"LOVE?"
I quickly wiped away my tears, keeping my head down. Professor Zaiden moved to greet the woman entering the room.
As I looked up, my gaze met with his fiancée's before she turned to the Professor. I quickly averted my eyes as the Professor wrapped his arm around the woman's waist and kissed her cheek.
"I've been looking all over for you. So, you were here all along."
"Ah, I was just checking on one of my students who got into a fight earlier. She hurt her lips."
"Oh my, that's painful," she looked at me sympathetically. "Are you alright?"
I wanted to roll my eyes in annoyance, but I chose to force a smile instead. "I'm fine, thank you. It's just a minor scratch."
She nodded and turned back to the Professor. "By the way, I'll be staying in the city for a few days. I thought we could spend more time together."
Professor Zaiden smiled, but I could sense the heaviness in his eyes. "That sounds great, love. We'll make the most out of it."
I just watched the two of them, feeling the cold air brushing against our conversation. My feelings became heavier as I watched them.
"Ms. Laurenestine Valencia, this is Shannon, my fiancée," Professor Zaiden introduced us, and I forced a smile despite the turmoil inside me.
"Hi, Ms. Shannon. Nice to meet you," I greeted with all the strength I could muster.
Shannon smiled politely, but her eyes seemed to scrutinize me, as if she could sense something beneath the surface. "Nice to meet you too, Laurenestine. I hope your lip feels better soon."
"Thank you," I replied, trying to sound composed.
"Love, I'll just finish up here, and we can go grab some dinner later, okay?" Professor Zaiden said to Shannon with his affectionate tone.
"Sure, take your time. I'll be waiting outside," she replied, giving him a quick peck on the cheek before leaving the clinic.
As soon as she was out of earshot, Professor Zaiden turned to me with a serious expression. "We need to talk."
My heart sank, anticipating a conversation I wasn't sure I was ready for. "About what, Prof?"
"About us. About what's been happening," he said, his gaze intensely.
I looked down, unable to meet his eyes. "I don't know what's happening, Prof. One moment, you're distant, and the next, you're attentive. You told me about your fiancée, the wedding, and now you're saying it's all a misunderstanding?"
He sighed, running a hand through his hair in frustration. "I didn't want to involve you in my personal life. Shannon and I are going through a rough patch, and I thought it would be better not to burden you with our problems."
"But you mentioned it, Prof. You made me believe there was something between us," I said, my voice trembling.
"I never meant to mislead you. Things are complicated, and I didn't want to drag you into it. I care about you, but my commitment is to Shannon. I can't change that," he explained, his eyes searching for mine for understanding.
Tears welled up in my eyes, and I tried to blink them away. "So, everything we shared, the moments we had together—it meant nothing to you?"
He reached out and gently cupped my face, wiping away a tear with his thumb. "It meant something, Laurenestine. I care about you, but I can't let it go beyond that. I'm committed to Shannon, and I need you to understand that."
I pulled away, overwhelmed with a mix of emotions. "I thought you felt something more, Prof. I thought... I thought maybe there was a chance for us."
"I'm sorry if I gave you false hope. I never intended to hurt you," he apologized sincerely.
"Does Shannon know about us, about the two of us?" I asked, my voice barely above a whisper.
He hesitated before answering, "No, and I'd appreciate it if we keep it that way. It's already complicated, and involving her would only make things worse."
I nodded, wiping away more tears. "I understand. I just need time to process everything."
"I'm truly sorry, Laurenestine. If there's anything I can do to make things easier for you, please let me know," he said, genuine concern in his eyes.
I managed a weak smile. "I appreciate that, Prof. I'll be okay."
As he left the clinic to join Shannon, I couldn't push away the regret and bitterness in my heart. The pain on my lips seemed trivial compared to the ache in my heart.
I sat down by the bed, filled with reminders of the moments Professor Zaiden and I spent together. The questions swirling in my mind seem to have no answers.
Suddenly, the nurse entered the clinic, looking at me with a worried expression. "Are you okay, Miss Laurenestine?"
I nodded, but I couldn't bring myself to speak. The sadness enveloping me was too much to hide.
"Here's the prescription for your wound. Apply it properly to speed up the healing process," she said, handing me the prescription. I couldn't respond properly, but I thanked her sincerely.
While reading the prescription, I couldn't help but recall Professor's words. He claimed not to remember our conversation, yet it seemed like he remembered it instantly. I couldn't understand. Did he pretend not to remember in case someone overheard us? Despite my attempts to convince myself, something felt off.
After class, I went straight home because no matter how focused I was in class, my mind kept drifting. I wanted to see Professor Zaiden again, to talk to him. But every time I remembered his words and his affection towards other women, a heaviness settled in my chest.
With a heavy heart, I stared at my room. I have pictures of him everywhere. I painted him whenever I had spare time, as painting became my hobby. Initially, my works were mostly black and white, but they became colorful after meeting him.
I also have a collection of perfumes he likes, displayed in my room for over a year. The color of my room's walls is Professor Zaiden's favorite. Even in his favorite hobby of reading, I followed suit, hoping to become his ideal girl. I wanted us to be alike, so he'd notice our similarities. I felt desperate, yet I found enjoyment in it. Only Professor Zaiden treated me with respect.
I remembered the first day he noticed me, saving me from a group almost assaulting me. He fought for me, and that day, I promised him my first, knowing he couldn't love me but would use me repeatedly.
I wiped the tears falling from my eyes. I took my phone and pressed a button in a private folder. I clicked on the video of our intimacy. If this video doesn't ruin them, then I'll plan my second move. This isn't the last time, Professor Zaiden. You'll be mine. Now that I know we have a connection?
I changed my status on Instagram and messaged Shannon. She's online now, and with just one click, she'll find out. I noticed my hands trembling as I scrolled through. Even I'm nervous about what I'm about to do.
Why am I so desperate? Why am I like this? I don't know why I'm like this, but this is the only thing that makes me happy. Professor Zaiden is the person who brings me joy and contentment.
No, I have to do it. I've thought about this several times; am I going to give up now?
[Me]
I envy you.
[Shannon]
You again?
[Me]
I have a surprise for you. You will be genuinely surprised by this.
She just ignored it, but I didn't wait. I immediately pressed a video, but I was startled because I heard a knock on the door. My phone fell to the floor, and I stared at it for a while before picking it up again.
Another knock, and that's when I woke up and placed the phone on the table. I wasn't expecting any visitors now because I'm not that close to anyone. Is it the landlady? But I've paid my rent here.
When I opened it, I couldn't move as he pulled me and hugged me. Even though his cologne wasn't familiar, I knew the touch and warmth of his body.
"Prof?"
"I miss you, Laurene."
The corner of my eyes warmed, burying my head in his chest. He pulled away and looked at me. Hope rekindled as I saw the familiar color of his eyes.
"A-Aero..." I responded, smiling at him.
"I thought you were really gone, especially after you said earlier that you couldn't leave Shannon because of your commitment to her. What are you doing here?"
His smile disappeared, and he looked at me seriously. "Don't mind what I said to you earlier. We haven't talked about it yet. The important thing is, I'm here now."
I wanted to respond, but I was afraid. I feared he might change again and say something to me.
"Have you eaten?" He asked calmly. I just shook my head in response.
I glanced at what he was holding when he raised it. "I was right. I'm glad I bought dinner for us. Can I go inside?"
I opened the door widely and let him in. I suddenly got nervous, remembering his picture inside, but then I remembered it was in my room. He might call me obsessed or weird again.