Chereads / Attack on prime / Chapter 42 - 42.Fear Part 2

Chapter 42 - 42.Fear Part 2

Eren was quietly resting in Optimus' alt mode as the titan drove him back to the walls. Eren turned in his sleep as the titan continued to contemplate.

There must be something that he can do to help Eren and alleviate his worries. Maybe a way to control the flow of memories, or how to properly deal with them if they come up unexpectedly. No matter what, he had to try and figure this out. He needed to help him with this new power.

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Marley

Matthew threw a punch, which Gabi, Zofia, and Falco mimicked. He then kicked the air with clean precision; however, the three children struggled to do so. Matthew then threw a right hook, then a left uppercut, which the children were able to mimic.

Meanwhile, Colt was sitting on the sidelines, watching his brother and the others train with Matthew. Matthew decided to have them mimic his movements, so that they could learn from him without Matthew trying to harm them. Porco was ordered to help make plans for the next battle coming up, and Colt and Porco were ordered to come. Colt, Gabi and Zofia were ordered to remain behind in this battle and continue training. Commander Magath believed they needed a little more time before they returned to the battlefield. Colt was happy about that. Falco didn't have to put himself in danger.

"Stretch your legs," Matthew ordered them, "Your footwork needs to be better."

"Yes, sir!" they all saluted. Colt noticed the irritation in Matthew's face as Matthew was addressed as 'sir'. The kids began to stretch their legs while Matthew sat down next to Colt.

"I'm going to be heading out soon," Colt remarked.

"And I'm going to be stuck with these three idiots," Matthew hissed.

"I'm just glad my brother doesn't have to go," Colt said before he realized it. He grew worried and began to backtrack on his comment. "It's an honor to serve Marley, but I want to make sure my brother is safe."

"You do not have to do that Marleyan bullshit with me," Matthew proclaimed.

"Thanks for the reassurance, but…I can't afford something like that," Colt told him before whispering, "Others might be listening."

Megatron nodded his head in understand, but at the same time was irritated at the prospect. These children had no free will. They had to think a certain way, or they would be forced to become titans forever. The titan shifter might be able to say something, but Marley could just as easily target their families or give them to another batch of warriors.

"It doesn't sound like you joined Marley out of loyalty," Megatron whispered.

Colt grew stiff, but slightly nodded his head. "I…didn't have a choice."

Before Megatron could press, Magath came walking into the training grounds. The children and Colt got up to salute their Commanding officer. Colt looked down at Megatron with worry, wanting him to salute their commander out of protection, but Megatron simply brushed him off.

"You will all be doing shooting range exercises," Magath ordered, "Your training session with Matthew is over."

"Yes, sir!" they saluted him.

"Now move you devils!" he ordered.

Megatron noted the children being complacent as they ran to the compound. Megatron's eyes drifted towards Magath as the Commander glared at him.

"You're needed at the research facility," Magath proclaimed, "Now."

"That why you cut training so early?" Megatron demanded.

"Enough with the insubordination," Magath ordered, "You are here to do a job. No more, no less."

Megatron rolled his eyes and stood up. He couldn't wait for the day to put this pathetic human in his place.

-----------------------

Paradis

"'Medication'?" Eren asked.

"Meditation," Optimus corrected, "It is a developed practice from Earth that allows one to train the mind to have a more relaxed and calm mental state."

"What does that have to do with me?" Eren asked.

"I want to do more to help you deal with the memories you have been receiving from your father and possibly other titan shifters before you," Optimus told him as he kneeled down, "And while I do not have the solution, I do have a few ideas on how to calm the mind. Perhaps this might help you focus on the memories and gain a clearer understanding of them. Or it could help you clear your mind of the memories and relax."

"We'll still do training after this, right?" Eren asked.

"Yes," Optimus answered as he sat down with his legs crossed. He gestured in front of him, and Eren sat down on the ground, mimicking Optimus' position.

"Now, close your eyes and take a deep breath," Optimus said.

Eren did as he was told, shutting his eyes and taking a deep breath.

"Do not force yourself to breathe. Let it come naturally to you," Optimus continued, "Clear your mind of all distractions and negative thoughts."

