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There were drops of blood running down the glass's sharp shards, and following them upward one would find Rom's throat.
He had lost his arm and his throat was ripped apart which caused a large amount of foamy blood to pour out of his mouth, after which the light left his gray eyes as he collapsed to the ground.
His twitching body had already lost its vitality, and there was no doubt that it no longer held life.
Elsa elegantly bowed to his fallen body as if to pay her respects.
She placed the glass she'd used to kill him down by his still twitching body,
"I'm returning this. I no longer have a need for it, you see."
She said cruelly as she twirled the kukri knife in her hand.
Cleaning the blood off the blade, she once again pointed it toward the other two.
Subaru who was still on the ground could not even say anything.
He was entirely focused on the brutal slaughter that had just occurred before him.
Someone he had been conversing with just a few minutes ago was now dead. And it wasn't due to an accident or illness, it was due to another person's malice.
"―Ah, so you're the braver one."
Subaru, who was still frozen, raised his head when he heard her voice filled with admiration.
His limbs would not obey him. As he lay there in that stupefied state, he saw Felt stand up before him, striking her trembling knees as if to encourage herself.
She straightened her legs and combed hair blood-soaked hair back.
"How dare you…"
Subaru couldn't see her expression since he was behind her.
However, it was clear that her strained voice filled with hatred was not a tearful one.
"If you resist unnecessarily, you might end up getting hurt."
"You're going to kill me either way, you damned sadist!"
"I might not cut you properly if you move. I'm not very good with blades, you see."
She skilfully turned the knife in her hand, and acted out a rehearsal of her cutting ability.
Felt was facing her with no weapons whatsoever, her chances of victory seemed non-existent.
He should raise his voice, his brain decided.
He should attract Elsa's attention and buy Felt time to escape.
He at least had to give her time to call someone, or even just escape on her own.
Analyzing the difference in their ability with his minimal experience, this was the conclusion he had drawn.
Despite this, his throat produced no sound, as if it was frozen.
His will to fight did not reach his limbs, they merely continued to tremble with fear..
"… Sorry for getting you caught up in this."
"… I, I'm"
She whispered a small apology to Subaru.
These words caused his face to jolt up toward her, and he completely forgot about his plan to shout and instead all that left his mouth were words that seemed to be begging for forgiveness.
And then, Felt left his sentiments behind forever as she dashed forward.
There was a loud sound as her body flew forward, seeming light as a feather.
The instant after she moved, it was as if a gale was blowing through the loot house.
It looked to Subaru like she had completely disappeared when she started running.
Having disappeared from his field of view, she then reappeared right next to Elsa, whose eyes were wide at this extreme speed as Felt's slender leg sunk into her side.
Having landed her attack, Felt stepped back as if leaping, and once again drew in wind as she moved at top speed.
In that limited space she was even treating the walls as solid ground, her movements were simply amazing and even Elsa couldn't help but be surprised.
"The divine protection of wind. Ah, how wonderful. It seems you're loved by the world,―I'm envious."
Elsa's ecstatic smile suddenly changed, her eyes filled with loathing as her arm whizzed through the air.
That was all it took,
"―Ah"
―For Felt to be cut right through from her shoulder while still in the air, she then helplessly fell and tumbled across the ground.
The wound extended from her left shoulder to the right of her chest, its depth was such that even her organs were cut right through her bones.
Her body had fallen facing upward and blood spurted out of her like a fountain in accordance with her pulse, it seemed like the pain and the shock of being sliced into had already caused her to lose consciousness. Her movements had completely stopped.
The blood pouring out of her lost its vigor within a few seconds, silently signaling that her life was at an end.
His body wouldn't move.
He wanted to go to Felt's side and stop her bleeding.
If one said it was already far too late for that, he at least wanted to close her eyes.
But his body refused to do even this, it had basically become a doll that could only circulate blood and pain.
"The old man and the girl have both fallen, and yet you still haven't moved. Maybe you've given up?"
Her voice was somewhat pitying, and she seemed bored as she looked at Subaru who was still stock still.
It would all be over if she just got a little closer and swung that knife. It was probably because she realized this that she was so casual, it even looked like she might have been stifling a yawn.
Her attitude caused an unbearable rage to surge within Subaru.
They were people he'd only just met, it had barely even been an hour.
But even so, he had conversed with them and they had opened up to each other. She had killed them like it was nothing and showed no remorse whatsoever, to Subaru this was unforgivable.
And most of all, he couldn't forgive himself for letting them die by this wretched woman's hand while he watched.
This belated rage was what finally caused his limbs to move.
He pressed his trembling limbs against the ground and somehow managed to get up in a rather animalistic fashion. Was his body shaking due to rage or fear? Maybe it was both?
"Ah, you've finally stood up. You're late, and rather dull, but not bad."
He faced Elsa who had her kukri knife at the ready and charged her with everything he had.
He would throw himself at her and beat her down with strength surpassing his limits.
But his charge,
"That's no good at all."
Was immediately stopped by Elsa's elbow which slammed right into his nose, seemingly crushing it.
She spun her body and struck him with her elbow with minimal movement, and as he recoiled she followed it up by drawing an arc right into his body with her long legs, easily sending him flying.
Subaru crashed into a shelf of ceramics and fell to the ground as the fragments scattered.
In that instantaneous exchange, his nose and front teeth had been ruined. And the side that took Elsa's kick was in extraordinary pain, he felt like he'd lost some ribs there.
Despite this, he slammed his fist into the ground and stood up immediately. The endorphins flowing throughout his body dulled the horrible pain which was at a level he'd never experienced before.
His breath wild in this excited state, he once more launched a suicidal attack without thinking ― And he was countered yet again.
His wild swings did not reach her, she smoothly shattered his shoulder with the back of her blade.
And then, as if his shrieks were an annoyance to her, she landed a kick directly into his jaw, forcefully shutting him up and causing his broken front teeth to fall out. She looked down at his collapsed body.
"Simply pathetic. You're evidently a novice and your moments are unrefined. You possess neither divine protection nor skill, and you weren't even able to think up any sort of strategy. Why even bother trying?"
"Shut up… I've got my stubbornness too… After you've gone and done all this."
Subaru couldn't even properly yell at her because of his broken nose.
He had lost his arm to that counter just now, everything below his left shoulder had gone limp. He couldn't feel the pain, but the ringing in his ears was horrible. His nausea had returned, and it seemed to pour out of his mouth with his rage as he staggered around, barely standing up.
He was riddled with wounds. His chances of victory were zero, and it was exceptionally unlikely that he'd even be able to land a hit.
