Chereads / Shadow Slave | Sleepless Dreamer / Chapter 71 - Unfair World (3)

Chapter 71 - Unfair World (3)

Click!

"...!"

Click! Click!

"...w-what…"

"..."

The gun's click echoed in the stillness.

Hope simply stared at the girl, watching as if this was a simple spectacle before him. He didn't even flinch at her fit of rage. But he noticed, at that moment, her heart had stopped at this disappointing outcome.

Click…

No explosion.

No recoil.

Only an empty, hollow click.

"...I…I don't…"

The girl gritted her teeth as tears poured out. Each drop reflecting the window's light in the stifling room. Her eyes dropped to the gun's safety lever.

It was certainly off.

But no bullet fired.

That fueled her rage even more.

Why wasn't it shooting?

Step.

The girl grimly took a step forward.

The next moment, the cold metal of the gun's muzzle pressed against Hope's forehead as she pulled the trigger again. Over and over and over. Click. Click. Click…

Each dry sound sending visible waves of anger through her.

But Hope's eyes calmly stayed on hers.

He didn't even pull away as her tiny hands jerked the gun with each useless pull.

'She really doesn't know how to use that gun huh.'

When Hope had first inspected the gun for any Brave Arm symbol, he had checked its magazine last. It was empty, but it appeared that the little girl had no knowledge of that. He wouldn't give a loaded gun to his particular child anyway.

She'd probably grown used to seeing all sorts of gore, death, and sins. But taking a life was an entirely different experience.

Something that was missing in her eyes when she first pointed the gun at him.

How that would take a toll on her he didn't know. Was that something to lecture about?

'Perhaps.'

The concept of killing should be taught for this environment.

But…

"...you…" The girl mumbled.

Each unspoken word Hope kept to himself, doubt seeped into her teary expression.

"Sniffle…you're j-just pretending! You'll hurt me. You will, you will, you will!"

She squeezed her eyes shut as if to shut the whole world out. Her knees buckled as she folded in on herself, dropping the gun. Her body shuddering like an uncontrollable cold gripping her.

"I…hate this…" Her sobs cut between her words. "I…I hate this…why…why am I still crying…"

She rubbed her face against her arms.

"...stop crying…stop crying…"

Hope sat back on his heels as she balled herself up like a worm. An act to shrink away from danger even if it was pointless.

'Can't stop tears that want to be seen, kid.' Hope nonchalantly thought.

As the seconds ticked on by, Hope didn't reach out to her. 

Didn't touch her. Didn't feel inclined in the slightest to embrace her.

Although it seemed logical to take on that sort of initiative, that nature did not tease Hope's instinct in the slightest. Especially since her hatred was obvious when they first met.

But this situation was starting to…

'Sob…sob…Why did you do it, Hope…?'

"..."

The sight of the little girl sobbing began to blur with the memory of his own sister crying at his feet. It wasn't the type of tears caused by sibling banter. But the ones that pulled at self-reflection. Of guilt. The worst kind.

'Why can't you just come with me?'

'Hope, please! I said please…'

Hope hung his head low at the intruding memory.

'Let's go…I wanna go…please can we go–'

"Sigh…" Hope rubbed the back of his neck. 'I hate this too.'

The little girl's sobs and his sister's stuffed both of his ears. Two separate sounds tortuously overlapping off-pitch taht strained his mind.

Yes yes. So what if she reminded him of his little sister? Hope doubted that comforting her would be the same as comforting Yura. For one thing, one had to grow up and take care of her brothers. For the other, one had to only worry for herself as her older brothers took care of her.

Hope stared intently at the ground.

He just had to focus on the present. That was all.

Focus on the present.

Focus on the damn present.

'Ah dammit.'

But whenever Hope stared back at the girl, his eyes clouded over.

The image of his sister clinging onto him played so vividly that he felt his home's wooden floor again and her tugs on his ankles. Another feeling also pulsed in his chest—a pain that was like a heavyweight. A sickening urge to vomit from these swirls of emotion.

Before Hope continued with that thought, the next voice spoke.

'Hope, please understand…'

Hope flinched.

Ah. That familiar nurturing voice instead spoke in tremors.

'Mm…mother.'

But why was she crying?

Her voice spoke as if from a void in his memory. Likely from a time when he closed his eyes and pretended to be asleep.

A time when his mother cried at his bedside.

Right. The weight of reality was overwhelming for her many times. And Hope's pathetic child self didn't understand it.