Eren began to drown out Optimus' words and focused on clearing his mind. He was able to experience it. He was able to experience that moment of focus and relaxation, but then something flashed through his mind. He tried to block it out, but it came in an aggressive way. Eren gritted his teeth, wanting to call out to Optimus and tell him. He opened his eyes and found himself in a barren wasteland. He gasped rolled out of the way as a large foot nearly crushed him. He watched in horror as multiple Colossal Titans continued to walk forward. Their destination was unknown, but they continue to go in the same direction.

He tried to reach for them, wanting to know what was going on, but they began to fade from his sight. His hand continued to reach forward, but someone grabbed his hand and called his name. Eren's vision cleared and he saw Optimus looking at him with worry. Eren blinked, and felt tears roll down his cheeks. He wiped them away with his other hand, and gasped in fear as he saw blue tears.

"I-,"

"We need to go to Hanji," Optimus declared as he pulled Eren to his feet. Eren couldn't process what was happening as he was taken to Hanji.

-----------

Zeke could only watch as they created another mutated titan, clocking it at 3 meters tall. The titan continued its destructive rampage. The Commanders watched on in disgust and fear as it slammed into the wall. Zeke turned his attention to Matthew, and nearly wanted to scream as he saw the titan reading a book on Marleyan Law. Another explosion happened below as everyone covered their ears, but Matthew merely flipped to the next page of the book.

It was almost as if he didn't care at all. Like he was desensitized to weapons and war. How can he deal with this? Zeke noticed some of the Commanders looking at Matthew with fear and disgust. Zeke had no doubt that they speculated that Matthew was an Eldian, or at the very least, an Ackerman. Neither of which put him in a good position. If they demanded for an investigation, he and Matthew were screwed.

Zeke turned his attention to Commander Calvi's back. However, Calvi personally asked for Matthew's assistance to protect the other commanders. He might have gained Calvi's favor. As long as he had that, none of the other commanders could touch him. He just hoped it stayed that way.

-------------------

Paradis

Eren was brought back to his thoughts when Hanji began pulling his eyelids apart to examine his eye. He tried to move, but couldn't pry himself from her grip. The Commander noticed blue veins surrounding his eyes that didn't bother to recede back into his spine.

"Well," Optimus pressed.

"Well…," Hanji trailed off as she let Eren go, "It's something."

"Do you know why?" Optimus demanded.

Hanji sighed. "My theory: this is tied to Eren's emotions or will and all."

"My will?" Eren questioned, "I was trying to keep myself calm this time! How would that activate the powers?!"

"It's a theory," Hanji reminded, "When you activate your powers, you need to injure yourself along with having a strong sense of will, like wanting to fight Jean, or trying to calm your mind."

"So I can't even relax?!" Eren demanded in anger. Eren gasped as he saw the energon spread throughout the veins in his arms. He tried to cover them, but Hanji quickly pulled up one of his sleeves.

"So this might be an emotional trigger," Hanji noted, "Good to know."

"Isn't there a way to fix this?" Eren pleaded.

Hanji rubbed the side of her head in a tired motion. "I wish I knew. It's trying to discover exactly what it's doing to you that's the problem. Optimus, isn't there anything on that ship that would be useful in understand what is going on with Eren?"

"Almost all advanced medical supplies have been devoured by scraplets," Optimus informed, "The ones available has some sort of damage to it. None of which would be sufficient enough to conduct further analysis."

"You know, for someone with an infinite amount of Primely wisdom, it wouldn't kill you to know how to fix shit," Hanji groaned.

"I am a soldier of war, not a mechanic or a medical professional," Optimus reminded.

Eren saw Hanji holding a vial with a sample of his tears.

"Can we analyze this?" Hanji asked.

"I do not know," Optimus admitted.

Hanji threw the vial in the air before catching it. "I'll hold onto this and experiment with it. See what comes up before taking it to the neutral ship and hopefully get a better analysis there. For now, Eren, you should rest before you do anything else."

"But-!"

Optimus placed a hand on Eren's shoulder. "It is for the best. I will train you later, but your health is your priority."

Eren wanted to argue, but he couldn't. He probably wouldn't be able to focus. He had to make sure that he was able to keep up with Optimus.

"Okay," Eren relented, "I'll wait."

--------

Megatron walked down the hall as he continued to read the book on Marleyan law. The experimentation was uneventful, and that human wanted to keep the titan alive for further study. They most likely believe that they will be able to control it, but based on observation, it seemed like they were far from that. So now, he was heading to the Beast Titan's office to talk to him about the island's situation.

