Draco Malfoy was lying in a bunk bed in severe pain and cursing Harry Potter when the miracle occurred, he realised that it wasn't Potter's fault as a smile crossed his face when he remembered the reason he was suffering.
Stepping off the express had led to a whirlwind of new adventures as he was taken shopping for everything he would need. Draco then spent the night in a hotel where he made the most important discovery of his life; he watched his first music video on TV.
The pureblood Draco Malfoy was hooked on scantily clad females 'booty shakin' to rhythms he'd never heard before, as hobbies go this seemed pretty harmless compared to being an apprentice death eater.
At the camp Chuck and Bob had decided that they needed to take the 'pasty Brit' under their wing and show him how they do things in the good old US of A. Draco didn't understand half of what they were talking about but since their knowledge of Britain consisted of it being an island on the other side of the Atlantic his ignorance was usually just put down to him being English.
Draco's hormones were in overdrive as every female in the camp wore shorts and something called a 'belly top', which confused the hell out the pureblood as it's sole purpose seemed to consist of exposing female midriffs so you could see the jewellery pierced into the girls bellybutton.
Chuck and Bob then decided they would broaden his horizons which directly led to his condition, sneaking out last night to meet three girls Draco made some startling discoveries, his cologne drew every mosquito in a two mile radius, he couldn't hold his beer worth shit, hangovers must surely be worse than the cruciatis curse and snogging a muggle girl was way better than kissing Pansy Parkinson.
When his hangover had worn off sufficiently to allow his higher brain functions to once again perform their duties these revelations would change the pureblood for ever, after all something that good simply couldn't be wrong.
America was the land of opportunities and since he would be spending at least the next four years here Draco intended to seize as many as possible, his pureblood father had ruined the Malfoy name in Britain by perusing outdated beliefs and worshiping some half blood psychopath leaving him parentless and penniless so there was nothing to go back to.
Draco thought of the opportunity that was going to await him tonight again and suddenly came up with a brilliant plan, he would cut down on his drinking, give the extra beer to Trish which should bring him even more opportunities and best of all, Potter was paying for everything. Draco may be beginning to form his own opinions and beliefs but he was still a Slytherin.
.....
Albus still couldn't get an answer from the Weasleys and when he tried to floo there he ended up at the public floo fireplace in Diagon Alley, deciding to investigate the mystery he apparated to the Burrow. The old wizard was actually shocked to find the house totally destroyed and the magical tent in the garden unoccupied, he knew he'd hardly been out of his office in weeks but didn't think he could be so behind that something like this could escape his attention. After finding no clues he apparated to the ministry in his search for answers.
As he marched through the ministry atrium he was astonished to find himself being stopped at the security checkpoint by a disgruntled guard.
"Name?"
"My dear man you must know who I am!"
"Don't see an identification badge so I'll ask again before calling security, Name?"
"Albus Percival Wulfric Brian Dumbledore, Order of Merlin, First Class." He realised that was the only thing he hadn't lost yet and the muttering guard seemed to have other ideas.
"Should have lost that as well, leaving the boy with those animals and never even checking on him," he stopped muttering and writing before looking back to the old wizard in front of him. "Reason for visit?"
"I don't see that's any of your business," Albus blustered.
The guard let out an audible sigh before sitting down his quill and going into 'procedures for idiots' mode, "let me explain the system to you, when a member of the public wants to enter the ministry they complete this form, receive a visitors badge and get directions to their destination. No form means no badge which means no entry, have you got that?"
Albus was desperate to dispute his status as a 'member of the public' but couldn't think of an argument so just nodded in agreement.
"Reason for visit?"
"To enquire about the location of some friends of mine."
"Didn't know you still had any." The guard muttered before asking, "what are their names and who do you want to see."
"The Weasleys and I think Madam Bones would be best suited to deal with my enquire."
Another mutter, "figures it would be them," before he delivered his bombshell, "Minister Bones is much to busy to deal with people who walk in here off the streets because they can't find someone, I'll get you an auror."
He was so taken aback by the fact that woman was now minister he didn't hear the guards first request, he glanced down and there was the guard's hand waiting on his wand.
Albus hadn't let another's hand touch his wand for many years and he was loathe to let this jumped up janitor get his mitts on it but his choices were limited and he needed to find the Weasleys. Watching as his wand was weighed definitely qualified as a new experience before turning to find that black auror standing right in front of him.
"What can I do for you?" Shack asked in a voice totally void of any warmth or enthusiasm before reading the badge the old coot had been forced to wear. "If you're looking for the Weasleys then I'm sorry but that information is classified so I'll wish you good day and show you the way out."
This was how Albus Dumbledore, greatest wizard of the age came to find himself standing on the ministry steps, he had been politely escorted out the doors and his visitor badge had disappeared as soon as he left the building. As he was standing there contemplating his next move, the hostile stares of passers-by began to annoy him so he apperated to the Weasleys nearest neighbours hoping he'd have better luck at the Lovegoods.
....
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