When I saw Penny's name next to mine, I could only think:
"This is... very bad."
I glanced left to the end of the bench where the girl was sitting.
Her eyes were fixed on the table, as usual. I wasn't sure if she had even looked at the pairings.
Over the past week, I had done my best to keep my promise to Celeste to try and help Penny but I hadn't managed to get anything done.
The fact that I had finally found some people here at the Academy who enjoyed my company had made me forget how bad I was at making new friends.
I had even gone so far as to ask Penny to join me for lunch, but the conversation between us had never started, even though we were sitting at the same table.
But the fact that we did not know each other well was not the problem. No, it was her state of mind.
I knew the look that girl had permanently etched on her face. It was not simple sadness or despair. It was the quiet resignation of someone who had lost all hope and was only waiting for her predetermined end to come. It was a feeling I had faced twice before, but my best friend and girlfriend had managed to pull me away from it.
But Penny no longer had anyone in the school with whom she shared such a close relationship.
As my eyes returned to the leaderboard, another, less pleasant thought crossed my mind:
"Of all the people I had to get paired with... why her?!"
Of course, I was going to do everything I could to protect her... not that I had a choice.
But as my eyes fell on two other names, I realised that luck had absolutely nothing to do with the partner I had been assigned.
Sophia Thornton and Wilhelm Langley.
"...so this is the game he's playing."
This new event was, as usual, just an excuse for Skylark to get in the way of me and Sophia.
This time, however, the subtext was even more nefarious than usual.
Not only had he assigned us undesirable companions, but they were also the very people we had just formed an alliance with.
An alliance Skylark was determined to break.
"How does he know everything? There's only one possibility, isn't it?"
«Calm down Elizabeth...» whispered Sophia to my right.
After a few deep breaths, I followed her advice.
Celeste was sitting to my left, and if I'd started ranting about a possible traitor in our ranks, I was sure she wouldn't have liked it.
As I was looking at her, Celeste whispered:
"How lucky..."
Following her gaze I immediately understood the meaning behind those words.
Celeste Fitzroy and Philemon Hargrave
It was yet another pairing internal to our alliance but, in this case, Celeste had being assigned her perfect pattern.
"Luck... again, I don't think that's the case."
It couldn't have been a coincidence.
Even in the last doubles tournament, Celeste had gotten a favourable draw by avoiding Finch, who she'd have risked her life against.
And now this.
"It's as if Skylark doesn't want to put her in danger..."
I remembered Sophia's words of warning to me from a long time ago:
"What is someone so influential doing in here? Do you think the king could really have sent his right-hand man's daughter here to die??"
I shook my head.
"This is exactly what Skylark wants."
I trusted Celeste.
The despair I had seen on her face when she had discovered Aldric's fate could not be just an act. And so far she had always done everything she could to help me.
"Besides, she herself is the one who created the alliance, what sense would it make to do so only to destroy it immediately..."
But if I trusted her, and consequently Philemon, I could not say the same for the other three members.
"Even though I like her, I don't really know Nicole... she's the only one who's paired with someone outside the alliance," I thought as I looked at the leaderboard again.
Her parten was a student in the lower parts of the rankings. She was not getting a favorable treatement like Celeste.
"Penny and Langley are undoubtedly the most suspicious, and they happen to be the ones paired with Sophia and me... What if one of them fakes their death during the test to eliminate one of us..."
It was pointless, these thoughts would get me nowhere. I had no choice but to play the hand I was dealt.
«The test will take place in two days, today's and tomorrow's classes will be cancelled to give you time to prepare. Good luck!» Skylark said before leaving the classroom.
As the students stood up, probably to confer with their assigned partners, a hand closed tightly on my wrist.
Before I could turn around, Sophia began to drag me out of the classroom.
"Ah, like old times... it's been a while."
By the time we reached my room, I was out of breath and my wrist was screaming for mercy.
As soon as we entered, Sophia started pacing up and down, biting her lip as usual.
«And you told me to calm down!» I tried to joke.