'I'm doing the best I can…I'm r-really…trying…'

'I'm trying the best for all of us—'

'Yeah yeah I know.' Hope shrugged his backpack off. 'I'm the last person to be qualified for this.'

The girl's sobs immediately hushed at the sound of his movement. She uncurled herself and looked up at him with her red-rimmed eyes. That Adam boy also had a teary expression at one point, but not like this. Although, Hope doubted if any of his words helped the boy.

Hope pulled out a bottle from his backpack which had barely enough after her brothers drank some. But Hope noticed that she didn't give herself the chance to.

Pop.

Without a word, Hope unscrewed the cap and set it in front of her.

She looked warily at it.

'Tsk. It's not a bomb.'

But there was no need to judge her skepticism. Even if her brothers seemed more or less convinced that he wasn't a soldier, her suspicions weren't brushed aside. At least, from the type of soldiers from this city.

The view of soldiers was tarnished in this city to the point that hanging them seemed to be an achievement. Although Master Leda and her group won the favor back in Sector Two, Hope supposed if soldiers had meddled in this city's affairs, then their manners would be worse than the ones from his own upbringing. Dogs and pigs people had called them.

Whatever the hell pigs were.

'And I'm a soldier myself.'

But there was no need to convince the little girl that he was 'special' or 'different' from the others.

At this point, he had his share of blood on his hands.

And he didn't see himself having any higher moral ground.

Crrr…

Hope pushed the bottle closer to her.

Empty words wouldn't work. Sometimes listening was enough. Not for one to be a saint.

But the girl's words echoed in his mind:

'Why did my brothers and I have to be born in this world?'

'Honestly, kid, everyone is asking themselves that question.'

"Hey, kid."

"...?"

The only thing Hope could offer was the next course of action.

"I'll have the Fat Guy tied up for you guys. He has a Healing Aspect you all could use remember? It be a waste of he's dead. However, you get him to use his ability is up to you."

"But he–!"

"He's still useful." 

To them at least. For Hope? The guy was useless. Hope had to heal his injuries with a needle and thread instead.

Hope's vision slowly blurred again as he stared back at her.

Hope narrowed his eyes at the interjected memory.

'That's not my sister.' Because they believed in two different things.

"Everyone should die right?"

"...h-huh…?"

"Every man like these here should die. All those monsters. Me included. So, if you want to take revenge on people like them—"

Hope stood up.

"Just know that the world's not ending."

Meaning that there was no need to rush in spilling blood.

There were other priorities to take place. Like her siblings.

"...you don't know anything about me."

"You're breathing. Human. That's enough."

"Argh…" The scowl returned on ehr tear-stained face.

"Hate me all you want, kid. Even if I helped you doesn't mean I'm any less worse but we had a deal."

She frowned and tilted her head in puzzlement. "You're…really not faking it are you…? Well…I still hate you…"

Hope blinked.

Then looked away.

He couldn't say to her that her hatred was misplaced. She wouldn't be the first nor the last.

Afterall, emotions played a pivotal role in one's will to live. Whether it was the growing desire to protect their loves ones, or the blood thirst for revenge. Or to be the strongest. It was all a coin toss that either lengthened their journey in life for many years to come, or for a short one. A short pitiful one.

It was one of many motivational factors, and in this case, it was hers for her and her brothers.

But she had forgotten it. The little girl was experiencing a slight bump in the road as they would say. Hope supposed there was no harm in giving a small push back in her direction.

The little girl stared at the water bottle with a long silent debate.

Eventually, her parched throat won out as she snatched it and drank in frantic gulps.

Hope observed her for a moment. If there was any way to calm down a person, it was with a beverage or food. Handing pieces of bread to his sister settled her tears. And handing a glass to his mother relaxed her worries. Same thing with his commanding officer and her coffee. Huh. Then there was his teammates' gluttony–

'Nevermind that.'

Hope's thoughts were going on a tangent.

He turned and walked back over to the Fat Guy again. The main task at hand.

'Hmm. Cutting the tendons wouldn't be ideal.'

There was the case of him bleeding out.

If anything, breaking bones was the least fatal choice.

'He's not an Awakened. Obviously. So since he's not in the Dream Realm, that means he could wake up when I break–'

Hope paused as another memory figure flashed across his eyes.

Ah that guy. The Prince whatever Awakened guy that Hope put to sleep. Not that Hope was worried about him, but he was definitely awake by now.

