My head tilts to the side as my eyes blink rapidly in immense confusion.
What exactly am I looking at right now?
The longer I keep staring and trying to decipher the painting in front of me, the harder it becomes to actually break down the art piece. I actually can't tell what I'm looking at. Is it a landscape of a mountainous area or a portrait of someone or a cross of both? I can't lie, whoever painted this did a shit job. Then again, what do people say about art being in the eye of the observer or is that what they say about beauty? Perhaps I'm the stupid one here. Maybe I'm simply incapable of activating that part of my brain.
Through my peripheral, I notice the woman standing beside me watching me with a wry look on her face and it forces me to stop acting a fool. I quickly stand erect and pretend to know exactly what the painting means by rubbing my chin with an intellectual glow in my eyes, nodding my head to look like I belong here among these posh individuals.
Once she walks away to observe the next piece of art, the sound of her heels click-clacking against the marble floor echoing away, I scowl at her retreating form.
Then I reach into my pocket and quickly sneak in a picture of the painting when nobody is watching. Without any context, I send the picture to Taylor.
Instantly, I receive a reply that reads, what exactly am I looking at?
Exactly, I respond.
"If you look really close, you'll see a penis in that painting."
I jump a little at the introduction of the new voice and quickly turn around to put a face to the voice.
When my eyes land on the familiar black dreadlocks of Richard, a smile breaks out on my face, and I bob my head up and down curtly to silently greet him. He doesn't replicate the expression on my face, but his eyebrows flick up and his eyes lighten up the tiniest bit to acknowledge my presence. It has been a while since I've last seen him in person. The only time we ever interact is on his stream.
He stands beside me to observe the painting before us and I too focus my gaze on it again, hoping that taking my eyes off it changes my perspective. It doesn't.
"I don't see it," I say to him, breaking the silence between us.
"See what?"
"The penis," I clarify.
"Tilt your head to the right slightly," he instructs me.
I do it and when he tells me that I've tilted my head too far, I adjust my head back to the left. Then my gaze scrutinises the painting again and for the first few seconds, I don't see what he's talking about. So, I squint my eyes as a last resort.
"Oh, shit! There it is."
"Told you."
"Huh," I murmur thoughtfully and stand up straight again. "Suddenly this painting isn't as shit as it was before."
"It's still shit though," he says bluntly, and I purse my lips to hold in my laughter just in case another middle-aged woman decides to look at me as if I don't belong here. "I don't get art."
Silently, I nod my head to gesture to him that I agree with his standpoint.
"By the way, where's Kai?" he asks, looking around for him. "Is he not with you?"
"Why would he be with me?"
Furrowing his eyebrows in confusion, slowly explains, "Because you're dating."
My eyes grow awkwardly large and I avert my gaze at his words. My lips part to say something to him regarding his statement, but my words get stuck somewhere in my throat and when no sound escapes my mouth, I resort to pursing my lips shut. My hand then comes up to scratch at the invisible itch on the nape of my neck. Feeling his questioning gaze piercing through me, I hesitantly glance back at him to see the look I was imagining he'd be wearing blatantly painting his facial expression.
He tilts his head to the side inquisitively too, causing his dreadlocks to flop over to the side. Demandingly, he questions, "What was that reaction?"
"What reaction?"
"That reaction." He waves his hand to gesture at the entirety of my face, and it takes everything in me not to appear amused. "What was that?"
Stutteringly, I inform him, "Uh, well, Kai and I… we broke up."
"What?" he exclaims in shock and everyone around us turns to look in our direction.
Subtly, I wave a hand to quieten his voice lest we get kicked out of the gallery.
While whispering loudly, he asks, "What do you mean you guys broke up? Why would you break up with him? You guys were supposed to be… you know, endgame. My hope that love still exists."
"Yeah, well…"
"There's no way you guys broke up. You're lying."
Again, my eyes waver from his gaze.
His eyes flicker around my face to try and figure out if I am indeed lying, but I remain neutral. Taking my silence as confirmation that I'm not lying, his face drops in disbelief and I feel bad when he looks at me like I just kicked a puppy.
"When did this happen?"
"A while ago."
"Okay, but why didn't Kai tell me? Why didn't you tell me? You're a founder in my stream but you don't even have the decency to tell me about what's going on in your life? I'm revoking your badge."
