As they ride, the passage of time feels like a lifetime. Even with a hotel nearby, the night seems long. Tiwa blinks and stares at his surroundings, trying to process everything. Nothing seems to register in his mind. He's not just talking about the surroundings but also about the situation. For the first time in many years, they are finally on the same page. It feels strange and unfamiliar.
"Here we are," Pravat says, leaning over Tiwa's leg to open the door of the car for him.
Tiwa turns his head to look at Pravat for a moment. It is hard for him to make eye contact, so he holds onto the sides of his seat for support and makes sure that he's sitting upright. He swallows hard and begs with his eyes, not to strangle his life, not to disturb his mind, and not to destroy his dreams. Isn't it enough?
"Thank you." It is hard, but he manages to form an actual sentence. Without pausing for a second, he suppresses his five senses and forces himself to step outside. The same is heard on the other side. The quest of his vision averts and stops with Pravat. What further is left to express? Nothing remains unsaid.
"Nothing is permanent. What happens now won't happen tomorrow. Let's be ready to wet in heat like a volcano." Pravat grins and brings a couple of fingers to his lips before pressing a kiss on them and throwing them at Tiwa. It serves to puzzle the omega more as Pravat winks and gets inside the hotel.
"What is that? Why does he write our fate according to the beat of my heart?" Tiwa murmurs as his head tilts up. No one is witnessing it yet. "The sky feels unreal, and the land feels unreal. Only he and I are real." He turns his gaze at Pravat's retreating back when a dull ache throbs in time with the rain in his heart.
Coldness seeps in, and Tiwa feels unbelievably heavy. His mind is plagued with relentless thoughts that he can't seem to shake. He attempts to rationalize with himself, crafting lies about Pravat's affections. But deep down, he knows it's futile. Those adorable dark brown eyes will mystify and haunt him forever. There is nothing more.
Besides himself, and unsure what else to do, he wraps his arms around himself and thinks introspectively. He knows he will be in deep trouble if he is found in the morning like this, but he doesn't care. He can think of an excuse. Because better than anyone, he knows that there is always another way. He can lie to anyone to save himself from terrible situations, but to his brother, he can't. What can he do?
Lost in thought, he enters the hotel and walks down the hallway until he collides with someone. With wide eyes and a frightened face, he looks at them like a startled bird. "B-Brother!" He exclaims before embracing him tightly, seeking comfort in the alpha's arms.
Jaran pulls away, a mixed expression of anger and relief reflecting on his face. "What do you have on your mind? Why did you get out of the car without informing Kay and Kiat? Do you know how worried I have been?" He growls his frustrations out. "You're acting weird, Tiwa. It's not good for you and your career."
Tiwa keeps his head lowered and eyes fixed on the floor, as if it's the best defense against the heated glare. "Sorry, I didn't mean to," he mutters before pausing, gasping slightly as if realizing something. He then reaches into his pocket and pulls out a bottle of suppressor pills. "I'd gone into heat."
Jaran's eyes land on the suppressor pills before he dares to look up. "Sorry, Tiwa. I just-" His words halt as Tiwa covers his mouth with a hand and shakes his head. Spilling the truth out doesn't mean hurting him. It's to avoid any misunderstandings in the future.
Feeling guilty, Jaran pulls Tiwa into his arms and holds him tightly. "Sorry," he repeats a few times before reaching over to gently stroke Tiwa's hair and pressing a kiss on it.
They reluctantly let go of one another when they hear a loud noise on the stairs. Pravat might have thought he went unnoticed, but Tiwa saw him hurrying up the stairs. The lunatic, who didn't like seeing them together, had interrupted their moment.
Tiwa smiles bitterly, shaking his head as he contemplates his fate. No matter what he thinks or feels, things will never change. He is stuck in this cycle of despair, and there is no way out. He wishes he could break free from the chains of his circumstances, but deep down, he knows that it is impossible.
Jaran sighs and wraps his arm around Tiwa's shoulders, leading him to their room. "When Kiat said you were missing, I lost my mind and rushed to search for you, but you returned right on time. I thank God for bringing you back to me safe and sound." He presses a kiss on Tiwa's temple and unlocks the door.
Once they get inside, Jaran shuts the door behind them and drags Tiwa to the bed. "You seem tired. Take a rest." He helps Tiwa lie down and covers him with a blanket. "How did you get here?" He asks, gently stroking Tiwa's hair to provide comfort.
Tiwa becomes tense immediately because he purposefully kept quiet about what happened earlier, but now Jaran is curious to know. He is unsure of what to do. If he lies, his brother will eventually find out the truth from either Pravat or himself in a few days. So, telling the truth seems the best option to avoid further trouble.
After making a decision, he lowers his eyes to avoid eye contact. "Pravat dropped me," he says, his voice quiet, feeling Jaran's intense gaze bearing down on him. "He saved me from some strangers who were after me, so I had no choice but to seek his help," Tiwa admits. He can't decipher the emotions etched on Jaran's face at this moment.
Jaran shakes his head, his eyes not quite meeting Tiwa before he leans over and kisses his little brother's forehead. He pulls back and says, "Go to sleep." There is a very non-Jaran shake in his voice, so Tiwa wonders if there is an answer to whether this is just Jaran Buathong being Jaran Buathong.
Jaran kisses Tiwa's forehead again before Tiwa can get out another word. "I'm fine."
Understanding that it's not the right time to push Jaran further, Tiwa decides to comply and put a hand on him. "Don't worry about anything, brother. Do you?" he murmurs, wanting at least one solid answer.
"Just go to sleep," Jaran replies, gently brushing a strand of hair from Tiwa's face.
Tiwa closes his eyes, trying to calm his racing mind by taking deep and even breaths. The bed creaks, and the weight shifts before completely going off. He listens as the door opens and closes after almost a full minute. There's more pacing for a couple of minutes before he hears the unmistakable sound of someone punching a wall. He struggles to hold his breath in response.
The bed dips and the weight shifts once more, enveloping the room in silence. Soon after, the sound of slippers being kicked off and the rustle of the blanket can be heard. Tiwa feels Jaran's fingers thread through his hair, skating over the throbbing knot on the back of his head, just light enough not to hurt, and then he's being embraced into warmth.
Tiwa sighs in relief and covers up his surprise by pretending to wake up, mumbling a quiet, "Mmm?"
Jaran tries to comfort Tiwa by saying, "Nothing. I didn't mean to wake you up."
Tiwa nods gently, even though he can guess what might happen. "I think I heard something."
"My leg hit the bed. Don't worry about it." Jaran whispers. His arm tightens around Tiwa's waist, giving him as much warmth as possible.
"Okay." Tiwa is right on the verge of falling asleep for real. "I love you, brother," he murmurs, the words slipping out in a drowsy haze.
"Shh," Jaran lets out a bitter, half-laugh, half-sigh, then presses his lips against Tiwa's temple. "Back to sleep."