What he couldn't believe right now were the extensive amount of laws that were in discrimination of the Eldians. They couldn't exit the internment zone without a permit. Moving from one location to another was practically impossible, and job opportunities were limited. He had no doubt that even if they were allowed to work outside the internment zone, they would face harsh discrimination and cruelty. It was safer for them to remain inside the internment zone, but they had no freedom.

Megatron mindlessly stepped over something on the floor, but stopped when he noticed the thing on the ground moving. Megatron raised his head from the book and saw Pieck crawling on all four. Megatron was genuinely perplexed as he shut the book.

"Are you okay?" Megatron asked in his other vernacular.

Pieck raised her head to Megatron and smiled at him. "Matthew, good to see you. Sorry about this. Am I in your way?"

"No," Megatron responded.

"Well, that's good," Pieck said with relief.

"Is…there a reason you're on the floor?" Megatron asked.

"Being in my titan form for so long does take its toll," Pieck admitted, "I'm more used to walking on all fours instead of my own two feet."

"Then why don't you use your crutches?" Megatron suggested.

"I left them back in my house," Pieck admitted, "I thought that I'd be fine without it for the day."

Pieck was about to press forward, but Megatron quickly grabbed her collar and pulled her to her feet.

"Oh, you don't have to-,"

"You're going to get yelled at by a Marleyan," Megatron insisted, "Where do you need to go?"

"I just wanted to get something to eat," Pieck explained, "It's not that far-,"

Megatron slung Pieck's arm over his shoulder and used his other arm to hold her side. He helped her walk towards the cafeteria.

"You don't have to do this," Pieck insisted.

"I'm doing it," Megatron said.

"…you shouldn't do this," Pieck said, "You'll be spit on and called dirt."

"I can live with that," Megatron declared, "So, did you like the book I got you?"

Pieck seemed to look even guiltier.

"What's wrong?" Megatron asked her.

"The book was nice," Pieck explained, "But…I burned it afterword."

Megatron stopped and looked down at her. "That book was a gift. Why would you burn it?"

"I couldn't risk getting caught with it," Pieck whispered, "I managed to read it in secret, but I just couldn't be seen with it. People would ask and assume the worst. My dad could end up becoming a titan and I would lose my powers prematurely."

Pieck looked up at Megatron with a somber expression on her face. "I do thank you for the book. I'm sorry I wasted your money."

Megatron sighed in response. "If you enjoyed it, then it wasn't a complete waste."

Megatron and Pieck arrived at the cafeteria and set Pieck down on one of the tables.

"Matthew, why are you so nice to us?" Pieck asked.

"Is that so wrong?" Megatron asked her.

"We're Eldians," Pieck reminded, "We've destroyed the world."

Megatron chuckled in response as he filled a cup with water. "Trust me when I say this: I grew up in an environment where non-Eldians treated me like I was nothing. I was just a commodity. When you grow up in an environment where no one cares for you, you tend to realize an important truth."

Megatron handed Pieck the water. "Humans are trash, regardless if they can turn into a titan or not. Non-Eldians are no different than Eldians. We're cruel and disgusting against each other. Once you recognize that, the world is your oyster."

Pieck was surprised as she took the water from him. "It's almost as if you've given up on humanity."

"If the Colossal Titans in the walls on Paradis are activated, I believe that we deserve it," Megatron admitted, "Marley's doing what Eldia has done, and when Marley loses its power, the next country will do the same. We'll continue to be cruel to one another, and it will never end."

"There are still good people in this world," Pieck reasoned.

"Not from what I've seen," Megatron declared, "But it's interesting that an Eldian would think that there are good people in the world, when everyone else spits in your face."

"I just know where to look," Pieck smiled, "Kind of like right now."

"Sorry to disappoint, but you're getting your hopes up," Megatron insisted.

Pieck chuckled in response. "So you do hate Eldians after all?"

Megatron was confused by the girl's proclamation, but realized that she was testing him. She wanted to determine if his words were genuine. "I hate everyone. You being an Eldian makes no difference in that."

"So…why bother helping out Colt and Falco?" Pieck asked him.

Megatron raised an eyebrow. "I didn't know you knew about that."

"Word got around pretty fast," Pieck answered, "And Colt came to me and Zeke to vent about his worries before actually talking to you. So, if you hate everyone, why bother to help two Eldians?"

"…guess I thought of doing something nice," Megatron answered, "But usually when I do, it gets me into trouble."

