Moros paced back and forth in his dingy dungeon room, already imagining the glory of his upcoming stream. He cracked his knuckles and chuckled to himself, "They'll be throwing money at me, literally."
The dungeon walls groaned in response, almost as if they were aware of the stupidity about to ensue.
He sat at his desk, opened his streaming platform, and set up his camera. The ring light flickered on, casting a sickly yellow glow over his disheveled face. He looked at himself in the webcam, noticing a patch of dried ketchup on his cheek from lunch. With a quick swipe of his sleeve, he was ready. Professional as always.
"Alright, folks!" he announced with exaggerated grandeur, "Prepare yourselves for the most epic, jaw-dropping, life-changing experience you will ever witness in your entire lives!" He raised his hands dramatically, though his mic only caught some feedback and static.
The chat box began to fill with messages as his handful of loyal viewers tuned in, half of them already spamming, "LUL" and "WTF is this guy on?"
"Today," Moros continued, leaning closer to the camera with a gleam of manic excitement in his eyes, "We have a unique opportunity. Something that money can't buy... except it totally can. For just a humble donation of... let's say, $100 each, you can witness the opening of a mysterious door that leads to untold power."
He paused for dramatic effect.
"Ten thousand dollars and we crack this baby open!"
The chat exploded with emojis of skepticism, laughing faces, and even the odd eggplant. Moros could feel the doubt seeping through his screen, but he waved it off.
"You guys don't understand! This isn't some average dungeon door. This is like, endgame level! Game-breaking stuff! But only if we can fund it together." He rubbed his hands greedily, already picturing the flood of cash pouring in. "And hey, I'll even show you the door."
Moros grabbed his webcam, yanking it away from his desk. The wire tugged, nearly knocking over a precariously stacked pile of empty ramen cups. He fumbled with the camera until he was standing directly over the mystical dungeon door. The glowing "$10,000 needed" hovered menacingly above it like an ancient neon sign mocking his bank account.
"Look at that! The mystical glowing dollar sign! That's how you know it's legit," Moros said, pointing at the hologram. "I can't open this door without your help, folks. We've got destiny waiting on the other side, so who's in?"
The chat fell into a stunned silence, save for one viewer who typed, "Dude… you broke?"
Moros' face twitched. "No, I'm not broke. I'm investing in the future. Our future."
He placed the camera back on the desk and checked his donations.
Zero.
He sighed, then leaned in close to the mic, dropping his voice to a dramatic whisper, "Alright, let me sweeten the deal. The first person to donate will get... uh… a personalized shoutout. Yeah, that's right, a shoutout from the legendary Moros! Your name immortalized in the annals of dungeon lore!"
Nothing.
"Come on! Someone's gotta be curious!" he pleaded. He was sweating now, glancing nervously at the glowing dollar sign as if it were judging him.
Suddenly, a ping!
A notification! Someone had finally donated! Moros' eyes lit up like fireworks, and he clicked on his donation tab. One dollar. One.
"Well, uh… thanks, DemonSlayer69," he said, trying to muster enthusiasm. "You, uh, get half a shoutout."
"YOU'RE BROKE LOL," another comment read.
Moros clenched his jaw. The chat continued mocking him, the laughing emojis multiplying like a virus. One user even sent a gif of a dumpster fire.
Fine, he thought. They'll see. He'd find another way.
"Alright, screw this," he muttered to himself, turning his attention to the hobo who was still cautiously watching from the corner. An idea formed in his head. A terrible, ridiculous idea.
"Hey!" Moros called out. "You want to make ten bucks?"
The hobo blinked, unsure if he was part of some elaborate prank. "Uh, sure?"
"Perfect!" Moros grabbed the man by the sleeve and dragged him over to the mystical door. "Here's the deal: I'm going to stream you punching the ground over and over again, like… heroically. I'll hype you up, and people will donate to see if you can open the door."
The hobo blinked again. "Wait, what?"
"No time to explain! Just—just punch the floor!" Moros shoved him forward.
Without much protest, the hobo began to awkwardly slap the ground, his face contorted in confusion.