The sight of him standing up even though the situation was utterly hopeless caused Elsa to sigh,
"I'll admit you've got outstanding spirit. If you'd drawn it out earlier, perhaps things could have ended differently for these two."
Elsa used her knife to indicate the two she had cut down.
His eyes followed the movement of the knife's tip to land on the corpses, and a sudden discomfort caused Subaru to frown.
For some reason, this scene felt familiar to him.
The loot house that had been turned into a sea of blood. A giant who had lost an arm and had his throat torn apart. And within that dim room, the dull gleam of a brownish blade―
A thought suddenly shot through the back of his mind―
"Let's end this. I'll be sending you to the angels."
Elsa licked her red lips and disappeared into the darkness with an alluring smile.
Subaru groaned as he lost sight of the threat, it seemed like she had simply vanished into the shadows.
"W-Where…?!"
Subaru restlessly looked around, his sensitivity to every little sound or sign greatly heightened.
His pathetic behavior truly seemed like that of a weakling waiting to be hunted by a predator. From Elsa's perspective this was probably terribly boring, it was like he was just laid out on a cutting board.
Consequently, when she appeared from the shadows her slash was exceedingly straightforward.
"Wha―?!"
Having judged that she'd target his stomach, Subaru barely managed to dodge.
He stepped back a bit, drawing in his abdomen as he did, due to which the horizontal swing merely grazed him. The slight cut caused a sharp pain to run through him which he bore by clenching his teeth.
"Rrrruuuaaahhh!!"
He then spun his whole body, landing a spinning kick right into Elsa's face.
A satisfying blow delivered by twisting his waist, the tremendous impact on his foot confirmed that he managed to land a hit, the feeling rushed through his heart. And then,
"Aah, I really felt that one."
The second kukri knife Elsa had drawn had just torn about 70% of the way through Subaru's torso, causing blood and guts to spill out,
"―Ah?"
One step, two steps, he staggered around until his shoulder hit the wall, causing him to collapse as if he'd slipped. Looking down, he could see copious amounts of blood pouring out of his abdomen, and unable to handle the pressure, his internal organs had also started falling out.
He tried to place them back in with his shaky arm, but the clotting blood prevented him from doing so.
"Are you surprised? I split your stomach when we passed by one another. This happens to be my specialty."
Elsa said as she smiled, forming small splashes in the sea of blood as she walked toward him.
Once she reached Subaru's side, who was by this point incapable of even speaking as he shrieked, she lovingly looked upon his entrails within his darkened blood,
"Aah, your bowels truly do have such a lovely color, just as I thought."
This woman was abnormal. She was insane.
Even the endorphins flowing through him couldn't hide the terrible pain that was causing his vision to dim, and before he knew it seemed like he had ended up on his side.
Like this, he slowly extended his arm, frailly grasping Elsa's foot.
"Au… Uah"
"Does it hurt? Are you suffering? Is it hard? Are you sad? Wanna die?"
With his hand still on her ankle, Elsa crouched down by him, her line of sight intersecting with his.
Her eyes looked like she was in a trance, it was as though she didn't feel anything at all when she took a life. No, she was definitely feeling something.
The ultimate pleasure.
"But it'd be a shame to make it too easy."
Still crouching next to him, she smiled sweetly as she swung her blade.
And that was the last thing Subaru saw.
Her slash was vivid, and it cut right across Subaru's face. The result,
"―GGaaaaaahhh?!"
Both of his eyes had been torn apart, he had forever lost his sight.
Still collapsed on the ground, Subaru used his hands to feel his deeply cut eyes.
There was a mixture of blood and tears, and he once again vomited blood as he screamed, and he was assailed by the feeling that his insides were completely empty, as if all of his blood and organs had spilled out.
It was strange that he was even alive. It was like he had entered hell.
And he couldn't even look at himself, he simply lay there on the verge of death not knowing when death would finally come.
"Slowly, slowly, slowly, slowly, slowly, writhe around."
As he approached the end, he felt Elsa's voice gently strike his eardrums, it seemed tormenting, savoring, grieving, cherishing, and loving.
His pain, suffering, rage and despair were all overwhelmed by a jet black fear.
In that world he couldn't see, in that world where he didn't know when the candle of his life would burn out, what dominated his now empty heart was a single-minded fear, the extreme fear of death.
―When will I die? When will I die? Am I still alive? Am I not dead? What defines life? Can it really be said that I'm alive, in this state lesser than any insect? Can it really be said that I'm alive, now that I'm being toyed with in the palm of life and death?
―What are life and death? Why am I afraid of dying? Do I need to be alive? No?
I'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscaredI'mscared
His instincts rejected the inevitable death that was ceaselessly approaching.
It ended up filling Subaru's mind, he was already at the end and now his blank field of view was dyed white,
―Ah, I'm dead.
With this, Natsuki Subaru's life reached its disappointing conclusion.
-x-X-x-
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"―Quit spacing out, man. You want the appa or not?"
When Subaru's consciousness returned, there was a red, ripe fruit before him.
As he gazed at this very apple-like fruit, worthless thoughts such as 'they call it the fruit of wisdom, huh' passed his mind.
A forbidden fruit that resulted in expulsion from paradise if you ate it.
Maybe if he bit into it, he'd be able to escape this incomprehensible situation.
"Hey, you listening?"
The middle aged man knit his brows and once again called to Subaru who had no reaction.
Some distant corner of Subaru's consciousness perceived this which caused his face to jolt upward. He started looking around at his surroundings.
He was standing in front of a stall on a street bathed in early afternoon sunlight.
Within this shop there was a wide variety of fruits and vegetables. This certainly wasn't an unfamiliar sight to him, but there was a small difference.
Filling the crowded street, there were hair colors that were impossible in his old world, as well as races that were quite literally impossible walking around as if it were natural.
Watching all this hustle and bustle, Subaru scratched his head.
His left arm could now move, when it touched his abdomen he felt nothing unusual, and there was no sign whatsoever that his organs had poured out or that his eyes had been slashed.
"I have no idea what's going on here…"
As he murmured this, his rising nausea and dizziness overwhelmed him, causing his knees to give out.
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"It's water. Can you drink?"
Accepting the cup offered to him, Subaru gingerly sipped at the water poured within it.
The water was ice cold and spread as if soaking into his parched mouth from the tip of his tongue, it even relieved his dreary mood to some extent.
"Aah, just what I needed. Thank you. ―You really are a good guy, old man."
"Quit it. It'd be no laughing matter if you suddenly collapsed in front of my store, it'd look like my products caused it. Rest in the shade until you've settled down."
The man replied without a hint of bashfulness and then went back into his stall.
