Nina opened her eyes the next morning with the sun shining through the window and her body was still leaning against the dark brown wooden door. The position she remembered staying in since she came back from Léon's house. Claw marks were all over the floor like some wild animal was trying to escape, escape from its mind. No wonder I felt strange as soon as our eyes met. There was something familiar about him and Nina felt it in her mind and soul. Good thing she got out of his house just in time. Nina's body was aching from laying against the door all night, yet again. Not that she used her bed often, she just wanted to be home so those nightmares could stop haunting her. And maybe finally be normal instead of being the freak everyone was afraid of. Nina stood up,
creaking her back, and walked towards the mirror that was standing next to her closet. A shiver crawled over her body when she saw her reflection. The ice queen they said she was, but in reality, she was a monster. Nina grabbed some clothes that were lying on her bed and put them on quickly so she could get some breakfast. She closed the door behind her with one hand on the door knop and the other hand was going through the hair to make it at least look a little less like a bird's nest. A voice, oh so familiar that she heard way too much stopped her in her tracks. "Nina, stop right there!"
"Bonjour Sister Jacqueline," Nina said smiling at her. Sister Jacqueline was standing there with her bible in one hand and the other hand a pocket watch. As she closed the watch, she looked at Nina, like she always has. Tracking her time every day, every second. Not losing Nina out of side, because she was the troubled child. If she disappeared, then that meant that something happened. Or Sister Jacqueline just couldn't find her Nina was always walking away from her.
"When did you get back yesterday?" Sister Jacqueline asked. See, always looking for her. She knew what she thought of her, she knew what everyone thought about her as well and sadly she had bigger problems now than looking at the clock. Nina rolled her sleeves up her arms while Sister Jacqueline looked at the wrinkles that were all over Nina's clothes. It was almost like she wanted to give Nina an iron and get started. "Well, I came back after studying with someone from school."
"You missed dinner."
Oh, that is right, Nina thought back. She didn't eat in the orphanage or even at Léon's house. She didn't even study for a small moment. Nina looked up at the high ceiling with the flowers curling around in circles.
"They invited me to dinner; they are nice people. They didn't want to bother you guys with cooking because it was going to be so late till I was home." Anything was better than telling the truth, I guess. What was she supposed to say, that she left like a crazy person and jumped down from a balcony because that guy reminded her of something? Better yet, she believed she saw herself as a wolf. Nina didn't understand what happened that day. Nina's eyes traveled from the ceiling to her hands as Sister Jaqueline walked past her. "Very well then, next time let us know beforehand." She said.
"Yes, I'm sorry."
After getting a quick breakfast, Nina headed to Eloise and Blanche who were already waiting for her at the door. The warm summer breeze and the sun reflected on Eloise's
pink sunglasses while she kicked a stone over the path. Nina smoothed down her wrinkled clothes and brushed her fingers through her hair. Eloise looked at her and pulled a hair tie from her arm. She grabbed a hold of her hair and started braiding it to the left side. Just from her happy smile, she lids up Nina's dark world. She was a walking sunshine, the brightest on earth. She stopped when she tied the bottom of Nina's hair and looked at her.
"Where is your backpack?" Eloise asked while she pulled a flower out of the ground and placed it in Nina's hair. That's right, Nina had completely forgotten about that. She didn't even know it was missing; she was too busy leaving his house instead.
"I left it at Léon's house. I hope that he brings it and then never speaks to me again."
"Why, what happened? Were you acting weird again?" Blanche grinned at Nina while Eloise handed her a flower.
"Yes," Nina answered.
"What did you do?" Eloise asked with worried eyes. She was already thinking that Nina did something terrible, that she scared him just as much as she did in the past with everyone else. That they saw a side of her she tried to hide, while Eloise only saw Nina's good side. That side Nina didn't believe she had.
"I jumped down from his balcony and ran away," Nina said like it's a normal thing people do, jumping down from the first floor. Luckily, he only had a two-story home, otherwise it would have been a lot weirder. No matter how you look at it, people don't jump down from stuff that would badly hurt them. Nina didn't want to know what he was thinking of her now, great first expression she ever made.
"What, that's dangerous!" Eloise yelled.
"I know, but nothing happened."
