Ξ  Author's note   Ξ   :            

Hi everyone My Name Is Brahim Cheikh,  and this is My first story and Absolutely the best  one out here !!! 

Enjoy



Everyone seems to think that we all have some kind of story to share,

some pain to spill out...

They say they'll listen, but let's be real here..

they're too busy making up their own stories to make us out to be the bad guys.

But you know what? Screw them.

Be whoever the hell you want to be, even if that means being alone.

I've found my happiness in my loneliness .

I'm one of those characters that nobody really talks about, but secretly wants to be talked about.

It's a weird paradox, I know.

I've always wanted to do a bunch of things, but above all, I just wanted to be loved.

I wanted to experience that kind of love you see in those Korean dramas,

where someone swoops in and saves your sorry ass, wipes away your tears, and pays for your happiness while erasing your sadness.

Life...

life can be a real cold-hearted bitch sometimes... I've never really felt connected to this world.

Sure, I went to school and university, tried my damn best, but I always ended up failing.

   Not because I was weak, mind you, but because the tests were just ridiculously hard.

Life itself is a tough nut to crack, and I just never seemed to be good at anything.

Well, except for singing along to some tunes while I whip up my favorite ramen and eagerly await the next episode of my all-time favorite

" drama".

You know what keeps me away from reality?   Kdramas,

They're like my escape hatch from the mundane,

When I'm watching those characters on screen, it's like they just get me, you know?

It's a place where I can revel in my loneliness , but still feel like I'm with someone.

Those dramas have been a lifeline for me, helping me survive those days that I just wanted to fly by.

Forgotten it was my own life that Im wasting , but yet, aren't our lives like that anyway?

I never had a huge circle of friends, but that's okay.

I've got my own sense of humor, my own little quirks that make me laugh, even if others don't quite get it.

I've got my own unique interests and passions that I enjoy more than anyone else.

And let me tell you, im cold ,just like those days,  yet little stuff sometimes can drive me crazy in the blink of an eye.

Like most people, I wasn't born with a silver spoon in my mouth.

My family gave me everything they had, and I'm grateful for that...

We had love, you know? A good relationship with our mother, but our father, well, he's a bit of a cold soldier ...

Giving the cold love, the Poor man never learned how to show affection, but hey, nobody taught him how to..

i can't judge

So, here's the thing: love is supposed to be this magical force that can fix anything, right?

Well, turns out, sometimes loving something too much can actually break it.

And let me tell you, that's exactly what happened to us.

I wake up, rub my eyes, and then close them again.

It's like a reflex at this point. I'm 18 now, finally done with high school.

those years of studying were no walk in the park.

I shed more tears than I care to admit. But hey, I survived.

I made it through the endless torment of bullying, the rollercoaster of making friends and falling in love,

only to be betrayed by all of them.

But you know what?

I'm still standing, same as you are.

Now that I've graduated,

the world is bombarding me with questions.

What do I want to be? What do I want to do? Where do i wanna go?,

And honestly, how the hell am I supposed to know? Nothing is as it seems, you know? Life didn't turn out the way they told us it would...

Maybe they lied to us, or maybe it's our own damn fault for being so naive.

We were just innocent ...kids,

after all.

we learned the hard way that life isn't all sunshine and rainbows,

We didn't know about the darkness, the struggles, the black color that lurks beneath the surface.

But now we do.

And armed with this newfound knowledge, we can navigate this crazy world with a little more wisdom. So, here's to us,

the survivors. Cheers.

But little did i know

Life has taken a wrong turn somewhere along the way. I mean, I'm 21 now and it's finally starting to sink in that things don't just magically fall into place because we wish for it.

We pray to God, hoping for a miracle but things wont be bright in our place,

Here I am, unemployed and a university dropout.

I'm as broke as ever.

And forget about the dramas, I can't even afford my beloved Ramen anymore.

It's a tough situation at home too, with my family constantly bickering about the lack of space and how crowded it is .

I wish I could do better, you know?

I wish I could escape to a place where nobody knows me, where nobody would bother asking me about my life because honestly, I've got nothing to say to those who do,

what if, against all odds, something amazing actually happens in my life?

I mean, wouldn't that be a game-changer?

And here's another thought: what if those pesky voices that always seem to show up at 3 am, trying to bring me down, actually decided to lend a helping hand instead?

I've been putting up with their nonsense for over 14 years now, giving them prime real estate in my head,

and suddenly I'm not worth it anymore? Seriously, what's up with that?

I wont forget  those nights and days when I was genuinely happy and proud of where I was in life, Or is it just me?

I'm on this mission to improve myself

- you know, be better, talk better, the whole shebang.

I used to be this chatty, funny girl, but now I feel like I'm playing the role of a clown,

desperately trying to hide my true self from my own family.

It's a tough gig, let me tell you.

Now, I'm 24 years old now, slaving away for a solid 9 hours a day at a call center.

Yeah, not exactly my dream job, but  it's the only thing that came my way after applying a whopping 99 times...

Can you believe it? On the 100th try, I finally struck gold. I shed a few tears, but then I was over the moon for landing this gig.

For a while, I was happier than ever. I felt liberated, ready to move out and start living life on my own terms.

You know, like those characters in those cheesy dramas. I had big plans - saving money, traveling, seeing the world.

But now, here I am, crying again...

This time, it's not just on the surface.

It's a deep, sharp pain that's eating away at me from the inside.

Depression is a real bitch,

And let's not forget the joy of interacting with people.

I have to put on this facade, pretending like I actually want to talk to them.

But deep down, I'm just going through the motions. Everyone seems to be out to get you, trying to pull a fast one, even your own boss.

It's like everything is going up - prices, pain,... you name it.

It's enough to make your head spin, like you're stuck in a perpetual cloud of confusion.

Life  huh? It's a rollercoaster of emotions, But hey, at least I've got my sense of humor to keep me going, even tho its kinda fading nowadays. ..

life can be a real pain sometimes.

It's like the universe has it out for me.

I mean, seriously, I can't even trust myself anymore...It's that bad.

So there I am, sitting in my dark room, binge-watching my favorite kdrama, trying to laugh off the misery.

it's not easy, Tears streaming down my face, I try to find solace in a cup of tea every morning.

But even that routine gets old real quick.

Then, September 29th rolls around.

I thought it would be just another monotonous day,

but boy was I wrong...