Chapter 267: Wifi is…?
"Ehehehe!"
"My cowardly hubby, I haven't seen you in such a pitiful form for a long time."
"I couldn't care less."
As soon as I heard about network connectivity from Miss Trainee, I immediately tried my luck with Sieg's smartphone.
In the end, I succeeded!
I didn't know how realistic it was to connect to Earth's communication network from the Fantasy World, but the message stating "successful network connection" on the screen was real.
"Ha, there are only 7 missed calls and SMS."
Six of them were from a contact signed as "Mom," and the last was a text message from the police station that said, "Please contact us as soon as you see this text."
And after just a minute…
A farewell message came from the cellular company, which politely said: "We feel terrible for having to say goodbye to one of our dear clients because of their unmet payment responsibilities. Best wishes!"
Sieg had been stuck in the Fantasy dimension for quite some time.
He had been here shorter than me, but his stay here would still be about nine Earth years. Surprisingly, however, the only person who was worried about his disappearance was "mom."
"Such a sad life he used to live."
"All social outcasts are like that."
On the other hand, locals of Fantasy showed interest in such people, giving them warm looks and smiles so they could then use them for free.
They always told them they were the chosen Hero.
After being abducted into Fantasy World and being told to "defeat the Demon Lord," anyone with common sense would give them false hope by saying, "please leave this to me," before coming up with an escape plan.
However, as seen from Sieg's 1st round, social outcasts were often hungry for love and could be brainwashed with just a little attention.
"What about you?"
"I was an exemplary inhabitant of the Earth, well adapted to life in society."
It was impossible to prove this right now because I didn't have my phone in my hands during the spatial movement, but it probably had hundreds of missed calls and messages by now.
Ssosia looked at me doubtfully.
"What? Is it that unbelievable?"
"Hmm… This, of course, is not an absolute criterion, but heroes are mainly chosen from high school students who aren't happy with their current life and are eager to escape. Therefore, summoning a hero is considered an invitation, not a kidnapping. You were probably dissatisfied with society or your environment.
"No."
"Think hard."
"I was doing fine."
"Really?"
"Really."
I answered my distrustful wife and sprawled on the bed, fiddling with my smartphone.
First, I installed the messenger.
I was a little nervous because my messenger account might have been blocked, considering my citizen registration number was canceled due to my disappearance. Everything remained perfectly fine, though, so I was glad.
Then the corners of my lips lifted.
"Look, cowardly wife. This is what your husband is like."
"Is this some kind of illusion?"
"That's impossible."
"But this doesn't make sense. More than 300 people are waiting for you on Earth… Huh? Wait a minute! Why are high-ranking people like presidents and prime ministers looking for you?"
"Well…"
When I had the opportunity to breathe in the polluted air of my hometown for a bit, I used Dark Energy and recruited followers to protect my parents.
Ssosia stared at me with an odd expression on her face.
"My husband… are you a Demon Lord to the core?"
"Stop talking nonsense and give me back my smartphone. And make a charger for it. You're an engineer who can even create lightsabers, aren't you?"
"Don't make things up. It's not as easy as it sounds. There is no infrastructure here. I also have no idea what the charger you need looks like."
"So you need a sample?"
Sieg didn't have a charger. However, there had to be at least a few students abducted into Fantasy who had one with them.
But there was one more problem.
"Oh… These are ancient technologies that use electricity, not magic. You will need a generator and an adapter to change the voltage."
"Generator…"
Magical engineering, the mainstream developmental technique of wizards and dwarves in Fantasy, used magical power.
While this world benefited from flush toilets since it accelerated the development of civilizations, its basic structure hadn't changed.
Ssosia decided to put an end to it, saying, "I'm sorry to disappoint you, but I'm a programmer, not an engineer. I graduated in software engineering from the Mollan Academy, one of the most prestigious universities in the world. I received my second class software engineering degree from the planet El Molando. I don't know how to create mechanisms, but I work well with them."
"I'm very disappointed!"
"You could've said my expertise is enough instead, my dastardly husband…"
"How could you deceive your husband like that? What about the lightsaber?"
"Mollan made it."
"Mollan~" The greatest creature to ever exist was naturally capable of solving the most difficult situations. He swayed from side to side in surprise.
"Is that so…"
I didn't even need to be convinced that Master Mollan had the ability to do that.
He was so omnipotent that even my demented senior, the ruler of the galaxy, couldn't rebel against him.
"Mollan can copy everything he swallowed once. The local Mollans of El Molando all have first-class software engineering diplomas, can create whole worlds, and aren't limited to duplication, but those are first-class Mollans living on their home planet. Unlike them, my Mollan is a gift from a friend. He doesn't have a diploma…"
"Ha! Master Mollan doesn't need a diploma!"
One's skills and the presence of a diploma in their arsenal weren't always directly proportional.