"Yeah, for now, but not for long if you keep doing that," Eloise said squeezing Nina's shoulders. Nina took her hands from her shoulder and walked further over the path to school. She answered Eloise once more in a soft voice, "I'm fine." Nina kicked her feet against some stones again and again. Like the stones did something wrong, the stones blocking her road or something. Like the whole world was against her. It was too easy for everyone to see that there was something wrong with her because she wasn't good at hiding it. They arrived at the school gate where Léon was waiting for her with her backpack. Ah great, here it comes. Nina took one last deep breath.
"Good luck," Blanche winked at her.
"Don't worry, everything will be fine. I'll see you after class." Eloise waved goodbye and Blanche walked towards the entrance of the building. Yeah, don't mind me being alone with the first person who officially thinks I'm weird! He made her so uncomfortable, the way her heart was pounding in her chest every time again especially after last evening. Léon walked towards her holding her bag in his hands. "You forgot this."
"Merci. I was hoping you would bring it - Nina stood there like an idiot who just wanted to run away, run from the horrible words he would say to her like everyone else always did so far. "Well, bye then." But before Nina could run away, he grabbed her arm.
"I'm not done talking." Nina froze in her tracks and turned back to Léon. Here it comes. Nina wanted to cover her ears, but it was not like that would have helped. Nina will always hear everything anyway; she just had to hear it. She turned around and looked at him.
"Just say it already," Nina demanded.
"Okay. Are you crazy, jumping from a balcony? You're lucky you didn't break a hip." His voice was deep emotional and careful. Wait, is he angry that I jumped down? Nina didn't expect to hear those words coming out of his mouth. She thought he was going to blackmail her into telling the whole school.
"I'm very athletic." She laid. But still, it wasn't a complete lay. She was indeed very athletic but only because she wasn't human.
"What happened yesterday?" Nina felt his fingers slowly moving down her arm, giving her a light squeeze. No, he wasn't just angry, it seemed like he was worried. Worried about her? -was he, did he care?
"I had a panic attack." She answered.
"Yes, I noticed," Léon said and immediately lifted her face because she'd been staring at the ground for a while now. She didn't even notice that his hand was gone from her arm and holding up her chin, looking at her with those deep eyes of his. Why was he just looking at her like that? Waiting for her to tell the rest of the story, but Nina didn't want to answer his question. It was bad enough that he already thought that she was weird. Nina just wanted to get through today without a problem, was that too much to ask?
"Why?" He asked and Nina's eyes drifted off again. His eyes were too much to look at, at this moment. Nina hesitated for a moment and finally looked him in the eyes again.
"I have amnesia!"
Nina took his hand in hers and let it fall out of her grip and quickly ran towards the school building in frustration. Do you want to know what I saw? Me and you, a little boy and a pup. And what's even worse, is me as an evil animal. How much weirder can it get? Nina slammed the door of her locker with her gym clothes in her, ready to get to the first class of the day. And there he was again, of course, of course, Nina happened to have P.E. together with Léon. Nina thought at first that this feeling she was having was still from him asking her about yesterday but as soon as she left the locker room, her eyes landed on Léon. His already standing there dressed in his gym clothing, next to another student with spiky hair who was also in one of her classes. At first, she thought that it was the whispers from the other girls in the locker room that were staring at her. Nina knew what they thought, it was that strange girl again, why do we have to have a class with her? Nina was the one that was cursed and not you guys, just from having her in your class? They didn't even know her, especially the real one, trust me when I tell you that you don't want to know. But then she would give you all the right the judge her. But she was the cursed one when she saw Léon walking towards her. So, he did notice her after all, of course, he did. "Nina, can we talk?" he asked.
"Sorry, I'm a little busy right now."
Nina walked past him and followed the rest outside to the running track. Nina could see the school guide from where she was standing while everyone lined up in front of the running track, waiting for the teacher to give the start signal. Léon followed behind Nina when she quickly took the place of another girl who was planning to run. Nina was ready to let off some steam and disappear from Léon but mostly, to beat everyone in this class. Mr. Curie blew his whistle when everyone started running. Nina immediately ran past everyone in just seconds. The wind gave her a nice breeze, while she ran in the same black shorts and gray T-shirt that every other student was wearing. The other students were only halfway while Nina was already getting closer to the finish and she wasn't even running that fast. Nina could run a lot faster if she wanted to but then it would be harder for her to stop as well. Nina would probably run through the fence of the school before she got to a stop. And just like that Nina walked past the finish line without breaking a sweat, without being tired. All the other students still had half a way to go. The teacher walked towards Nina, writing down the minutes She'd spend running on the track on his paper.