Subaru was still sitting on the ground near the road as he watched the man leave, he then leaned against a shop's wall as he sighed deeply.
The one who had helped him when he was overcome by dizziness and was about to collapse was the shopkeeper he was now well familiar with.
Despite his rough appearance, he immediately prepared a wet towel and some drinking water once he guessed that Subaru was suffering from heatstroke, and then brought him into this shade so he could rest.
You really couldn't judge people by their looks. There were muscly bald old men who were like good natured grandpas, and sexy women who took pleasure in murder.
"I thought my stomach and eyes were destroyed…"
He whispered as he felt his eyelids, and once again confirmed that he could see properly.
Naturally there was no wound on his abdomen, and his left shoulder was in good health as well. It seemed his wounds had once again disappeared completely, and perhaps due to some obsession he was placed before the man's stall yet again.
"But even so… That was… Really bad."
He moved his hands from his eyelids and looked at them.
Even though his fingers weren't touching anything, they trembled slightly. This traveled up his arms until it finally became a terrible chill throughout his entire body.
Merely thinking back to it caused his teeth to chatter as he curled up with his head between his knees, the pressing horror so intense it even drowned out the hustle and bustle around him as his body trembled.
It was repulsive, alien, overwhelming, absurd, and the very personification of despair.
He had never been exposed to such malice, he had never experienced such pain and violence, and he had never had his body destroyed to such an extent.
He and his acquaintances had lost their lives, the terror was so heartrending that all he could do was curl up.
He refused to even think of facing such an aberrant entity.
"Stop thinking about it, stop thinking about it, this is absurd. It's hopeless, there's nothing I can do. That was death. That couldn't have been anything but death. That I'm even alive is unbelievable luck, isn't it?"
Seeking agreement from no one in particular, Subaru desperately begged for forgiveness.
The scenes of Rom's grisly slaughter and Felt's final moments after she was cut down repeated in the back of his mind.
And after that came the horrifying memory of being sliced up, broken, opened up, and having his sight stolen.
He felt nausea and dark emotions surge up and he immediately splashed his remaining water on his head.
There wasn't a lot, but it was enough to cover his head in the cool sensation.
He wiped away the water dripping from his bangs and then repeatedly slapped his face to restore his emotional state.
"Alright, let's cheer up. It's simple. Just forget all about that place. There's a mountain of other things I have to do and think about. For instance, I'll have to think about how I should live in this world. I happened to get caught up in some trouble while I worried, and then…"
―I was saved, and wanted to return that favor, and then felt like I was going to die.
"Come on, I said not to think about that."
Even if he tried not to think about that, the silver-haired girl continued to shine within his memories.
To begin with, most of what had happened to him in this world was in some way related to her, so it was impossible for him to forget about her and focus on the world.
However, if he thought back to his time with her, he would ultimately end up at that painful and despair-inducing memory.
His thoughts were once again in a downward spiral.
His shaking wouldn't stop, and his negative thoughts kept going in circles as he completely lost sight of any hope.
What should he do and how should he do it to succeed, would it be fine if he just stood around and did nothing, right now he couldn't grasp even the slightest hint.
"Hey, how do you feel now? Any better?"
With his face peeking out of his stall, he asked this considerate question.
Despite his attempts to act tough, the concern he displayed showed that he was a good man at heart. It wouldn't do to just rely on his kindness like this, Subaru thought as he decided to leave the area for now.
"Ah, I think I've calmed down somewhat. Sorry to trouble you."
He tried not to look weak as he stood up, and then returned the empty cup. The shopkeeper seemed to want to say something as he took it, but he didn't press the matter further.
"I'll definitely pay you back someday."
"That's unnecessary. But if you ever make some money, come to buy some appas."
Subaru's face was meek as the shopkeeper lightly tapped his shoulder, after which he raised his hand and returned to his store.
Feeling good about the man's laid-back attitude, Subaru took a deep breath and stepped toward the road. The crowd continued to move just the same as when he was curling up, and the main street lined with stalls seemed as bright as ever.
"… The loot house."
He should probably go there, he thought vaguely.
He thought about it, but his legs did not move in its direction. Going there meant facing that terror.
If things went wrong and he encountered Elsa again, his life that he had somehow kept would essentially be wasted.
Having been summoned to another world, he would simply rot away without accomplishing anything.
"Ha. It'd be just the same if I run."
He ridiculed himself as he smiled, and then put his hands in pockets and started walking.
In the opposite direction from the loot house. That was what he had decided.
He would throw it all away, give up completely, and turn a blind eye to the favor he had received.
After all, that was what he did before he came here. He never did anything he didn't have to, no need to rock the boat. Stuff like give and take or whatever, human interaction in general was a pain to him, that was the sort of life he lived.
At this point, that couldn't possibly―
"Eh…?"
When he raised his head and took his first step, an expression of bewilderment left his mouth.
Within his widened field of view, the crowd moving back and forth seemed to be avoiding him as he stood in the middle of the street.
There was a tall figure with reptilian skin, a beastman whose height only reached Subaru's waist, a young pink-haired dancer, a knight with six swords,
―And a girl in a white robe, her silver hair fluttering as she walked.
The girl glanced at him and then as if to avoid touching him, she shifted to the side and passed by.
Her bundled up hair swayed, and a flower-like scent permeated the air and tickled his nostrils. Her strong-willed amethyst eyes had already disregarded him, they had a sharpness that only looked forward, toward the path she was supposed to walk.
Her dignified atmosphere hadn't changed and that shimmering beauty hadn't the slightest blemish, the girl he had been looking for was walking right before him.
"Wa―"
He couldn't immediately call out, the sound stopped in his throat as he ran after her.
The girl smoothly weaved her way through the crowd. His mental state was lost, confused and disordered as he chased her silver hair, and he called out in an almost tearful voice.
"Hey, wait… Wait up… Please wait…"
She looked at him for a moment, her eyes cold as though she was looking at a stranger.
They'd only interacted a few hours, to her he was just a passing acquaintance. Maybe he was even someone she despised, considering he couldn't even heed the simplest warning and put her in danger.
Even if she thought of him that way, Subaru continued to pursue her.
He didn't know how she felt about him. So at the very least, he wanted her to tell him that much.
If he was going to be hurt by whatever he imagined she thought of him, he'd much rather end up hurt by her real opinion.
"Please wait,―Satella!"
Once he stopped her, what exactly did he want to say?
The instant the answer appeared within him, he shouted her name as if he just remembered it.
His shout tore through the noisy road and even reached the girl who was getting further and further away.
The silver-haired girl stopped immediately.
