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A Nihilists Guide to Optimism(indefinite hiatus)

Sounare
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chs / week
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Synopsis
Sine Helmuth, a popular kid at Izayoi High, Meets a Girl in the pouring rain, and thus a fateful encounter, will the girl help Sine learn how to care again? and will she be able to have someone care for her finally? (updates every 2 days ish if i stay consistent kek)
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Chapter 1 - A Fateful Encounter

Time: 5:30 pm

Location: In front of the entrance to Izayoi high

*...*

The rain continues to pour, not too heavy, but not light either. I take the same old path back home

"Another day and still no progress..."

I continue to talk with my umbrella in hand, cassually strolling while i relax to the sound of the rain.

Sniff, *sob*, Sniff

Under the relaxing sound of pouring rain i pick up the sounds of soft crying as i walk

I look to the direction of the crying and realized i know this person.

"May?"

I continue to walk toward her my footsteps making wet sounds thanks to the rain, allerting her to my presence.

May then glances up to my umbrella, then looking at me with a devastated face.

"What do you want?.... Just leave me alone...."

May asked me, with a sharp tone. Very different from what you expect from a girl who was just crying.

"..."

I stay silent for a moment. Placing the umbrella above her, and i let the pouring rain drop onto me.

"I cant do that.. not when your face is like that"

I Say that so calmly, while keeping a neutral face, which is normal after classes are done.

May looks away from me, softening her expression, atleast thats what i could tell from the side of her face.

"You wouldnt understand, nobody does"

She says in a small whisper, but with my great hearing i pick up on it, but i still let it slide

"... Thats fine but, isn't better to have someone to listen anyways?"

I tilt my head in curiosity

She hesitates for a moment, then looks back at me

"I guess... it's just that... It's like nobody cares. They all just see me as the weird loner girl."

I look at her straight in the face and thinking about it. I answer her how i usually do... Brutally honest.

"Currently i am one of those people.. so I cant console you honestly..., But still I am willing to listen"

May nods slightly, looking down at the ground

"It's okay. I'm used to it, used to this treatment I mean."

"But."

I reach out my other hand to her

" you seem... Interesting i might care for you one day if we try and see~"

May looks up, surprised by your words, but doesn't pull away from your hand

"You... might care for me?"

She asks in a curious tone

"..."

But i stay silent as i ignore the question for now

"No promises though, i also have a lot of problems. And if i try to help with yours.. i feel like it will help with mine i guess"

may looks into my eyes and realizes they look so dead

"Maybe... we can help each other. I don't want to be alone anymore."

I pull her to a cafe nearby so we could talk more..

Flashback: 10 hours ago

Izayoi high, start of classes

(Good morning I guess, The name is Sine Helmuth, 11th grade. Today is the final day of classes, our seniors graduating. And close knit classes having their final moments together.)

(But unlike most, I decided to spend the whole of my morning before my class's year end party to complete all of my missing requirements)

In front of the teacher's office

"Sigh"

I sigh loudly, dejected about some things

(I can't believe Proffesor Adrin isn't here today.... It's literally the last day of classes and I am yet to submit any of my projects)

"..."

I then took out my phone and checked my grade.

"Considering I estimate that I only did about quarter the work this time i'd expect only a quarter of of my current grade this semester.... Still gonna pass if I don't pass these projects anyways."

At some point in the past, I just roughly calculate my grade if I do fail or not. Since Izayoi High gives out the exact grading calculations I can, ahead of time. Calculate my grades so I don't get surprised

I sigh again, I wasted a lot of time doing these projects and in the end I'm not even going to pass them....

" What a waste of time.. I'll just go to the library and past the time there"

I walk to the library, which was at the center of the school. Pretty much took me just 10 minutes of walking just to get there.

"Library seems pretty vacant today... Well of course it is, this is the final day after all~~"

I sigh again, looking at the glass door for a moment, before deciding to open it and enter the library.

"I have been sighing a lot today... I guess the mask is falling a bit cause it's the last day..."

As I walk, I reminist about the happenings of this year. How univentful it was, or rather. How univentful I was for me....

"I did a lot of stuff this year huh.... Still I couldn't even make a tiny bit of progress"

I walk a bit more, and find a good desk to plop my bag on, then decided to get a book. And went off trying to find a good one

"Ahh this takes me back.."

I reminist on one such past event, our first ever thesis.

"That shit was painful not gonna lie"

I recall, one of my research members, doing everything the last minute. Holding everyone's progress back considerably, And how frustrated it made me feel.

"I'm never gonna do that again with people..."

Not as bad as this one member, but the other 3 are also a bit guilty, also doing things last minute. But around 2 days before the deadlines I gave them atleast. Unlike the fucker who did the work LITTERALY ON THE DAY WE WERE GONNA PASS THE PAPER.

"I should probably... Stop for now, I am here to relax after all. And based on that dude's event attendance track record, I doubt he'll come to this year end party anyways"

I go back to my seat placing down 3 books that caught my interest and sat down taking one of them and flipping it to the first page..

