Chapter 2: Feelings
Isabel's perspective
Part 1
A young woman had fallen asleep in a lonely carriage. She gave off a faint smell of chlorine. Her sleep was interrupted by an announcement over the loudspeaker.
—We are arriving at the swimming center, don't forget your belongings.
—Just in time.
The train stopped and, before opening the doors, began to move again, and then announced its next destination.
—Next stop: Adolfo's heart.
—What the hell is this?!!! —she shouted.
The speakers turned on again.
—This is no joke, this is the place you want to go.
She got up, confused. —The place I want to go? You're not wrong; I couldn't, we're just friends.
—But you are madly in love, so much so that you melt for him.
—What are you saying?!! I'm not in love with Adolfo! I know I'm not—she looked down, her hands resting on her chest. —Besides, we are very different, you know... He has a very different kind of freedom compared to mine.
—Are you sure that what you feel for him is not love?
Isabel raised her head —Yes, maybe what I really feel is admiration.
—And if he changed clubs, what would you do? Would you still think the same?
—…
Silence took over the entire train; Isabel simply did not know how to answer. It was a question she wasn't expecting.
—I'll ask it another way: would you give up swimming for him?
Isabel tried to say something, but she stopped and began to doubt what she was about to say.
—You keep saying that you're not in love with him, so what are these feelings? How did swimming become something you would give up just to be with him?
—That's not true...
Her words gave off an aura of doubt. I would never have thought about giving up swimming, but then why did I suddenly see it as something possible?
—Okay then, and if Adolfo became a famous pianist, he wouldn't have much time and would be absent frequently. So why not be the sweet wife waiting for her tired husband? I know you've thought about it, Isabel.
—…
Isabel didn't know how to respond to that. Deep down, she agreed, but she also knew that this was something Adolfo would never allow.
—Maybe your destiny is not with him; just give up, accept that you love him, and face this impossible love.
—I... I really love Adolfo...
—Wake up from this dream! And face this cruel love.
—Dream…?
Part 2
That person I like is not someone special; his appearance is average. At first glance, he appears to be someone without interest, a person without ambitions or dreams, but that is quite the opposite; you can't take your eyes off him at any time because, as long as he has the piano, he won't stop moving forward.
When he talks about his aspirations, he can look so cool.
He wants to become a pianist even though his parents are against it and do not support him enough. As a person, it would be normal to reproach his parents, but instead, he goes out of his way to let them know that, for him, piano is not just a hobby.
I fell in love with him in a somewhat peculiar way. It wasn't because of love at first sight, much less because he had done some heroic act towards me. Although the latter is not so far away, with the only difference that it was the complete opposite of that; I did something for him or something like that.
It all took place one day while I was teaching him to swim:
—Come on, you can do it, you're doing well, keep up the good work, you're almost there.
—Please, we have to take a break.
—But what are you saying? We just had one a few minutes ago. Well, try one more lap and we'll take a break.
As I watched him take another lap, I thought, "He's progressed faster than I expected; he's worked hard."
—Very good, Adolfo, you've done well, you can rest now.
—Hooray, finally!
He came out of the pool and stood next to me. Despite being tired, you could see a big smile on his face.
"I should congratulate you," I said quietly.
—You know, you've gotten better at this.
—Yes, and I owe everything to you. I never thought I could enjoy something as much as the piano.
—Come on, what are you saying? You flatter me.
In the excitement of the moment, I patted him on the back; I didn't measure my strength and, accidentally, he was thrown into the pool. Seeing that he didn't come up, I began to worry; he was still having trouble with some things, and just when I was going to rescue him, it was as if he no longer knew how to swim and I was paralyzed for a few moments.
—What's happening? Why can't I move? My feet are shaking!
I beat my legs in despair.
—Move! They're my feet, aren't they?!
Suddenly the world stopped, faded into darkness, and my thoughts became clearer.
—Why didn't I teach him what to do in situations like this? Why did I have to push him? This is all my fault.
Desperation took over me.
—What do I do? —I fell to the ground with my face full of tears—. It's over... I'm useless.
Something like this had never happened to me; this was all new. I felt guilty, I was so scared, I was afraid.
Look, my hands were shaking and my teeth were chattering. It seemed like I would never get up and as if something took over me, I got up and, still trembling, I jumped in. I didn't know what I was doing, I was just moving on instinct, and I managed to rescue him.
—Please, you have to be okay, you have to get up, wake up.
I no longer knew what to do; suddenly, all I felt was fear, fear of losing him. This feeling made me want to be alone with him; I didn't want to get away from him anymore. I didn't know it at the time, but those feelings would only get bigger.
When he woke up, I quickly threw myself on top of him. The fear I felt was combined with a constant feeling of calm.
—Adolfo, Adolfo... Don't abandon me.
All I wanted to do was hold him and never let go; that feeling of satisfaction knowing that he was okay, that hugging him and being able to feel him gave me, made me wish it would never end.
—Come on, can you let go of me now? I already feel better.
—Just for today... let me stay like this for a moment longer.
It's quite nice to be able to feel your heart beating. I never could have imagined that a hug could be surprisingly good and satisfying. Whatever you call this feeling, maybe that's what they call love.
Guilt, fear, happiness, satisfaction, and even love; I had never experienced so many feelings at once.
—It's okay, I don't think it will hurt anyone.
After the incident at the pool, Adolfo and I had established a somewhat strange bond. That afternoon, after the unusual incident, we stayed in the pool for a while longer after the lesson, sitting on one side, watching the last rays of the sun illuminate the surface of the water.
Part 3
The day after that incident everything became embarrassing. Isabel couldn't sleep for a minute; she had no idea how to behave in front of Adolfo.
—Hey Adolfo, how are you doing? No, not like that, how should I talk to him? —Isabel put her hands to her face, trying to hide her embarrassment as she remembered that incident.
Someone touched Isabel's shoulder.
—Isabel, what are you doing talking to yourself in the hallway?
—A… Adolfo, it's you. You arrived early ha ha.
Adolfo's expression turned. —Isabel, I want you to accompany me to a place after school. I'll wait for you at the entrance, okay? "I'll be waiting," he said as he hurriedly walked to the classroom.
—Of course…
As she walked to the classroom, all kinds of thoughts ran through her head.
"What do you want to tell me? Will it be a confession of love? No, no Isabel, calm down, don't rush."
The classes passed and the curiosity to know what Adolfo wanted to tell her grew. She was like a little girl who can't wait to open her Christmas present.
—Isabel, let's go home together.
—I'm sorry, Sofia, but I already have plans. Maybe tomorrow, okay?
Isabel looked around the classroom in search of Adolfo, and when she noticed that he was no longer there, she hurried to the agreed place.
—Oh, Isabel, it's you, I thought you wouldn't come.
—Sorry for the delay, I stayed talking with some friends. And where are we going?
—You'll see, you'll love it; it's a beautiful place, one of my favorites.
Despite the overwhelming silence, it was very warm and very comforting. Just being close to each other was enough, so much so that words were not necessary, and they both seemed to know it.
—It's here, the cafeteria, the clock.
—It's impressive and its desserts are very delicious. Oh, look, I didn't know it also had a piano.
—You're right, I hadn't seen it before; they should have brought
it yesterday.
Isabel looked around the cafeteria, noticing how the cozy atmosphere and tranquility of the place seemed to invite special moments. With a smile, she turned to Adolfo.
—You know? It would be wonderful to hear you play here, Mr. Pianist. What do you think?
Adolfo hesitated for a moment, but then smiled, feeling Isabel's support.
—It's okay, since you asked, I can try it. I'll play "Clair de Lune" by Claude Debussy.