«I'm very worried,» Sophia blurted out without looking at me.
«I feel you, I would be worried too if I was paired up with an idiot like Wilhelm,» I tried again to lighten the mood, to no avail.
«It's you I'm worried about! Even though he doesn't like me, I don't think Wilhelm is going to sacrifice his life to take me out... but... Penelope...» Sophia muttered and turned to me.
Looking at her face, I realised the situation was serious.
The only time I had seen her so out of it was after our duel with Finch and Foster. Her lips were trembling and she seemed on the verge of tears.
«I know... I will do my best to protect her. You know I'm strong, I should have no problem keeping her safe until the end of the trial,» I tried to reassure her, but it was clear from my voice that I wasn't all that confident.
«What if you can't? What if the trial forces you to act separately?» replied Sophia, voicing my doubts.
«Well... Skylark said it would be a test based on cooperation, it wouldn't make sense to separate us!»
But I knew that argument didn't hold water.
Skylark had repeatedly acted in underhanded ways to put us on the spot. He could have twisted his own words again if it suited him.
«You can't trust anything that bastard says!» Sophia said, «no, we have to do something before the time of the trial comes.»
Sophia resumed her restless march. After a few moments she muttered:
«I see no other way, we must put Celeste's plan into action tomorrow.»
It wasn't like her to suggest such a risky thing, but I understood her reaction perfectly.
Sophia hated feeling powerless and there was nothing she could do to help me in this particular ordeal.
«You know it's a bad idea. Tomorrow, with classes cancelled, the second floor will be swarming with professors.»
«MIGHT AS WELL RISK IT!» Sophia shouted, completely losing control, «rather than let you take part in that stupid trial. I'd rather risk everything. I... can't lose you.»
«Don't be like this... more than anything, I need your cool thinking right now,» I whispered as I pulled her close to me.
Sophia buried herself in my chest, hiding her face from my gaze.
«How can you be so calm...» she murmured in a choked voice.
«I think the part of me that was afraid to die never left the arena where we fought Finch. I'm still afraid... but like you, I'm afraid of losing the person I love. But I know how strong you are and I know you will get through this.»
«I... I have faith in your abilities too. It's just... Penny...»
«I know... I'll see if I can talk to her later. Maybe the prospect of a life or death situation will be enough to shake her out of the state she's in right now!»
I was by no means convinced of that, but at the moment my priority was to calm my girlfriend.
I caressed her hair for several minutes before asking her:
«Have you calmed down a bit?»
«Yes, but... can we stay like this for a little while longer?» replied Sophia, her face still pressed against my chest.
«Sure... as long as you want.»
The fact that she could ask me such a thing without hesitation was proof of how far our relationship had come.
But when, a few minutes later, Sophia broke away from me and ran to the bathroom, I realised that we could still improve.
The wet patches on my shirt were proof that there was something she still didn't want me to see.
"I'll survive... I'll do whatever it takes to come back to her," I thought, clenching my fists.
***
When she came out of the bathroom, her eyes still red, Sophia sat down on the bed next to me.
«Are you feeling better?»
«Yes... thank you.»
I wanted to tell her that she didn't need to be ashamed to cry in front of me, but I didn't want to embarrass her any further. So I decided to change the subject.
«The plan, the alliance... it doesn't make sense anymore, don't you think?»
«Why do you say that? I thought you agreed it was the only way to go.»
«I thought so, but... now it is certain that we have a traitor in our ranks. These pairings can't just be a coincidence.»
Sophia sighed:
«I know it doesn't look good. But maybe there is another explanation for what has happened. Or at least I want to believe that there is.»
«But what are the alternatives?» I asked, surprised.
I hadn't expected Sophia to be so trusting. But, after all, the alliance was the only thing giving us hope at the moment... if there was even the slightest chance that the mole wasn't among us, I would have clung to it too.
«Skylark knows the alliance exists and who its members are, but... it wasn't necessarily one of us who told him. We were careless, Elizabeth... a guard could have seen us entering Celeste's room.