"I forgot the most important thing I need..."

I stand up, going to the cafe inside the library (yes this library is huge as fuck and has a cafe inside it lmao) I went to the counter and ordered a doppio.

I payed, and waited a few minutes for the coffee to be ready.

"A doppio for Customer Sine"

The counter lady calls, and I stand up and pick up the coffee, and the lady thanks me for coming.

I open the lid and take a whiff of the coffee and take a sip

"Still tastses pretty good. This should suffice for reading one of the books"

I walk back to my desk Taking a few sips of my coffee thinking about some thing's

"I still don't know how.. But I can still live off just a shot of espresso a day and 6 hours of sleep, for a whole year. And still... Why did I have to be in the morning schedule of classes..."

(Info dump about Izayoi High)

Izayoi High has a limited amount of proffesors and a huge number of students. Just the 11th year alone has 1000 students with only 10 proffesors. And since our rooms are small, at most one class has at most, 40 students(some classes have less), and since there's 30 different classes from 11-1 to 11-30 classes 11-1 to 11-15 are in the morning schedule from 7am to 12nn, and 11-16 to 11-30 are from 10am-3pm.

"And to think i'm one class away from getting into the afternoon schedule..."

Sine's class is 11-15, so he was so close to being in the afternoon schedule. As the Classes are assigned based on the enrollment date

"Student number 20**-00629"

The student number goes by "the year of enrollment"- then by "the order of enrollment", the student number is the main way of identification in Izayoi high. And is also the name of the school given email. Which include the free premium subscriptions offered by the school, and is the only way to submit homework as such it's important for every student to remember their student numbers.

(This is the end of the info dump, skip here if ya want, the info is mostly for world building purposes, it should not be important to the story)

(...probably)

I take a seat at my desk, Continuing to read the book I left before I gone out to get some coffee.

I read through the book, speeding through at a decent pace, and time to time sipping some coffee, to relax while I pass the time.

3 Hours later. 11:30 am, 30 minutes before the Year end party starts.

I close the book after completely finishing it.

"I Finished the book. But I still have two I have yet to read."

I glance at the two books.

"I'll just have to borrow them for the summer then."

I stand up, taking my the three books with me, my bag, and the empty cup of coffee.

As I walk to the front counter, I toss the cup in the correct trash can and put the finished book on the return pile.

I plop the two books in the counter, and call out to the librarian.

"Good morning Ms. Librarian, I want to borrow two books."

The old lady then looks behind her, still busy with the leftover paper work.

"Oh Sine? Here again, Even at the last day of classes you still come here to the library."

The old lady walks to the counter holding two peices of paper

"My my. As expected of one of my two regulars. Quite a interesting book I see. It's nice to see youngins like you enjoy a good read"

The old lady smiles at me, looking at me like some sort of grandchild

"Can you put in the first day of classes as the day of return, and also since I still don't know if I am going to be in the morning or afternoon schedule next term. Can you please put the return time to 5pm?"

(Students. Again Enroll at the 12th grade, so Sine is not so sure if he'll be able to get into the schedule he wants to be in.)

I asked politely, and explained my reason for the time of return.

"And also, One of the two?"

I ask bewildered, as its been year of being a regular in the library, and this is the first time I heard about another regular.

"... I see, then I shall put at as the return date"

She then writes down the date and time of return on both peices of papper, then signs them. And sticks them to the first pages of the.

"As for the other regular. you shall find out eventually~"

The old lady grins gleafully. Looking at me with teasing eyes.

"Oh, Then I'll be off. I still have a year end party to attend, thank you for letting be borrow these books for the summer"

I decided to not pursue the matter further, and just walked away, going to the direction of my classroom

The old lady just waves goodbye, grinning more as she thinks about something

"I sure do hope those two end up together~"

The old lady thinks, how nice it would be if these two lonely souls end up with each other.

Time: 12nn.

Location: Class 11-15's classroom

I enter my classroom discretely, as I begin to contemplate if I should be here even.

"Oh. You came!"

A tall young man greets me as I enter the classroom, getting everyone's attention.

"Sup pres, of course I'll come. It is our final day together as a class after all.."

I fake a smile, looking at him directly.

"It's fine man, we understand you wanna enroll for the afternoon sched, and us the morning. Don't sweat it."

Pres pats my left shoulder repeatedly as he tries to comfort me.

"Thanks. For your understanding."

I smile at them, not wanting to leave them hanging, my classmates did support met throughout the year.

"Now come on and join the party, Enjoy it."

Pres smiles at me, then walks back to the front to oversee the party.

I then proceed to socialize with the many acquaintances in my class. And part with them to pass the time.

Time: 3pm

Location: Class 11-15's Classroom

The party dies down a bit, after eating the food, the president goes in front and proceeds to get out attention.

"Alright everyone, come to the front and lets have one last picture as a whole class"

The whole class then groups up to the front, and we get a bystander to, take the picture for us.

"One, two, three, Say cheese"

Everyone: cheese

"Click"

And that concludes the year end party of class 11-15.