I closed the door to my room and leaned back against it, feeling a mixture of nervous energy and doubt coursing through my veins.
The walls seemed to close in on me, their familiar shapes almost foreign in the dim light. I knew this night out with Nathaniel was a distraction one I wasn't even sure I wanted. But somehow, I had agreed to it.
Sighing, I pushed myself away from the door and crossed the room to the small mirror hanging on the wall. My reflection stared back at me, and I studied the faint dark circles under my eyes, the slight tremor in my hands.
I couldn't remember the last time I had felt this… uncertain. Usually, I knew exactly what I wanted, but tonight was different. Tonight, I was teetering on the edge of something I didn't fully understand.
I brushed my hair back, smoothing it down, and turned to the wardrobe, pulling it open. My fingers grazed the fabric of my clothes, feeling the soft textures of silks and linens. What was I even supposed to wear? Nathaniel hadn't said much about where we were going, only that it would be "fun."
I grabbed a dark, flowing dress simple yet elegant, with a low neckline and long sleeves that hugged my arms. It wasn't too revealing, but it was enough to make a statement. I needed the confidence, or at least the illusion of it.
As I slipped into the dress, the fabric felt cool against my skin, a contrast to the warmth rising in my cheeks.
I caught my reflection again, adjusting the sleeves, smoothing the fabric over my hips. I wasn't sure if I looked the part of someone ready for a night out or if I looked like someone trying too hard. But it would have to do.
I added a touch of makeup just enough to make my eyes stand out, a hint of color to my lips. I paused, staring at my reflection again.
Would Ciara be jealous? Would she even care? I shook my head, pushing the thought away. Tonight wasn't about her. Tonight was supposed to be about forgetting her.
A knock sounded at the door, and I jumped, my heart skipping a beat. I took a deep breath and opened it, finding Nathaniel leaning casually against the doorframe, a crooked smile on his lips.
He was dressed in a dark, tailored jacket that seemed to make his green eyes even more intense, his hair artfully tousled in that way that suggested he didn't care but probably spent a good amount of time making it look like that.
"Wow," he said, his gaze sweeping over me with an appreciative gleam. "You clean up nicely."
I felt a flush creeping up my neck, and I fought the urge to roll my eyes. "Is that supposed to be a compliment?" I asked, my voice tinged with amusement despite myself.
He grinned. "It's whatever you want it to be, Aeliana," he replied. "Shall we?"
I nodded, swallowing the lump in my throat, and stepped out into the hallway. Nathaniel offered his arm with a flourish, and I hesitated for a second before taking it.
His touch was warm, his grip firm but not forceful. There was a confidence about him, a self-assuredness that was both irritating and… oddly comforting.
We made our way down the winding corridors, the sound of our footsteps echoing off the stone walls. The castle felt different at night more alive, somehow.
Shadows danced along the walls, and the air seemed to hum with a quiet energy. I could feel Nathaniel's gaze on me as we walked, but I kept my eyes ahead, focusing on the path.
"So, where are we going?" I asked, trying to sound casual.
He chuckled softly. "It's a surprise," he said. "But I promise, it'll be worth it."
I shot him a sideways glance. "You're really enjoying this, aren't you?"
"Maybe a little," he admitted, his grin widening. "But come on, Aeliana. Loosen up. This is supposed to be fun."
I sighed but felt a reluctant smile tugging at my lips. "I'm trying," I muttered.
We stepped out into the cool night air, the sky above a deep canvas of stars. Nathaniel led me toward a sleek, black carriage waiting near the entrance.
The horses stamped their hooves impatiently, their breath visible in the chill. A demon driver sat at the front, holding the reins loosely, his eyes glowing faintly in the dark.
Nathaniel opened the door and gestured for me to step inside. "After you."
I climbed in, the interior plush with velvet cushions and the faint scent of something floral lingering in the air. Nathaniel followed, settling beside me with an ease that seemed second nature to him.
The carriage lurched forward, and I felt a slight flutter in my stomach, a mix of excitement and apprehension.
The city lights blurred past us, the streets alive with the distant sounds of laughter and music. It was a stark contrast to the quiet, oppressive atmosphere I'd been feeling all day.