"Nina, would you like to run with the boys?" Mr. Curie asked.
"Sure, but they wouldn't be able to keep up with me," Nina said with a lot of confidence while she tied her hair up in a ponytail with all the loose hairs that were swirling around in the wind. The girls were finally at the finish line when the boys took their places. They all looked at Nina when they saw her standing at the starting line.
"What is she doing here, she knows that the boys are right now or doesn't she know what she is?" Quintin laughed. But as soon as he said that, he got hit on the head by Léon.
"Just make sure she doesn't beat you," Léon said while Quintin went with his hand through his spiky hair. Nina looked at all the boys on the starting line, they were confused and thought that she wanted to make a fool out of herself. They already thought that she was weird and now Nina just made it worse. Nina could hear them talking about her by the starting line, the freak, ice princes, and now the weirdo. She didn't belong on this earth, in this school, and even there with the boys. Oh well, they would see soon enough that she was just out of their human league. Mr. Curie blew his whistle again and all the girls started laughing and screaming at one boy in particular. The boy had gel in his wavy hair that was behind his ears. The typical bad boy Nina so much couldn't stand. As he and everyone else started to run, but for Nina, she was a little distracted when they were talking about her. She started to run behind the boys when they had a little head start. It was not hard for her to keep up with them when in just seconds she had already past the first boy before her. He looked at her in disbelief and thought that he would have never seen her coming back from behind him. It was not that he was running that slow, he looked like a normal guy that did some sports. Not overweight and lazy, Nina was just too fast in other words. He screamed out the words "What the hell" when all the boys before him turned around. They didn't even see him when all they could see was Nina, and him, his was already far behind her. He slowed down when he saw Nina and gave up. Still do not believe that Nina just passed the last guy on the running track when Nina should have been far behind him. They started running faster when Nina already come for them and fast. Before they could even make an effort to start running faster, there she was. Running faster than them, passing them before they even knew, she was already gone. The small stones rolled over the ground whenever her feet left the red concrete. One by one Nina passed them and they all looked at her in the same way, they all thought the same thing. But there was still that boy with spikey hair who had to see the back of her shirt and even Léon was still running at the front, trying to beat the guy with all the gel in his hair. He was fast, both of them, but no match for Nina. Only three remained, first the boy with spiky hair, Nina believed he was called Quintin. Oh well, whatever, he would eat her dust soon anyway. And soon he did, it was almost that you could see the dust appearing behind her. It was so hard to not laugh at this moment when Nina passed him, smiling from ear to ear. He screamed out to Léon when he looked back at him and surprisingly saw Nina instead. To Nina's surprise, he smiled back at her. Like he knew that this was going to happen, that Nina was going to be the first one that would reach the finish line. It was not because Nina was first in the girl's group that she would also beat the boys. Only Nina knew that, she knew what she was and what she could do, but he didn't so he shouldn't even expect something like that to happen. Or was he hoping he could run against her? It's not that Nina was an athlete who knew what she was doing. Even though he tried to at least last a little bit against her just like everyone else, he lost. And soon can only smile at her back. Probably hoping that Nina would win against the other guy. What was his name again, Nina believed that the girls were calling him Luc. Well, Luc, you'd be seeing her ass because that will be the last thing that he will see from her. I guess Nina kept her promise to Léon who also didn't like Luc and liked to see him lose to a girl so badly. As you wish, just this once because Nina literally couldn't help herself. As the wind blew through her hair, the small stones from Luc appeared right before her feet. He turned his head when Nina winked at him and left him far behind. Running faster but still not the fastest that she had ever run in her life. She didn't even know what her limit was and would she ever be running that fast? Not here, at least. Nina wasn't even tired, not even a little. It was like a small earthquake when all the stones flew around, her feet touching the white line of the finish. Nina looked at the girls who were almost standing with their mouths open at her early arrival and looked back at the boys who still had to run halfway the way. I guess that's how it's done, but Nina was a cheater and those humans never stood a chance against a wolf like her.
