A new post from in "Introverts Life Guide," from the owner "The extrovert introvert":
[ If I knew what the future holds for me, I wouldn't do things that make me regret!
I do not even have that kind of power. Yet, I promised myself that I would never regret anything.
.
.
I was too full of myself and I'm regretting it!
I was wrong. I'm the problem.
I will atone by living better and I will live in a way that will not lead to regrets.
#introvert #regret #wrong 2015/06/15 ]
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The scary secretary went back and left me beside that horrifying door. Now that I was alone, the door looked even more detailed. I gathered my coverage and knocked on the door.
No answer.
After a few seconds, I knocked again!
Yet, no answer, so I opened the door.
"Hello, Chairman King!" I entered and greeted the Chairman, only to see him focused on his monitor. Not a single reaction or sign of welcoming me or even hearing me. Neither had anything changed in the dead look in his eyes.
The thought struck me, 'Is he dead?', as I ran to him. My mind was emptier than ever, yet my body remembered the basics as I called the ambulance and examined his body, answering the nurse.
No pulse, a cold body. All pointing to the fact that he had been dead for hours. Meaning it had been a while since he had left behind this world, still looking at a family picture that made my heart go numb!
I wish the world could be less advanced. I wish I had never seen someone's last wishes. Someone's love and regrets for their family. Someone's memories, their past...
" I'm begging you, come with me to my father? I know that you have no feelings for me and don't even think of me as a friend, but after this many years, after all, we went through together. Is it too much of a favor to ask? He wants to see the one I like before dying..." Theodore's voice rang in my ears as I fled out of the now-crowded room.
I knew he lied that day, but he didn't lie entirely. His father was dying, and he wanted him to love someone. Even if he knew Theodor, the son he raised was an emotionally handicapped psychopath.
The chairman is dead now...
The room filled with the freezing air of death.
Dialing the number with shaking hands, I fell, leaning on the cold corridor walls.
"When, ha, I, ha, ha, he, I, arrived, he.."I couldn't breathe.
What was with me? It wasn't even like the Chairman was the only dead person I had seen. He is just another dead person, even if he is my only friend's father.
'I am a doctor and a surgeon. I have seen more dead than an average human being.'
Grandfather's voice came through my tightly held cell phone and entered my ear.
However, it took a long time for my now chaotic brain to analyze his words. I heard them but as if he was talking in another language. One other than the many I had learned to gain love. I couldn't understand a word.
"The world is going to an end... Human sins are going to devour this planet like many before... Nowhere to run! No way to survive... Eternal suffering awaits you!"
A language that felt more familiar than my mother language and a voice like breaking glasses, yet more innocent than a newborn child, entered my ears. A piercing voice that sends shivers down my spine.
"Dawn! Talk like a human. I can't understand! Who is he? He what?" Grandfather's shouting voice finally made sense, and for the first time, it sounded so pleasing to my ears that I teared up!
Like seeing a ray of light in the middle of darkness or discovering a familiar face in a crowd filled with strangers.
"Chairman King... Pant... was dead in his office...," I answered, feeling my face getting wet.
"Where are you now?" he said with a shaking voice after a long silence.
" His office, the long corridor I'm sitting under a painting. The one that people are drowning.. the one with sinful humans.."
"Beeb"
And he ended the call after hearing my crazy gibberish. I know it's crazy, but the people were alive, yet dying. It was a picture of doom. I could feel it.
The itching urge to shout and alarm everyone to ran away. The monsters' horrifying cruel presence. Fire and dusted buildings at this very point in the world. A cold world. One freezing, dying earth that's burning.
My life has always been like this. I could feel what I didn't want to and couldn't even hear what I wanted to. How stupid of me not to see the signs...
"The cold half raw forgotten eggs, the unwelcoming secretary, my lonely graduation party, the last name..."
My head was about to explode. The screams and prys for help were like thousands of fingernails scraping at the wall of my soul with back shivering sounds and ear bleeding loudness. It all made me want to throw up my life.
Should I just give in here or should I wait a bit and go crazy in front of the madhouse with great air and scenery? Unlike what any sane person does in a situation like this, I held in my breath.
It seemed like I had lost my mind again, like when I was younger. When I heard and saw things, things that I never told my parents a second time as they would make my parents disappointed and angry. Like when I didn't know how to make them go away. The time that I suffered, the hell in my mind. The time, that I found a solution to make them silent and invincible.
Let's begin with when I was standing behind the door.
"knock, knock, knock", I don't know if it was the carvings or the wood type but it was the most painful knocking of my life. I will do what Mr. Kim did. I will wait 30 seconds.
'1, 2,3...,29,30' When my mental counting hit 30 seconds, I push down the door handle and open the door.