Moros turned the camera back to the scene, eyes gleaming with excitement. "Here we go, folks! Live action floor punching, starring this man right here. Watch as he battles against the unyielding forces of nature!"
The chat went wild, now throwing in donations with commentary like, "LOLOL" and "This is so dumb I can't stop watching."
Money finally started trickling in.
Moros couldn't believe it. The ridiculousness was working. He quickly reached about fifty dollars in donations, all thanks to his random hobo hero.
"Keep going, man! You're doing great!" Moros shouted. "We're almost at ten thousand! We'll open this thing in no time!"
But then the hobo stopped, raising a trembling hand. "Uh, can I get that ten bucks now?"
Moros blinked, having completely forgotten about the promise. "Oh, yeah, sure." He fished a crumpled bill out of his pocket and handed it over.
As the hobo walked away, Moros turned back to his audience. "Well, folks… we're not there yet, but hey, we've got momentum!" He tried to smile, though his eyes were twitching with desperation.
Just then, the door gave a small, almost imperceptible creak. Moros froze, his breath catching.
The chat exploded.
"IT'S OPENING!"
"NO WAY!"
Moros stared in disbelief. Was it happening? Was he about to make history?
But then, the door stopped. Just as quickly as it had moved, it slammed shut with a loud thunk that echoed through the dungeon.
"WHAT THE HELL?!" Moros yelled, his fists clenched.
The dollar sign hovered mockingly above the door once again: $9,950 needed.
Moros' scream echoed through the dungeon, but this time, no one was watching. The stream had cut out.
Moros could hardly contain his excitement as he prepared for his grand event. He rushed around the dungeon, setting up his streaming gear with the precision of a general preparing for war. The camera angles were adjusted to perfection, the lighting (which was just a couple of flickering torches) was "mood-enhancing," and he even found some old dungeon chains lying around, which he draped artistically over the entrance to the door. Everything had to be just right. After all, his audience expected only the best.
He slapped his hands together, rubbing them with glee. "This is going to be epic!"
As the countdown to the stream began, he grabbed his headset and sat down cross-legged in front of the door, trying his best to look both mysterious and important. He practiced a few intense, brooding looks for the camera, trying to channel the energy of a guy who knew exactly what he was doing. In reality, he didn't have a clue. But confidence was everything.
The stream went live.
"Greetings, my loyal viewers!" Moros boomed, his voice echoing through the dungeon and bouncing off the stone walls. "Tonight, I'm going to show you something so incredible, so unbelievable, that you'll be begging to donate just to be a part of it!" He waved his arms theatrically in front of the screen, nearly knocking over a torch in the process. He caught it at the last second, hoping no one noticed the near-catastrophe.
"This…" He pointed dramatically at the door behind him. "This door leads to a treasure beyond your wildest dreams. But there's a price—a simple price of $10,000! And that, my friends, is where you come in!"
He put on his most convincing smile, which came across as more of a smirk. The comments were already rolling in, most of them ranging from skeptical to downright insulting.
User213: "Bro, you're nuts." GoblinSlaya: "10K for a door? What, did you buy it from IKEA?" PizzaPriest: "Is this another scam? Last time you made me donate for a 'rare' Gobbla fight, and it turned out to be a squirrel."
Moros ignored the naysayers, focusing instead on the few who seemed intrigued by his theatrical promises.
MissMystic: "What's behind the door?" BigMoneyMike: "I've got cash. Show me the goods."
"Ah, my good friend BigMoneyMike!" Moros grinned, eyes gleaming. "What lies behind this door is not just a treasure—it's an opportunity. An opportunity for growth, for power, and maybe… just maybe, eternal fame!"
Another comment popped up:
Lurker42: "Is it more Gobblas?"
Moros slammed his fist into the ground. "NO! It's not Gobblas! This is something bigger, better!" He gestured wildly at the door. "This is the door to transcendence. I don't know exactly what's behind it, but trust me, it's worth every penny!"
BigMoneyMike: "You don't know what's behind it?"
Moros's grin faltered for a second. "Uh… no. But that's part of the adventure! It could be anything! Gold! Artifacts! Maybe a portal to another dimension where everyone looks like me but richer!"
User213: "Sounds like you're gonna get scammed by your own scam."