He pushed the crowd aside to reach her, and placed his hand on her slender shoulder.
"Please don't ignore me. It was my bad for disappearing, really. But I don't get what's going on either. I even went back to the loot house to look for you, but I couldn't find you…"
Satella seemed surprised as his hand lay on her shoulder.
When she turned around, all that left his mouth were excuses. He spoke rapidly, justifying himself as if afraid he'd be hurt.
Perhaps her gaze that seemed to see right through him was the cause.
However, even with this gaze on him, Subaru felt some relief in addition to his anxiety.
At a glance, there didn't appear to be any serious wounds on her. Maybe she had also been healed by someone after the loot house incident. It was also possible that she'd healed herself, but what was important was,
"Sorry, I've just been blabbing about myself… But I'm glad you're okay."
The fact that they were able to meet again made him happier than anything.
Come to think of it, what worried him next was her partner― Puck's safety. Subaru had far too many things he had to apologize to him for.
He couldn't uphold a promise made man to man. That was a sin he ought to be condemned for.
"You…"
Once Subaru stopped talking, Satella started speaking as if to fill in the gap.
It had only been a few hours, and yet it felt like he hadn't heard that silver bell-like voice in forever.
He could see her standing before him, he could even reach out and touch her, he had finally caught her, such out-of-place emotions welled up within Subaru. However,
"What are you thinking―?"
As Subaru felt this sense of relief, Satella directed an angry look at him.
Her white cheeks flushed slightly, and she twisted her body a bit to shake his hand off. She took a step backward to put some space between them, and her eyes were filled with hostility as she looked at him.
Her unexpectedly harsh reaction caused Subaru to gulp and fall silent.
But thinking about it, it was obvious this would happen. To her, it must have been a wonder that he even dared to show his face.
He would accept any abuse she wished to rain upon him. This resolve of his―
"I don't know who you are, but to address someone by the name of the Witch of Envy, just what are you thinking?!"
Was smashed to pieces by this completely unexpected reaction.
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Faced with these unexpected words, Subaru felt as if time itself had stopped.
The sound from the crowd had vanished. All that he heard were his heart's pounding, and the silver-haired girl's angry voice.
It was as if all other sounds were gone― No, they were gone.
"What…?"
He muttered as he awkwardly turned his head to look around and realized.
Every single person around them on this street filled with stalls and pedestrians was now focused on the two of them.
They were all shaken and had fallen silent, as though even the slightest movement was forbidden.
It was as if the conversation between the two of them had completely dominated the street.
"I'm asking you what you're thinking. Speak up."
However, Satella wouldn't allow any hesitation despite his bewilderment.
Her tone was harsh, but Subaru had no response since he didn't even know why she was angry.
They seemed to be on completely different wavelengths as to what the problem was.
"I'll ask this once more. ―Why did you refer to me by the name of the Witch of Envy?"
"No, I mean, I was told…"
"I don't know who told you that, but that's in very poor taste. You're at fault too for going along with it. ―The Witch of Envy, the symbol of all things taboo, merely mentioning her name is frowned upon, to think you'd actually call someone by that name."
Her anger clearly on display, Satella―The silver-haired girl plunged him into a sea of confusion.
The crowd gathered around them all nodded at her words. Which is to say they were proof that her words were correct, and this confused him even further.
He didn't understand what she was saying.
He had just said her name.
And yet she took offense to this, and the people around them acknowledged that she was correct to do so.
He didn't know what he was doing wrong, he was just being reprimanded for being wrong. He couldn't reflect on his actions or change his behavior.
"―If that's all, I'll be on my way. I don't have time for this."
She said as Subaru hung his head, she then walked off gallantly, her silver hair fluttering. Subaru wanted to call out to her, but the name froze in his throat.
He'd be making the same mistake twice if he called her that again. But then, what should he call her?
This hesitation dulled Subaru's judgement.
Consequently, he simply watched what took place before him without doing anything.
"―!"
There was a small gasp atop the canopy of a nearby stall about a head taller than Subaru.
It leapt, its small body was gently pulled downward by gravity, and the instant it landed it rode the wind to accelerate.
That swift wind was wearing somewhat dirty clothes and had golden hair flowing behind it. She easily slipped through the crowd as if divinely inspired, and her quickly extended arm entered a white robe with a hawk embroidered on it.
It was only a moment of contact, but that was enough for the wind.
The wind made the robe flutter, and then took off as the girl turned.
"Don't tell me―!"
The silver-haired girl raised her voice in surprise and stuck her hand into her robe.
She didn't find what she was looking for, and her eyes widened as she looked toward the wind that was fading into the distance.
That wind held an insignia symbolizing a dragon in its hand, and watching it from behind Subaru instinctively yelled,
"Felt?!"
This caused the wind to waver as if perplexed. But its speed did not decline and it disappeared from the street into an alley in an instant.
That was some incredibly fast work. A chance meeting of an instant. He had only seen it momentarily, but that was most likely―
"It's gone. Was this why you stopped me…? You're in on it?!"
The girl groaned at Subaru who had just stood still, unable to react to the hectic situation.
She immediately pointed her palm his way, but as if rethinking this decision, she ran off toward the alley the wind had disappeared into.
"Hey, wait! It's a misunderstanding! I'm not…"
Subaru ran into the alley as well, chasing after them so he could resolve this misunderstanding.
As he ran, his mind was filled with doubts toward many mysteries.
There was far too much information being unloaded onto him, and his flustered brain could not process it all. Even if this weren't the case, he felt like he had died twice today and that really messed with him.
"Someone please be nice to me! Why the hell was I even summoned here?!"
The absurdity of the situation made him yell this as he stumbled through the dim alley.
He wasn't sure his stamina would last, but he didn't think he'd lose to those two over a short distance. He'd catch up to them right away, and clear up all these doubts.
That was what he was expecting as he ran, but,
"Damn… A wall?!"
Subaru spat as a dead end blocked his path.
The two he was chasing weren't there. If he recalled correctly, Felt was agile enough to easily scale walls. And Satella probably wouldn't have any trouble getting over a wall or two with her magic.
"I don't mind climbing, but… I don't think I could catch up that way."
Most importantly, if the gap between them widened Subaru couldn't just keep running.
Even though he had trained his physical strength inside his room, it would be impossible to do the same with aerobic exercise. His lack of stamina was his fatal flaw, and even here it caused him to give up the chase.
"If this is no good, how about the loot house? Satella and Felt are both alive, so… Rom must be too."
He decided that it would be ideal to go on ahead of them and link up with Rom as soon as possible.
For now he should get out of this dead end and head toward the slums. Thus, he turned around,
"… You're kidding."
