"Open your eyes, Wilhelmina Rosalind Miralanthor!"
Clenching my teeth hard, I fisted my hands, and slowly, fighting everything inside of me, and the disgusting feeling that began to feel me up, the burning of nausea in my throat, I began to open my eyes, but I stared at my feet instead, staring at my fox slippers.
"Good. Now, up!" The reflex said.
"I…" I gulped.
"Come on. Or I'll bend down and make you look!"
Slowly, I let my eyes run over the girl in the mirror and I flinched as I saw her, my heartbeat quickening. Her naked toned curvy bow legs showering a cloak of scars and tattoos, the black pair of shorts hugging her hips and up to a small waist, a long half-buttoned fancy male shirt adorning her upper body under a solid emerald and obsidian corset that were holding up wide and round breasts, the cleavage showing slightly.
The long sleeves of the shirt rolled up until her elbows, showing more scars all over her arms and tattoos. Her small hands with rings and also tattoos and some scars. Also showing sharp and marked collarbones.
Up in her clear thin neck was a serpent necklace adorning the cream skin, going up to her face. She has sharp and marked jawline, thin chin, full pouty round red lips, a snub small nose, high cheekbones, big serpentine midnight blue eyes, long curvy eyelashes, dark straight eyebrows, two black small dots at the left top of her forehead, a deep dimple in the center of each cheek, small ears, and a long curly glittery silver hair.
"Disgusting," I cursed as my eyes fell to my body again. "This is a nauseating sight. Makes me want to puke. I'm horrifyingly ugly."
But as I said that, the eyes of the girl in the mirror turned sad, and it was as if her heart broke to hear me saying this. "You are beautiful."
"Don't lie to me!" I hissed. "I… I'm disgusting."
"You look identical to your mother. Was she disgusting?"
I gasped, the nausea stronger. "No… I… I don't."
"Yes, you do." Suddenly the girl's hair turned ebony black and I gasped, coming closer. "Do you see it now? You look like her."
"No. She's beautiful. She's the most beautiful. I'm disgusting," I denied strongly. "Mom is graceful, and I…" I looked down at my scars. "I am anything but that. I'm broken. Like a tea cup that felt, shattered to pieces, and it's owner tried to glue it back together. I'm all stitched up."
"No, Wilhelmina, you're gorgeous. Your eyes may be literally open, but why do you keep them close? Why do you refuse to see? Why do you blind yourself?" Then second she… I… said that, I froze.
"I'm not blind. My eyes are open!"
"It saddens me to see you like this, child. You don't believe you are worthy of it, do you? Of the love. Of the care and protection of others. Of having a good appearance after all you went through."
She… "You don't know what you're saying!"
The me of the mirror reached to touch her palm on her side of it, "I'm sorry for what you've been through, child. You should have been able to live your childhood and grow in a healthy environment, not go through this. Not suffer like no one should. A suffering worthy of the Circle's of Hell, and not of how a grandmother should treat her son's child."
Her word took the breath out of me. "How do you know so much? Who are you? How did you know my mom? Or what I went through?"
"My name is Belladonna Sabine van Amstel. I am the spirit of the Emerald Mirror of the Soul. I see the lives of all those who come to stand in front of me. Crone got me from Umbra Rune Miralanthor before the war broke out, and when she built Belladonna Academy, she did so, in my name. I'm essentially the spirit of the Academy, if you may!"
What the hell? "Emerald Mirror of the Soul? Mia… the Crone built the Academy? You were with my grandfather before?"
"I was the mirror of the Queen and King of Emerald Sky City. One of the Royal jewels, which Umbra handed to the Crone, for her to keep until his descendant came to be again, and went to claim their place as the King or Queen of the Winged Serpents Kingdom. Then, bring me back to my home," this… mirror is… mine?
"I don't understand. Why not let you there?"
"Umbra and Cara didn't want me to be alone. I am not simple a mirror, I am a spirit, and it would get lonely. Thus, they trusted the oldest Deity to keep me until… you came. I've been waiting for you, kid. You are the Queen of the Winged Serpents of the new world, a direct child of the children of Umbra Rune and Wilhelmina Cara Miralanthor. But it breaks me to see you full of cracks on your soul," that doesn't sound good.
"Can't you not look like me? It's bothering me," I sucked a breath.
"That cannot happen because I am a spirit without a soul. Wound on the physical world, on the physical body, doesn't mean anything. But a crack on the soul? That can only happen when one has gone through the worse kinds of suffering imaginable."
Scoff, "There people worse than me," like Oli.
"No. There's not. You've suffered more, I guarantee you!"
"No. I have not."
"You have as much soul cracks as the one you're thinking of!"
I blinked, "How can you tell?"
"Because I've seen your mate, kid. His cracks are different."
She knows Oli? "Has he been here before?"
"Him. Your mother. Your father. Your mate's patents. Cosmos. Naël and Abellona. Agost, Nicolette, and many others. I know what I am talking about. Your soul cracks are in the same amount as your mate's, but different, and your physical suffering was worse than anyone. Ever."
Has that many people come here? "You're biased to me."
"No on this case. I cannot lie, child. No mirror can lie. It goes from the person on the outside, to allow themselves to open their eyes and see the truth that lies inside me. But you're blind, and refuses to see it!"
"Can you stop calling me that?"
"Then don't blind yourself. Now, come closer, Hel!"
Gulping, I took a step closer and raised my hand.
"No need to do that. I'll allow you passage. I'll allow you passage, my dear. But first, I want to try helping you with your soul sight. Can you allow me to give this present?" What?
"Will it help with my blindness?" Maybe it'll help me find the aether user, who I cannot identify according to what Mia told me, because I'm 'blind', even though I have no idea what that means.
"I hope so, but you need to accept it. It'll bring out what's hidden in you quicker than intended. And will help you see yourself!"
"I don't want to see myself," I mumbled.
"Well, well, seems like we have a problem. But if you insist on refusing to look at yourself, Wilhelmina, dear, you will never be able to open your midnight blue eyes, and see what's right in front of you. If you refuse to see yourself, to accept and love yourself, it's not you that will be doomed, dear Hel, it's everyone else."
This doesn't make sense. "I just don't like mirrors."
"We both know that's not all. You hate yourself, your powers, what you did to survive. You blame yourself for Shayanne's death, for having undergone physical and psychological torture. You believe you shouldn't be loved, because you believe you harm everyone. You love your mate, but you hate that he's mated to you, because you believe he deserves better, even though you are the best there is."
"No!"