'What does he even remember if he tries to recall?' Hope paused. 'I won't have to use it again on him right?'

"Are you getting revenge?"

'Hmm?'

The girl flinched from Hope glancing back. She looked down at the bottle. "You said you needed to get to…somewhere…is that why you want to see the Awakened?"

Huh. He could already feel the hidden line-up of questions. Well, she wouldn't remember this conversation anytime soon.

"I guess it will play a role. I am helping my teammates from another group."

Hope wasn't particularly motivated by revenge. Or any other passion. He just had to go after them because he was initially responsible for them. That was enough. 

But adding on to this situation.

Hope supposed it would be a little bloody once he got there. There would be plenty of reasons for 'revenge' once he sets eyes on what they've done to his teammates.

That thought made the tips of his fingers cold.

His motivation was simple. To get his teammates to safety. Escape this damn city once and for all and then—

'And then…'

An uncomfortable feeling stirred inside his chest.

There was the entire future to thing about.

'Let's not think about it. Not my problem right now.'

Hope grabbed the Fat Guy's ankle and knee.

The little girl spoke again. "You don't look like you're tying him up."

"Not yet." Hope paused. "You wouldn't want him to run away when he wakes up right?"

"No." She answered coldly.

"Exactly."

Snap!

Hope counted to five seconds before moving on to the next leg. He figured the method he should use was to actively use his power in the process to not wake this guy up. Simple.

'This ability is proving more useful.'

For some reason that thought produced a bitter taste in his mouth.

"Hey, kid."

"Yes…?"

"Before you do anything rash like that again. Putting your life on the line like that." Hope sighed. "Think of your brothers."

"W-what are you–!"

"If you don't want to take it from me that's fine. But ask yourself instead and listen carefully to your answer. Would your brothers want you acting this way if it meant leaving them alone?"

Her face flushed. "What would you know! You have a brother or something?"

"..."

Hope frowned as an annoying face forcefully pressed upon his vision. A face that looked much like their mother. But the eyes and attitude much like their father.

How annoying.

"Something like that."

Snap!

***

The smell of rust, dew, and rot filled the air as they finally walked outside again.

"I'm only taking you up here. I can't go too far…"

"Alright."

Hope couldn't imagine how her brothers were reacting now form her long absence, especially since Hope told her to lead the way immediately before she returned.

But Hope's job was done so they weren't his problem anymore.

He had already broken the joints from the Fat Guy and tied him up next to the tree outside the building. So whenever they needed healing, they could drain his powers dry.

Hope also decidedly not to touch any of the men's supplies in the end. Except for one thing that wasn't food.

But speaking of supplies or inventory.

'My shield has repaired a bit…?'

The memory replayed in Hope's mind when he struck one of the men's arms. The cracks were slightly less, and the splintering reflection was more unified compared to before. Still marred, but its appearance had improved the more Hope recalled back on it.

If that were true, then the answer to repairing his Memories was to let them rest inside his soul.

Something he couldn't fucking do himself.

The claw marks from the Fallen Creature reminded him of that.

'At least I don't have to threaten the Awakened anymore to repair it.' One less problem to worry about. And one that wouldn't have worked anyway.

But at the moment, the sky surprisingly lightened up. It was as if the period of rain was all a joke, a tantrum thrown for the majority of the day before the sun said its goodbye. The mist and rain reeled back, and the clouds dissipated most of its thick layers. Maybe the moon would also show tonight for Hope to restore the [Pearls of the Moon]'s power.

Hope stared up at the jagged sky.

The dark weather sure had confused the time of day earlier. But with the setting sun out, Hope calculated he had about half an hour to spare.

'Not enough time to travel.'

Half an hour before repeating the long hours of the night on some roof or safe attic from any guaranteed danger.

How inconvenient.

"It's over here." The girl called back as she climbed up a fire escape.

Hope followed after till the reached the second story and her finger pointed to a distant apartment building. One of many that sat at the feet of the leaned towers.

They were finally close enough that the sight was more imposing.

'So damn tall.'

"Ok…you uh…there should be a family in that building over there. Ok? They have a window that leads to the next building over and…you go through a kind of tunnel that leads to…Sigh! Are you sure you've listened to all I said?"

She kept repeating back to him ever since they set off.

"Every word."

"Really? You won't forget?"

"Yes."

She narrowed her eyes. "You sure–"

"Yes."

Bzzch!

'Seriously?' 