Before him were some figures blocking his way out of the alley.
There were three of them, they were somewhat filthy, and they had a rough aura about them as if their violent nature had manifested on their faces.
By this point it was a pain to even bother describing the three standing in his way.
These bandits who made the back alleys their hunting grounds had encountered him for the third time that day.
-x-X-x-
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"Just give up already! There's a limit to incorrigibility!"
Subaru was tired of seeing these guys and kicked the ground in frustration.
This was their third encounter, and it was once again a three on one in an alley. Despite how fruitless their first and second attempts were, they still continued to hound him, he was truly surprised by this tenacity.
If the situation wasn't as it was, he might have even applauded them.
"I don't have time for you guys. I'll face you when things settle down, so get out of my way."
He was a little uneasy, but he had managed to beat them solo last time so he kept his composure.
If he intimidated them a bit, there would probably be an opening. That's what he expected, but,
"Get out of his way, huh? What do you say we do?"
"I don't like his attitude, not one bit. It doesn't look like he understands who's going to be giving the orders here."
"You pathetically lost three on one, why the hell are you trying to act tough…? Even the sorest loser would show more shame."
To be honest, Subaru couldn't help but feel like a sore loser himself right now.
In other words, this place had turned into a gathering of beaten down losers.
"That's way too negative! I thought I was a more optimistic character!"
"It's no good, he's completely messed up in the head. We decided to target him because of his weird getup, but maybe this is…"
The men started talking to one another, clearly annoyed by his loud monologue. The empty-handed one and the one with the nata seemed to be losing interest in Subaru, but the biggest threat, the one with the knife, still had a sharp gaze.
Those eyes seemed to have given up on his value as a wallet, but there was another dark desire cruelly wavering within them.
The man's look caused Subaru to internally mutter, "This could be dangerous".
Having faced them twice, Subaru concluded that the man with the knife was the most troublesome among them. In addition to his lethality, he was also the one with the quickest temper.
Forget fighting, it would be wise to avoid even getting close.
"Got it. I won't resist. Just state your demands."
Subaru said this as he raised his hands, emphasizing that he had no intention of fighting them.
He had completely dropped the confident attitude he had, and instead changed to one of compliance.
The reason being that he decided to prioritize getting out of here, and wanted to keep the man with the knife calm. He had decided that some losses couldn't be helped, and it would be best to just get out of here for now.
―Well, there was also the unfortunate possibility that they were aiming for revenge and would beat him to a pulp.
If things looked to be moving in that direction, he'd run away with all he had before they had the chance to stab him. If he managed to make it to the main street, they probably wouldn't be able to do anything conspicuous.
As Subaru vigilantly formed plans to ensure his safety within his mind, the men's attitudes toward him relaxed.
They spoke as if to ridicule his cowardliness for being willing to take their demands,
"C'mon, if you were that scared you should have just done that from the start."
"You bastard. You sure talk big for a scaredy cat."
"Isn't this great? You heard him say he wouldn't do anything, right? What a coward."
Their words annoyed him, but Subaru forced a smile and laughed them off. He found some satisfaction in naming them 'Ton, Chin, and Kan' in his mind.
[TN: Tonchinkan = Foolish, irrelevant]
"Well, just want demands do you intend to make of this idiot?"
"For now, set down everything you've got. Even those weird clothes and shoes. You can keep your underwear, we're not devils after all!"
They mercilessly mocked Subaru who had humbled himself before them.
So they have the concept of devils here too, huh, along with such irrelevant thoughts their words also instilled a strong sense of unease.
Everything he had, even his clothes and shoes, this demand was surely―
"You guys, you really have gone and hit your heads somewhere, haven't you?"
This was the exact same as what they had asked the first time he encountered them.
Perhaps they'd hit their heads, or maybe the poor bastards lacked the brainpower to even remember what they had said before, it could even be that they overused the same template so much they didn't even remember who they said it to.
They were irredeemable to the core, but their attitude toward Subaru who had once beaten them down was strange, considering this, there was one more possibility
"There was Felt too, looks like there's a lot of memory problems around here…"
"Quit flapping your gums. Don't wanna follow your orders? Or do you not have the brains to follow them?"
"You're the last guys who ought to be talking about brains…"
This last mutter stopped in his mouth, and Subaru showed that he was willing to do as they said.
As he wondered if he should at least try to keep his clothes, or maybe deal with them all in one go now that they'd gotten closer, he stuck his hand in his bag―
"Huh―?"
He frowned, this was his most unsettling experience yet in this world.
"Why…?"
He muttered as if groaning, as he slowly confirmed the contents of his plastic bag.
In it was his shoyu tonkotsu cup ramen, his wallet and phone that were too troublesome to keep in his pocket, and finally, a golden snack of a flavor he was extremely fond of.
Right, the gold-colored snack― The corn potage flavored snack.
It was the first thing he had eaten since he came to this world, and it also proved very useful to calm Rom's rage at the loot house, after which most of it was supposed to be used up.
―But right now, it was completely full and back in his bag.
"I thought we'd eaten this… There was definitely only a little bit left."
They had consumed at least two thirds of its contents.
And yet it had returned to its original state. There was no sign the bag had even been opened. It was strange no matter how he thought about it.
The disappearance of his wounds could be explained. He had seen Satella's magic. Therefore he could conclude that someone had healed them in the aftermath of both tragedies.
―But even if he supposed that such a high class healer existed, would it really be possible to restore something that no longer existed?
"Right, duplication magic…"
He remembered Rom mentioning something of the sort.
Duplication magic― Magic that made it possible to not only copy something's appearance, but fully replicate it. If someone used that magic, even this…
"But then what about the bag's opening. Don't tell me healing magic can even restore glue or something…"
He didn't think that was very realistic.
And considering this world seemed to have sacrificed technological development for magical development, it seemed doubtful that they would have the knowledge to reglue the bag.
His thoughts were completely blocked on all sides. But within those trapped thoughts, Subaru started to believe that this was not healing magic. But that was where it stopped, because the other possibility he had thought of was too absurd, his sense of reason rejected it, believing it to be impossible.
"Hey, what the hell are you doing?"
"Ah?"
A sudden call from right next to him caused him to let out a dumbfounded noise.
One of the men―The barehanded third one, whom he called 'Kan' in his mind. Subaru frowned when he realized that the man had walked right up to him.
"Why are you approaching me like that? Let me tell you, I don't need your help to get my clothes off."
"As if anyone's going to help you do that! You were the one who staggered over here!"
Only after he was yelled at did Subaru realize that he had gone from the inside of the alley all the way to the side of the road.