"I guess being here with me would get you into more trouble," Pieck said, "You should probably go."

Megatron shrugged. "I'll see you around then."

Megatron grabbed some bread on the counter top before leaving Pieck alone in the mess hall.

-----------

Paradis

Hanji was fixing the thunderspear while Eren threw a punch at Optimus. Hanji looked up from her work to see Optimus block it before tripping Eren. The teen hit his back and rolled out of the way as Optimus' fist hit the ground.

Eren insisted that he was fine. Constantly insisted, stating that the energon regressed and that he wasn't feeling any pain at all. Optimus relented because Hanji is pretty sure that he has a soft spot for Eren. Hanji decided to let it happen because it would allow her to observe Eren during these fights, and see whether or not the energon would activate again. Hopefully, he wouldn't turn into a titan again the first time he started training with Optimus.

Eren managed to get on his feet before throwing a punch at Optimus again. Optimus caught his fist and twisted his arm before flipping him onto his back. Eren got up fast and grunted as Optimus kicked him in the face. Eren spit on the ground and wiped his face as Optimus got into his fighting stance. Eren made sure to keep himself calm as Optimus threw another punch. Eren was about to retaliate, but something flashed through his mind. Optimus was attacking him…but in his titan form. He was throwing a punch at him and something told him to-

Eren ducked his head and punch Optimus in the gut. He kicked the Prime in his knee, causing him to fall on his other one. Eren managed to put Optimus into a chokehold, and for some reason, he wanted to crush his windpipe.

"Holy shit!" Hanji exclaimed, snapping Eren out of his thought. He loosened his grip on Optimus, and the Prime grabbed his shirt and flipped him over on his back. Optimus pinned Eren to the ground and Eren groaned in pain.

"Eren, your eyes," Optimus began.

Eren gasped in fear as he forced himself up and looked down at his arms once more. The energon spread rapidly throughout his veins at a much more aggressive pace.

"What's going on?" Eren asked in a shaky voice.

Hanji got a mirror and put it up to Eren's face. Eren stared in horror as he saw his veins glowing blue around his eyes.

"What do I do?" Eren asked in a panic.

"Try to calm down," Hanji advised.

"I can't," Eren said as tears fell down his cheeks.

Optimus placed his hands on Eren's shoulders. "Take deep breaths."

Eren grabbed Optimus' hands tightly, taking deep breaths to the best of his ability. As Eren continued to take deep breaths, the energon inside of him receded back into his spine. Optimus sighed in relief as he took his hands off of Eren's shoulders.

"What happened, Eren?" Optimus asked with concern.

Eren was about to respond, but a vision flashed into his mind, showing Optimus' corpse on the ground. The spear was in his side, his eyes were lifeless, energon was leaking from his mouth.

Eren quickly stood up and back away from Optimus like he was cursed.

"Eren," Optimus reached out for him, but Eren shook his head.

"I can't," Eren proclaimed, "I can't do this."

Eren turned around and ran away from them.

"Eren, wait!" Hanji called out, but Optimus placed his hand on her shoulder. Hanji was about to retort, but she saw a worried look in his eyes.

"He needs time," Optimus insisted.

Hanji wanted to tell him to talk to him, but knew that Eren was too distraught to talk about it.

"I'll tell Armin and Mikasa," Hanji said.

----------------------------

Zeke was finishing a call with Yelena when some bread was placed on his desk. Zeke looked up to see Matthew moving towards the couch. The titan sat down and opened his book on Marleyan law to read.

Zeke picked up the bread before glancing at Matthew. "Thanks?"

"I took it so the Cart Titan would believe I was going to eat it," Matthew explained in his normal voice, "No more, no less."

Zeke rolled his eyes. Sounds about right.

"I do have a question," Matthew began.

Zeke raised an eyebrow. "About what?"

"Why are Colt Grice and his brother in the military?" Matthew asked.

Zeke thought over that information. "I suppose that reasoning is because of me."

Matthew shut the book. "In what regard?"

"When I sold out my parents to Marley, Colt and Falco's uncle was part of the group," Zeke explained, "Because of that, Colt's family was in danger of being sent to Paradis. They only way that they could prove their loyalty and save their family, was if Colt joined the military. Thankfully, he qualifies as a warrior candidate, so his family won't be forced to become titans."

"So they are forced to fight in this war because of you," Megatron concluded.

