10th day, 1st month, 1,547th year, Continental Calendar — Royal Capital Parnam
It was a day when the festive mood of the New Year was beginning to settle
down.
The fountain plaza in Parnam where the Jewel Voice Broadcast could be watched
was still packed with people. That new king was apparently going to be broadcasting
yet another new program, so the people had gathered to see it. At this point, it was a
familiar sight in pretty much any city where the Jewel Voice Broadcast could be
watched. The people would gather every time a new program was planned like this;
the merchants would come with their carts, and it would turn into a festival-like
atmosphere.
Dece, Juno, and their adventuring party were there in that festive fountain plaza.
"Wow, it's as crowded as ever," Juno commented. "That's the capital for you."
That was the opinion the baby-faced, slender, female thief let slip out as she was
overwhelmed by all the people passing by. With the protection quest they had taken
from the guild complete, the party had decided to come see the Jewel Voice
Broadcast, since they were already in the area anyway.
The brawny brawler Augus was dragging the affable young priest Febral around
from stall to stall, so the only ones here were Juno, the hot-blooded and handsome
swordsman Dece, and the quiet, shapely mage Julia.
"These broadcast programs have already become one of the famous sights of this
country, after all," Dece told her. "The music programs are the best, you know. The
loreleis are cute, and when I consider the possibility of not being able to hear their
voices anymore, even though I'm an adventurer, I don't feel like I want to go to other
countries any— Ow!"
Dece had been rambling on about the topic, but Julia pinched his upper arm with
a smile.
Seeing that her leader just didn't understand the female heart, Juno shrugged her
shoulders with dismay. She started thinking that maybe she should be considerate
and disappear off somewhere for their sake... but then it happened.
The broadcast seemed to have started, and the people were all looking towards
the fountain, but what was displayed there was... some sort of roly-poly creature? All
the people of the kingdom were taken aback by this, but Juno had the loudest
reaction of all.
"Huh?! What's Mister Musashibo doing on there?!"
Yes. What was there to hide? The one appearing on screen was not a snowman,
or a kagami mochi, it was Little Musashibo. Little Musashibo turned to the screen
and waved his arms around.
"Hey, everyone. I'm Little Musashibo. Nice to meet you."
"""He talked?!"""
Hearing Little Musashibo's adorable, child-like voice, Juno, Dece, and Julia all
cried out in surprise at the same time. Little Musashibo, who had never said a word
no matter how much trouble they'd gotten into on a quest, was now onscreen and
talking. You couldn't blame them for their surprise.
"That voice... it sounds like a child's, or a woman's. Was the person inside him
female all along?!" Dece cried out in shock, but Juno immediately denied it.
"Nah, I've seen his hand once before, and he was just a normal guy, you know?"
"But that's a girlish voice, isn't it?"
"It's a kigurumi suit, so why can't it just be a different person inside?" Julia
suggested, in a relaxed tone.
Dece and Juno gulped, seeing the logic behind the comment. ""...Y-Yeah, of course
that's it.""
They had forgotten because of how human its gestures were, but the person in
question was a kigurumi suit. It was possible the suit had just been loaned out by the
castle.
With no idea of the confusion it was causing for Juno and the others, the Little
Musashibo on the broadcast declared in a loud voice, "Okay, Together With Big Sis is
starting now."
◇ ◇ ◇
At the same time — Parnam Castle's Great Hall
Right now, Little Musashibo was dancing to an easygoing melody right in front of
our eyes. Liscia, who was standing beside me and watching this from a spot that
wouldn't appear on the broadcast, stood there with her mouth hanging open, a blank
expression on her face. There was an awkward silence between us.
"Um... Could you maybe say something?" I asked hesitantly.
"I don't even know where to start... No, I mean, what is that even supposed to
be?"
"Little Musashibo."
"Yeah. That, I know. That's not what I meant. Why is it talking?"
"Well, because there's a person inside it, of course," I said. "Pamille Carol is
providing the voice."
"Pamille's inside that thing?!"
Yes, as a matter of fact, she was. We'd had no equipment for recording, so we
couldn't add the voice in post-processing, which meant the voice had to come from
inside Little Musashibo. I was controlling his movements, so it wasn't too heavy for
Pamille, but she had still complained it was hot and stuffy inside there.
"You have that kigurumi suit registered as an adventurer, don't you?" Liscia
demanded. "Is it okay having it appear on the Jewel Voice Broadcast? Wouldn't it be
bad if people found out it was connected to the royal family?"
Ohhh, yeah, if Juno and the others were watching, that might turn into a bit of a
headache.
"Well, it's a kigurumi suit, after all," I said. "'We saw this kigurumi in town and
thought it was cute, so the castle asked for a copy, and now we're using it as a
character in our program.' ...Wouldn't a story like that work?"
"Even if it does..." she muttered. "And wait, what is this program even supposed
to be about?"
"What, you ask? It's an educational program."
"Educational?"
"Oh, look, the main program's about to begin," I said, pointing.