After all, the school was swarming with them until recently. Seven people in one room is bound to be suspicious.»
«It could be as you say, but... if that's the case, they could also have listened to what we were saying and know all about our plan to escape!»
«I don't think that's possible. The spell that protects our rooms prevents that. It also shields against possible divination spells, from what Celeste told me.»
«I see... but it's a spell from the school, Skylark could have deactivated it to allow snooping!»
«I thought so too. But Celeste also put a barrier around her room to warn her of such intrusions.»
«I didn't know about that... you two are getting really intimate, aren't you?» I tried to tease her, but it was obvious that Sophia wasn't in the mood, so immediately stopped.
«I know we can't be sure that's what happened... but I still want to believe in our comrades. That's all I can do,» Sophia said.
«All right. I don't know if I can trust them completely, but I trust you unconditionally,» I told her with a smile.
«Speaking of the alliance... we'll have to talk to them about these things later.»
«You're right, but until then...» I pulled her to me and kissed her cheek, «let's relax a bit, I can see you're still nervous.»
«I… thank you.»
***
When we knocked on Celeste's door, we were very late.
Due to the nervousness of finding out who our partner was, neither of us had slept very well the night before. So while we were spending the time after lunch cuddling, we had fallen asleep together.
The owner of the room replied with her usual "Come in!", but I knew from her tone that something was wrong. As soon as I opened the door, it was not difficult to see what the problem was.
Nicole, Philemon and Celeste were the only ones in the room.
«Uhm... sorry we're late!» I exclaimed.
«No worries, have a seat! I think Penny and Will might have had a few setbacks too,» Celeste said.
But it was obvious from her tone that she wasn't holding out much hope. She probably thought we wouldn't show up either.
The minutes passed but there was no sign of the two absentees.
«I don't think they're coming, Celeste,» Nicole whispered cautiously.
Celeste did not even turn to look at her. For the last few minutes she had been staring at the door, her fingers crossed in front of her eyes.
But suddenly she sprang to her feet and slammed her hand on the table, startling us all.
«So that old bastard thinks it takes so little to mess with us!»
A smile had returned to Celeste's face. But it was not one of her usual ones. It wasn't bright or easygoing, it was a sharp, cold one that didn't extend to her sweet brown eyes. It kinda reminded me of Skylark's.
«Well, I think he's succeeding. Both Wilhelm and Penny probably think there's a traitor in our midst... and I can't say I blame them,» I commented.
I knew that wasn't what Celeste wanted to hear right now, but I wasn't going to be a yes-woman just because it was easier.
«I'm not mad at them... I'm angry at Skylark,» Celeste said, nodding, «he may have won the first round, but it's not going to go his way. Let's go!» she blurted out, heading for the door.
«Let's go? Where to?» asked Nicole.
«To get our comrades back!» exclaimed Celeste in a firm voice.
«Wait a minute... if there's no traitor, this situation happened because we were careless and exposed ourselves when we came here. We shouldn't be giving out information that Skylark...» began Sophia.
«It doesn't matter. He already knows everything. And if it pleases him, he can take what I'm about to do as my personal declaration of war on him,» Celeste interrupted her, the smile spreading to her eyes.
"She really is a born leader..." I thought as I followed her through the corridors of the west wing.
The fact that someone like her was in this school was truly incredible. She could have been an important asset to the King in more ways than just being a human weapon.
"Why is she here... and why does Skylark favour her so much..."
There was one thing that could explain everything: the words we had found in Aldric's file.
"Prime candidate... what if she's the one?"
In that case, the fact that the Academy was doing everything it could to keep her alive would have made sense but...
"Her intellect is her most powerful weapon. If she is destined to lose it... her magical power is not so out of the ordinary. Unless..."
An innate power.
I wouldn't have blamed her if she'd kept one hidden all this time. In fact, I hoped she had.
Celeste's pace was so determined that we reached Wilhelm's room in no time.