"Believe me, if I didn't sell out my parents, every single family member that had some sort of association with the EldianRestorationists would have been forced to become titans," Zeke proclaimed, "What I did was the better option."

Matthew stared at Zeke for a moment before returning to his book. "I'm not thrilled that I will be forced to stay here with the other humans."

"Orders," Zeke reminded, "There's not much I can do to influence that. But the lack of security should allow you to gather information more freely."

"I suppose it is a good thing that your world hasn't made video cameras yet," Matthew commented.

"Video cameras?" Zeke questioned.

"I won't explain that to you," Matthew declared.

Zeke got irritated as he began going over some reports. He suppose it is a little frustrating that this titan had more knowledge than him, and that knowledge just happened to be in the hands of Paradis. Despite this, Marley had the advantage of having more advanced weaponry. Eldia may have the titans, but it would still take some time for them to reach it.

"The island agreed to your proposition," Matthew informed.

Zeke raised his head to Matthew. "R-really?"

"Unfortunately," Matthew answered, "So inform your assistant and your team to step lightly when you send the ship to the island."

"I'll keep that in mind," Zeke said, "I'll be sure to send it when the military goes to the next battle."

---------------------------------

Paradis

Optimus began working on the tracker once more in the neutral ship, trying to get his mind off of what happened today. He wanted to go talk to Eren after what happened. He was at the door to his room, but he just couldn't bring himself to knock on the door. He wasn't sure if Eren needed time, or if he should talk to him. He noticed a change in Eren's behavior, but he didn't know if it was due to the energon experimentation, or the threat of Marley. Or his shortened lifespan?

Optimus sighed to himself as he covered his optics with his servo. It was all of it; he knew that. Eren had too much to bear on his shoulders. If there was a way that he could ease it, he would. But…he wasn't sure how.

Optimus heard some metal clatter and flinched. He looked down to see Hanji getting up and removing her foot out of a wedge in the floor.

"Commander, I need to work on this in private," Optimus informed.

Hanji used her 3D gear to lift herself onto the table. She got on top of the tracker, gaining the Prime's attention.

"What you need is a break," Hanji proclaimed, "You're worried about Eren. So am I, but I feel like this is getting to you more than me."

"Hanji-,"

"Come back to the walls, away from your work and the ship, and let's talk about it," Hanji insisted.

"I would appreciate it if I may continue with this," Optimus said.

"I'll just annoy you into coming back with me," Hanji proclaimed, "I'm already tired; it took me a while to get here by horse."

Optimus stared at Hanji before relenting. "Alright,"

-----------------

Zeke was sitting in a meeting with the other Commanders in regards to the invasion of Paradis island. At the moment, they intended to send two ships there to see what they could do. Unfortunately, Reiner was brought into the meeting for insider perspective. And the commanders were not thrilled about the situation.

"The island is aware of Marley and the power of the titans," Reiner reasoned, "Even if we decide to attack, it shouldn't be from the south."

"The South is the only place where large ships can dock," a commander retorted in irritation, "Any other location would be impossible."

"The Flying Titan destroyed the port," Reiner reminded, "There would be no place for large ships to dock regardless. Defenses are weaker in the north because the titans came from the south for a century. Even so, what if the Flying Titan is monitoring the island? He could be flying around, and we could be ambushed-,"

"Enough," Calvi ordered, "It's clear your experience with the Flying Titan has clouded your thought process."

"Sir-,"

"Do you have doubt in our power?" Calvi demanded.

"No-,"

"Then why are you fighting with us, devil?" Calvi demanded.

Zeke could tell Reiner wanted to say something back, but it would lead him into more trouble. Reiner bowed his head in shame.

"I am sorry for speaking out of turn," Reiner apologized.

Calvi waved his hand. "We've heard enough from you."

Reiner walked out of the room and shut the door behind him. Zeke turned his attention to Commander Calvi.

"Reiner Braun does bring valid points," Zeke reasoned, "Brute force alone is not enough to take these titans down and retrieve the Founding Titan."

"These titans have not seen the power of our military might," a commander proclaimed, "Without them, those island devils would be nothing."

"But they do have those titans," Magath reminded, "And they have the experience and power. We cannot attack them head on."

"What is your recommendation?" Calvi asked.

"We do attack from the south," Magath answered, "But we find another location to land and sneak into the walls to obtain the Founding Titan. We have to avoid the presence of both titans."