◇ ◇ ◇
The easygoing song ended, and the new scene to be broadcast was set on a stage.
Up on the stage there was a backdrop of trees, grass, and stumps to show that it
was a forest. In the middle of that sparse forest, Little Musashibo was drawing
something on the ground with chalk. Looking closer, it was apparently numbers.
"Um... 1+1 is 2, 2+2 is 4... Hrm, this arithmetic stuff is hard."
Little Musashibo twisted his head around in confusion. The gesture was very
childish.
An older girl with blue hair wearing a boyish outfit including a hat and overalls
passed by. When the blue haired girl noticed Little Musashibo, she called out to him
in a cheerful voice.
"Hey, what's wrong, Little Musashibo? Why the troubled look on your
(expressionless) face?"
Little Musashibo looked up, walking over to the girl with slow, easy footsteps.
"Hello, Big Sister Juna."
At that point, the adult viewers noticed what was up. The big sister character was
the famous Prima Lorelei, Juna Doma.
Because Juna was mostly known for being so beautiful that even the girls wanted
her, they hadn't made the connection with her in this boyish outfit. Her tone of voice
was more direct, in keeping with the outfit. While this version of Juna had lost the
mature sexiness that made her seem older than she actually was, it brought out a
cuteness that was more like what you'd expect of a girl her age.
Little Musashibo turned to "Big Sister Juna" for help. "Big Sister Juna, arithmetic
is hard and I don't know what to do about it. I look at books, but there are just
numbers and symbols, and it's not interesting at all."
There were a large number of viewers who nodded in agreement.
It had been nine days earlier that Souma had encouraged the people to learn to
read, write, and do arithmetic, but those who lived a lifestyle where they didn't need
to do calculations had apparently thought, "Okay, reading and writing, maybe, but
what good is learning to do calculations for anyone who isn't a merchant?"
However, Juna giggled and gave a playful wink to Little Musashibo who was
voicing those viewers' opinions for them. "Oh my, don't you know that math can be
fun?"
"What? Really?" Little Musashibo asked doubtfully.
"It's true," she said with great confidence.
A fun, cheery melody began to play again from seemingly nowhere in particular.
Juna began singing along with it.
The song was "Fun Arithmetic." It was from Minna no Uta, or Songs for Everyone,
in the world Souma came from. This song, which was sung by Seiji Tanaka,
presented addition; subtraction; the fact that when you have a group of ten it moves
up to a new digit; and the fact that any number, no matter how large, disappears
when multiplied by zero; all in a comical fashion.
Juna and Little Musashibo sang this song, dancing happily in a circle together.
When they finished, Little Musashibo excitedly clapped his hands. "I feel like
arithmetic just got fun. If I study, will it be even more fun?"
"Of course," Juna assured him. "If you study hard, you'll be able to do even more
amazing things."
Then Juna sang a song for Little Musashibo about all the things he'd be able to do
if he studied his arithmetic. It had a fun melody and playful lyrics, but if you were
listening closely, it expressed a number of mathematical phenomena. It was exactly
the sort of song that belonged on an educational program.
The children who were watching the broadcast innocently imitated Juna and
Little Musashibo, singing the lyrics to themselves and dancing. The adults, on the
other hand, considered the meaning of the lyrics, nodding along with interest as they
figured it out.
In among them there was just one person, Juno, who was thinking about
something entirely different.
Did he just lend them his kigurumi suit? No... That can't be it. Juno was closely
scrutinizing Little Musashibo's movements. The way he moves, it's just like Mr. Little
Musashibo. But the voice I heard was a cute girl's voice. The hand I saw that time was a
man's hand. There's a different person inside, but he's moving the same... What does it
mean?
As she pondered deeply, something occurred to Juno.
Now that I think about it, wasn't there that one time I saw Mr. Little Musashibo
delivering a letter to the guild? After the receptionist saw it, she told us there was a
banquet being held at the castle. In other words, that letter was from the castle. This
broadcast is put together by the castle, too, from what I hear. Maybe Mr. Little
Musashibo is connected to the castle somehow?
Juno stared hard in the direction of Parnam Castle which was where the
broadcast was coming from.
...I'm curious. I want to look into it, but... I can't exactly go sneaking into the castle.
If they caught me, I'm sure I'd be punished. Hmm, isn't there any way I can look into it?
While Juno was thinking about all of this, the program continued. When Little
Musashibo and Juna's short theater segment came to an end, the broadcast video
moved to another place.
This time it wasn't a stage but what looked like a great hall. There were around
ten three-to-five-year-old children there. Owing to their young age, they weren't
coordinated at all, and they would sit down, run around, lie down, and generally
move about freely. These were the children of the castle's workers who had been left
at the daycare center.
Souma had thought the audience for an educational program should be made up
of children, so, with the permission of their parents (though, with the king asking
them a favor, they could hardly decline...), he had arranged for them to appear. Also,
in with the children there was a young girl who looked to be around sixteen years
old.
