Twyla stopped breathing and just stood there for a long while, frozen. What now? She took a deep breath. It didn't help. It just made her heart race and her palms sweaty. Sofia's bed was made but there was no reason to panic. Sofia could have already left. Twyla checked the time. 6 am. Nope. Even Sof never left this early. Okay okay. Maybe the shower? Twyla walked into their shared bathroom. Bone dry. Was her heart trying to escape her chest? There had to be a reasonable explanation. Twyla went back into Sofia's room. Her book bag was gone. There were some things Sofia never went anywhere without. And all those things were in her book bag. Things like her special pen and the book she was currently reading.
Maybe she got locked in a library. That could happen, right? She could have fallen asleep studying and no one noticed when they closed up for the night. Sofia was tiny. Easy to miss…
Twyla paced around their apartment. She fidgeted. Sofia was the responsible one. Sofia was the one who left cute little notes to say where she was all the time. Sofia was the one who messaged all the time. Twyla was always the one who forgot to message or left something behind. At least now Twyla knew how Sofia felt…
A message! Maybe there was a message! Twyla raced to the counter.
Disappointment was colder than the marble floors.
But it did give her an idea. An idea she really should have thought about. However, it was only 6 am.
Ring ring.
"Come on, Sofia. Pick up."
Ring ring.
By the time the voicemail answered the fourth time, Twyla gave up. Sofia was not going to answer her phone.
After another hour of pacing, Twyla refused to sit and wait around. She stomped onto the campus grounds and in the direction of the library lawns. What else was she supposed to do? The university was already awake with students picnicking on the grass and catching up from the night before. People exchanged notes on the stairs while asking questions about physics and philosophy. She greeted some friends and inquired about Sofia. None of them had seen her since the last time they had all hung out. It didn't narrow down her list of places to look. She supposed she should just look in all the libraries then. Luckily as a history major, she had access to most libraries, so she stepped into the first one: maths and sciences. This was where Sofia got all her resources but it was also the noisiest so she didn't always stay here for an extended period. And as Twyla gazed over the balcony unto the study cubicles below, it was clear that Sofia hadn't stayed her if she had even come here at all. Twyla marvelled at some plants under a dome before moving on to the next one. This one had a skeleton at the front that everyone high-fived. There was metal holding it together now…
As she ran out of libraries, Twyla's panic grew. No one had seen Sofia. And with all those news reports of those people getting murdered…
Twyla started hyperventilating. What was happening to her? She wasn't emotional. Maybe she just needed to sit down.
She found a secluded bench covered in a tree that flowered little purple teardrops.
"And innnn. And ouuuuut. And innn. And ouuuuut. Okay. What do I do now? Call Sofia's parents?"
Twyla burst out laughing. Sofia's parents were out of the country somewhere. They were always travelling and rarely told Sof where they were going. They just dumped a bunch of cash on her and left. Twyla's parents were… out of the picture. Twyla wasn't sure where they were, to be honest. She had last seen them when she finished school. They popped in to see if she was alive and then left. Twyla made her own way.
"I guess the cops?" Twyla asked herself.
Talking to herself had become one of her coping mechanisms over the years and it kept her sane.
Twyla got up and traipsed up to the police station.
Her eyes went higher and higher as she took in the police building. It loomed over her. Harsh laughter crashed out of a window with the smell of sweat and cigarettes. They had an open-door policy and their door was technically open but the razor wire fence and metal detector said something else.
Well. She was here now. She knocked and walked straight in with her head up.
The man at the front sat at a raised platform, just like a judge and, damn, did she feel judged.
He raised an eyebrow.
"Hi," her voice betrayed her by squeaking. She cleared her throat. "My friend is missing."
"Oh really?"
What? How was she supposed to respond to that?
"Yes! She didn't come home last night and she always comes home and she always messages and she's never done this. She always messages. She was studying late and - "
"Studying, eh?" he had the nerve to smirk.
"YES."
"I'm sure she's just off with some boy. You're wasting police time."
"I.. I… but… the news…"
"Leave before I charge you with uh… something."
He didn't even care enough to come up with a charge.
Twyla backed out of the station.
The next thing she knew she was in her apartment trying to process what happened. How could the cops not care? They were supposed to be there to help?
Twyla didn't feel panic anymore. She didn't feel anything.
Beep Beep
Work alarm.
There was nothing else Twyla could do. If the cops couldn't, no wouldn't, do anything, what was Twyla supposed to do? She should just wait for Sofia to message back. She always did, right? Maybe her phone was stolen? And she got lost? Maybe, she did go home with a person?
Twyla pulled on some clothes. It ended up being a tight black tank and shorts. She felt like she was on spring break.
Thankfully, customers came in droves and Twyla was on her feet the entire evening. Sofia was on the edge of her mind at all times but she couldn't panic. She did end up selling a fair number of books about friendship…
The real challenge came when she went back to their dark, lonely apartment. The crescent moon bounced slivers of light off mirrored surfaces creating monsters in the corner of her eyes.
She did not sleep.
Twyla did not want to think about it but, as she dragged her aching body out of bed, she finally let herself say it out loud.
"Sofia is not here for my birthday."
In the 10 years they had known each other that had never happened.
10 years.
Twyla once had to bicycle from one side of the city to the other to make Sofia's birthday. Sof once climbed out of a window, broke her arm, ran to Twyla's and they celebrated Twyla's birthday before Sofia got her arm fixed. It was dumb, sure, but they don't miss birthdays. It was their way of celebrating their friendship.
Sofia would not miss it.
Twyla could not pretend nothing was wrong. She had to find out what had happened to Sofia.
She called work and took leave. Indefinitely.