"They are valuable," another commander reasoned, "More valuable than the Founding Titan."

"But we have no means of capture, or understanding their technology, or even who they are," Magath retorted, "We don't even have a name for the Flying Titan. That is how little we know about them."

"…we will send two ships to the south for infiltration," Calvi decided, "If that does not work, we will redirect the boarding of the ship to the north. Defenses will be less vulnerable there."

"They may be expecting our presence, since they are now aware of our existence," Zeke reminded.

"They do not know the weaponry at our disposal, and they do not know that we are at war," Calvi retorted, "That should give us some advantage."

Zeke resisted giving a sour face. The Flying Titan was right under their nose, and Zeke would have to tell them about this meeting. Marley had no advantage over them at all.

-------------

That night

Eren stared up at the ceiling to his room. It was late, really late. He hasn't been able to sleep. The images of Optimus' death kept on plaguing his mind. He didn't even tell Optimus what was wrong. He felt like he hasn't been able to vent to Armin or Mikasa. He didn't want to burden them with what he was seeing. It scared him.

Eren sat up on his bed. Maybe if he talked to Optimus, and explained the situation, it might help.

Eren exited his room and shut the door before walking down the hall. He just needed to go outside, and Optimus should be there if he wasn't at the ship. Eren heard muffled talking as he saw a light coming from one of the rooms. He was about to ignore it, but he recognized one of the voices as Hanji's.

"You know it really sucks you can't drink," Hanji said, "This whiskey is hitting the spot."

"I was never really one for high-grade energon," Optimus explained.

"Don't like the taste?" Hanji asked.

"I…don't have a tolerance for it," Optimus admitted.

"Optimus Prime is a lightweight?" Hanji asked with eagerness and disbelief, "I feel sorry for you, but I also want to know if you ever got drunk."

"Hanji-,"

"Have you done anything embarrassing while drunk?" Hanji asked.

"Why would I tell you this?" Optimus questioned her.

"For science," Hanji declared, "Speaking of science, I went over that vial of Eren's tears."

Eren stiffened at Hanji's proclamation.

"I…I didn't really find any difference," Hanji admitted, "I'm sorry."

Optimus sighed as he rubbed his eyes in irritation. "What do we say to Eren? How do we explain to him that we still have no knowledge of this situation?"

"Optimus-,"

"I could see it in his eyes," Optimus continued, "He was terrified. Despite the fact that he improved during training, he was more terrified after he was able to gain the upper hand."

"Optimus, it wasn't your fault," Eren heard Hanji reason with him, "What happened with Eren was by accident. You couldn't have known he was going to have an anxiety attack."

"That is not the issue," Optimus told her.

"Then what is?"

"I…," Optimus trailed off, "I feel as though I can do nothing to help him."

Eren was shocked at the proclamation. Optimus always helped him. Why would he say that?

"Optimus, that's bullshit," Hanji reasoned, "You're always breaking your back to make sure he's okay. You've saved his life, you trained him, you're actively ensuring his mental health and making sure he doesn't go rogue."

"It feels as though every time I try to help him, I make the situation worse or it does not help him at all," Optimus reasoned, "I do not know how to respond to the energon situation, or his shortened lifespan, or the situation in regards to Marley. I tried to help him meditate, but it did nothing to calm his mind. Meditation is meant to be a consistent practice, but it made him shed lubricant. He has been experiencing past memories-,"

"When was this?" Hanji demanded as Eren grew tense.

"He told me yesterday," Optimus answered, "I was going to refrain from telling for privacy reasons, but the energon is clearly messing with his processors."

"What did he see?" Hanji demanded.

"He said he was seeing his father's memories," Optimus answered.

Hanji grimaced and shut her eyes. "Shit. No wonder Eren's acting the way he is. He's probably experiencing his father getting his fingers cut off, his first wife turning into a titan, his sister's corpse. This is severe."

"Hanji, I have no idea how to help him or what to do," Optimus declared, "I…I fear for Eren's safety."

Eren turned his head to peak through the room and saw that Optimus was hunched over in the chair. Hanji put her drink down and rubbed his back in comfort.

"Listen," Hanji began, "We are the Survey Corps. Our main goal is to investigate and learn about what we do not know. We will figure out what is going on with Eren, and we will make sure that he lives to his full term."