Hope restrained a frown in front of her. It didn't help that the [Tears of Sorrow] description summoned itself in front of him. Sometimes Hope wondered was it from his thought, or from the damn Spell mocking him?

The girl scowled. "Ok then." She pointed again. "Just make sure to go into that exit."

Hope blinked in that direction. Then rummaged in his backpack for something.

The one thing that he took himself for was…

'Binoculars.'

Hope lifted them to his eyes and the world zoomed in like a camera.

"Will that family try to shoot me too?" Hope asked.

"Why shouldn't they?"

'Well. Fair point.' Although, the little girl didn't seem keen on proposing an idea on how to deal with that problem.

'But she's particularly chatty now compared to before.'

Hope paused as another thought came to mind.

"Have you ever used these?"

"Oh. No."

Hope handed them over to her. Her eyes slightly widened at the surprising weight of it in her weak hands. But the moment she brought them to her eyes, her back straightened and her mouth dropped.

"So close!"

Hope leaned back against the rail. "See if there are any additional traps that weren't there before."

"Oh. Um…" She but her lip as she concentrated. "There are more wires in the street. Patches next to a blue car. Oh definitely avoid that window."

"What window?"

"Just that window."

"Where?"

"Next to the other window."

"..." Hope lightly knocked her on the head as if he were knocking on wood. "Which. Window?"

She frowned. "Just..the one under a banner."

"Anything else?"

"Not really." She suddenly twirled on her heel and looked back, pointing the binoculars north were Sector Two was. The sun reflected off of the lens like shining mirrors. With the mist mostly cleared and the setting sun piercing through the slits of clouds, the familiar glass dome rooftop peeked in the distance.

'What a strange camp that was.' Hope thought as the memories replayed in his mind.

"Alright, kid. If that's it then give them back–"

"Oh wait. I see…people…?"

"It's a city. I'm sure you'll spot at least someone."

"No– Umm…They're…jumping over rooftops?"

"..."

'What?'

"What?"

"Argh! I'm saying they're coming this way!"

"..."

'The hell?'

The only people who were capable of jumping over rooftops were Awakened–

!!!

Hope's body shuddered at that moment.

No no not this feeling…

'There's no fucking way…'

It was the same feeling as before. Not necessarily fear, but the ominous instinct that he was being watched even from this distance.

"Hey wait–!"

Hope snatched the binoculars to take a look himself.

But before he did, the sun reflected again on the lens.

'No fucking wonder they saw us.' It just alerted them in their direction.

"They're…Awakened." Hope said with an annoyed sigh.

But the girl wasn't annoyed. She was terrified.

"..hu…wh…what?!"

"Gotta go, kid."

"Stop!" The girl clutched onto Hope's leg as he began climbing over the rail. "What about us?!"

"You want me to fight against them?"

"I-I saw you using a shining thing like them!"

Hope thought she did see him summoning his shield during the fight. The other Sleepers had Memories of their own. Too bad he couldn't take anything from them.

Not that it mattered now.

"Look, kid–"

"Don't go!"

Hope's eyebrow twitched. "Lower your voice. Just–"

"Wait. Please!"

"..."

"Please stay…Can't you just– Just stay please–"

At that moment, to her surprise, Hope crouched down to her level putting her words to an abrupt stop.

"Kid. I've watched them from afar before. If anything, they're more capable of helping you than me. They're–"

"No one's good. Don't say they're good!" Her eyes teared up again. "Don't tell me that! You can't name one person besides your…your teammates…that are good. Can you?"

"..."

Oddly enough, Hope thought back to that one knight from his First Nightmare.

Hope expected a couple of other people he had in mind. But maybe because that incident was recent: that someone who tried to save him did it at the cost of their life. Or maybe–

'Wait. What thoughts am I having now?'

Hope survived the First Nightmare. There was nothing more to it. The whole thing was likely a fabrication from the Spell. Nothing real.

Hope sighed as he silently cursed the memories to fuck off.

"Like I said before, kid. I'm not a go–"

"W-well at least…! At least you're honest…err…more than other grown ups that is…"

Hope frowned. Was she just blabbering whatever came to thought now? He was sure she hated him.

Hope looked up at the sky.

'She's just a kid I guess.'

"Here." Hope grabbed a broken shard from a window and placed it in her hands. "Reflect the sun in that direction so they'll see you."

"But–!"

"They'll help you, kid. And you said it yourself." Hope gently knocked on her head. "If you say I'm honest, then I'm honest."