It was during the summer of my 7th grade when my dad took me to Dimapur for a vacation. He had to leave soon after for work, so I stayed at my aunt's place. I was thrilled because I'd signed up for a computer course, something I'd wanted to do for as long as I could remember. Computers fascinated me—they were like a gateway to a whole other world.
In class, I would sit quietly at my desk, listening intently and following every step the instructor gave us. It was exciting to dive into something I loved, but I kept to myself. Shyness held me back, making it hard to talk to my classmates. Most days, I went through each lesson in silence, my focus solely on the screen in front of me. There was, however, one exception.
One day, during a class, a voice beside me broke the silence I was so used to.
"Ashan, could you help me? I forgot how to make the text bigger."
I looked over. It was a girl who sat next to me, someone I'd seen around but hadn't spoken to. I slid my seat over, took the mouse gently, and adjusted the font size.
"It's…done. Like this," I mumbled, feeling my face warm up a little.
"Oh, thanks! I got it now."
I gave a quick nod, not quite sure what else to say, and went back to my work.
After class, as I packed up my notes and got ready to leave, I heard her voice again.
"Ashan, see you tomorrow!"
"Okay…" I replied, a bit surprised but a little pleased too.
Her name was Lilia. She was just a classmate, really, but she was friendly—something I didn't expect, especially since I felt like I didn't quite fit in back then. Despite that, she always greeted me in the morning.
"Good morning, Ashan."
"Morning…"
Most days, she would ask me for help during class, a shy smile on her face as she glanced at her screen. Each time, her questions were small but earnest.
"Ashan, could you help me with this again?"
"Sure…" I'd say, trying to keep my voice steady. Her "thank you" always felt genuine, and somehow, it mattered.
She was sweet, the kind of person who made you feel at ease without trying too hard. I started to look forward to those little moments with her, the times when she'd turn to me with a question.
"I can't move my mouse."
"I don't see the review tab."
"How do we undo that?"
"Thanks for always helping, Ashan. You know so much about this."
I never quite knew how to respond, so I usually just nodded or mumbled something. But each time, it felt like I was a little less alone. By now, I had started to look forward to class in a way I hadn't before.
Eventually, though, I heard a rumor going around—that Lilia was dating a guy from our class. His name was Nara, a good-looking, popular kind of guy. I didn't know how to feel at first. There was a twinge of something, maybe sadness, but I brushed it off. After all, she seemed happy, and that was enough for me. I always wished her the best.
One day, after class had ended, I realized I'd forgotten my notes. I went back to the empty classroom to grab them, and as I was about to leave, I noticed a small group gathered at one of the desks, watching something.
As I walked past the group, I caught a glimpse of their screens and froze. My heart sank. I felt like I'd seen something I wasn't supposed to, something that shouldn't be seen. Trying to stay calm, I headed straight for Nara.
"Hey, Nara, can I borrow your phone for a second?" I asked, doing my best to keep my voice steady.
He looked at me, frowning. "Huh? Why would you want my phone?"
"I just… I thought I saw something, and I want to make sure…" I trailed off, unsure of how to say it. My chest tightened with an uncomfortable urgency that I couldn't shake.
Nara's expression hardened. "Get lost."
I hesitated, but the image I'd glimpsed kept flashing in my mind, too disturbing to ignore. I couldn't just walk away. Taking a deep breath, I tried again. "Please, Nara, just let me see it. I… I have to make sure."
Nara's face twisted into a scowl, and he gave a short, bitter laugh. "So, you're curious, huh? Well, yeah, what you saw was right. It's her picture."
I swallowed, feeling a knot of unease in my stomach. "Then… why is she half-naked in it?"
Nara shrugged carelessly. "So what? She's my girlfriend. She can do whatever she wants."
"But… then why are you showing it around to everyone?" My voice was barely more than a whisper, but I could feel anger creeping up inside me.
He looked at me with a smirk, eyes cold. "That's my business. What, did you want to see her naked, too? You could've just asked."
At that, something in me snapped. I felt a surge of anger, hotter than anything I'd felt before. My fists clenched, my heart pounding. I couldn't believe the way he was talking about her—as if she were just some object to be shown off.
"Delete it," I said, my voice low but firm.
Nara's smirk faded, and he looked at me like I'd lost my mind. "What did you just say?"
"I said, delete that picture." My voice shook, but I didn't back down. "You have no right to keep it… or to show it around like that."
Nara laughed again, mocking. "And what gives you the right, huh? She's my girlfriend."
I took a step closer, staring him down. "I'm someone who actually respects her," I replied, my voice barely controlled. "Delete it. Now."
The anger in my voice surprised even me, but I didn't care. I couldn't stand by and let him treat her like this. Not when she'd been nothing but kind to me. Not when she deserved so much better.
Nara crossed his arms, smirking. "Then make me," he challenged, his voice laced with arrogance.
Without thinking, I reached out, grabbing his wrist, trying to wrest the phone from his hand. But before I could get a good grip, one of his friends shoved me back hard, sending me stumbling to the ground. My hands scraped against the rough floor, stinging as I struggled to get back on my feet.
But I couldn't just let this go. The thought of him keeping those pictures, of showing them off to others, was too much. I lunged again, managing to grab the phone this time. But before I could do anything, a sharp pain shot through my stomach as Nara's fist drove into my gut. I doubled over, gasping, the wind knocked out of me. It felt like I'd been hit by a truck, and I collapsed to my knees, struggling to breathe.
