I can still remember the gentle breeze whispering throughout downtown, carrying the faint scent of cherry blossoms and laughter. The streets were bustling with people, their faces a blur of motion and color. Everything felt as if I had stepped into a world painted in with richer hues and sharper lines. Beside me a girl walked; her long light brunette hair flowed behind her, catching the golden light from the city lights. Though I couldn't see her face clearly, I felt a deep unspoken connection to her. Her hand was warm and firm, pulling me gently but insistently through the crowd.
"Come on, we have to keep moving or we will be late," she said, her voice soft and melodic, blending seamlessly with the city's symphony.
We weaved through the throngs of people, her hand guiding me through the maze of streets of Hanaichi Plaza. We took a sharp turn in a very narrow alley. The noise of the city started to fade away, I could not even hear the soft whisper of the wind passing through. My heart was racing. Suddenly, the city lights blurred around us, transforming into a dance of shadows and luminance. The cobblestone beneath our feet to the distant neon sign from a small restaurant flickered in the dusk. I felt her arms wrapped around me, pulling me into a tight embrace. Her warmth surrounded me and for a moment, everything stays stilled. My heart pounded as I try to hug her back but for some reason my whole body was turned to stone. As we stood there, The dream began to waver. Her grip started to loosen, and the world began to be dissolved into mist. I called out to her, but I couldn't hear her response. The scene melted away, pulling me back towards reality. A loud sound echoed into my ear like if it was a million woodpeckers drilling into my brain. I fell to the ground, opened my eyes and looked at my alarm clock. It was 06:35AM.
My name is Aoki Kaito, and I am a first-year student at Hoshizora High School. As I walk the streets of my neighborhood to get to school, I happen to notice students from other classes being accompanied by others. Some were laughing, some were talking, and others were holding hands. This got me thinking about what my parents said during my first day of school.
"High school are the best years of one's life, a place where you can forge friendships, create cherished memories, and most importantly find love." They spoke.
In reality, this is nothing more than a comforting lie. Rather more, high school feels more like a monarchy than a meritocracy, ruled by three pillars. Academics being the third pillar that holds this monarchy, while seemingly the most objective, is an area where the pressure to excel can feel suffocating. Grades become a currency of self-worth and a ticket to opportunities, turning education into a competitive race to see who can make it to the top by any means necessary. Sports serves as the second pillar of this cruel society. It is seen as the heart of the school spirit and community. Athletes are treated as royalty, their victories celebrated as if they were the achievements of the entire student body. Yet, for those who aren't athletically inclined, sports can be a realm of exclusion, where the worth is measured by your physical abilities rather than your character. The emphasis on athletic prowess creates a narrow definition of success and belonging, sidelining those who find their passions elsewhere.
This leads the last pillar, which is the worse of them even if you combined them together. I am talking about pillar number one. Popularity. This pillar can dictate who you associate with, where you sit, and even how teachers perceive you. It's a game with unwritten rules, where being popular means being seen, heard, and often envied. This social currency often requires conformity to certain behaviors and appearances, leaving those who fit the mold, on the outskirts of this invisible hierarchy. In this landscape, genuine connections are rare, and the pressure to conform is overwhelming. For someone like me, who prefers the quiet corners of the school library over noisy cafeteria, school life feels less like a journey of self-discover and more like a series of tests on how well you can fit into the established order. As I arrived at my classroom 1-2, I took a final breath before opening the doors to see what life throws at me today. The usual buzz of morning chatter greeted me, but my attention was immediately drawn to a small huddle of girls surrounding the desk in front of mine. My seat was in the back of the classroom, a place I preferred for its relative anonymity. As I made my way towards my desk, I noticed a girl I never seen before sitting on top of it. She had an air of confidence, her posture relaxed and her eyes sparkling with mischief. I hesitated, then mustered the courage to speak.
"Um, excuse me, can you please...?" My voice came out softer than I intended, and she didn't seem to hear me. She looked up and grinned, clearly amused by my discomfort.
"Oh, sorry" she said, not moving. "I didn't know this was someone's seat. You must be...?" She let the question hang, her eyes twinkling with amusement.
"Ah, it's... it's mine" I stammered, feeling my face heat up. Before I could say more, the girl who sits in front of me intervened.
"Hey, get off his desk" she said firmly, her tone protective.