I wasn't an orthopedic surgeon who graduated from medical school, but I was confident that I could easily treat my spine.
"Anyway, he can copy this smartphone if you want."
"Hmm…"
Master Mollan, who controlled the entire universe, shouldn't be bothered by his pitiful apprentice.
"Can he copy its battery?"
"It would be useless. Mollan can't create a charge."
Even though Sieg's smartphone wasn't used frequently, its battery was still already almost empty.
I found "mother" in the contact list of my messenger.
I found messages from her from ten years ago.
□ Mother: Stop fooling around, come home. (16:32)
□ Mother: Son, don't try your mother's patience ^^. (17:01)
□ Mother: Do you want me to nail you? (17:35)
"Well…"
It seemed I had been granted a death sentence only an hour after I went missing. And now ten years had passed …
I wanted to read all the messages from her, but the phone's battery was almost dead.
Hence, I scrolled through everything and went to the last ones:
□ Mother: Son, you're very lucky ^^. (8:04)
□ Mother: My daughter-in-law is very sweet and capable. (8:05)
□ Mother: Come back soon. I want to have a grandson. (23:46)
Daughter-in-law?
I had been married twice, the unofficial one included.
Being a sweet emperor at the age of 3, I voluntarily bonded with the Sword Princess, and then I fell for the cunning tricks of the Demon Lord Pedonar, who foisted his daughter Ssosia on me.
But it wasn't on Earth, and I never introduced them to my mother.
I quickly typed down and sent my replies.
□ Me: I'm fine. (5:26)
□ Me: It will take a little longer to get back. (5:26)
□ Me: I love you very much. (5:26)
□ Me: By the way, I don't see any messages from Father. (5:26)
□ Me: Tell him I'm upset. (5:26)
□ Me: And what daughter-in-law are you talking about? (5:26)
□ Me: Don't trust scammers. (5:26)
I wanted to know the scammer's identity who pretended to be my wife, but unfortunately, it was 5 AM in my hometown on Earth.
The battery had died out, and the smartphone had turned off before my mother could even reply.
"Damn it! I sent just a few messages, but the battery immediately died!"
Now this smartphone was as useless as a brick despite the presence of a network.
"Who's the daughter-in-law your mother was talking about, my cowardly hubby?"
"I have no idea."
At the time, I was an exemplary high school student. I didn't have time to hang out with the opposite sex. Not to mention getting married…
It was ridiculous.
"I just want to make sure. Is your family rich?"
"No."
My family was financially average, and the only fact we could be proud of was that we lived without loans and debts.
"I mean, at least she's not talking to your parents to siphon off money."
"Ssosia, what are you getting at?"
"I'm just really surprised. I must also apologize. I have come to the conclusion that I was wrong about you being a social outcast. I couldn't even imagine you're capable of keeping a relationship with a girl who, even after ten years since your disappearance, still can't forget you and is still waiting for you."
"Now you understand? You should be grateful that such a popular guy married you."
"I will only say this once. I am grateful."
Ssosia, who was lying next to me, smiled brightly.
"Ahem… First, we need to somehow solve the charging problem."
I needed to get my smartphone working again to hear from my mother about the woman who claimed to be my wife on Earth.
It was hard for civilized people to live in this world.
At that moment…
"I returned as soon as I received news that Your Majesty has returned! Would you like to hold the meeting that was postponed indefinitely now?" A man's voice came from the entrance of the throne room.
I knew who it was.
Demon Grand Duke B.
Grand Duke A received his title from the Demon Lord Pedonar, who endowed him with Dark Energy, but Grand Duke B had real talent and rose to his current position solely through his own efforts.
But that was the scenario of the 4th curriculum.
When the Demon Lord changed, a lot changed about the world as well.
Grand Duke A no longer existed since no one gave him this title.
But things were different with Grand Duke B, so he was present here.
He was also one of the few demons who stayed with the Demon Lord after losing all of his territories and being surrounded by a human army.
"Another meeting? Yes, it must be done."
My clones were very passive. Therefore, like the Demon Lord Pedonar, all they did was sit on the throne and waited endlessly.
They just waited for the Hero's arrival.
However, it was quite possible to perform simple actions, with the exception of battles.
An example would be giving orders to demon subjects.
"Oh! Your Majesty! Congratulations on your resurrection!"
Grand Duke B bowed before me with tears of happiness in his eyes.
"Grand Duke B."
"Right. Let me introduce myself…"
"Grand Duke B."
"Yes, Your Majesty! Call me whatever you like!"
Exhausting Dark Energy, as my father-in-law did, I, along with the rest of the copies, majestically proclaimed:
"I, Parmamon, the MAX-Class Demon Lord, command all high-ranking demons to answer my call. The time has come to punish humanity for the arrogance they now display after experiencing the comfort of flush toilets!"
All heroes' smartphones would be mine!