Dad ask me to visit this school together with him, I hated the idea with him.
"I'll visit myself, no need for dad to come with me"
"Alex, this is an elite school, there is formalities from it. You learn from it" ugh as long I'm with dad I can't stand it. But Mom console me
"You have too because dad knows someone from the school, he will arrange everything" I don't agree with Mom
"but…"
"No but's, listen to your dad…"
"Fine…"
It was another week because of school break, I went out from the house and Hana followed me behind.
"Hey Hana, don't follow me"
Hana keep following me and I had no other choice but let her. We walk along our community where is called a village, 10km from the nearest town. Hana suddenly ask me
"Big brother, do you think Mom and dad are going to be together again?"
"Who knows, but inshallah everything will be fine, I think you better be focus in school okay"
Hana is only 7 years old and Sam is 1 year old, he is still a baby. I walk slowly together with Hana. The village is quiet place with jungles and forest trees nearby, its the wild in my backyard. A damn jungle, Dad used Mom money to build the mansion in a tiny village. I visit house with people is cleaning their own yard. They smile at me, and I wave them. They speak in Malay, a common language in this country. I will translate it.
"Assalamualaikum, you new here?"
"No, the last time I m here is 1994"
"Owh, that means you are Man's children ya, well nice to meet you"
Dad is well known in this village, but he always meet them in the mosque. I wish Natalie would see what I see. But I know she is far from me. I wondered what is she doing now. I walk farther until I reach at the end of the road which is a dirt road, with a pack of dogs nearby. Hana is scared and I said to her
"Alright lets turn back ok?"
"Yeah…"
We turn back and walk another path within the village, there we meet a group of kids playing in the small empty land. I look at them they playing football (not American football), I sat there looking at them. They look at me and said to me "hey who are you, you new here?" I meet a familiar face, which I know that boy.
"Zuan right?"
"Hey I know you, you Alex wow, you look different"
I had brown hair that look like a foreigner to them. I had a bit understanding in Malay language but some of it had to adjust myself.
"Yeah its me, you remember right?"
"Yeah the little kid, that we used to play together in your home, wow its been 6 years"
6 years I left Malaysia because my Mom had to complete her PHD in USA. I introduce my sister to them.
"This is Hana, you remember her right?"
"Yep, she was little at that time, hahahaha"
"Hana say something"
Hana was shy girl and behind me at all times.
"I am Hana nice to meet you.."
They offered me to play with them, and Hana played with someone at her age, a girl name Nami. They instantly become close. At least I m not worried for her not socialising with friends. We played football together until it was dark. We return home and wave them goodbye. We reach home Mom was cooking and said to us to bath. I return to my bed and ask mom to lent me a computer where I can email to Natalie.
"The wifi is not ready yet maybe used the main computer first!"
I head to the computer room, and dad was there reading his book. Dad look at me and ask me whether I know how to use it. He doesn't know that I can use a computer!
"Yeah I know dad, can I use the computer?"
"Don't play games in it"
"I want to email my friend"
"Really…well then use it…"
I became irritate with dad, he underestimate me and turn on the computer which is an old computer. I connected with the internet making a rattling sound from the speaker. I open my email, there were a lot of messages. I began to read one by one, it is from my friends in the states. And one of them is Natalie.
Hey Alex,
Have you arrive in Malaysia yet I hope to hear from you soon
Love,
Natalie
I replied her back and all my friends that I have arrived safe and sound. Then Dad called me
"That is enough, time for dinner, Alex"
I close my email and the computer and head towards the dinning room. It was quiet, while eating nothing like we eat with Mom and Aunt Deb. Dad ask mom
"When are you going back to work?"
"How about Sam? Does our maid have return?"
I remember that we had a maid that looking after me when I was young together with Hana. Her name was Mary or Matilda? I completely forgot. Dad talk to me.
"We going to a stationary shop to buy all of the things for you to school"
"I'm old enough, just tell me where it is"
"Is that how you said to me Alex"
"Then where it is?"
"No, you will follow me to the stationary shop together with Mom because Hana is also going to school"
The elite school is comprises of Primary and Secondary, much different compared to USA school which divided into Elementary, Secondary and Form 6. So basically I'm with Hana together to school. Mom ask me to prepare myself for the syllabus that will be different from before.
"This is a different system, you must wear uniform at all times and you don't need to change class just sit in the same classroom"
Darn, expected from typical school in Malaysia where it is a must to wear uniform. What's worst everything in Malay. Which I am used to learn in English. Dad said to me
"Here is different, but I expect you could handle this" in the night, no internet and no games. Bored, at least I could play online games from Mom's computer. Mom give me my laptop, its a tiny laptop but I loved to used it only its monochrome. I played my game strike fleet, a game that Uncle Los gave me, Aunt Deb boyfriend. He always said to me "games can be an education as well but not addicted to it" I begin to write my diary inside my laptop. It gives me at peace. It was already late night I begin to sleep, in secret I look at Natalie's pics and remember her words "I don't want you wank at someone else picture" I begin to remember my moments with her. Yikes my brother is waking up. Please don't wake up, reading comics and went to sleep.