"Alright, alright, I'm getting off Takabayashi. I didn't know you had a little boyfriend. When were you going to tell us." she said, in a playful expression while sliding off the desk.
"Hey, don't even start with me. I don't have any time of relationship with him. S... so... don't pu... puu... put words in my… yy... mouth." Takabayashi said in a nervous tone. As I locked eyes with her, she quickly turned away looking blush.
"Ah, look someone is blushing too hard. Yeah, look at her she so red. I think we finally found out who the mystery guy is." The girl said along with the other girls joining in. One of them hugging Takabayashi from the back joining the teasing.
The mystery girl turned back towards me once more, her eyes sparkling with a mix of relief and amusement. "So, you're not Takabayashi's mystery man, huh?" she mused, a playful smile curling on her lips. She leaned in just a little, her voice dropping to a more intimate tone, "What a relief, I don't want you to be anyone's mystery man other than mine."
She delivered the line with a wink and a soft laugh, leaving a lingering sense of intrigue and ambiguity. As she turned away to join her friends, I felt a rush of confusion and curiosity, her words echoing in my mind and leaving me to wonder what she truly meant. As the day progressed, I found myself unable to concentrate, my thoughts constantly drifting back to the strange encounter with that girl. By the time lunch arrived, I needed a break from the noise and chaos. I headed to my usual refuge, the school library, hoping for some peace and quiet. But as I entered, I spotted the girl from earlier sitting at a table, flipping through a book. She looked up as I walked in, her dead eyes locking onto mine. She gave me a smile then went back to reading her book. I quickly rushed to the first aisle of the library. I felt a sudden rushed of nerves, my face heating up again. Why was I so flustered? As I picked up one of Dazai books of the shelf, I happened to notice her through the shelf. There she was reading the book she got, but in reality, she was using the book as a cover to secretly use her phone. Annoyed, I felt anger for some reason and without a second thought I confronted her. When I approached, she looked up and had a calm face, her eyes locked onto mine once more. As I try to speak, my words stumbled over each other.
"Uh, you... you shouldn't use a book for that type of purpose" I managed to say, pointing awkwardly at her phone. She gave me a smile. She gestured me to come over.
Reluctantly I sat down, feeling acutely aware of how I was sitting beside her. She leaned in slightly, a teasing smile on her lips. "You're really cute when you shy, Kai-chan."
I looked away, my face burning. "If you're going to use a book, you should use them properly" I muttered, feeling a sure of courage. Her expression shifted briefly to one of surprised, and for a moment, she seemed genuinely taken aback.
"Why do you even care so much about books?" she asked, a curious tilt to her head. "Why give them the same value as a human life?"
Her questioned struck a chord, and without thinking I replied, "Books gives us a second life. They allow us to experience worlds beyond our own, to live through stories and emotions crafted by the author. They have the power to change us, to make us feel things we never thought possible." My voice gained strength as I spoke, but then I noticed her wide-eyed expression and realized I'd been too earnest. Embarrassed, I quickly looked down, "Sorry, I didn't' mean to... go on like that."
She reached out and gently lifted my chin with her hand, forcing me to look at her. Her touch was warm, and it made my heart race. For a moment, everything seemed to go silent, even the hum of the air conditioning faded into the background. We were face to face, close enough that I could see the sublte details in her eyes.
"Is that so?" she mummered, a thoughtful look crossing her face. "Then I guess I need to reevaluate this word "living". Isn't that right Kai-Chan?" Her words were soft, almost intimate, and I felt a strange mix of emotions swirling inside me. Before I could respond, her phone rang. She glanced at the screen and sighed.
"I have to go now" she said, standing up. As she reached the door, she turned back and smiled. "This was a lovely chat. I hope we can continue this some other time."
Just as she was about to leave, I found my voice. "Wait! What's... your name?"
She took a brief paused, turned around with the same playful smile, and placed her finger on her lips, as if to say she wouldn't tell. Then without another word, she stepped out and closed the door behind her. I stood there, replaying the encounter in my mind. After the library encounter, I returned to my classes, attempting to shift my focus back to the school day. The afternoon proceeded with a familiar rhythm, though I couldn't entirely shake off the unsettling feeling she left me with. In math class, I tried to pay attention to the lesson on quadratic equations, but the numbers seemed to blur together. It was one of those days where everything felt slightly off-kitter, like a puzzle with a missing piece. History class was no different, with its endless lists of dates and events that seemed to drag on. I found myself staring at the clock often, willing the hands to move faster. It was a subject I usually enjoyed, but today the stories of the past couldn't hold my interests. My mind wandered to mundane things- what was for dinner, how I am going to beat this new game I bought, and her. During English, the teacher discussed a classic novel, dissecting its theme and symbolism. Normally, I'd be engaged in the discussion, eager to delve into the literary analysis. But today, I was just going through the motions, taking notes mechanically without much thought. The bell rang, snapping me out of my stupor, and I packed my things, relieved the day was finally over.