It seemed he had been moving unconsciously while engrossed in thought. But to the men, his thoughtless actions ended up looking like hostile conduct.
"If he won't do as we say, what say we knock him around a little?"
"Or rather, this is a real pain in the ass already. Let's just end it here."
Subaru saw that the men were about to do something hasty, so he halted his deep thought for the moment.
What he needed right now was―
"Here, catch this!!"
"Wha?!"
He raised the plastic bag in his hand, and then tossed it deep into the alley.
It drew an arc as it flew into the darkness at high speed. Naturally, the men who were planning to loot it also followed it with their eyes.
Seeing an opening, Subaru energetically dashed past them.
Just as he'd concluded several times now, the most important thing was getting away from them safely. After that, he would have to go to the loot house and find the answers to the doubts that had welled up within him.
He himself felt that what he was thinking was foolish.
Some user of healing magic, who was incredibly proficient in both restoration magic and duplication magic, happened to come across the tragic scene at the loot house and out of the kindness of their heart, they healed everyone there completely free of charge, and then left Subaru alone at that one stall, after which they simply left without even introducing themselves.
Even this completely whimsical story was easier to accept.
"Well, that's pretty hard to accept too, though."
It was what made the most sense.
At least, compared to the baseless foolishness that had crossed the back of his mind.
With two contrary ideas conflicting within him, Subaru dashed out of the filthy alley.
If he made it out to the main street and ran around while making a lot of noise, even these guys most likely wouldn't pursue him. It was unfortunate to lose the contents of the bag, but he had snuck some things out right beforehand, so the only things left in it were the bag of snacks and some small change that was just dead weight― His losses weren't significant.
It was with this in mind that he ran, but suddenly his next step missed its mark by a wide margin, causing him to panic.
His body was unsteady and the leg he was supposed to have put out in front was stumbling. The strength then left his legs and he fell to his knees.
He put out his hands to stop his fall, and scolded himself for being such an idiot as to fall at a time like this. However,
"Huh, that's weird…"
He tried to gather his strength to stand back up, but his arms were trembling. He was completely unable to raise his body. He had also dropped the things he was holding before this.
"That's why we told you to just listen, fool."
He heard a scornful voice from right behind him, and somehow turned his head toward it.
The man standing behind him was the second one, whom he had nicknamed 'Chin', an extremely humiliating name.
With that vulgar attitude, the man pointed at Subaru as the edges of his mouth curved up.
Following his pointing finger, Subaru realized why he had collapsed.
―There was a knife embedded in his lower back.
"Goah… Gga…"
The moment he realized this, a terribly sharp pain ran through him and blocked his throat.
This extremely pure and primal pain even robbed him of the ability to writhe in agony.
―I've been stabbed! Stabbedstabbedstabbedstabbedstabbedstabbedstabbed.
Unlike the other two, the knife-wielding Chin hadn't been distracted by the bag. Meaning at that moment, he must have been more focused on hurting Subaru than stealing anything of value.
As expected, Chin was the most important one to deal with, more than Ton or Kan.
This was the result of neglecting to do so. In these few hours, he had already encountered many different types of horrible pain. But no matter how many times he experienced this, it would be absolutely impossible to get used to it.
"Hey, you seriously stabbed him?"
"I had no choice. What if he escaped into the street? It'd be a real pain for us."
"Aaah, this is bad. You hit his guts so he'll probably die… It's even drenching his clothes."
Is that all you think about when you stab someone, a complaint through the horrendous pain.
He couldn't afford to think of anything else, he was in so much pain that it was hard to even stay conscious. And judging by what Ton said, his wound was such that he wouldn't be getting back up.
He at least had to do something while he was still conscious.
Deciding this, he scraped together all the strength he had left, steadily gathering it as he prepared to shout.
Bringing it to his tongue, he tried to scream,
"Aalright, here's a second one before you go and try anything!"
A second knife was mercilessly thrust right into middle of his back.
"―Ough"
The numbness that spread through him like an electric shock canceled out his shout.
He was already far beyond the point where he could bear the pain or attempt to do anything like scream. There was no longer anything he could do.
The damage to his back seemed to have reached his lungs.
Even as he repeated his hoarse, rough breaths, his lungs would not expand and breathing became more and more painful.
Oxygen deprivation was affecting him severely, he was becoming so weak it seemed he would soon lose the ability to even think.
He lost sensation in his limbs, and no longer knew whether he was facing down or upward.
Even though his eyes weren't slashed this time, he still couldn't see anything as his vision had gone black.
―What do you mean, 'this time'?
It was pitiful to cling to an idea he had already dismissed as absurd.
If he was going to cling to it, he might as well do so to the fullest.
―Don't think about your impending death. Before you die, analyze the world around you.
His eyes were dead. So were his limbs. All he had left were his nose and ears. That being the case, he would have to make full use of them. Any sort of lingering scent would be fine, he didn't mind hearing all sorts of abuse. The stink of the dirt in the alley. The rising metallic scent of blood. His nose just died. It was gone. His ears were at death's door as well, and were barely even functioning.
"―St take… Valuables…"
"―It! The guards… Co…!"
"…Un! This is bad! …If we get…!!"
He could only pick up these fragments of conversation. Picking them up was fine, but too much of his brain had died for him to understand what he had heard. Since it was dead he could only hear. He didn't know if he would remember what he heard. What exactly did he mean, remember? What did he want to do by remembering? What was want? What was what―
As if following the parts that died first, his other functions steadily disappeared, and at the very end, with the scraping sound of something being pulled from him, Natsuki Subaru lost his life for the third time.
※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※
When his consciousness returned, Subaru was in darkness.
Realizing it was a darkness of his own creation, he gently opened his eyes― And had them burned by the dazzling sunshine, causing him to groan as he used his hand to cover his eyes.
"So, how about the appa?"
A familiar voice asked a familiar question right before his eyes.
His ears were fine. The hustle and bustle of the street was as loud as usual, completely different from the dreadful silence he had experienced in that alley.
Despite the fact that if he considered the distance, he was only one turn away.
"I couldn't even make it past this street, pretty pathetic…"
The scarred stall owner overhead his words of self derision, however he started to frown, seeming displeased that he wasn't getting a response.
Subaru knew from personal experience that though he looked intimidating, he was in truth a very kind man. Naturally, the shopkeeper probably had no memory of this.
As he thought such things, Subaru once again faced him,
"Say, how many times have you seen me?"
"How many times, you're a fresh face, man. I wouldn't forget such a conspicuous look."
"What's today's date?"
"It's the fourteenth day of the month of Tammuz."
"Thank you.― I see, the month of Tammuz, huh."
