Why does Cheng Jinyang want to find Su Lili in his nightmares? There are three reasons:
Firstly, Xing Yuanzhi is not by his side, and Cheng Jinyang doesn't want to face the demons alone.
Secondly, seeing Su Lili every day helps dispel the annoying hallucinations. Or rather, Su Lili in the nightmare is part of those hallucinations. Once she appears, they usually don't recur for a short period, which is normal.
Thirdly, of course, it's because my dear Lili is so cute and being with her brings me great joy.
Now, Cheng Jinyang fully understands why the original owner was so deeply in love with this childhood sweetheart.
He even feels that the factor of her death later in his life, leading him down the path of suicide, might outweigh the loss of his parents.
It's not for any specific reason, it's just because my dear Lili is too adorable.
"Ah," Su Lili, lying in his arms, said.
Cheng Jinyang opened his mouth, and a peeled and deseeded grape was fed into it.
"Is it sweet?" Su Lili smiled, her eyes curved.
"Sweet!" Cheng Jinyang nodded vigorously, but in his heart, he thought Su Lili's smile is even sweeter, I feel like melting.
"Hehe, let me peel another one for you," Su Lili continued to peel grapes.
Cheng Jinyang really wanted to say, "You don't need to peel another one, how about we kiss instead?"
But when he thought of his fiancée Ah Zhi, he quickly regained his composure and dispelled all the romantic thoughts in his mind.
After all, as sweet and realistic as the illusion might be, it was just an illusion, and one cannot live in a nightmare forever.
"Ah, Xiaoli," he gazed at the beautiful and charming face of Su Lili, unable to help but say, "If only you were still alive."
Su Lili's slender hands trembled imperceptibly. Then she continued to slowly peel the grapes and said, "Yes."
Sure enough, so you admit it? No, it should be 'I' admit it. Cheng Jinyang felt a pang in his heart, feeling endless sadness welling up from the depths of his soul, as if it were going to engulf him completely from head to toe.
"The past Su Lili is already dead, Jinyang."
Su Lili turned over and straddled him, her hands embracing his neck, pressing her forehead against his, and whispered softly, "But... at least 'I' am here, able to be with you every day... for me, that's already enough happiness."
The sadness in Cheng Jinyang's heart receded once again. What else could he say?"
"Ah, yes," he silently embraced Su Lili, feeling the warmth and trembling of her delicate body in his arms.
"Let's not talk about sad things," Su Lili smiled, "come, have some grapes, open your mouth!"
"Ah~~~"
"Ah."
Chewing, chewing.
"Are they sweet?" Ah Zhi's voice came from the side.
"Sweet..." Cheng Jinyang suddenly realized, calmly saying, "Xiao Li, I'm going to the bathroom."
"Oh." Su Lili let go of him.
Cheng Jinyang brought Xing Yuanzhi to the bathroom, awkwardly asking, "Why are you here?"
"I came back home and saw you sleeping," Xing Yuanzhi calmly said, "so I came in to see what you were up to... Oh, she was even peeling grapes for you?"
"I was extracting intelligence," Cheng Jinyang defended himself.
"She hid the intelligence in the grapes and fed them to you. If you don't eat, you won't get it, right?" Xing Yuanzhi pretended to be curious, blinking her eyes, but there was no hint of laughter in them.
Cheng Jinyang: ...
"I was actually counting on you to wake me up after you came back. What should we do now?" he sighed helplessly, "wait a few hours until we naturally wake up?"
"You don't divert the topic from me!" Xing Yuanzhi suddenly became furious, reaching out to pinch his arm.
"Who was it that said not to be overly attached to illusions? And now within less than a week, you're all feeding each other? Huh?!"
"Ah Zhi, maintain your image! Pay attention to your image!" Cheng Jinyang hurriedly restrained her, pointing to the mirror as a reminder.
Xing Yuanzhi turned her head to look, seeing her own reflection burning with anger. There was hardly a trace of the former cool and aloof appearance of Xing family's Qingfeng.
Oh no! The character setting is collapsing!
So she restrained her expression again, returning to the fairy-like cool posture, and indifferently said: "Remember, falsehood may be more beautiful than reality, but it can never become reality!"
"Understood," Cheng Jinyang said seriously.
"Mm." Xing Yuanzhi nodded, "Also, call me Ah Zhi again and you will commit suicide, don't force me to take action."
The two left the bathroom, and Cheng Jinyang nodded to Su Lili with warmth, saying: "Xiao Li, I'm going out for a while, I'll come see you next time."
"Okay~" Su Lili obediently replied.
After the two left, Su Lili remained stunned, silently staring at the floor of the living room.
Half an hour later, she suddenly jumped off the sofa, went to the bathroom, carefully checked every corner, and even sniffed the air.
There was no scent of anyone else.
"So, my Jingyang..." Su Li stared at the mirror in the bathroom, revealing a sweet smile of confusion, murmuring, "Ah Zhi, who is she?"
......
Back to reality. After several rounds of battles against demons, Cheng Jingyang finally woke up from his nap on the sofa, only to see Xing Yuanzhi looking exhausted, propping herself up from the nearby sofa and searching for slippers on the floor.
"I'm going to the bathroom." She put on her slippers and stood up, saying weakly.
In the bathroom, she locked the door, filled the bathtub with water, and then comfortably soaked herself after taking off her clothes.
This was her way of decompression. In a sense, she was grateful for her bathing hobby, otherwise she probably couldn't endure the daily ordeal of nightmares.
"Um... want to talk?" Cheng Jingyang knocked on the door from outside.
He knocked on the door because he heard the sound of water inside and knew that Ah Zhi was particularly easy to talk to when she was bathing, so he deliberately chose this time.
"Go ahead." Xing Yuanzhi responded warmly.
"I think..." Cheng Jingyang carefully chose his words, "Being clean is fine, but if encountering blood makes it impossible to move, with a decreased reaction speed, and even a blank mind, isn't this beyond the scope of cleanliness? Shouldn't it be considered hemophobia?"
Inside the bathroom, Xing Yuanzhi submerged her head under the water, quietly pondering.
"You're right," she surfaced again and said, "The aversion to blood and flesh is restraining my combat abilities. But, sorry, Jingyang, I'm afraid I still can't overcome this weakness for the time being."
"Have you seen a psychologist?" Cheng Jingyang asked.
"I have," Xing Yuanzhi slowly wiped her arms, "My father took me to see many doctors before, even the Wu family from the Wu county specifically for adjusting perception. But..."
"Is it a structural lesion?" Cheng Jingyang asked.
"Well, sort of," Xing Yuanzhi sighed, "It's said to be a mutation in some glial cells within the cerebral cortex, affecting the regulation of some nerves and hormones. It's not something that can be cured simply by manipulating perception or blocking the cerebral cortex."
Even brain domain development can't shield it? It seems Ah Zhi is even more unfortunate than me...
With these thoughts, Cheng Jingyang sighed and asked with concern, "Then, why don't you rest tonight, and I'll sleep in the living room? Having nightmares twice a day isn't good, right?"
Xing Yuanzhi was slightly startled, then couldn't help but laugh.
"It's okay, Jingyang," she said softly, "Avoidance... ultimately can't solve the problem."