Himura Satō
My mind recalls that scene earlier. Organs, vile liquids, and whatever else was shelved as if normal. Frankly, it was disgusting. "To think my first ever job will be as an organ harvester. Oh, how far I've fallen."
Usually, another voice berates me but honestly, "It just can't help." I see myself shrugging in defeat but honestly, I hate that word. Just accepting that I can't do anything about a situation is pitiable. It's a sign of weakness. Everything has a solution; I've always believed that. And if you can't, that's simply a sign of weakness.
I sit up, messing with my hair while trying to think as if it would help. I lay back down, "Ow!" And a shingle hits my back. I stare at the moon, hoping that it doesn't change suddenly. "My god man, pick an avenue, either you despise anything out of your control or you accept it!" I shout at myself.
"And how long are you planning to laze about? For someone who talked about training, all you've done is go back to the same roof and watch the stars!" Okay, but the stars are nice though. "True, but you could be stamina training or something. Just run laps at the wall or something. And no, you can't say that you'll be better as you fight more, we are barely getting by here." As much as I agree, that's a statement fueled by the need to survive.
"When we died, did we do everything that we ever wanted?" I argue in my mind. Using topic disgusted me to the core but I have to say it even if I'm doing so as a bullet against myself. "There no point to doing things for the future or the past because we are creatures of the present and that is all we would ever be," I recall what Mr. Freemor said. "You know you're contradicting yourself, right?" My voice cuts in.
I stop before recalling that memory. I stare at the stars and just let myself wonder as if one of those stars. In the end, my core belief is that experience will always beat training. In fact, I've never learned anything that I studied. Art and fighting in general were all things that I experienced.
It was also where I learned to see its value. I sigh. "I don't have to explain myself. You already know why we act the way we do." But the question is, what do I want to do in the present? I smile slightly internally, and in a child-like voice, I murmur my desire. "…" That desire is pretty much impossible but you know what?
Fuck this world and its dangers, fuck the monsters that could snap me like a twig, and most of all fuck conforming to a mold. I'm still no better than the me before arriving here. "Greedy and egotistical," I say to myself. It is true but…were it not for those evils, I would not have gotten this far. With that, I close my eyes, not caring for the future and yet looking forward to it.
I open my eyes as there was a paining ache in my back. I yawn as look upon the stars. The moon still shines normally. I sigh in relief as I look forward only to see that the ladder is gone again. I look over the edge to see the same woman closing the door on the balcony.
I wanted to wait for her to close before jumping but unfortunately, she saw me. Using my hand, I shoo her away from the balcony before jumping. Before she could speak, I jump off the balcony and enter a street. Since the moon isn't shining brightly, I just wander around the city.
I headed to the marketplace first and bought a loaf of bread and a chunk of dried meat. I eat as I walk around and eventually find myself outside of a peculiar building. Unlike other buildings, this one looked pristine and shiny like nicely polished silver. Just above the first floor was some sort of symbol which I describe as a silver-colored upside-down "T".
I left the vicinity immediately as I saw some people coming out. "I'd rather not be talked to about their God or something," I say to myself. A part of me wanted to just surrender myself to a God and hope that all of my problems would go away, but I quickly dismiss that thought.
Looking at their clothes, both men and women wore the same long flowy dark blue robe. Their symbol hung around their neck symbolizing their faith. "It might be quick to assume that it's a place of worship but I could feel it. The holiness, the feeling of being out of place, so many emotions that I feel whenever I find myself in sacred grounds."
The rest of my walk was uninteresting. This is city doesn't have much in tourist attractions. I look at the moon and surprisingly, I find myself yearning for the sun. It was my only way of being able to see and right now, I wanted to just leave. "If I stay here for too long, I fear that I will eventually become a part of their society."
I don't have much in terms of learning about this world and unless somebody were to teach me how to speak their language, I won't make much progress being here either. If I ever want to learn, my answer would lie beyond these walls.
Thoughts of adventure, learning, and survival consume my thinking as I find myself in a secluded corner of the city. I sit down at an alley where the moon didn't. It was nostalgic in the worst way possible but there was no point dwelling in that now. I close my eyes and let my worries weigh me down like a blanket until I can no longer be awake.
I find myself at the river; drinking and washing. In my bag were two loaves of bread. Honestly, I find it disgusting that I'm putting food in the same container as the bloody pouches once filled with the remains of monsters.
But I cleaned my bag and everything else in there so it should be fine. "Right?" I put my clothes back on, wrap the bandages and leather strips into my arms, and wear my gauntlets and shin guards. I then grip my blade, making sure that it's really there.
My switchblade was in my pocket. A broken spear, brown gem, pouch of coins, 2 empty pouches, and 2 loaves of bread were the only things left in my bag. The rest I cleaned out. I sigh one last time before officially going on an adventure.
I follow the river up so I know where to go back when I need to resupply. I encountered a few goblins here and there but since it wasn't nighttime, it was easy enough to kill them. Usually, I take their weapons afterward and place them in the base of a tree as a marking just in case, the river just suddenly disappears.
Hours have gone by and I notice that many of the trees aren't that tall. Most of them only need me to jump to grab a branch. The tall ones only needed me to jump from a smaller tree and it was easy enough.
Every tree in this forest also tends to curve at the top so a tall enough tree has enough curvature that allows me to lay down. Using one of the goblin's hatchets, I wedge it in a tree, acting as some sort of stepping stone. I jump forward, almost falling and eventually reaching the top.
I jump to a taller tree and climb up. Eventually reaching the top, lay down at downward curve, hoping that I don't fall. "Okay, I'm seeing a flaw in this plan. I might move during my sleep and fall down." I say to myself. As the sun goes down, I find myself bored. The moon rises and I watch it move as I nibble in a tiny chunk of bread.
Nothing about my situation was ideal, but for some reason, I find it more fulfilling. Whether it was because of my child-like wish to do this or something, I could not tell. Only time will tell of the reality of what I'm doing but until then, I'll keep enjoying this.
I closed my eyes and waited for morning, eventually, I fell asleep. But a few hours later, I snap back awake barely holding on to the tree. Heavily disoriented and feeling like my heart was grasped tightly, I could barely think. Looking below me, I could see a few goblins roaming about. I keep my mouth tightly shut and climb back up.
I kept my hand tightly on my blade, ready to strike, but in the end, they didn't spot me. I eventually calm my beating heart and continue to wait for the sun, nibbling more bread in the meantime. I open my eyes as the cold morning breeze brushes against me. This awakening would definitely be better if I woke from an actual bed.
I made my way down, somewhat shivering. I let the cold river water to wash my face, it was uncomfortable but energizing. I check if all of my items are still there and thankfully, it is. With nothing more to check about, I continue to walk up the river. After a day's worth of travel. I find myself in a ruined town.
Destroyed stone buildings overran by nature surrounded this small town. Before looking around, I look beyond the ruins. Two horn-like shapes protruded from the two hills and in between them were what looked like a huge ravine.