Before I go back to my room, I help Raden, the coach, and several staff members on the team decorate and set the party for congratulating Emris on the first floor, where the arcade and games are, with my broken body and sore legs.
"Let me help."
Raden offers to help while I tip-toe on the ladder, hanging the pink sign written on the reflecting paint brush in white chrome.
He shows me his palm.
"..."
I put my hand in his palm to support myself and step down.
"Thank you."
I tell him with the lowest energy I've ever had.
I excuse myself and drag myself to my room, take out the bunch of ice cubes, pour them into the bathtub, and turn on the water. I'm not waiting for the water to fill up. I take out my clothes and let my body soak in the cold to numb from the pain. And I don't even bother to feel cold because I'm so exhausted.
"Get...out.'
I tell him.
Then Xin moves, sprinting out of my veins and out of my feet to become a normal shadow form.
-silence-
'Roelle.'
…
'Roelle.'
"Roelle."
Xin calls my name in his echoing voice. His hand holds me face to face with his black figure beside the bathtub.
"Are you alright?"
He asks.
"..."
I swiftly put my face out of his hand and turn to the other side.
"You're mad."
"I'm just exhausted."
"You shouldn't take yourself that far, and you know that you have to come back to train again."
"If you helped me, I wouldn't be this drained."
"..."
"I"
Then I drown myself under the cold water before he's about to say something.
-silence-
The coaches, Laith, Raden, the teams, and Emris are the main people in the party. They turn on the music, the team members play games, the buzzcut coach leans his back and eats the cake, Raden drinks the sodas, and Laith bottoms up the glass of beer.
"We never had a party before. Even Riz won so many times, hehe."
Emris's coach.
"Roelle asked me."
Laith, the team leader.
"And where the hell is she?...and how that girl ran to see him like that and passed the guards."
Emris's coach.
"Why didn't you stop her?"
Laith asks the buzz-cut coach.
"She made a deal with me...I couldn't stop her even though I wanted to. After blocking, she jumped out of the stage and went. How can I stop her?"
"..."
"Riz, you put the spell on her or something?'
Emris's coach asks Emris.
"..."
Laith glares at Emris so hard.
"And where is she?"
Emris asks.
"!"
Raden's shocked by the quiet, preserved man asks about a girl.
"She crawled herself back to her room after finishing the setup."
The buzz-cut coach.
"When the coach says crawl, it's exactly that. She crawled up the stairs...even crawled out from the stage."
Raden explains while eating snacks beside Laith, who is still staring at Emris.
Then, Emris gets up and leaves the party.
"Hey, where are you going?"
Emris's coach asks.
"..."
He says nothing and gets upstairs.
...
"Ha!!"
I gasp in the air when Xin pulls me out of the water.
"You're going to pass out in the bathtub."
He tells me with a steady, echoing voice.
"Let me be in the water so I don't feel any pain."
I tell him.
"I'm sorry, Roelle."
"Just ignore me…like you did before."
I am acting like a kid in front of Xin.
"..."
"I don't like you getting close to that man."
Xin.
"...Why?"
"You don't know what he is…He might be dangerous."
"Everyone is dangerous, Xin. Including me...including you."
"..."
Then, I move my body to the side, let it soak in water, and close my eyes.
...
"!"
Xin appears at the door before it opens.
"You can't come in here."
Xin.
"Where is she?"
Emris.
"..."
"What did you do?"
Emris.
"Me? She can't even walk because of you. LEAVE–"
Xin's voice echoes and vibrates the room loudly.
"!"
The door shuts on its own by the black smoke.
"Ha…"
Xin pulls me out of the bathtub and carries me to the bed without any clothes on, and the water drops on the way from my naked body. I can't even open my eyes to see. I want to sleep.
He puts me on the mattress. He grabs my right foot, and I feel ticklish. I raise my body to look at him. He touches my right foot and lets the smoke run into my skin.
"It will help."
"Ahh! It hurts."
I flinch, but he grabs it.
"...A bit. Your nerves are tense. I lose them up."
"...ah..."
I see the smoke line run through my leg up to my thigh.
