Xie Lian had planned to show off his culinary skills, but after this evening's events, his confidence had risen and plunged in equal measure. Hua Cheng suggested he make dinner instead, but how could Xie Lian have the face to ask him to cook after Hua Cheng had already fixed his door and cleaned his shrine? Who in their right mind would treat their guest this way, and furthermore, who did he take an esteemed Supreme Ghost King for?
Fortunately, he'd brought plenty of supplies back from town. While a large portion had gone into Xie Lian's pot, some buns and pies still remained, as well as fruits and vegetables, so they munched on what they had. But after those were eaten, what then?
The next day, the problem was solved on its own. Bright and early in the morning, the door of Puqi Shrine rattled with the knocking of a gaggle of village girls who had come offering several large pots of congee and a roasted chicken. The village girls were shy and nervous, so who they'd really come to see was quite obvious.
Xie Lian couldn't help but sigh in awe as he thought, Beauty really can fill a stomach.
The roasted chicken was divided between the two children; Xie Lian only had some congee while Hua Cheng didn't touch a thing.
"Gege is quite popular around here," Hua Cheng commented with a smile.
"Don't tease me, San Lang," Xie Lian laughed. "They were obviously drunk, but not on wine."
After Qi Rong took the contents of that bowl down his throat yesterday, he suffered and struggled outside the shrine the entire night, wailing nonstop and yelling things along the lines of: "I'd rather be captured by Lang Qianqiu and butchered into a million pieces than be stuck here and fed your poison!"
"Cousin Crown Prince, I was wrong. Please, I beg you, give me the antidote!"
As the night went on, it seemed that he eventually started hallucinating and became delusional; little Guzi was horrified as he listened. By early morning, Qi Rong was shriveled and drained, his face completely ashen. Only after he slurped a bit of congee from Guzi's cupped palm did he finally regain some strength.
"Popular, my ass! Who the hell would come for him?!" he croaked with a broken voice. "Look at that shabby appearance! And don't you be so full of yourself, Hua Cheng, you fucker. At most you could only attract bumpkin chicks from backwater towns like these. They only came simpering along because you're dressed so extravagantly. If you dressed the part of a beggar, I doubt they'd spare you a glance!"
Xie Lian thought that wasn't right at all; even if Hua Cheng dressed like a pauper, he would surely collect a mountain of gold should he go begging. Still, he said nothing and started leisurely doing chores. After a while, another wave of smells wafted outside, and Qi Rong roared out curses anew.
"What are you doing now?! What the hell!"
"It's that pot of 'Love for All Seasons' stew," Xie Lian replied warmly. "I'm heating it up."
Hua Cheng applauded quietly at this. "What a good name."
Qi Rong screeched, "YOU GAVE THAT FUCKING SHIT A NAME?! STOP!"
The mere smell of the reheating brew made Qi Rong recall memories most terrifying, so there wasn't really a need to feed him; Qi Rong didn't dare speak another word. Once the meal was finished, Lang Ying silently collected the cutlery, seeming like he intended to do the dishes.
"Let it be," Xie Lian chided him, "Just go play. I can take care of this."
Maybe he wasn't allowed to cook, but he could still do dishes. Hua Cheng watched Lang Ying take Guzi outside.
"Let me do that for you," Hua Cheng said.
Xie Lian declined the offer. "There's even less reason for you to trouble yourself. Just sit."
As he spoke, they heard a ruckus outside. Qi Rong had gotten bored with nothing to do after filling his stomach, and he'd started catcalling.
"Hey chickee, what're you doin', checking me out?" Qi Rong cooed greasily. "Did I make your tender little heart quiver?"
He'd just been griping about how he didn't care for country girls, only to turn around and start flirting—and so tastelessly too! Xie Lian shook his head, thinking it would be best to drag Qi Rong inside after all, lest he scare people while tied up out there.
Before he even opened the door, he heard awed comments from the villagers.
"Whoa, what legendary beauties!"
"Why would such beautiful girls come to our village…?"
"I've never seen such pretty ladies, not in my whole life! And there's two of them!"
Soon after, there was the sound of knocking, and it surprisingly came upon the door of Puqi Shrine. Xie Lian was puzzled.
Legendary beauties? Two of them? Why would two legendary beauties come knocking on my door? Xie Lian then realized, Ah, could it be —did that wealthy merchant get some new wives and bring them to show their gratitude?
Thinking that this could very well be the case, Xie Lian quickly grabbed for the "Please donate to help with renovations of this shrine" sign, ready to set it outside. But he then heard one of the women speak in a frosty tone.
