I closed my mouth not knowing what to say. She had every reason to hate me, and that I couldn't deny. I left her in the dutch after all our best friend rites.
"Would you let me in? Your guards don't want me in."
"Why should I let a betrayer in?"
Thud
My heart banged hard in my chest. I hadn't expected her to be so harsh with her words, at least if I was reborn eight months ago, Jeraldine should still be Jeraldine. Why was she so different?
About to talk, Jeraldine drove past me like I was nothing. I stood in the cold for an hour, shivering and explaining to the guards to just let me in. It was too far to return back to the Rodriguez estate and more so, what guarantees me that I would be let in when perhaps Melissa would have taken over.
I lost hope persuading the guards and I turned my back, ready to walk down a bit and find a cozy shade when I was called back.
"You can enter," He said, bringing out his umbrella and raising it over my head. His once ugly demeanor shifted as if he was afraid that I would be cold.
I stood there flabbergasted as these were the same men who made mockery of me, and were the same men suddenly caring about me like I was some fragile being.
Could it be that Jeraldine changed her mind?
I walked hurriedly under their umbrella and allowed them to escort me into the estate. I gaze round the surrounding, asserting how everything was. Soon I was left at her porche with the umbrella.
I knocked and the door creaked open, revealing Jeraldine in a cozy, winter cap and fur cloak. She calmly blinked her eyes and let me in.
"I know I hate you but I can't let you stay outside. What if you die? Who would be responsible for your death." I smiled, joyfully hugging her neck.
I was right! Jeraldine didn't change a bit. She might be angry with what I have done to her and how I treated her, but there was one thing Jeraldine couldn't help doing, which was helping people in need.
She pushed me into her house and told me to sit on the chair while I waited for her to get something to drink. As she left, I stared at the huge portrait in front of me. The blooming evidence of our friendship.
This was three years ago when the road to our friendship just began. We were in college, and that picture was taken at our graduation. From then on, we always had small portraits of both of us wherever we stayed.
Soon, she came back with a smoking hot coffee in a blue mug. She gave it to me, and angrily sat away from me.
"Don't you owe me something? Like an apology?" She glared ragingly at me. I sat in, smiling and giggling like a little girl. "Do you think it is funny? I am not playing Rachel Rodriguez!" Coldly, she addressed me by my full name.
I snapped back knowing that she had completely thrown away our friendship for her to call me by my full name. I dropped the laughter elsewhere, and held her shoulders. I felt her flinch from my touch in disdain and I didn't mind.
"I am sorry Jeraldine. I know I have been an asshole for treating you like this. When I find the chance to tell you the truth, I will. But for now, accept my apology."
"That is better," She sighed, relaxing back into the chair and crossing her legs, changing the channel. "When you are done drinking, I have pizza in the oven, you can have it."
"Thanks…" I kept quiet from them on, sipping the tea in and casting short glances at Jeraldine. She was so calm and didn't bother asking me about the truth I was talking about. "Aren't you curious about the truth I am talking about?" I had to ask, closing the gap between the both of us.
I observed as she rolled her eyelids, and looked at me.
"Do I still need to ask you what you mean by it? You said you will tell me when it is time. I trust you, so tell me whenever you are ready."
"Why do you trust me so much after…?" I paused because I couldn't tell her that in the earlier future she would be murdered and basically everything was my fault. I bit my lips, as I stared into her crystal green eyes.
They were so pure, and nothing deceiving about it. Then- just then, did Melissa's green eyes also pop in my mind. Her last words before leaving the bar echoed in my head.
I just realized that there was no difference between Melissa and I. We both misused the word 'trust' to our own benefits.
"Hey, stupid! I trust you because you are my bestie. Now snap out of it, and go warm up with something to eat." She commanded me and I felt grateful to her. I went into the kitchen and set the microwave to five minutes.
I opened the freezer to get the frozen pizza only to see a huge card hidden between the freezer and the wall. I tore open the gift nylon, and read the card.