The girl immediately began to knock violently. If it hadn't been for the protection spell, I was afraid she would have kicked the door down.
«What the hell?» we heard Wilhelm's voice from inside.
«Will, get your ass out here!»
"Usually she's so polite... like Sophia, this situation has made her completely snap. Or... maybe this is how she really is."
The boy could only obey. Perhaps he too had realised that Celeste would continue to pound the door with her fists into the night if he didn't.
When he found us all outside his door, Wilhelm seemed surprised to see us there.
«I...» he started, but Celeste immediately cut him off:
«Why didn't you come to the meeting? If there was a problem, you could have told me at least.»
«I... I'm sorry. I would have come to talk to you later...I had to think,» Wilhelm replied, composing himself, «I have decided to leave your alliance.»
The tension was palpable before Celeste replied.
«I understand. I would like you to reconsider. If you want to leave because you think there's a mole between us, I can't blame you. But there's a simpler explanation for why Skylark found out about us.»
«It's not because of that. The risk is high, but I think cooperation is still the best way to ensure our survival,» Wilhelm replied.
«Then... why do you want to leave?»
The boy seemed to hesitate, but the quick look he gave me told me all I needed to know.
At this point, his words were just a formality.
«I... think cooperating is the best course of action. But there are people with whom I do not wish to associate with. Being allied with you has brought that particular pairing to me, and I cannot accept it.»
Before I could take a step or open my mouth, Celeste stretched out an arm and placed it between Wilhelm and me.
«I thought we agreed we needed all the help we could get,» Celeste replied.
«I know you're right, but... I just can't stand this. You know very well, the only reason we fought together during the battle is because my best friend was killed by one of those damn powers...»
"So that's why... I kinda expected something like that. But Sophia... Sophia has nothing to do with it."
I made to open my mouth again, but this time it was Sophia herself who interrupted me.
«You don't have to like me,» my girlfriend blurted out, moving closer to him.
The boy looked away, as if he saw something that disgusted him, but that did not stop her from continuing.
«I think you have every right to hate me actually. I'm not going to stand here and tell you that I'm a helpless innocent girl and that it's unfair of you to put the blame on me. But from what you said, you know very well how much it hurts to lose someone dear. It happened to me during the battle... and I can't let it happen again.»
"Sophia..."
«The person that matters most to me is here at this school. I'd give anything to get out of here alive with her. Working with someone who despises me is no problem. In two days, I'll do whatever it takes to keep you from dying, whether you like it or not. You, on the other hand... do you want your hatred for me to ruin your chances of getting out of here alive?»
Perhaps for the first time, the boy looked her in the face.
«I... I have to think about it,» he mumbled after a moment, clearly struck by Sophia's words
«You know where to find me,» Celeste said before Wilhelm shut the door on us.
Immediately afterwards she patted my girlfriend's shoulder.
«My girl, those strange sounds from the other day weren't the only thing I didn't expect to come out of your mouth. You can be quite convincing!»
The memory of that particular encounter with Celeste made Sophia and me blush in unison.
«Well, let's go to Penny now,» Celeste said.
"I... I don't think acting like this it's going to work out with her."
Indeed, when we arrived outside her room and Celeste began her attack, no one responded.
"This is bad... Celeste could actually ask Sophia to break the door down right now... and she might actually do it".
That approach had worked for me in the past, but that was probably only because I had always been attracted to Sophia. If she did something like that now, Penny would probably be terrified.
"After seeing how Sophia handled the situation with Wilhelm...I want to try it too."
«Celeste... can I be the one to deal with Penny? I'll find a way to talk to her tomorrow and convince her to come back to us.»
The girl arched an eyebrow at me, but when she saw my determined expression, she nodded.
«Alright! We'll just have to wait then... damn I got all worked up for nothing. I guess we can say goodbye here for now.»
«Can I talk to you first, Celeste?» I asked, glancing at Sophia who nodded at me.
«Sure thing! » the girl exclaimed energetically.