Optimus still looked unsure, but he nodded his head regardless. "Do not bring up what I told you about Eren's memories to him. I do not want Eren to feel pressured into sharing what is going on."

Eren was surprised while Hanji's mouth formed a thin line.

"I think we should discuss this soon, but I get it." Hanji relented, "My lips are sealed."

Eren didn't want to hear anymore and made his way back to his room. He didn't know what to do. Now, he felt like he couldn't tell Optimus because it would cause the Prime to be more concerned about him. He didn't want anyone to worry about him, but…

The memory of Optimus' corpse flashed through his mind and Eren clutched his head. There had to be a way to figure out what these memories were, but he couldn't access the full power of the Founding Titan because he isn't of royal blood. The only time he was able to access it was when he was in that cave, and Historia and her father put their hands on his back.

Eren came to an epiphany as he ran up the stairs of the castle. He needed Historia. He needed Historia's help to unlock these memories.

-------

Ymir groaned in irritation as someone knocking on the door woke her up. She sat up before looking down to see Historia still sleeping, moaning as she moved to grab her pillow. The knock came on the door again and Ymir almost swore. It was late, and she was tired! What the hell could be going on right now?!

Ymir got up and walked over to the door. She was about to chew out the bastard who was there, but was surprised to see a distressed looking Eren. His eyes were still that piercing blue, and it looked like he hadn't sleep in hours.

"My god, you look like shit," Ymir swore, "Is this what's going to happen to me?"

"I need to talk to Historia," Eren told her.

"Wait 'til the morning," Ymir told him, "It's late, and I'm already pissed about you waking me up in the middle of the night just to talk to my wife."

"Ymir, it's urgent," Eren pleaded, "This can't wait until the morning."

"Can't I just tell Historia you want to meet with her later?" Ymir groaned.

"No," Eren begged, "Please, I need her help."

Ymir could see the sheer panic written all over Eren's face. She could see that he was desperate. Before Ymir could respond, Historia placed a hand on her shoulder.

"Ymir, what's going on?" Historia asked as she rubbed her eyes.

"Historia, I need your help-,"

"Hold it," Ymir hissed as she turned to his wife, "Historia, go back to bed."

Historia looked over Ymir's shoulder as her vision cleared to see Eren's distressed expression. "Eren, what's wrong?"

"I need to talk to you in private," Eren pleaded.

"No way," Ymir interjected, "What do you even want at this hour?"

"I…I can't say, but Historia can help me," Eren answered, "Historia, please."

Historia didn't want to leave Eren alone like this. It looked like he needed someone. She turned to Ymir and kissed her cheek.

"I'll be right back," Historia promised.

Ymir wanted to retort, but sighed in response. She had to respect her wife's decision. "I'll wait for you."

Historia nodded as she followed Eren out the room and shut the door behind her. Eren continued walking down the hall as Historia tried her best to keep up due to her tired state.

"Eren, what's wrong?" Historia asked.

"We need to be in a secure place," Eren reasoned.

After some time walking out of the castle, the two of them ended up in the horse's barracks. Eren lit one of the lanterns set before setting it down on the ground.

"Eren, what's wrong?" Historia asked.

"I need your help in accessing memories," Eren declared.

Historia blinked in confusion. "I thought we already did that in the cave."

Eren shook his head. "Not those memories. These are different ones. I've been having them since I took the energon serum, and it keeps on messing with my head. Over and over again,"

"How come you didn't tell Optimus, or Hanji?" Historia asked, "What about Armin and Mikasa?"

"Armin and Mikasa wouldn't understand," Eren reasoned, "I can't even tell them about my own father's memories. How can I tell them about something I don't even know is true? And every time I try to tell Optimus…there's this thing that stops me."

"What thing?" Historia asked.

Eren looked down in shame.

"Eren-,"

"I don't even know if I'd be able to tell you," Eren admitted before rolling up his sleeve and holding out his bare arm, "But you might be able to see what I'm talking about."

Historia looked down at his arm. "Are you sure you can't just tell me?"

"Every time I try to tell someone, I'm shown something terrible," Eren answered, "If we make contact, like we did in the cave, you might be able to see what I see."

Historia debated her options. She was nervous about this prospect, but if it helped, then…

Eren watched Historia roll up her sleeve and hold out her bare arm. Eren began trembling as Historia reached out her hand to his arm. They clasped their hands around each other's arms, and the onslaught of memories came flooding in.