The next day, we went together in the stationary shop but Dad had urgent call and Mom is alone again. That old man, why the hell he suddenly left us just as he forces us to be together. Mom look sad but I said to her
"Come one mom, lets us get done with and head to the beach"
"Alright, we visit Tanjung Aru beach ok"
After we bought all for school, we head to the beach. We hang around at the park right next to the beach. Hana and Sam was playing in the park while I look after them. Mom made a phone call with Aunt Deb. while looking after them, a girl at my age was also with her brother. She introduce herself
"I m Siti, you?"
"Alex…"
"Do you want me to speak in English?"
"Both will be fine"
"Yeah, I kinda bad with English but I loved talking about it"
"Yeah…"
She is short and slight darker skin compared to me, she looking after her brother because her parents open a stall next to the park.
"My parents sells snacks would you like some"
"Sure.."
She ran off asking me to look after her brother. She give us a cob of corn.
"We make the best corn there is.."
It is delicious, different though compare I eat in America. She wear her hijab and smile at me. She ask me
"Where do you live?"
"15 km from here"
"Which school you going?"
"I'm new here not sure where it is"
Siti smile at me interest. At least her family is together. Mom called us that is time to return home. I saw what sickens me that Dad brought his second wife for a date. I tell Mom that is time to go home, and pulled her while avoiding Mom seeing Dad. I'm not sure if Mom see that how she would react. I'm not taking chances. I saw dad was happy together with his second wife, then what is the reason we came back? So he wanted to show off!? Damn it, I knew that this is going to happen. The second I punch that old man, I knew I lost his trust. We went into the car and ask Mom just look at the front.
"Drive mom, let's go back"
"What's the rush Alex?"
"Bored with beaches already…"
"I saw you, talking to the girl at least you socialising"
"Whatever…"
"I know Mom make this drastic decision to return back but Insyallah Allah will guide us…"
"Insyallah"
In my heart, I wanted Mom to move away from this awful place. Just the 4 of us together. I just hated the idea of going back. Once we reach home, Mom making dinner, while waiting for dad. I help Mom with Sam and Hana cleaning up. Dad arrive before Magreb, he arrived and called us.
"Sorry about that, I just got a called to a meeting"
"Yeah…its alright"
"Whats with that tone Alex…I have been patient with you…"
Dad pulled my arm. I'm pissed and wanted to punch him but he suddenly pulled back, his eyes tells me that he is scared of me. He suddenly look away from me and said to Mom
"How's the stationary shop?"
"Yeah its fine…everything in order…"
"Ok then let us have dinner together…"
"Alex, help Mom prepare dinner"
I called the two to take a seat at the dining table. While I help Mom preparing food, when the food is ready. We sat together and dad lectured me
"Did you pray?"
"Do I look like I sitting down doing nothing?"
"At least pray Alex, we'll wait for ya"
"Nah, I not hungry, I going to my room"
"Alex, its not nice telling dad like that we'll wait for ya"
I become irritate with Mom, which I lost my patient with them.
"I told you, I'm not hungry!! I going to pray!!"
I went straight to the toilet taking my wuduk and praying for Magreb prayers and just laying down on my bed. I'm really pisses, that I lose my appetite because of it. The look on dad's face with his second wife really pissed me off. Damn it. I open my laptop and begun writing my journal in the computer. Someone knock on the door, and it was dad.
"Its time for isyak prayers, let us off to the mosque"
"fine…"
I change my clothes, for prayers in the mosque and I brought Hana with me together. I wanted her to learn and experience as well praying together what it feels like.
Hana wore a cute prayer robe, she smile at me "big brother…" Dad drive the car and reach the mosque. Hana always clinging to me.
"Big brother don't get really far from me..okay?"
"Yeah don't worry I'll right here…"
Hana went inside another room that only for muslimah (muslim women), I met the next door neighbour who was always praying in the mosque. I felt relieved with her along by. And join the in the front. Lots of old people and young kids below my age pray at this place. Teens however is nowhere to be seen. I saw from a far they were hanging around outside the mosque, loitering and smoking like gangster. Ain't that a familiar sight. After we done our prayers, I look for Hana and she is with the neighbour, I saw she brought a Quran with her and ask her.
"Do you know how to read the Quran?"
"Yes, I'm a teacher"
"Would you teach us both, me and Hana?"