He had no idea what that was.
To begin with, he didn't even know how they recorded this world's calendar.―But it seemed they used days and months, and he could probably assume that they used a solar calendar.
It was likely common knowledge, but he hesitated to ask about it. Especially to someone like the owner of this stall, who was completely focused on selling his goods.
The shop owner was being very patient with him, but as expected he seemed to be thinking that he was wasting far too much time just to sell a single fruit.
Holding out that apple or whatever in his palm, he asked for the umpteenth time,
"So, the appa?"
He tried his best to hide his anger with a smile.
His white scar was twitching, and his forced smile looked more like an expression that would scare kids away.
In response, Subaru placed his hands on his hips and puffed his chest out,
"Sorry, but I'm totally, absolutely broke!"
"Get the hell out of here―!"
This angry shout caused him to recoil instinctively, after which he scurried away.
I can't go back there for a while, he thought, two meanings in mind.
-x-X-x-
※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※
"There's my wallet. And my phone. The corn potage and ramen and stuff are good too. No damage to my jersey or sneakers either. And naturally…"
Pulling up his jersey, he turned his head with great effort to check the state of his back.
There was no scarring on his middle or lower back, nor were there two knives sticking out of him.
"Phew, thank goodness. A wound to the back is a warrior's greatest shame. As someone who once enrolled in the kendo club, even if I were to stray from the path of humanity, I would never stray from the path of the warrior."
He felt around his unharmed back as he grumbled. He spotted a long hair growing near his shoulder and after a great deal of struggle, finally managed to pull it out after which he exhaled.
"So basically, that's what this is. It's hard to believe, though…"
He blew the hair away with his breath and placed his now empty hand on his jaw as he surveyed the street.
He was still on the same street, by stall only a short distance away from the grocer.
The shady looking owner who had lined up various suspicious looking jars and plates looked at Subaru as though he were a nuisance, but this had no effect on Subaru who leaned against the wall with his arms crossed.
The sun was high and the breeze was gentle. The street was crowded and a lizard drawn carriage would occasionally pass by. Even Subaru was starting to get used to the dust they kicked up by this point, and his only reaction was to gently fan it away from his face.
All traces of injury had vanished from his body, and his already eaten corn potage snack was providing excellent value, since it could be eaten any number of times. And his jaw was completely smooth to the touch,
"Pretty pathetic for me of all people to forget about my special skill."
He had the ability to estimate the passage of time fairly accurately based on the growth of his stubble.
Subaru had a level of self-confidence that bordered on admiration in his technique that made full use of a privilege only available to those with a consistent level of male hormones. He was certain,
―That his facial hair was no longer than it was after he shaved it before heading to the convenience store.
"So it's like that."
He pointed the hand that was touching his jaw forward, and with the gazes of many people including the shopkeeper on him, he snapped his fingers,
"―Looks like I return to my original state when I die."
And came to the conclusion he had previously dismissed as absurd.
※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※ ※
"Return by death, huh… It's like the ability itself is telling me to bite the dust."
[T/N: This is a JoJo reference. Subaru mentions the similarity to Bite The Dust, an ability that appears in JoJo.]
The original was more like a "Win and then repeat" type of ability, so considering Subaru's pattern of losing and returning, he felt that his current situation fit the name better from a literary perspective.
[T/N: The Japanese version of Bite The Dust literally translates to "Lose And Die"]
"To put it more directly… Isn't this something like time travel?"
It was limited, but this could be considered what one would call time travel. In short, Subaru had become a time traveler, something he could only dream of before.
To be honest, the possibility had been bouncing around his head until some ten-odd minutes ago, but he shied away from it due to the harsh activation condition.
He also felt that it was more likely that there was some wandering super healer who happened to encounter them.
And most of all, the main reason he thought it unlikely,
"Generally speaking, temporal magic is considered to be the highest class of magic so it'd be strange for me to have it right from the start. To begin with, even though one may dream of going back in time, it'd be impossible to actually do it. Or so common sense would suggest."
Having said this, he cocked his head wondering what about a parallel world summoning adhered to any sort of common sense.
Thinking of it this way, his earlier feelings of obstinate rejection would also fade away.
"Moreover, if I actually am returning by death, all the strange stuff until now suddenly makes sense…"
His first death, to put it briefly, was when he went to the loot house with Satella.
He had his defenseless stomach torn open and unable to even shout out a warning, he ended up getting Satella wrapped up in this, an absolutely inexcusable development.
His second death was after Felt and Rom were murdered, Elsa had slaughtered him, his resistance completely futile. When he first returned by death, he assumed the discrepancy in time meant it was a different day, but in truth he had returned to the same point on the same day.
His third death had happened recently, he had experienced it some ten-odd minutes ago.
It truly was a pointless death, but he couldn't think of a more fitting one.
For him to actually end up getting killed by random small fry at the very start, it was like every single choice had a BAD END attached to it, and it kind of felt like a poorly designed adventure game.
"Wait, I've died three times in just half a day…?"
Considering human life was generally considered to be something you only got one of, dying three times in the span of half a day truly was nonsensical in every way.
Subaru had certainly lived a mediocre life these past seventeen years, but if one considered that he had avoided death 17 x 365 x 3 times thus far, it was rather moving.
"Or I'm just really bad at staying alive."
He was too used to the comfort of his old world, due to which he could not keep up with the rapid-fire instant death events this one kept throwing at him.
The fact that he kept getting lured into obviously dangerous situations was probably another reason.
"Thinking back to the causes of the first and second time… It was probably Elsa both times."
The first time, the one lurking around in the darkness of the loot house was probably Elsa.
The corpse of a giant old man, that had to be Rom. But it was hard to imagine that Rom would end up dying regardless of Subaru's verbal gaffe.
"Could Felt have been in there… I couldn't confirm that much, huh."
Naturally, Rom was most likely accompanying Felt for her negotiation.
That being the case, she was definitely linked to his death. If things were like the second time, it was very likely that Felt's greed caused negotiations to break down.
"She pointlessly provoked her and ended up getting killed for it, maybe."
Considering her extremely competitive spirit, it was certainly possible.
And right as Elsa had silenced them, Subaru and Satella arrived with terrible timing. This was probably how the first time went.
"The second time was quite a bit simpler, wasn't it. I just happened to be one of the people being silenced."
Thinking of it this way, perhaps Satella ended up arriving there after they got murdered.
He knew about her magical ability, but he doubted that that homicidal maniac would give her time to chant. Satella was probably at a disadvantage 8 or 9 times out of 10.