"That was exciting to watch, you're fast." Mr. Curie said applauding for her and walking towards her.
"I wasn't running that fast."
"Well, you just beat the school record, and not even by a little. There was once this student that had the record and no one could beat him for years and you did it so easily like it was nothing, a record that a boy made and a girl beat. Unbelievable."
"I did, that must have been some slow record." Nina grinned.
"You should join the running team; we can use someone like you."
"Sorry, but I don't think anyone would love to see me there."
"Of course they do, just think about it?" Nina would never join anything; it was better to keep her distance from everyone. In that way, no one would get hurt. Nina sat down on the sideline and took her water bottle out of her bag. Luc and Léon finally arrived at the finish line and Léon came running towards her. Can't he just leave it as it is? I now understand the feeling I've been having so far it is called annoyance; I just want to kill this guy. Luc walked past Nina while Manon a girl with brown crullers whispered in his ears, "She is just a freak, don't worry about her". Nina didn't even do anything weird yet and still, she was already a freak. Oh boy, they didn't even know half of the story. Someone wasn't good at accepting their defy and needed a girl to cheer him up. For a second, Nina forgot that Léon was there as well, he grabbed his bag from the ground standing in front of her. "You're fast," he said.
"Told you I was athletic." He started laughing when he looked back at Luc who was still frustrated that he lost. "Merci for making Luc seem small. I'm sorry about earlier, I didn't know you had amnesia."
"You didn't know," Nina answered and took a sip from her water bottle. Now leave me alone, please.
"How bad is it?" Nina looked up at him surprised. Why does he even want to know, who cared about that? Who cared about her, apparently not her parents? He is just going to laugh in her face Nina thought. Nina stared at him, hesitating to say one word. If she did something then she was a freak and now an even bigger one that has no idea who she was. But the way he looked at her with his eyes slowly looking down, it seemed that he was more concerned about her than wanting to use her amnesia against her. Nina sat the water bottle down on the ground and looked him straight in the eyes.
"I have no memory at all. The Sisters think that I'm from Denmark because I was speaking Danish when they found me. But there was no one missing me in Denmark, so I'm stuck here." Nina said letting out a breath.
"What's the last thing you can remember?" Léon asked.
"I woke up in a room, a house somewhere in France."
"Okay that's a start, we got to find that house." Léon jumped up on his two feet, excited to help out in any way he could. But that house was his house, so it was a dead end anyway. But Nina couldn't tell him that she knew exactly which house it was.
"France is a big country," she said.
"We can start here in Baume-les-Messieurs."
"And then what? I spoke Danish when they found me and not French so I shouldn't even look here."
"You never know what you could find." He smiled at her, his eyes sparkling in the sun, full of hope. But hope was something that Nina lost a long time ago.
"Just leave it," Nina shouted and ran away, on her way to the next class, and forgot about it, hoping Léon would also forget the conversation. But sadly for her, he didn't forget. While Nina was in her class, Léon was already talking to Eloise and Blanche about her amnesia while they were in the same class. As soon as he saw Blanche and Eloise, he went to them and whispered so no one else could hear him. "I heard that Nina has amnesia," he said.
"Where did you hear that?" Eloise asked.
"She told me this morning when she was angry and now, she told me that the last thing she can remember is waking up in a house, which is good news because then she can find her parents but then for some reason, she doesn't want to know her past."
"No, we found her in the woods." Eloise corrected him and looked at Blanche confused.
"There was never a house!" Blanche was positive.
"So, she laid to me?" He asked.
"Or she was lying to everyone for all of it. Imagine, the amnesia was a lie and she knows where she is from. She's just been playing a game with us and the sisters at the orphanage." Blanche grinned at the thought.
"That's not true, she was speaking a completely different language and didn't understand a word we were saying. There is no way that that was lying for a crying terrified little girl." Eloise yelled looking at both of them. How can they even think that it's just horrible to incipient something like that? The school bell went off and all the students ran towards the door to go home. Nina packed her bag and headed to the school gate to find Eloise, Blanche, and Léon waiting for her. Well, she did expect to only find the girls and not him as well, he wouldn't give up, would he?