"Stop that, you stupid shit," Nara sneered, standing over me. "You think you're some kind of hero? This isn't even the first time I've done this." He leaned in closer, lowering his voice to a taunting whisper. "And if you keep quiet about it, I can send you a lot more of her pictures. Hell, I could even make a video and send it to you."
Hearing that, something inside me snapped. All my thoughts, the small hopes I'd had for Lilia's happiness, the sweetness she'd shown me—everything was swallowed up in a red-hot rage. I could barely think; all I knew was that I couldn't let him keep talking about her like that.
I clenched my fist and, without a second thought, swung it straight into Nara's face. The satisfying crack of impact echoed in my ears as he staggered back, momentarily stunned. His friends moved in quickly, grabbing my arms, but I twisted free, my anger fueling me beyond anything I'd ever felt.
I tackled Nara, sending us both crashing to the ground, and before he could react, I punched him again, hard, aiming for his smug, mocking face. I didn't stop. I couldn't stop. All the pent-up frustration, the helplessness I'd felt, poured out as I hit him again and again. His friends tried to pull me off, but I shrugged them off, my vision blurring as I continued to throw punches.
Somewhere in the distance, I could hear shouting, the sound of footsteps growing louder. But it was all background noise, muffled under the relentless rhythm of my heartbeat pounding in my ears. I couldn't see anything but Nara and the twisted, ugly sneer that had been on his face.
Suddenly, strong arms pulled me back, and I found myself struggling against them, still burning with fury. It wasn't until I blinked, my vision clearing, that I realized teachers had entered the room, their faces a mix of shock and anger.
"That's enough!" one of them shouted, holding me firmly by the shoulders. "What's going on here?"
I looked down, breathing heavily, my fists throbbing. Nara lay on the ground, his face bruised , looking more shocked than hurt. The realization of what I'd done hit me
Before I could even respond, one of Nara's friends jumped in, saying loudly, "Ma'am, Ahsan just started hitting Nara out of nowhere. Nara didn't even try to fight back, but Ahsan just kept swinging."
I stood there, stunned, unable to believe what I was hearing. The lies rolled off their tongues so easily, like they were rehearsed, like they'd been waiting for this moment. My mind raced, still reeling from the adrenaline, unable to string together the words to defend myself.
The teacher's eyes bore into me, her face stern and unforgiving. "Why did you do that, Ahsan? Explain yourself, now!"
But before I could even form a sentence, Nara's other friend chimed in. "Ma'am, it's because Ahsan got jealous. Nara was close to Lilia, and Ahsan told him to stay away from her… then he just started hitting him."
Jealous? What were they even talking about? They're twisting everything... lying right in front of me, with no shame. I could barely process their words, my mind a chaotic swirl of frustration, disbelief, and… hurt. Each lie they told chipped away at something inside me. Did they even feel a sliver of shame for what they were doing?
My thoughts blurred together, but my voice was still gone, strangled by the disbelief and anger pulsing through me. I felt the teacher's grip tighten on my arm as she led me out of the classroom. I tried to protest, to say something—anything—but she silenced me with a single, dismissive look.
Sitting in the office, I glanced over at Nara. He was smirking quietly, eyes cast downward, not even looking at me. My stomach twisted as I thought about how this was all playing out. I thought I'd done the right thing, tried to stop him from hurting someone, and yet… here I was, feeling like I was on trial for a crime I hadn't committed.
A few moments later, my aunt arrived. Relief flickered through me at the sight of her—maybe she'd listen, maybe she'd understand. But as she stepped closer, I noticed her expression. Her face was tight with anger. And before I could say a word, her hand came down across my cheek and slapped me.
The sting burned across my skin, and I felt my chest tighten. The impact wasn't just physical; it shook something inside me. She was supposed to help, to believe me. But here she was, judging me without hearing a single word of my side.
"Ashan, why would you do this?" Her voice was sharp, laced with disappointment. "Why did you have to hurt someone over this? Don't you feel any shame?"
"Aunty, it's not what you think—it's just that Nara—"
"Stop," she cut me off, her tone final. "I put you in this course because you were interested, not to fight over some girl. Do you even realize how ashamed your parents will feel when they hear about this?"
I opened my mouth to try again, but no words came. I felt trapped, like I was screaming in my mind but no one could hear. Everything I'd done to try to help Lilia felt meaningless in that moment, like it had all been twisted into something ugly and shameful.
My aunt pulled me up by my arm. "Say sorry to Nara, right now."
I shook my head weakly, but the resistance in me was fading. I'd already tried to explain, tried to make her understand, but nothing got through. "No… I won't…"
"What?" Her grip tightened painfully on my arm, and she pulled me closer, her voice low and cold. "Say sorry, right now, or I'll tell your parents exactly what kind of shameful thing you've done."
I looked away, feeling a lump forming in my throat. How had it come to this? Why was no one willing to listen to me?
"Ahsan!" Her voice snapped, breaking my silence. "Say it."
I swallowed, my voice barely a whisper. "I'm sorry, Nara…"
She wasn't satisfied. "Say it properly. Say sorry for hitting him and promise you won't do it again."
I forced the words out, feeling each one scrape against my pride. "I'm sorry, Nara… for hitting you… and I won't do it again."
There was a silence that settled over the room as I finally looked up. Nara remained quiet, avoiding my gaze, but the small smirk tugging at his mouth was enough to confirm that he'd won.
In that moment, I felt completely alone.