{Happy wedding Rachel}
I twitched my lips wondering why Jeraldine was wishing me a happy marriage, as she was the same person who hated my marriage with Alex. I rushed to the living room with the card and dropped it for her.
"You found this? I wanted to throw it in the trash but…lol, I couldn't. It is for you. I was to give you after your wedding reception but you didn't invite me, so ridiculous, am I right?" She chuckled in pain. I gazed at her, guilt biting me deeply.
After all I did to her, she still had the heart to wish me a happy wedding. Who else would have such pure heart to do that?
"Why don't you hate me, Jeraldine? I don't get it. I treated you badly, I snubbed you and called you a traitor. Everything I did, you still welcomed me with open hands, why?" I had to ask before guilt ate me.
If I was the one Jeraldine did this to, I will never forgive her yet she forgave me so open heartedly.
"Everyone makes mistakes. I know you were only influenced by Melissa. I know I opposed your wedding but if it is what you want, there is nothing I can do to stop you. I just hope you are making the right choice." She spoke calmly, looking at me to see I would flare up at her but I didn't.
I sat back on the couch and grabbed onto the wedding card, shredding it into pieces. She smiled, as the papers were ripped into pieces right in her front.
"I don't want to wed him again. I want to divorce him."
"I knew you'd come to your senses sooner or later. At least you did it before things got ugly and someone died in the process." Jeraldine burst into laughter, not understanding the weight of her words.
Yes, someone died…but this time around, I will make sure no one dies.
"Jerladine, I won't ever make that mistake! From now on, I am starting afresh and I am going to start with a divorce."
I nodded my head to show how serious I was and the next minute, Jeraldine passed me her cellphone and pointed at the dialing pad, asking me to put Alex's number into it and call him.
I hesitated, taking deep breaths, my fingers trembling as I dialed in his number.
"Go ahead, what are you waiting for?" She cruelly voiced, pressing the call button herself. I stood nervously as I allowed it to ring.
My heart skipped a beat while seeing his number dial. I closed my eyes, visioning how Alex betrayed me and ran off with Melissa. After all I did for him! I literally brought him out from the slum and groomed him into a charming prince and he dared cheat on me!
Useless! Very Useless of him! What an Asshole.
I cussed under a single breath, clutching the phone tighter between my fingers.
'He didn't care about me! He didn't care if our unborn child died or not. Why should I care about him? He is a traitor!' I bawled my fist, reminiscing about the past.
"To show you are really ready to have your revenge, take the phone, Rachel and call off the wedding." Jeraldine ordered, not batting her eyelids. Her eyes were formed on me, giving me the ultimate courage I needed.
I didn't bother thinking twice and dialed his number when it didn't go through. Luckily, it went through this time around.
My heart pounded as I dialed Alex's number, each ring echoing my doubts and fears. The seconds felt like hours until, finally, he answered.
"Who is this? And why are you calling me at this hour?" His voice was harsh, filled with the anger I had come to know too well. But this time, I didn't flinch.
"This is Rachel." I took a deep breath, the words heavy but resolute. "I'm calling off the wedding."
There was a brief silence, then his voice came back, low and dangerous.
"What did you just say?"
"I'm done, Alex. It's over." My voice didn't waver, but inside, I was trembling. Jeraldine held my palms giving it a squeeze, as if she understood what I was facing inside. I gazed at her, and nodded my head, maintaining my firmness. "Don't bother coming to find me. Early next morning, I will have my lawyer hand you the divorce file, besides, I am helping you end what you started."
"I don't understand…Rachel, don't hang up on me. I know you are overwhelmed by whatever you heard about me or what you think you know, but I can handle this. Where are you? Let me pick you up!" His angered tone softened to a meek voice. A tone that depicted one unable to harm a fly.
I sneered internally,
"No need, it doesn't matter where I am and I don't need you to watch over me. I will hand in the ring and everything you've given me. My lawyer will do the talking with you from now on. Don't call me to plead. I am done with you, your lies and deceit, I am fed up with it. It is over!!"
"Rachel, Rachel, no, Rachel, it is not what you think!"