"You can't revoke my badge. I earned that shit."
"Fucking watch me."
"What's going on?" Kai interrupts our conversation and I glance over my shoulder to see him watching us in perplex while he holds two cups in both of his hands. "Why are you guys arguing in front of all these white people?"
"But why would you say that?" I question him, scoldingly while reaching out to grab the cup of coffee that he holds out for me. I'm guessing he either got himself a strawberry and cream frappuccino or some other kind of decaffeinated coffee.
Feigning innocence, he takes a sip of his drink to hide the visible grin on his lips and mumbles behind the cup, "What?"
"Why did you have to specify white people?"
"It's just an observation. There are a lot of white people here. By the way, don't tell Sabina I said this, but the paintings in here are absolute shite."
"I'm telling her you said that."
"But that would make you a snitch," he informs me and then his eyes darken slightly when he adds, "And you know what happens to snitches?"
"You're supposed to be a supportive friend; not standing here badmouthing her gallery. Sabina worked really hard to build this place from the ground up," I say, shaking my head in disappointment as if I wasn't saying the same thing a few seconds ago.
"All I'm saying is that she should have bought better art to display in here."
"Okay, what the fuck is going on?" Richard cuts in, now looking baffled. "Are you guys not broken up then?"
"What the fuck kind of question is that?" Kai scowls at his friend in confusion while I'm standing on the sidelines, having a hard time hiding my amused grin. I use the cup of coffee to aid me.
"Seong Jin just told me that you guys broke up," he responds, glaring at me accusingly.
"Why are you going around telling people that we broke up?" my boyfriend muses with a look of betrayal, nudging me in my side almost scoldingly.
"It was just a joke. I wanted to see if he'd actually believe me," I clarify to him with a peel of laughter in my eyes and then I turn to Richard and jokingly muse, "I got you good, didn't I?"
"It won't be a joke when I actually break up with you," Kai threatens with a slight scowl turning the corners of his lips downward.
"Shut up, no you won't."
"Yeah, you better not," Richard says and when my eyes meet his, I sense a desperate pleading in them. "With the strained relationship between my aunt and uncle, I don't think I can stand to see another relationship fall apart."
Kai stands behind me and possessively winds his arm around my waist, resting his chin in the crook of my neck. With his hair inevitably tickling me, I snort quietly and try to push his head off my shoulder. His hold is unrelenting though. With a large smile tugging on his lips, his teeth out and dimples appearing on his cheeks, he resumes teasingly rubbing his hair against my neck and the side of my face, evoking a laugh out of me as I playfully shove his face away. The kiss he plants in the palm of my hand lingers afterwards.
His love language truly is physical touch. It took me a while to learn that he needs his fix every day and I, to this day, have to train my body to get accustomed to the feeling of these sorts of innocent touches from him.
"How is your aunt, by the way?" he asks Richard, his interest piqued by his previous statement about the strained relationship. "Last I heard, she was on the verge of filing for divorce."
"I'd say she's still on that verge. I guess she's holding out on the hope that the relationship might fix itself. I'd prefer they just separate and get it all over and done with. Spending time with them and the lingering tension is gonna give me an aneurysm one of these days."
Then he inaudibly mumbles something about going to look for Sabina before tapping Kai on the shoulder and nodding goodbye. As Richard walks away from us, I can't help but think about his words and the probability of my relationship with Kai ever turning that sour in the future. The thought makes me sad.
I tilt my head slightly to look at him, trying not to portray the concern in my eyes.
He notices almost in no time and whispers intimately, "What's wrong?"
"If you ever had a problem with me or our relationship, do you promise that you'll tell me and not let it fester in silence?"
"When have I ever not been vocal about it when I have a problem with you?" he muses jokingly, flicking the bud of my nose.
"I'm being serious."
The earnest look in my eyes tames the jesting mood he's in and after turning me around to stand toe to toe with him, his hand comes up to squeeze comfort into my arm. My gaze flickers down to his hand and then back up to connect with his blue-brown eyes. They radiate reassurance. His lips curl upwards with a soft smile.
"I promise." Then his hand travels down my arm and he hooks his pinkie with mine.
My lips twitch to mirror the smile on his face. The silent gesture is like him saying that he pinkie promises. He knows how much pinkie promises mean to me.