"My name is Grisha Jaeger!" his father shouted in the cave at Frieda Reiss, "I'm like you, a subject of Ymir! Please, you must kill the titans attacking the wall at once! If you don't, my entire family will be devoured!"

Eren found himself fighting another titan shifter with a large hammer. Megatron was there, along with the other members of the Survey Corps, but there was one unfamiliar being running around and attacking another titan shifter. The titan shifter had energon in their veins and ran at high speeds to attack the other titan.

He could feel Megatron slam him against the wall in his holoform and look at him with such anger and fury, wanting to kill him. He suddenly felt angry when he found himself somewhere at the night time. Megatron was talking with someone but he couldn't determine who.

"Eren, I will save you, along with the rest of Eldia," a man swore, "You won't have to suffer anymore."

Eren found himself talking to a woman with a bowl cut, seemingly offering him a proposition. He later found himself talking to Floch, but he couldn't determine why he was doing it in the first place.

"Eren, please," an older Mikasa pleaded, "Come home."

Eren later saw tears coming down Mikasa's face, while he physically attacked Armin, who was glaring at him with a venom and an unwillingness to concede. Eren slammed his foot into Armin's chest and pinned him to the ground.

"You have placed everyone on the island at risk now. It is only a matter of time before an aerial attack happens from all corners of the world. People on the island will die because of your brash actions." Optimus swore, the titan looking at him in his holoform through cell bars.

"So I sit by and do nothing like you?!" Eren shouted back.

"I would rather die than put my life in your hands! Do you hear me?!" a female voice shouted.

"Chief, let's go," someone told Optimus.

He could see his friends, his family, fighting the Colossal Titans together. He watched in horror as they all were dropping to the ground dead.

"But heed my warning, Eren Jaeger. It doesn't matter the motivation.

Optimus and Megatron's blades clashed against each other.

It doesn't matter the goal.

"Why are you here?" an older, scared Reiner asked him.

"I'm just like you," Eren told him, "I had no choice."

If you go down the path, no one will be by your side

Eren found himself face to face with Optimus in his titan form.

Your friends

Everyone was pleading with Eren in his titan form as he took a deep breath.

Your family

He could hear Mikasa screaming in agony.

everyone will turn their back on you

He could see everyone, titans and humans, coming at him with their weapons.

No one will care for the purpose. They'll just see the actions and destruction that you've caused.

"We must stop the demon, Eren Jaeger!" someone declared, "Join me in the fight against the demons of Paradis!"

No matter what side, you will never be seen as a hero.

He could see humans screaming as they were running for their lives. He then saw a young girl screaming for her friend as he fell to his death.

You will only be seen as a monster.

Eren heard a loud, wet sinking noise. He could feel blood on the hands of his titan form, and he could tell that he was holding something in his hand. He touched something with his other one, but what he felt…was metal.

Eren felt dread growing in the pit of his stomach. In his vision, he could only see the Colossal Titan still roaming the Earth. He looked down in horror, as he saw Optimus Prime. His mask was broken, and energon was pooling from his mouth. He coughed up more of it and it hit Eren's chest. He transformed his arm with the broken blade back into his hand as he reached up for Eren. Eren was beginning to panic. He could feel dread, fear and horror fill his body as Optimus looked at him with sorrow, sadness, regret, and hopelessness.

"E-eren," Optimus coughed up more energon.

Eren was frozen, as Optimus' hand touched Eren's face.

"I…failed you," Optimus said, "I'm…so…,"

Eren could only watch as Optimus fell backwards and hit his back on the ground. Eren felt something leave his grip as he hit his back, and he recognized that he had stabbed Optimus with a spear-like dagger in his side. Eren trembled, his legs began shaking as the life from Optimus' eyes faded, leaving only a dull grey. Eren looked down at his hands to see them stained with Optimus Prime's blood.

He killed Optimus. He killed Optimus! HE KILLED OPTIMUS! Eren quickly knelt down, his hands trembling as he grabbed Optimus' shoulders. He shook him, tried to wake him up, but it was no use. His body was already getting colder. Eren began to cry in an abundance, bringing the body close to him and holding it deathly tight. He tried to beg Optimus to wake up, but his prayers fell on deaf ears. When Eren recognized that Optimus was dead, that Optimus was gone and he was the one that killed him, he raised his head and screamed out to the heavens as the Colossal Titans trampled the Earth.