"You lied to us," Blanche shouted at Nina.
"Lied about what?" Nina asked.
"Your memories," She answered and Nina immediately looked at Léon, who didn't see anything wrong with telling her friends who only wanted to help her. What's wrong was that they only knew that they found her in the woods and that was it, no house and no little boy. Otherwise, they would have showed up at Léon's house with Nina as a little girl. Then what would his mother have done, a strange weird girl claiming to know his whole family? Don't make me laugh. Then this first meeting yesterday would have been even better. You're the weird girl from ten years ago, who seems to be a stalker. Yes, that's her, weirdness followed Nina wherever she went.
"You told them, I said to let it go!" Nina yelled.
"We just want to help," he said.
"Maybe I don't want to remember, what if my past was bad? You all know how much of a freak I am; I don't want it to get even worse, it's bad enough right now."
"That's only because you keep having weird dreams," Eloise smiled back at her.
"You never said anything about a house, you could have been home years ago," Blanche said with a little anger in her voice.
"Don't you want to go home and see your family? I ask you every day for a reason," Eloise said softly. They both stared at her and Nina didn't even know what to do, what to say. So, she just stood there, saying nothing.
"No one wants to be in the orphanage, we're all there because we don't have a family, they died, they're in jail or they left us like trash. You have a choice, you could go back home, but instead, you choose to stay at the orphanage." Blanche yelled. She was angry, angry with Nina, and angry that she was one of the girls in the orphanage who didn't have a choice.
"It's not something from my past, it's an old memory that I have forgotten about. Everything before that is still gone." Nina looked at Léon, the little boy she recognized, but that was all he was and had nothing to do with her past. Nina was as far as she was the day, he found her. In other words, she was nowhere. The past was still a mystery, Nina was still a mystery just like everything else.
"You don't know that for sure," Eloise said softly.
"Yes, I do!"
"Nina," Léon whispered.
"Stop digging into someone else's past, it's my choice to decide when and where I remember things and not you guys!" Nina screamed and her eyes were starting to glow, her nails were growing longer in seconds, Nina looked down at her hands. She needed to get away from them before she lost control. Before they saw a whole new unexpected thing. That would be bad if anyone ever saw it. Nina ran as fast as she could to make it out of there, away from them before she did something terrible. Something that she couldn't take back and would regret for the rest of her life. She ran straight to the woods and lost all of her control; no animal or human was safe from her now. As Nina ran faster, her body
started to change. The long hairs were quickly multiplying over her body, her body grew bigger and stronger. The clothes ripped open and fell on the ground and they flew away with the speed she left behind. Big paw marks and nails stamping in the dirt, leaving cracks behind. Nina's fur lit up in the sun when she was running. Big and small diamonds lit up in an orange color from the sun. From small pieces to larger ones when you went to the tail with in-between scarp long hairs. One of the hairs fell on the ground when her transformation was complete. Nina kept running, reaching, reaching for something that could help her relieve her frustrations. Or once again shown herself how bad she exactly
was, reminding her what she was. Because that was the only thing she knew. The sun slowly went under while Nina had been running for hours. Nina sat at the edge of the river; the water splashed around from the waterfall. Blood was falling from her chin onto her legs and into the water. She sat there, staring at her reflection. The wind blew through her hair. Nina held her hand above the water and pointed her finger into the water as circles were forming around her reflection. All she could see was blood, red eyes, a monster of destruction. Nina slammed her fist into the water as the water, making the water jump around in the air. Nina stood up and went back. After a little, she found her clothes ripped on the ground and put them back on. It was not much but at least she was wearing something. Nina ran back to the orphanage before the Sisters would wonder where she was this whole time, it's been hours so there was no dough that they would think that. But they also got used to Nina disappearing and not coming out of her room so it didn't matter. Nina reached the orphanage and went to the side of the building where her room was. She climbed inside her room and took a little box from underneath her bed. She opened the box where a collar with a medallion was inside took the collar out of the box and flipped it over to read the four little letters on the back.
"Nina - even this thing is useless- I'm officially no one.