As the teacher was telling us which chapters to read before dismissing us, I felt a strange sense of detachment, as I was merely a spectator in my own life. I exited the school building; the cool breeze welcomed me from the stuffy classroom air. As I walked towards the gate, I recalled a quote from the great author Daiza: "School is not just a place for learning; it's a microcosm of life, filled with its own dramas, triumphs, and failures." This quote resonated with me as I took in the everyday scenes around me: students chatting, cars passing by, and the dogs barking. It felt like a miniature world, complete with its own set of rules and social hierarchies. Lost in thought, I noticed a convenience store to my left. Feeling a bit parched, I decided to go in and buy a drink. The store's fluorescent lights contrasted sharply with the outside world, making the brief moment feel almost dreamlike. I paid for my drink and stepped back outside, the door chime signaling my return to reality. As I sipped my purchased, I saw the girl from the library, accompanied by a few other girls that I don't recognize. They were talking about a boy from class 2-3 as I am walking by. She noticed me and left the group to approach me with that familiar playful smile.
"Isn't this a surprise. What are you doing here? "She said with a light and teasing tone.
Caught off guard, I stammered, "Uh, nothing, just getting a drink."
I mustered the courage to excuse myself. " I should get going" I said awkwardly, but before I could walk away, she inquired further, "Do you live around here?"
I nodded, feeling a bit nervous. Aya turned to the girls she was with and announced, " I'll walk with him from here on out" the girls exchanged puzzled looks while I stood there, embarrassed and confused. Aya wrapped her arm around mine and waved goodbye to her friends as we started walking. As we walked, I couldn't help but ask, "Why did you do that? Aren't they your friends?"
She looked at me, her cheerful demeanor softening into something more sincere. 'Yes, but I wanted to walk with you. Is it so wrong for me to want that?' Her voice was soft, yet there was an undeniable intensity in her eyes, as if she had been holding onto those words for longer than I could have imagined.
Her words caught me off guard. I wasn't sure how to respond, the simplicity of her statement leaving me momentarily speechless. Before I could gather my thoughts, she sprinted ahead, then stopped and turned to face me. "Why don't you have any friends?" she asked, her tone curious.
I hesitated, then replied, "What does the word 'friendship' even mean? Is it a word use to create a bond with individuals, sharing your deepest thoughts, trusting them with your vulnerabilities? Or is it a facade, a scheme where people get close to you, learn everything about you: secrets, regrets, dreams, and most importantly... weaknesses, only for them to use them against you in the end." I continued, my tone growing more intense. "In my experience, what people call 'friendship' can be a dangerous illusion. It's like handing someone a key to your life, not knowing if they'll safeguard it or use it to harm you. So, I guess, like you I've learned to be wary of those who claim to be friends. I paused, then added, "But you're different. You have friends left and right. It's easy for someone like you to dismiss them as just classmates because, unlike me, you've never really needed anyone."
The girl seemed momentarily caught off guard by my response, her eyes widening slightly in surprise. But after a brief pause, her smile returned, softer this time, as we continued walking side by side. Eventually, we reached a point where the street splits into three different routes. She stopped and turned to me saying, "I guess this is where we part ways." As she took the far-left path, she looked back and said, "See you tomorrow, Okay." her voice light.
Feeling a mix of embarrassment and curiosity, I stood there unsure how to respond. Just as she was about to disappear down the path, I called out, "Wha...wh...what...what's your name?"
She paused, not turning around, and replied," Rōzu...Aya." Then, without another word, she started to run, leaving me standing there, confused and intrigued.
As I walked down my own path, my mind was in a whirlwind of thoughts about her. "Rōzu Aya" I repeated to myself, letting the name roll off my tongue. "Rōzu Aya." Each repetition seemed to add a new layer of significance to her presence. I took a deep breathe, then exhaled slowly and said, " colorful...rose."