And so, after saying goodbye to the others, we headed for her room.
«Brings back memories, doesn't it?» said Celeste, handing me a cup of tea, «remember the tea party when we first became friends? Actually, it's been a while since we've hung out here alone!»
"Come to think of it... I've been neglecting her a bit lately."
«Yeah... we should start training together again!»
But Celeste, probably sensing what I was thinking, smiled at me and said,
«Don't worry... you've been enjoying your newlywed life with Sophia, haven't you?»
"Why does she have to phrase it like this? I guess I do want to marry her in the future..."
«Somehow, yeah... it all happened so fast, it still doesn't really feel real. To think that I could be so happy even in this hellhole...»
«I should have realised it sooner... now I understand why she always looked at me so glumly!» Celeste chuckled.
«Yeah... I'm kind of surprised that you two are getting along right now... you know, from what you just said and the fact that you're complete opposites.»
«I mean, aren't you opposites too? And from what I saw, you girls are getting along really well!»
"We're actually quite similar... we're both two girls who like to talk big even though we're an insecure mess on the inside..."
But I didn't want to reveal that side of Sophia without her permission, so I just nodded.
«Have you had sex yet?» Celeste asked suddenly, making me spit out my tea on the table.
«Celeste!»
«Sorry! I was just curious how it went!»
«You could have asked in a less... direct way!»
«You may have noticed, but I've kind of stopped trying to keep up appearances lately... now that I don't have that huge crowd of people buzzing around me there's no real reason for it. So, did you do it?»
«No...» I replied blushing, «we haven't even kissed properly yet...»
«WHAT?!»
For a moment I thought Amy's spirit had descended to possess Celeste. She would have reacted the same way.
«You're doing that kind of stuff in the corridors and you didn't even kiss each other?»
"This is so humiliating... why are we even talking about this?"
«We kissed, just not... you know. And what you saw...It was kind of a in the moment thing!»
«Well, I'm not going to judge... as long as you're managing to have fun in this place, I guess you can do whatever you girls like...» Celeste sighed.
I took the opportunity to steer the conversation back in the direction I wanted.
«Celeste, could you tell me what you know about Penny? So that I may have a better chance of helping her tomorrow?»
But my friend gave me a sad smile.
«The truth is... I can't really tell you anything of value. I vaguely remember her being the daughter of a provincial baronet... honestly, if it wasn't for the education I was given... I probably wouldn't even remember her name.»
I looked at her, stunned:
«Wasn't she one of your friends?»
«Yes... but let's just say it was a bit of a stretch to call them friends. They were just people who orbited around me due to my social status. If you had studied in a bigger city you wouldn't be so surprised. It often happens to high ranking nobles like myself.»
Celeste's tone was wistful.
«We didn't spend a lot of time together, Liz... but I think that, apart from Philemon, you are the person who knows me best.»
"...I don't even know who the real you is..."
But this was just another reminder that being a high-ranking noble was not the key to happiness.
All her life, Celeste had probably had to watch out for people who pretended to be friends, but were only out to take advantage of her.
«I don't really know you well, Celeste. You're always super cheerful, but sometimes I think it's just an act and you're really just a cold calculating person on the inside. You act proper most of the time, but you can also be so tone-deaf... and when you were angry today, you were kind of scary... but I really like you. You are a lot of fun and I really respect you as a mage.»
I decided that telling her the truth was the best thing to do.
After all, it was the one thing she never got to hear from her fake friends.
It was Celeste's turn to be astonished.
«You... don't mince your words, do you? But maybe that's why I consider you a dear friend. A real one,» she said with a half-smile,
«So... which parts of what I told you make up the real you?»
«How about... all of them?» Celeste replied in a mysterious tone.
We burst out laughing.
«But I'm sorry Liz, I really don't know how I can help you with Penny...»
«I'll... think of something. But while we are asking tough questions... Celeste, why do you think Skylark is protecting you?»
This time Celeste did not seem surprised by the question. Her expression was one of gratitude instead.