Nathaniel leaned back, one arm draped casually across the back of the seat. "You know," he said, his tone light, "you're allowed to have fun, Aeliana. You don't always have to be so serious."
I glanced at him, raising an eyebrow. "I'm not always serious," I replied defensively.
He chuckled. "Could have fooled me."
I shook my head, a small smile creeping onto my lips despite myself. "Maybe I just don't know what fun looks like anymore."
He nodded thoughtfully, as if considering my words. "Maybe," he said. "But tonight, let's change that."
The carriage pulled to a stop, and Nathaniel jumped out, offering his hand to help me down. I took it, feeling a strange mix of steadiness and uncertainty.
He led me down a narrow alleyway, and for a moment, I felt a flicker of doubt. Where were we going?
But then we emerged into a lively square, filled with laughter and music. Lanterns hung from strings overhead, casting a warm, golden glow over the crowd.
There was a band playing in one corner, their instruments a vibrant mix of strings and percussion that made my heart beat a little faster. Stalls lined the square, selling everything from exotic foods to handcrafted trinkets.
Nathaniel turned to me, a triumphant grin on his face. "See? Told you it would be worth it."
I couldn't help but smile back, feeling some of the tension in my chest ease just a little. "It's… nice," I admitted. "I didn't expect this."
He shrugged. "I have my moments," he said, guiding me through the crowd. "Come on, let's find something to drink."
We made our way to a small bar at the edge of the square, the smell of spiced wine and roasted meats filling the air.
Nathaniel ordered us both a drink, and we found a spot near the edge of the crowd, watching as people danced and laughed around us. I felt a strange mix of exhilaration and unease, like I was on the verge of something I couldn't quite define.
Nathaniel leaned closer, his voice low. "See? Isn't this better than brooding alone in your room?"
I took a sip of my drink, the warmth of it spreading through me. "Maybe," I conceded, feeling a reluctant smile tugging at my lips.
He laughed, a deep, genuine sound that made me relax a little more. We spent the next hour wandering through the stalls, sampling food, and watching street performers.
I found myself laughing more than I had in days, the tension in my chest loosening bit by bit. Nathaniel was easy to be around, his carefree demeanor infectious.
For a moment, I allowed myself to forget about Ciara, about the confusion and doubt.
But as the night wore on, I could feel Nathaniel's gaze lingering on me longer, his touch becoming a little more lingering.
I tried to ignore it, tried to focus on the present, but I couldn't shake the feeling that there was something more behind his easy smile.
Finally, as we stood at the edge of the square, watching the crowd begin to thin, he turned to me, his expression more serious. "Aeliana," he began, his voice softer, "I'm glad you came out tonight. I think… I think we could be good for each other."
I looked at him, my heart beginning to race. "Nathaniel…"
He stepped closer, his hand reaching out to brush a strand of hair from my face. "I mean it," he murmured. "You're special, Aeliana. More than you know."
I felt a strange mix of emotions stirring inside me—flattery, confusion, and a lingering doubt. "Nathaniel, I—"
Before I could finish, he leaned in, his lips moving closer to mine. For a split second, I froze, caught off guard by the suddenness of it. But then, instinctively, I pulled back, stepping away from him.
"Nathaniel… no," I said, my voice firm, though my heart was pounding. "I can't."
He stopped, his expression shifting from surprise to something unreadable. "I… I'm sorry," he said quickly, holding up his hands. "I didn't mean to—"
"It's fine," I interrupted, trying to steady my breathing. "I just… I'm not ready for this."
He nodded, looking slightly embarrassed. "Of course," he said, his voice softer. "I didn't mean to push you. I just… thought…"
I shook my head, feeling a mix of regret and relief. "It's okay," I said, more gently. "Let's just… leave it here, okay?"
Nathaniel nodded again, his smile returning, though it was a little more subdued this time. "Sure," he said. "Whatever you want, Aeliana."
But as I turned away, I couldn't help but feel that familiar flicker of doubt again, wondering if I had made the right choice—or if I had only complicated things further