I'm a 24-year-old living inside of my parents house, living off their inheritance with no cares in the world.
I used to be one of the most talented people of my age, but now, I stay at home rotting away like the deadbeat I am, and I wouldn't have it any other way
My day consists of laying in my bed getting off to questionable content all day, looking at anime, and being an overall stay at home shut in
Over and over, day after day, it's been like this, always.
I can't say its a bad life though, even if it wasn't what I wanted when I was younger
It all started when I left high school. Growing up, I was an honors student living it up as the smartest kid ever. No one around me could come close to my intellect.
Then I got to college, and my parents died in an accident. I'm not going to say I felt amazing, but I never felt the hollowness that one would expect.
Since then, I've dropped out and coasted off the money that they left me. My room is filled to the brim with trash, there's mold growing in the corners, and the worst part?
I feel no shame.
For the first months, maybe a year, I'm not sure to be honest, my family came to check up on me. After they saw the state I was in and refused to get out of, they just sort of quit. I don't blame them either, but if I'm being honest they can go fuck themselves. All they care about is the inheritance money anyways.
Who are they to judge me anyhow? It was all "You need to get better for your family's legacy" and "This isn't what they would have wanted" Bah!
(Why do they even care, it's not like they know how it feels...)
What do they know? All my life, I've been told that I was allowed to do what I wanted, have what I wanted, the works. So who are they to judge me for doing exactly what I desire, especially after all I've been through.
I deserve to have what I want
But that's not important. What's important is that I'm here, being myself. That's what they would have wanted...?
Yeah, that's what they wanted.
But enough about that, a new episode of---
THUD! THUD! THUD!
Knocking? There's knocking at my door. It's not light knocking either, it's rushed, almost frantic.
I'm not sure who it could be, the police have an agency about them, and I don't think it's the middle of the month for the food I order.
(what time of the month is it again...?)
THUD! THUD! THUD!
"Alright alright I'm coming!"
(not that I want too, I just got comfortable...)
Much to my dismay, I got up and started walking down the stairs. To be honest I'm not sure how long it's been since I've actually gotten up and walked around. I haven't had to use the facilities in a couple days so I guess then? I usually just go in the Big Fizz soda Cups around me, it's funny. I've actually mistaken a couple of them for my current drink bottles while watching some of my "entertainments". The taste was awful, not as bad as the time I ate a roach though, it was absolutely atrocious. The taste still gives me nightmares.
I continue walking down the stairs regardless. If it's food or anime then it's important, I can't go without the sweet sustenance that both of those gi—
"William? Is that you?"
Shock.
That's the only thing that I felt, pure shock
(what is she doing here...?)
I'm standing here in nothing but my underwear, reeking of debauchery and rotten food, god knows how old, and my kid sister is in front of me. What is she wearing too? Stained and tattered clothing, worn down high heels, I can barely recognize her.
"Caroline, is that you? What are you wearing? You look like a Victorian chimney cleaner"
The words came out of my mouth before I could even think. I suppose being alone for so long will do that to you, but even still, I didn't know my social skills were so bad
Her face turned beet red and full of anger for just a moment, before turning back to her normal self. I probably shouldn't have said that to her, but she honestly deserves it for not visiting once.
(Did she even try to visit? I don't remember...)
"What do you need? If it's money you need then you can just leave now. You and our Aunts already took your portion of the company and stocks, all I got was this house and my share of the money. That was your deal."
Ahh yes. The inheritance deal. In no shortage of the word, I was shafted
Originally. I was supposed to have shares in our fathers company, but instead I was written out by my Aunts and told to kick rocks.
"I need your help.. I know I have no right to your help, but I'm in a really bad spot right now. Aunt Marilyn has passed away from cancer, and everyone else has seemingly disappeared.. You're the only person that I have."
(Did Aunt Marilyn have cancer?)
Not that it matters though. Cancer sucks, but even still, I didn't know her enough to care enough.
She was given stocks and shares in my fathers company, she should be able to sell those and make the money that she needs.
"Please William, I need your---"
"Get out of my sight. You have enough money to live off for the rest of your life, just sell the stocks. You don't need me. Now get out, I don't need vagrants at my door."
I slammed the door on my baby sisters face. Looking back, I was almost a hero to her, we were basically inseparable, but now it's like she's a stranger looking through a window. My younger self would kill me if he saw what I've become.
It's better this way.
Well it doesn't matter now, she's gone.
The torrential rain around me drowned out whatever inner monologue that I had left that night
Some time has passed between my sister knocking on the door of my house and now. I haven't done much since then, mostly just laid down in my bed all day, watching anime and getting off.
If I'm being honest with myself, I feel slightly bad. Every day that's passed is another day I know I should have done something, but in my head I know it's easier to not change, to stay how I am.
Let them suffer, they're the ones that left you
That's what I keep hearing anyways. My inner thoughts telling me what it's not worth it, that they're the ones at fault, that I've done nothing wrong. Hell, they're probably right, what has my family done for me since my parents died
THUMP THUMP
Yeah... Why should I feel bad? They took away my stocks in the inheritance and I'm still the one doing good. If they squabbled away their money, that's their fault!
THUMP THUMP
YEAH! Hell I'm smart for letting myself get this way! It means that I can continue to be amazing by myself! Who needs other people around them? I've got my body and the internet to keep me company!
THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP THUMP
All I need it my dick in my hand, anime, and my steady supply of manga. I'm going to be perfectly fi-
Thump... thump..... thmp.... thp...
Pain. Nothing but an undeniable screaming in my chest that I hadn't felt before. Something that I didn't know existed until now. I'd lived my life up until this point avoiding anything that could hurt me so now I'm not sure what to do
It feels like my heart is going to explode out from my chest. Food? No, I haven't eaten today
There's a rush of emotions that I'm feeling right now, some of which I haven't experienced in a long long time. The one that's getting me though is remorse... When was the last time I felt this?
I'm searing for an explanation for what's going on. My body, my mind, it all feels like it's slipping
What's going on?! Why is my body going numb?! Why is everything starting to---
Oh
A heart attack
Ah, that's what this is.
I remember reading about this when I was younger. I suppose old education does really pay off, not that it does much at this point
I feel myself becoming more and more numb. I suppose after everything that I put my body through, I should expect it to give out on me.
Aren't I supposed to see the light before I die? Why is nothing appearing. There's... Nothing. Just the spasming of my body, the sounds of the trash and cans rattling all around me as I writhe in pain, trapped inside this head of mine as my body gives out
This wasn't the plan.. I was supposed to become great. Growing up all I was told was how amazing I was, I was idolized by everyone around me, so why... WHY?!
WHY AM I DYING IN SUCH A PATHETIC WAY?!
"Puhhhh!"
My last gasp for air.
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My last semblance of trying to live, I reach out around me and try to grab anything. The only thing I reach though is my old TV/VCR combo. I remember watching this growing up, happy that my parents were there with me...
I feel myself slipping, the last crumb of life leaving my body, and I can feel every bit of it slip away. I can't even say I lived a good life at the end of this all. I reach out one more time, grabbing at my tv. Maybe If I can crash it on the floor someone will hear and save me---
Before I can even udder another though, my TV falls on my head, crushing the last bit of life that I had left in me, y last thoughts going back to the laptop with porn on it. God I wish I could have felt nice one last time...