always have me. There will always be 'us'."
"Us." Harry softly repeated. "I...I like that." He couldn't help but admit it, he rather did like the feeling of always having at least one constant in his life. Sure he had Hedwig, but there was only so much interaction one could get from an owl, even one as intelligent as her. As for Venom, he might be an alien with an obsession for eating brains and flesh, but beggars can't be choosers as the saying goes. Harry was about to say more when Venom suddenly whipped himself back into Harry's body.
"Harry," A voice called follows by the sound of light footsteps, a second later Tonks walked into the owlery. "Are you alright?" She asked gently.
"I'm fine, what are you doing here?" He asked. "Do you need to send a letter?" He guessed.
"Not really," Tonks shook her head. "I was here because I had seen you walking like a man with a purpose to somewhere and I followed after you. Figured that the worst-case scenario was that Black had somehow got a hold of you and was bringing you to him."
"Could he even do that?" Harry blinked.
"Harry, he was reportedly the right-hand man of you-know-who," Tonks pointed out. "Trust me, he is not to be underestimated. All of the information I have available to me stated that he was a pretty powerful wizard even in school. We don't really know what he's capable of."
"Fair enough," Harry sighed. "Well, as you can see, Black's not here." Harry gestured around himself.
"No, just a bunch of owls, including this cutie," Tonks smiled as she walked over to Harry. "What is she called?" Tonks asked, staring at Harry's owl.
"Her name's Hedwig, the smartest owl here," Harry declared proudly, Hedwig puffed her chest out while a few of the other owls made various noises in protest. "Yeah, that's right, I said it," Harry told them.
"Nice to meet you, Hedwig!" Tonks smiled brightly before gently raising a hand and petting Hedwig who happily leaned into her touch. "Anyway," Tonks said to Harry as she continued petting Hedwig. "What's up with you?"
"What do you mean?" Harry asked.
"You looked pretty upset earlier," Tonks shrugged. "What happened? Did your girlfriend cheat on you or something?"
"I don't have a girlfriend," Harry blinked.
"Oh, so that rumour about you and Hermione?" Tonks gave him a questioning look.
"Very much not true, thank you," Harry said in a dry voice as he shook his head, resisting the urge to roll his eyes. "Hermione and I are just friends."
"Oh, don't like the bushy hair?" Tonks guessed.
"It's nothing to do with her looks, she just isn't my type, to be honest." Harry shrugged slightly, being careful to not shake Hedwig much. It was the honest truth since Harry heavily suspected that he and Hermione would end up in a lot of arguments if they got together. Hermione was the sort that always liked to be in charge, and while Harry didn't mind that at times, he knew it wasn't something he'd want in a partner. Harry liked to think of himself as fairly independent and the last thing he wanted was to be bossed around for the rest of his life, he had enough of that from Aunt Petunia, thank you very much. "Our personalities are just a bit too different."
"Oh, okay, fair enough. So if it's not girl troubles then what is it?" Tonks asked.
"It's nothing important," Harry said dismissively, the slightly annoyed look on Tonks's face told him how well he had done in trying to get her to drop it.
"Really?" She drawled in an unimpressed voice. Hedwig, at that moment, decided to cuff him on the back of his head with her wing, letting him know what she thought he should do.
"You've turned my owl against me," Harry sent Tonks a mock glare.
"Great minds just think alike," Tonks smirked. "Now, what happened?"
"Lupin," Harry sighed. "I went and had that talk with him."
"Oh," Tonks's eyes lit up with understanding. "I'm guessing it didn't go well."
"Not really, no," Harry shook his head, he bit his bottom lip before continuing. "I asked him, I asked him why he didn't come for me. I wanted to know, why wasn't I living with him? Why hadn't I seen him again before this year? And he told me, I didn't really like his answer. I had to get out of there, I actually forgot to ask some of the other questions I had." Harry frowned, remembering that he hadn't asked Lupin about what that man had been trying to do with Harry's mum.
"What did he say?" Tonks asked softly.
"He gave me his reasons for staying away, they all sounded nice," Harry let out a small breath as he stared at the floor. "Really nice. He couldn't because he wasn't capable, he couldn't because he wasn't allowed and so on and so forth. They sounded great, really, they did."
"Then what's the problem?" Tonks asked.
"What was stopping him from coming to visit me? He couldn't take time to see me once a year?" Harry asked, his jaw tightening. "He couldn't send me a goddamn letter? What was stopping him from coming to see me once I came back to the wizarding world?"
"Have you thought about asking him about this?" Tonks asked him gently. "Maybe he has a reason."
"Maybe he does," Harry picked Hedwig up and gently placed her on a perch. "But I don't want to hear them, because as far as I'm concerned, it's all just a bunch of excuses. A long time ago I learnt a very important lesson and this is just another example of it."
"What lesson would that be?" Tonks frowned.
"You can't count on anyone," Harry told her honestly before he gave her a short nod and started walking away, only to stop when Tonks grabbed his wrist.
"You're wrong, Harry," Tonks told him, her voice confident but soft. "Your life will get better, Harry, just have a little faith. You just got to believe that it'll get better."
"And what if it doesn't?" Asked Harry, staring at her attentively.
"Then you make it get better, be yourself and do what you have to do," She said before she pulled him into a hug. "It'll be alright, you'll see."
"Um...thanks, Tonks." Harry gulped before awkwardly patting her on the back.
'Hmm, maybe there is one person we can count on.' Venom hummed thoughtfully as Tonks continued to hug Harry.
"So," Tonks said as she let go of him. "If you don't mind me asking, why does not living with Lupin upset you? What's wrong with where you're staying?"
"I don't know, what's wrong with where you're staying?" Harry asked, taking a step back.
"I didn't say there was anything wrong with it," Tonks blinked.
"I never said there was anything wrong with where I was staying, either." Harry shrugged before he walked past her. "I'll see you later, Tonks." He called without looking back.
"Boy," Tonks let out a small huff before turning to Hedwig. "Your master is a complicated one, isn't he?" She asked. Hedwig hooted in agreement while nodding her head.