The fact that I had asked her directly was proof of the trust I had in her after all.
«I don't really know... but I have a theory!»
«A theory?»
«Yes... I think... Father might know about all of this and he's propping me up...»
«Propping you up...!? But if you win, you'll just become a weapon! You'll pretty much die anyway in a sense!»
But Celeste shook her head:
«You don't understand Liz. For Father to have a Fitzroy become the new Sir Aldric would be a huge honour. It would bring even more fame to our household... something far more important than my life.»
"Maybe she and Sophia do have something in common after all..."
***
After what seemed like hours, the door to Penny's room finally opened.
I had woken up at the crack of dawn that morning and, after giving Sophia a kiss, I had made my way to my waiting place in the corridor.
I waited for the girl to come out of her room and see me before I said hello.
It was imperative that I didn't startle her.
«Hey Penny, good morning!»
«Oh... g-good morning...» the girl said, barely looking at me.
"Things are already not looking too hot..."
But I wasn't going to give up.
«Don't worry, I'm not here to yell at you or anything. I just want to talk... could you listen to me for a while?» I asked her in a soft but firm tone.
«I... ok,» Penny replied.
She didn't seem particularly enthusiastic about the prospect, but the fact that she had agreed was a small victory.
We traversed the school together and we reached the dining hall without meeting a soul. There were only 24 students left after all and it was also very early.
Penny was probably hoping to eat undisturbed without running into Celeste.
After taking our trays, we sat down at one of the many empty tables.
"Where to start..."
«Why didn't you come to the meeting yesterday? Is it because you think there is a traitor in our midst?» I asked, trying not to sound like I was accusing her.
The girl was silent for a few seconds and then said:
«I don't know... but it doesn't matter. The headmaster... he sees everything anyway. Whatever plan we try to make... it won't work...»
"As I thought... she has lost all hope..."
«I don't think everything always goes his way. You know, he's tried to kill me several times since I've been here... but he hasn't succeeded yet!»
Only silence from Penny. But then...
«You're here because you're my partner, aren't you? I'm sorry, I know I'm going to be a nuisance.»
I knew it wouldn't help to deny it. But what else could I do?
"Amy... what would you do in this situation? I... I'm not good with words..."
I thought back to all the situations I had been in over the past few months. I had often caused so much trouble with my big mouth.
But in the end things had always worked out. Why? Perhaps it was because I had told the truth in the end.
«Our lives are intertwined, Penny and I... I don't want to die. What I want is for you to do your best to survive. I don't know you well, it's true, and to be honest I don't care much about you but, even though I'm speaking mainly out of self-interest, I still don't want to see you dead.»
Penny's eyes remained fixed on her toast, but my brutally honest words still seemed to have struck a chord.
«Dying... that's what's coming for me in the end anyway... why should I resist?»
"Those words... I said pretty much the same thing to Sophia the first week."
«I thought the same thing a long time ago. But I'm still here! I'm still fighting, and I believe that if we work together, we can win.»
For the first time, Penny looked up, but she did not have the reassured expression I had hoped to see: her face was alive with anger.
«You are just like Celeste. Let me guess, you're going to promise you are not going to let me die now, right? Because that's what she told all my friends, and guess how that ended,» the girl blurted out.
"Celeste... you loud-mouthed idiot..."
But I had no right to criticise her.
«I can't promise you anything. You see, I lost my best friend in the battle. I promised her I would bring her home... I don't think I'm ever going to be able forgive myself for not keeping my word. But... I'm not going to sit here and feel sorry for myself. I will continue to fight to survive and carry this sin with me forever... It's my way to make it up to her.»
Penny's anger seemed to subside:
«I'm sorry you lost your friend...» she whispered, lowering her eyes.
«It's all right. I didn't tell you that to make you feel pity for me... you've lost a lot of important people too, haven't you? I'm sorry as well.»
«I... we weren't really that close. But... even so... I still really miss them,» the girl murmured.
«We have to survive for them as well.»