"What's this thing at the door? What an eyesore."
Immediately the puzzled voice of another woman followed. "Maybe it's for guarding the door? No way. No one would ever have a reason to sink so low, to use such a vulgar spiritual beast…"
Although they were women's voices, Xie Lian had heard them before. It was Wind Master Qingxuan and Earth Master Yi!
At first, he wanted to open the door. Then he whipped his head around to look at Hua Cheng, who was languidly cleaning up the altar table behind him. Xie Lian stopped his hands, cautiously peeking out the door's crack instead.
Outside the door stood two tall, slender women. One was a white-robed Daoist priestess with a whisk in hand, her lips rosy, her eyes bright, her form sensually graceful. The other was a woman clad in black, her skin snow white and her face beautifully sharp. She wore an upset expression as she glowered into the distance, her hands folded behind her back. The white-robed Daoist priestess had a face full of smiles, cupping her hands to salute her thanks to all around.
"Ha ha, thanks, everyone, thank you! No need to compliment us so much, no need to make such a scene! It gets me all flustered when you fuss over me! That's enough now, thank you, ha ha…"
Xie Lian had no words. "…"
A large, tightly packed crowd of beauty-watching villagers was outside, and once they were done looking at the beauties, they started pointing and jeering at Qi Rong, to the latter's great displeasure.
"WHAT ARE YOU ALL LOOKIN' AT?!" he screamed maniacally.
"So what if this ancestor likes lying on the ground?! FUCK OFF! There's nothin' to see here!"
When the villagers saw how bizarrely the man behaved—how fiendish he looked with that sickly green face—they dispersed in a fright.
Shi Qingxuan looked Qi Rong over.
"This…green gongzi, pray tell, is His Highness the Crown Prince inside the shrine?"
Hearing her address Xie Lian as "His Highness the Crown Prince," Qi Rong immediately lost interest in the two beautiful women before him. He clicked his tongue.
"Tsk! So you're some goddamn officials from the Upper Court! As if this ancestor is a dog guarding his door. Listen here, I am…"
He hadn't finished his introduction before Ming Yi glumly approached. There was a wail, followed by sounds of smacking. From Xie Lian's position, he couldn't discern exactly what Ming Yi was doing and could only see Shi Qingxuan sweep her whisk as she chided her companion.
"Ming-xiong, it's not good to use violence!"
"What's there to be afraid of?" Ming Yi asked coolly. "Didn't he say he's not a domesticated spiritual beast?"
"…"
To prevent Qi Rong from getting beaten to death, Xie Lian had no choice but to open the door. He raised his hands to stop Ming Yi.
"My Lord! Have mercy! Don't hit him, he's a person!"
When Xie Lian opened the door, Ming Yi flipped away her black hem and removed her boot from Qi Rong's back. Shi Qingxuan cupped her hands in courtesy.
"Your Highness, I've come a few days early! What's with this person? He's so full of ghost qi that it's impossible to hide; do you take us for blind?" Shi Qingxuan changed the subject. "Anyway, let's talk inside. I've something really important I need your help with…"
She made her way around Qi Rong's prone body as she spoke and was about to cross over the threshold—but Hua Cheng was still inside! How could Xie Lian possibly let them in?
"Wait!" he cried hastily.
However, it was too late. Puqi Shrine was only so big, and it had no places to hide. Shi Qingxuan and Ming Yi immediately saw that behind Xie Lian there stood a Supreme Ghost King, who was in the middle of doing dishes. Four pairs of eyes met; sparks flew. Hua Cheng smiled a smile that showed his teeth. The smile was ominous, and his eyes held no trace of mirth.
In an instant, Ming Yi's pupils shrank, and she backed a meter away. Exceedingly alarmed, Shi Qingxuan flung out her Wind Master fan to strike an attacking stance.
"Crimson Rain Sought Flower!"
Outside the door, the ashen-faced Qi Rong roared with rage. "AND I'M THE NIGHT-TOURING GREEN LANTERN! How come none of you recognized me when kicking the shit out of me, but you knew it was him with just one look?!"
Ming Yi had infiltrated Ghost City and spent many years as a spy under Hua Cheng. Only recently had she been discovered and captured, and subsequently locked in a labyrinthine dungeon and beaten to a pulp. Now the two enemies faced each other once more, their eyes bloodshot. Tiny little Puqi Shrine was filled with the scent of venom inside and out. Hua Cheng lightly tossed the rag in his hand and smirked.
