Feng Suyin groaned as she rolled on her side, trying to find a more comfortable position on the bed. She hadn't slept well in days as she was preoccupied with work and the wedding preparations. However, now that she knew the true colors of the man she was about to marry, she didn't want to waste time mourning the shattered illusion of love.
She sighed deeply and decided to sleep a bit longer since her shift would start late in the afternoon, but as her nose picked up an unfamiliar scent, Feng Suyin jolted up, her senses instantly on high alert.
It was certainly not the scent of her bed and room. It smelled like fresh green tea leaves and bamboo, which was surely not the scent she used at home. Upon sitting up and looking around the room, Feng Suyin remembered she had gone to see Ji Yuzhe last night.
She furrowed her brow, trying to piece together the previous night's events. Her memory was hazy, clouded by the emotional turmoil she had been experiencing. But as the fragments of recollection slowly came together, she remembered the confrontation with Ji Yuzhe. Her face turned bright red upon remembering her sudden marriage proposal to him.
Feng Suyin wanted to be swallowed up by the ground as she recalled her bold declaration. She had never been one to wear her heart on her sleeve, let alone propose marriage in such a reckless manner. Thankfully, Ji Yuzhe didn't take her words seriously and assumed she said it under the influence of alcohol.
Yet, despite his casual dismissal of her proposal, Feng Suyin couldn't explain her slight disappointment. She shook her head, determined to push aside her feelings of embarrassment and confusion.
With a deep breath, Feng Suyin swung her legs over the side of the bed and went to the adjoining washroom to freshen up. As she splashed cold water on her face, she stared at her reflection in the mirror. After dying at the hands of the family and the man she loved in her previous life, she sees the world with a newfound clarity. She was no longer the naive girl who sweet words and false promises had deceived.
Feng Suyin was now a woman who understood the depths of betrayal and the importance of guarding her heart. The entire Feng family was ruthless towards her. She would never allow anyone to manipulate or control her emotions again. Once tender and easily swayed, her heart had now hardened into a fortress, impenetrable to deceit and betrayal.
After taking a moment to sort her thoughts, Feng Suyin stepped out of the room and found Ji Yuzhe seated at the dining table with Uncle Jia behind him. Her face turned red as she looked at Ji Yuzhe. She was slightly relieved that he couldn't see her expression at that moment, but she could tell Uncle Jia was aware of what had transpired last night, given how broad his smile was.
Ji Yuzhe lifted his head and turned toward her direction as soon as he heard her light footsteps.
"Good morning."
Feng Suyin forced a small smile, trying to maintain her composure despite the awkwardness hanging in the air between them. She nodded in response, her stomach twisting with embarrassment and uncertainty. Despite her embarrassment from last night's events, she couldn't ignore the flutter in her chest at seeing him. She couldn't understand why she suddenly felt like this towards him.
"Good morning," she replied, her voice soft yet steady.
Feng Suyin avoided looking at him, focusing on the table separating them.
Uncle Jia cleared his throat, breaking the tension that lingered in the room.
"I made some breakfast for you both. Please, sit down and eat," he said warmly, gesturing to the dishes laid out on the table.
Feng Suyin offered him a grateful smile before sitting opposite Ji Yuzhe. As they ate in silence, she couldn't help but steal glances at him occasionally. His features were unreadable, his expression guarded. She thought he would be more at ease in her presence after their talk last night.
She focused on her food, determined not to let her thoughts wander to the confusing feelings swirling within her. However, now and then, she would catch Ji Yuzhe with a thoughtful expression, and she couldn't help but wonder what was on in his mind.
After a few moments, Ji Yuzhe spoke up.
"About last night..." he began, his voice trailing off as if unsure how to broach the subject.
Feng Suyin felt her heart rate quicken, her pulse thrumming in her ears. She held her breath, waiting for him to continue.
Ji Yuzhe hesitated for a moment before meeting her eyes directly.
"I understand that your current emotions can be... complicated," he said carefully, choosing his words with caution.
"But I want to make it clear what you said last night about marriage... I don't want you to feel pressured or obligated in any way. You don't need to feel responsible for me." Ji Yuzhe explained earnestly.
Feng Suyin felt a rush of relief flood through her at his words. She braced herself for rejection or awkwardness, but his understanding caught her off guard.
"Thank you," she murmured, her voice barely a whisper.
Ji Yuzhe offered her a small smile and dropped the topic, knowing dwelling on it too long would make her feel awkward.
"Have you considered what to do next?" he asked, reminding Feng Suyin of the problem ahead of her.
Feng Suyin grimaced at the thought. She knew she needed to face the family that adopted her and break things off with Ji Hanjun, but she knew it wouldn't be easy. However, she knew it was inevitable. Her love for them was replaced with hatred she didn't think she was capable of feeling.
"I decided not to continue with the research." She answered.
It was the reason why she died in her previous life anyway and why the Feng family still needed her. If it hadn't been for that research, she would not have been betrayed by those she trusted the most.
"Are you sure? I heard from Professor Xu that you are close to finishing it." Ji Yuzhe asked.
Feng Suyin shook her head. Professor Xu's words were valid, but she couldn't bring herself down that path since she already knew what awaited her after finishing the research. The memories of her previous life haunted her, reminding her of the pain and betrayal she endured.
"I've thought about it. The research should have been yours to begin with. If it weren't for me, you would have been able to finish it on time and achieve the success you rightfully deserve."
Professor Xu's first choice for a research partner was Ji Yuzhe, but because of the Feng family and Ji Hanjun's intervention, the position ended up in her hands.
"You don't need to worry about it. I've declined Professor Xu's offer for a reason. I didn't expect you to accept it because I thought you would rather gain more experience as a surgeon than as a researcher." Ji Yuzhe said.
Feng Suyin smiled weakly. Although she and Ji Yuzhe weren't close, she thought he knew her well. Despite their relationship's complexities and the misunderstandings that seemed to hover between them constantly, she found solace in his understanding and support.