«I... don't know...»
It was obvious that it would not be easy to change her mind, but I could now see cracks in her conviction now.
«As I said, I can't promise anything... but at least let me show you what I can do to help you. Tomorrow I'll make you understand that we have a chance to win and escape from this place,» I tried to encourage her again.
«I'm not that strong... I don't really have anything to look forward to. You have that girl, don't you? That's why you want to live so badly...»
"Is it that obvious?"
«That's right... I have someone to come back to.»
«I... don't have anyone like that...»
"..."
«I... maybe I can help you with that... I can only have one girlfriend, but I have lots of room for new friends! I know this sounds really fake coming from me, since I said I don't really care about you. But... that can change. I've made friends with people I never thought I'd get on with.»
"What am I saying..."
«You know, there's a person that always tells me that I'm extremely obnoxious and people usually find me unpleasant. I'm a commoner too, by the way... but if you want to hang out... I'm here.»
Unexpectedly, after those ramblings, Penny's eyes finally met mine. Something had lit up in those dull eyes.
"Maybe it really was that simple... After all, the survival instinct is something natural in us humans..."
Maybe Penny just needed something to hold on to. It wouldn't have worked with everyone, but... for a girl who probably only made friends because of her aristocratic upbringing, a real friendship might have been the way out.
«I... if you'd have me...»
***
«Man, I'm exhausted,» I thought as I walked back to my room.
It was almost time for dinner. I had spent the whole day with Penny, trying to get to know her.
From the first moment, I realised we didn't have much in common.
Penny's interests were pretty typical for a girl our age: pretty clothes, the latest gossip about the royal heirs, and the popular steamy romance novels that were all the rage these days.
A magic nerd like me really didn't have much to say about any of that.
But as it turned out, Penny was actually a very talkative person, and she seemed grateful that I was willing to listen to her ramblings.
She also seemed very interested in my relationship with Sophia, so we had talked about it a bit.
"Maybe the fact that nobles don't like people like me is just a stereotype, or maybe it's just the older generations that have a problem with it... but actually it's probably just wrong of me to make assumptions about people based on their status..."
After all, the friends I had made so far in the Academy were all nobles... and it looked like I was about to get make another one.
"It might be nice to talk to someone who isn't a weirdo like Sophia and Celeste once in a while... but I guess birds of a feather flock together!" I thought, smiling as my girlfriend rushed over to greet me.
«How did it go?» Sophia asked worriedly.
"Having her here, welcoming me into my room like this... it really feels like she's my wife!"
«SUCCESS!» I shouted as I hugged her, «I can't believe I actually got through her!»
«I knew you could do it!»
«Did you?»
«You can actually be... very convincing when you want to be...»
"Is she thinking about my confession to her?"
«Well, I'm going to take a shower before dinner. Being social is actually very exhausting... go without me if you're hungry, I'll join you later!»
«I'll... wait for you,» Sophia said with a strange look on her face.
"I guess she was really worried... she probably still is... after all, it's not like I'm out of the woods yet. Even if Penny's feeling a bit better... I still don't know if she'll be able to help as much tomorrow..." I thought as I undressed and stepped under the hot water.
I finished my shower quickly and, after drying my hair and dressing, returned to the room.
I didn't want to keep Sophia waiting after I had spent the whole day outside.
«Sophia I'm ready! Lets g-» I started, but my voice faded into nothingness.
Sophia was lying on the bed, staring at me, her face flushed.
My eyes fell on her bare legs.
"This is… a rare sight…"
She usually even slept in her thigh highs. When I had asked her why, she had said it was because of the cold.
But I suspected she was not telling the truth.
I was convinced that she was just being self-conscious. After all, because of her training, her legs were very different from those of an average girl.
But from what little I could see between her skirt and her socks, I found them extremely attractive.
I had even told her that, but she had quickly shut me down... or so I thought.
«Is this supposed to be my reward for working hard today?» I asked her, giggling, «if so, I'm really grateful!»