"Wait, I've been killed by the same person twice. Simply put, Elsa's basically a certain death encounter, final answer. Also…"
Is there even a need to take countermeasures, Subaru heard his now calm mind ask.
Right, why did he have to think about what would happen if he encountered Elsa?
Frankly speaking, the loot house was the only place he ran the risk of encountering her.
And the reason he wanted to go to the loot house was in order to obtain Satella's insignia, and the reason he wanted to do that was to repay her for saving him.
But since Return By Death had brought him back to right after he'd been summoned, this debt had quite literally disappeared with time.
Satella's cold reaction to him on his third time was proof of this.
She did not know him. Meaning he had no relation whatsoever to the Satella of that timeline, and his debt no longer existed.
Meaning he could forget all about this insignia business, and instead focus on avoiding those BAD END flags.
He didn't know why he was granted such an ability, but it was a very valuable skill that would allow him to learn of future developments. He would avoid any dangers he could avoid, that was the right thing to do.
He had obtained something that appeared to be time travel. It would be meaningless if he didn't use it this way.
"Fortunately, I now know that my cell phone is worth quite a bit. Even without relying on Rom, if I can find some shop I can trust and sell it off, I'll be able to create a war chest."
More than twenty holy gold coins, he didn't know how much that was, but he figured it would buy him decent lodgings for quite a while. And then he would sharpen his fangs there until the day he was ready to bite.
"Well, I still have no plan as to what exactly I'll be biting into."
He wasn't exceptionally knowledgeable on any particular subject, nor did he have anything he was passionate about. To maintain a broad, but shallow knowledge of many things, such was the stance of the modern generation, and Subaru was no different.
"Once I sell this cell phone, guess I'll have no choice but to get hired as an assistant at some shop or something while I've still got money…"
He was extremely uneasy about how he would earn a living since he had no job experience, but doing some black labor should at least be better than getting involved in bloodshed. At least he most likely wouldn't end up dying thrice in half a day.
[T/N: Black company is a Japanese term referring to companies with poor working conditions. Black labor here refers to exploitative conditions.]
"It's simple then. The sun will set if I don't get moving right away. Right, old man?"
"I thought you were muttering something for a while, but what's this all of a sudden. Even if you ask me, it's not like I'd know.."
The stall owner next to him responded with an annoyed expression as Subaru looked for agreement.
He had a turban on his head and was running a stall that sold jars and plates. Regardless of Subaru murmuring nearby, it didn't appear to be one that attracted customers.
"Wonder if I should sell my stuff like this… But I wonder if I'd actually make anything if I tried selling things like you, with those crappy jars and stuff. What do you think, old man?"
"Don't say that crap while looking at someone else's merchandise! What's with you?!"
"I'm a man who'll one day be famed for his wealth. You could even call me the cell phone nouveau… Say, doesn't that wrapping on your head itch? Why do you have it on? You balding or something?"
"I don't understand most of what you're saying, on top of which you're being extremely rude! Go away, I've got a business to run here!"
His attitude was cold as he spoke in a strangely feminine manner.
Guess people treat passing strangers the same in any world, huh, Subaru thought as he sighed on the inside.
"But then, there's also some people so kind they help others even when it puts them in a tough spot."
She had something precious stolen from her, and was in the middle of chasing the culprit.
She stopped to save some useless guy she didn't even know, wasted her time healing him, and then tried to leave without receiving anything in return.
And then this kind girl let the useless fellow accompany her for his own self-satisfaction, and ended up dying a horrible death for it.
"Thinking back to the third time, there's a whole lot I learned. Or rather, it'd be pathetic if I didn't learn, but I'm not that stupid."
"What are you saying now?"
"There's probably a pattern here. You could even call it fate. ―No matter how many times it repeats, this will keep happening. For instance…"
Felt stole Satella's insignia all three times.
Rom had been killed in the loot house both the first and second time. Felt had probably died the first time too.
If so, what happened to Satella who most likely arrived at the loot house the second time as well?
She didn't have a burden holding her back, would she have been able to win against Elsa?
"I don't know. And I probably won't know. But there's things I do know."
If he just left things alone this fourth time, Felt and Rom would definitely be killed. And Satella would end up battling Elsa.
So what if those two died? One was a small-time villain who dealt in stolen goods, and the other was a brat who shamelessly tried to pawn off said stolen items at exorbitant prices.
They were both criminals, it would probably be a good thing if they died.
"Aah, I really am a child of the modern era. Even though I absolutely ridiculed these sorts of emotions from behind a computer."
Mercy and compassion were just stupid, that was supposedly what he believed.
At least, he wasn't just pretending as if he did. He thought of himself as a cold hearted person, and that all modern people were like that.
So no matter what situation he ended up in, he wouldn't be particularly moved and wouldn't react very strongly, or so he convinced himself. The death of a few people he knew was no exception to this.
"But still, I don't want that. It feels horrible. Those two aren't good people, far from it. ― But when I know that familiar faces are about to die, I can't just stand by and let it happen"
But in the end, it seemed that was all just an act. A result of his experiences in the virtual world. When the weight of reality set in, his tenets easily crumbled away, that was how flimsy they were.
He wasn't really that firm on these principles to begin with, though, so it was no loss to be rid of them.
"And of course, there's Satella… Or rather, that girl. Can't abandon her either."
Calling that name, Subaru thought to himself that it was most likely an alias.
Thinking back to the first time, she was pretty reluctant to say that name. And then there was their exchange in the third world. It was painfully clear.
To sum up, it seemed she didn't trust him enough. He hadn't built up enough affection and failed the name acquisition event as a result.
"Alright then, I'll do my best to actually learn her name this time."
Subaru started warming up on the spot, and stretched his body to the limit.
"Cha―nCha―Chachachacha!", As Subaru started his radio calisthenics routine, the shopkeeper was already beyond the point where he had anything to say.
Subaru performed routine two in front of the speechless man, and having worked up a good sweat, he turned around and suddenly raised his hands,
"There are times when a man's gotta do what a man's gotta do. ―Isn't that right, old man?"
"Right, right, right, absolutely right, so get out of here."
He'd planned to end it with a posed look, but the terrible reaction caused his face to twitch.
The shopkeeper drove him away with a perfunctory gesture, and Subaru ran off from the stall where he had spent such a long time deep in thought.
Pushing his way through the crowd for a while, he had probably run about 200 meters.
"Well then…"
Subaru stopped and brushed his bangs upward.
He looked here and there in a pointlessly exaggerated manner, and then smoothly placed his hand against a wall to lean on it, after which he closed his eyes and once again smoothed his hair. Then,
"Where should I go to find you, Not-Satella?"
He started his quest with words that didn't bode well for his future prospects.