"Ah, Xin..."
I glare at him a little.
"Don't move away."
He tells me and comes closer to me, dragging me into him, and his smoke accidentally touches my crotch in the center part.
"Ah...ah..."
Xin.. don't touch there.
'...'
He lightly moves his smoke away.
"...ha...I think it's enough."
"Another leg."
Xin grabs my left leg.
"..."
"You should sleep. I'll take care of it."
"...ah..."
I look at him and lean myself back on the soft bed.
'Why is your expression like that?'
…
'Roelle? sleep yet?'
Just don't touch there.
'Forgive me?'
Um...ah.
The following day, I run after the motorcycle at high speed, come back to punch the rubber-punching bag, and then go down to the dark room. The light on the stage is off, but it turns on behind the stage, showing the long path from where I stand to the end of the other side.
There are four ropes knotted to the wall from my side. Two strings at my shoulder level are three feet away from one another at the same parallel level. And another two strings are above me, around three feet away. They are pulled tightly and knotted on the wall to the other side.
"Today, we work with your shadow."
Coach.
'Finally.'
"Yes."
I answer.
"Just like we practiced before with the ropes, slide side to side with the back sides touching the ropes, but this time let him… run to the back of the foot and let him pull the sprint for you. While doing that, you have to control the balance of your body and move from side to side along with him."
Okay... Xin?
'Um. I'm ready.'
"Strong form, balance your feet…"
"Bzz...Bzz."
The sound of the sparking lighting coming out around my legs and downward to the ankles and my feet.
I can feel the rush inside my veins.
Then, I push myself, running ahead.
"Flashhhh!!"
"Thug!!!"
My face hits the wall to the other side in one second.
"Fuck..."
'I'm sorry !! I'm sorry, Roelle.'
I can't even bring myself to the side of the robe. I couldn't even see the robe at that fast pace.
It's fine. It's fine.
"Control your body! Try again. Start from there."
"Okay…Let's do it again."
I talk to myself.
"Side…move to the side..to side.."
I mumble.
"Bzz...Bzz"
"Flashhhh!!"
"Thugg!!"
Now my body hits the stage on the side.
"Again!"
Coach.
I walk back to the start, where the coach stands.
"Let the shadow keep the same speed. Don't slow it down or make it faster, at the same normal speed. If you can control it, we can move to another level."
"Yes, Coach."
"Strong form."
He leans down and touches my ankles.
"Balance two feet.
'Are you ready, Roelle?'
"Yes."
"Bzzz…Bzzz."
Then, I push myself ahead.
Side and side.
"Thug!!"
"Good! Better."
I control my body to the side of the robe and come back, but I can only do it two times, and I already reached the wall.
'Nice, nice.'
Okay...again.
"Again!"
"Flashhhh!!"
"Thug!"
"Good. Again!"
I repeat and try to control my body at Xin's speed. I try to understand the feeling of the veins rushing in and out under my feet. And each time I run, I get better each time. I can move myself side to side more and more—two to three, three to four, four to six before I reach the end of the rope.
"Again!"
Coach.
Coach was out at his home, leaving us to practice and take a break. But I chose to keep doing it. I lost track of time; I kept doing this again and again.
Xin.. let's try something.
'What?'
Well, if only I could control my body. You know my veins, my nerves, and probably my thoughts.
'Yes, but not your thoughts...I don't know what you're thinking sometimes.'
But you tend to figure it out...more than myself, I can say.
'Okay, so what are you planning?'
"Hehe."
I chuckle at the fun idea.
Go along with me, and don't let me fall and hit the floor, Okay?
'Ha?...I won't...let you fall.'
I push myself to run ahead side to side along the ropes, jump to catch the ropes ahead, swing down, slide to the floor, and run side to side between ropes.
With all the speed, I give the rush and the movement without fear of falling down and getting hurt because I let Xin sprint himself along with my body, in and out, holding my body at my pace and pushing and catching.
"Thug!"
And jump down to the floor.
"Ha...Ha...hehe."
I am panting and chuckling at the same time.
'Whoo...That was a rush.'
Again?
'Bring it on.'