But Sophia's expression remained serious.
«Elizabeth... do you want to... do it?»
I knew from her tone that I didn't need to ask what she meant.
I stood there dazed for a moment.
"Does she...really want to?...This is so sudden...but she's the one asking, so..."
I approached her, my heart pounding and my mind clouded with desire.
I climbed onto the bed and crawled towards her.
I felt Sophia tremble as one of my hands rested on her thigh.
Slowly, I moved closer and closer, until I was on top of her. I could feel her torso rise and fall under my body, her breathing heavy.
Standing on my knees, one hand still feeling her leg while the other went to the collar of her shirt.
One button.
Two buttons.
I could see her collarbone now. I couldn't resist running my index finger along it, making Sophia shiver at the contact.
My eyes moved to her face.
"This expression..."
Sophia's face was turned to the right, her eyes closed and narrowed as she was biting her lip.
"Is this… really alright?"
Slowly, through the lust that besieged my mind, doubts began to creep in.
"Is this really how our first time is supposed to go? Me treating her like a doll… she's not even looking at me…"
I deflated like a balloon, my fingers inert on the third button of her shirt.
"She's the one who asked me to do it, but... it doesn't really feel right. She probably decided to try because we might die tomorrow, but... she's not really ready for it."
Sophia was an adult, as Amy had told me some time ago, I didn't need to infantilise her,
But both she and I were completely inexperienced in this area. Rushing things could have ruined something magical.
I saw Sophia barely open her eyes, probably wondering why I had stopped.
"If I don't do something... she might think it's her fault..."
It was then that the natural course of action occurred to me.
After all, like Celeste had told me yesterday:
"You are doing that kinda stuff in the corridors and didn't even kiss each other?"
«Sophia...» I whispered softly.
The girl finally opened her eyes and they fixed on mine.
«I'm gonna kiss you now.»
I lowered my head and our lips met.
Slowly I opened mine.
I began to gently caress her lower lip with my tongue where it was wounded.
I felt Sophia gasp in surprise as she opened her mouth slightly.
As I began the deep kiss, she shivered beneath me.
The first contact was fleeting, just as it had been that day in the dinner hall.
Sophia fled from me, withdrawing into herself.
I waited patiently for her to approach me again.
It was an embrace that began awkwardly and tentatively, but slowly gave way to overflowing passion.
Sophia's arms tightened around me, pulling me close.
"This is how it should be... this is how I want our first time to be... I want her to want me as much as I do... I want us to do it together!" I thought before my mind clouded over again.
In the end, I was lying happily in silence on Sophia's chest.
«That was... very different from the other times...» Sophia whispered.
«In a good or bad way?»
«In a... very good way.»
«Sophia?»
«Uhm?»
«If I survive tomorrow... I want us to go all the way next time...»
Sophia stiffened, but then said:
«Why wait? Didn't I give you permission?»
"If I have learned anything today, it is that sometimes being honest is the easiest thing to do."
«Sophia... I don't want to do everything myself... I know as much about this kind of stuff as you do. What if I hurt you or you don't like it? I don't want to mess it up.
I don't want to take the lead in something like this… I think, since we're both inexperienced, it's something we should share together!»
Sophia was silent for a moment before answering.
«Is that why you stopped? I... I'm sorry. I thought I was ready, but when you started... I... I realised I didn't know what to do.»
«Don't worry... I have no idea what to do either. But that's why we have to experiment together.
It'll be super awkward, we'll probably make a mess and even hurt each other... but as long as we do it together, I think it'll be fun anyway.»
«I... you're right. I'm sorry to put all the burden on you... it's just strange to me that you've never done this before. You seem much more confident...»
«If I'm confident, it's because I find you irresistible.»
«I... also...»
«I'll make sure you think the same about me when I come back alive tomorrow!» I said, looking up to meet her gaze.
«Why are you making it sound like a threat?»
Before I started kissing her again, I said: «I don't know. I guess you could consider this my personal declaration of war on you!»