"Yes, I'm interested after Magrib prayers come to my place, do you have muqaddam?"
"Yeah.."
"I will pay the fees"
"Don't worry about that, I love children that is interested in learning the Quran, and besides Hana told a lot about you, teaching her how to pray. What a kind big brother you are"
I did not said anything and thanked her. I did learn Quran when I was in the states when an Iman that always prayed in the musolla teach me how to read the Quran. When we wait for dad at the car. He drive home and we did not say anything at all. Maybe because I was angry at dad just now maybe that is the reason that he did not wanted to talk to me, or he is still scared at me. When we arrived at home, Mom was waiting for us and make us the 'teh tarik' but seeing my dad in front of me, I just head straight to my room. It was already midnight and Im really sleepy, I started to close my eyes and head to bed. Maybe this is what it feels like a broken home.
The day after day listening to dad's rantings, he finally said that he returning back to his second wife home. Finally at peace, tomorrows is school. I went out again, and this time I'm alone, since Hana is sleepy. I decide to walk into the deep bushes, stepping into the jungle without any awareness but leaving myself in wonders with nature. I walk deep which was an endless trees and bushes. I feel free, from the house. I tried to climb trees, and hiking hills until I reach the top of the hill. I climb the tree again and saw my Mom house from a far. I look at the sunset, it was beautiful, I remember the last I look at this sunset with Natalie in Lake Horton in the states. Time move slow here, I breathe the clean air, listen to the wind. Hearing wild boars from afar, I know wild boars are dangerous when they are in herds. The one that I was in awe is the a V formation of storks returning back to their nest. A beautiful sight, it's time for me to return home. Landed from the trees, I encounter Zuan and his friend they surprised to see me here.
"Hey Alex, what are doing here in this jungle?"
"Nah just watching the view from the trees"
"Man, you sure are brave, meaning that you went through that thick bushes there?"
"Yeah, Its fun…"
"You are something…"
"This Boy, Erie, Yan, Winie and Mira"
"Im Alex, Man's son"
"Owh the old man, I never thought a family was here"
"Alex maybe next time we come to your house and invite you to join us"
"Alright…"
"We always exploring the jungle here"
"Yeah will do but I need to back, I got Quran class after this."
"Hey wait don't just waltz in there"
I did not listen and run straight towards the bush, remembering the pathway I took. Upon reaching there Mom was picking wild ferns and she said "this is great for veggies" I still remember when Natalie shoved cabbage to my mouth. What a moment, but I forgot to check on the email. Maybe after Quran class I check the email using dad's computer. After Quran class, I head straight to dad's computer room, and check my email. Which was a dozen of message. Natalie was one of it including my friends. Natalie took a picture of her having fun with Jennifer her close friend. Really cute, she is wearing tampered jeans and Oxford shoes with her curly French style hair. Would always healed me. I smile and I've also seen Matt taking pictures of Natalie together with them. I feel relieved but also distant between them. Mom said to me
"that is some good friends you have there…"
"Yeah…I miss them…."
"But at least you write to them…"
"When the wifi will be ready?"
"Alex, Malaysia is not like the states, they still not fully develop maybe until Uncle Usman install the wifi, okay"
"Yeah, I haven't met my cousin yet"
"Well, maybe this weekend we will them and also I wanted to visit your grandma in Long Pasia"
"Yeah, I haven't meet since we move to the states"
"But, just bear with me for now okay?"
"Fine.."
"Well good night son"
She kiss me to my forehead and I hug her
"I will protect you mom, and Hana with Sam…"
"Yeah I know you will…"
I look at Damien's message
Yo homie,
How's Malaysia I heard its pretty hot that place is just like Mexico. I'm happy here, working with dad. Hiew's father was looking for you and wanted apologise for everything that happens, it turns out that Hiew's manage to survived the shoot out. What a miracle, he is change boy after that incident. He wanted to apologise you for what has happen. He also apologise to Natalie, owh boy you got rival here. Hiew fell in love with her. But don't worry, you power rangers buddy is protecting her. I heard the story between your family from Natalie sorry I poke really deep this time, I never knew you were hurt badly. Homie, like always be gangsta for life homie. Don't be a stranger, you stronger than me bro, that little body of yours I'm pretty sure you doing just fine. Whatever it is we brothers okay.
Hear you back soon
Damien
Damien, damn man, tears flows through my eyes. I had really good memories there, I never knew my heartache now, shit I'm a guy, I'm not going to cry. I close the computer and prepare myself to bed. I slowly look at Natalie's picture, damn turns me on… goodnight to me.
The next morning I woke up, together with Hana we entered the school. I wore my uniform where I had to wear neck tie. It feels choking. Mom sent us outside of the school entrance while bringing Sam to her workplace. This is it school.