"Lord Earth Master looks lively."
"And Lord Ghost King looks leisurely as always," Ming Yi replied coldly.
After exchanging these false perfunctory greetings, the next words that came out of Hua Cheng's mouth were even colder, and his expression turned positively glacial.
"Leave," he warned. "I don't care what 'important' business you have. Do not come anywhere near here again."
Although Ming Yi feared Hua Cheng, she refused to back down without a fight. She responded, her tone gravely serious, "Coming here was not my will!"
The venom was turning explosive, and Xie Lian grew nervous next to them.
"Wh-wh-what…? Lord Wind Master, what should we do?"
Shi Qingxuan knocked her fan on her head a few times. "I didn't expect Crimson Rain Sought Flower to be here!" she sighed. "Didn't you guys just meet up recently? How come you're palling around again so soon? Anyway, it'd be great if this could be solved without throwing fists. Violence is bad. If they start fighting, we'll have to hold them back."
Xie Lian replied, "I agree, mostly."
Qi Rong had been listening intently, as he was hoping the pair would start brawling. When he heard this, he suddenly spoke up. "Ohhh… So you're that tramp Wind Master?!"
Both Xie Lian and Shi Qingxuan turned to look at him. That was exactly how Qi Rong had referred to Shi Qingxuan when he was lounging in his cave, but he'd dared address her like that even in front of the lady herself! Xie Lian couldn't decide whether it stemmed from an excess of bravery or a deficit of intelligence.
Shi Qingxuan had always been raised in dignified grace, so this was probably the first time she'd ever heard such an insult. She blinked, looking confused, then turned to Xie Lian.
"Your Highness, please wait."
Then she exited the shrine and closed the door. Outside, there was a shriek from Qi Rong and another bout of smacking noises. A moment later, Shi Qingxuan opened the door to come back in; he had returned to his male form.
"All right, where were we? I'm feeling kind of hungry, so how about we all sit down and eat something?" he declared. "There's nothing that can't be negotiated and nothing that can't be solved at the dinner table."
"…"
Xie Lian didn't want anyone to start fighting inside Puqi Shrine, but Hua Cheng seemed extremely angry over the matter of Ming Yi's infiltration. Without knowing the inside story, it seemed rather impossible to have them sit down and share a peaceful meal. However, Hua Cheng actually didn't seem to object to the idea. After a long moment, the frost in his expression cleared, and he turned to continue doing dishes. Once he finished, he walked to the pot and ladled a full bowl of that Love for All Seasons stew.
As he withdrew and thereby put a stop to the imminent battle, the rest sighed a breath of relief. The next step was to change the subject and liven the mood.
So, Shi Qingxuan asked, "Your Highness, what's in that pot? It seems to still be hot."
"Oh. I made that," Xie Lian said.
The pot had been stewing for a long time; the flavors were completely soaked in and most of the smell had dissipated. Although the
color was questionable, the shapes had all but melted away, and it looked so much better than it had the night before.
Shi Qingxuan vibrated with excitement when he heard this reply.
"Really? I've never eaten anything prepared by the hands of a heavenly official! Come, come, come, let's have a taste."
He grabbed some spoons and filled two bowls. Xie Lian wanted to stop him, to be honest. But Hua Cheng had been so consistently encouraging, burying seeds of confidence within him. Also, earlier that morning as he heated the stew, he'd changed the preparation according to Hua Cheng's suggestions. A thought surfaced in his mind, Perhaps I saved it.
After some hesitation, he decided not to say anything. He watched with secret anticipation as Shi Qingxuan passed one of the bowls to Ming Yi.
"Come, Ming-xiong. This one's yours."
Ming Yi took a look at the contents of the bowl, then turned her face away, looking wholly unwilling. It was a little rude. Shi Qingxuan was outraged and unrelentingly forced the bowl in her face.
"Eat! Didn't you say you were hungry on the road earlier?!"
Hua Cheng lazily raised a spoonful and blew on it. He brought it to his lips, then swallowed and smiled at Xie Lian.
"It's definitely milder today. The flavor's just right."
Xie Lian smiled too. "Really? I added more water today."
Hua Cheng took another bite and beamed. "Gege did his best."
Hua Cheng behaved as though he were tasting some delicious delicacy, and he was incredibly convincing to behold. A moment later, Ming Yi took the bowl after all. Shi Qingxuan smiled.
"That's better!"
The pair spooned mouthfuls of the stew at the same time and swallowed them down.