Kola was whispering something into Rita's ear and she was laughing. They both smiled when they saw me. Seeing them together made me think to myself: I would not break up my two favorite people.
"'I am as shocked as you are that Wole knows you, " Rita said. I was confused for a moment and then it clicked. Kola's full name was Kolawole.
"So you replaced me with Rita abi?" Kola joked.
"I could ask you the same thing" I returned.
"Touche."
"You know, Wole actually told me his full name but as I used Wole often, I didn't think much about the Kola part. It just didn't come to my mind that it would be your Kola".
"Well Kola is all yours now. I am happy for the both of you"
"Awwwn, now I feel bad"
"Dont worry about me, I'll be fine. I just need to rest for now. We'll talk later Rita."
"Alright -"
Click. I closed the door in their faces and went back to sleep. But sleep did not come.
I had always admired the bro code between guy friends who had feelings for the same girl. They would both leave the girl or one would give way for the other. I decided that I would do the same. I would leave Kola for Rita. It wasn't a big deal as I would have done so even if she wasn't my best friend. But inside I was hurting. Finally, I cried myself to sleep.
The next day, Rita came over. "I know how much you love Kola. I love him too but not like you. I think I'll leave him. I'll ask him if-" "Don't try it! Kola's feelings are not mutual. There's no need to ruin a perfectly good relationship. "
"Then don't freak out when you hear what I'm about to tell you."
"What is it?"
"He asked me to marry him. Yesterday. After we left."
"Its settled then. I will be your maid of honor. End of discussion. "
Rita was moved to tears.
"You're a wonderful person. The sister I never had. "
"That makes two of you." I chuckled under my breath.
The wedding preparations began sooner than I expected. A part of me began to hope something would happen and the wedding would not take place. Another part of me wished they wouldn't break up because of me. But the wedding happened and it was a success.
For some reason, he didn't kiss the bride, even though one or two persons shouted "kiss her". I was relieved when that was over. But jealousy welled up in my heart again when they had the couple's dance.
I excused myself to take some fresh air and almost ran into some guy who was hurrying somewhere. He apologized profusely and rushed on. I suddenly felt alone and decided to do something I did once in a while when I felt sad - write poetry.
By the time I finished writing it, the floor was already open for others to dance with the couple and I sat down waiting for it to be over, when suddenly Rita came towards me and dragged me to the dance floor. I ignored Kola completely and danced with Rita instead. Kola too kept away from me.
At the end of the party, I fished out my poem and put it in an envelope collected from one of the waiters . Then I gave it to Kola. I felt stupid afterwards. I had given it to him out of habit. He had always read my sad poems and this was my saddest yet. The more I thought of it, the more I regretted giving it to him. I didn't want him to feel bad. When I got home I thought about the poem. It went thus:
AT WAR WITH LOVE
If I ever see you again
Don't you dare look
If our paths ever ever cross
Block it with a big bamboo
Because I don't want to love
I don't want this feeling
If it'd only make me more lonely
If we would only need a glance
to whisper words unsaid
Then I don't want to see
I don't want to see my sadness
in your eyes
I want to see my love
But it doesn't matter
because I don't want to love
What's the point
when it can't be returned?
If we never never talk
And I only get to remember your voice
If you keep me at bay
And all I do is wait for a day
that never comes
Then make me forget
Make me forget you once more
Because I don't want to love.
*abi - Yoruba word for isn't it.
* Touche - Good point.