"Hey, isn't that Princess Roroa?" one astute viewer pointed out.
That girl was indeed Roroa, the former Princess of Amidonia. Roroa was wearing
a boyish outfit like Juna's, and said in a cheerful voice, "Look, everybooody. Your
singin' big sister is gonna come out and plaaaay. One, two, aaaand...!"
"""Big Sister Juna!""" the children called.
With Roroa giving them the signal, the children all called her name together.
When they did...
"Helloooo." Juna appeared again, waving her hands. She stood next to Roroa and
said, "Now, everyone, it's time for a song."
Then she began to clap her hands.
◇ ◇ ◇
Meanwhile, back where we were recording in the castle, Liscia was crying out in
surprise.
"Roroa?! What is that girl doing?!"
"When I told Roroa we would be making an educational program, she said,
'Sounds fascinatin'! Darlin', I wanna be on it, too!'" I said. "She forced me to do it. I
had no other options, so I decided to let her be on the show as Juna's assistant."
"Can you really go around deciding roles on a whim like that?" Liscia asked
skeptically.
"...I have a soft spot where crying children or the sponsors are concerned, you
know. Besides, this program is being brought to you by The Silver Deer, which
Sebastian is the public face of; but Roroa runs it behind the scenes, after all."
Right now, our country was providing funding for multiple businesses and for
research on a variety of topics. We were heavily focused on foodstuffs, medicine, and
the military because those were things that would have an effect on the lives of the
people. Thanks to that, the national treasury was always on the verge of collapse.
Eventually, as the population grew, the increase in taxes would make back our
money on the investment, but we couldn't count on it to happen right away.
With that in mind, the finance minister, Colbert, kept a tight hold of the country's
purse strings, and he wasn't about to allocate funds for some new program that had
no record of success. That's why I had asked Roroa's company to fund it. Because of
that, I was now left with no choice but to listen to Roroa, the investor, when she
asked me for something.
When Liscia heard the details, she sighed. "It's always about money, huh. It's a
hard life."
"You said it."
...Though I'm sure Roroa set up her own company with this exact sort of situation in
mind.
The truth of the matter was, if Roroa hadn't invested, I wouldn't have been able
to do this broadcast. Besides, if I didn't let her have a little of what she wanted, I was
probably going to be hit with divine retribution someday.
I looked over to the hall where Juna and Roroa were singing "Musunde Hiraite"
with the children.
The children watched Roroa's exaggerated movements and then imitated her.
When I saw them bouncing around, moving their arms and legs, it put a smile on my
face. While my heart was being warmed by their angelic behavior, Liscia asked me a
question.
"I understand why you want to make an educational program, but why are there
so many songs?"
"Don't you have songs from your childhood that have stuck with you for a
strangely long time?" I asked.
"Like lullabies?"
"Yeah, exactly. Songs and melodies get stuck in your head, and it's easy for people
to end up singing or humming them on their own. That's why it's more memorable if
you use songs in education than if you just taught the material normally, and it'll
spread farther, too."
For instance, before they taught us "Irohanihoheto" in school, I'd already learned
it from Minna no Uta's "Iroha Matsuri." Also, I feel like a major part of the reason I
could remember the ordering of the Chinese zodiac without getting it confused was
because I'd learned a song called "Eto wa Merry-go-Round." If I still remembered
those songs even now that I was an adult, Minna no Uta really was incredible.
Liscia said, "I see..." with a grunt of admiration. "Honestly, I think this was really
well thought out."
"Hm... Well, thinking is my job, after all."
"It's not as easy as you make it sound. Thinking about the people and coming up
with policies to benefit them." Liscia was looking at me approvingly... I averted my
eyes. "Wait, why did you look away?"
"Well... If you were to ask if it's really for the people, I'd have to admit a bit of my
own self-interest came into it, too..."
"Really? How?" Liscia stared hard at me.
...Well, there's no helping it, I thought. I guess I'll fess up.
"We're holding the wedding ceremony as I formally inherit the throne, right?" I
asked.
"Y-Yes, I suppose we are."
Liscia's cheeks flushed red when I said the word wedding. It had been just the
other night, on New Year's Eve, that I had proposed to Liscia and she had accepted,
and it was still a little embarrassing to think about it. It was adorable when she did
that, but... let's move the story along.
"So, at the wedding, I want to reveal all of my queens, with no discrimination
between who's a primary and who's a secondary."
Because secondary queens, whose children would lack the right of succession,
had originally been the kings' concubines, they were seen as lower than the primary
queens. As a result, even now that they were treated as queens, there were many
cases where they would not be given a big wedding ceremony in front of the people.
There had even been cases when secondary queens had felt inferior to the
primaries, and so had declined to attend on that basis. They must have feared it
would be a seed of later troubles.
I wanted to change that custom.
"Roroa said she was fine with being a secondary queen, but since we are going to
be ruling over the Amidonia Region, I want to make her my third primary queen," I
said. "That would make Juna the only one who can't participate in the ceremony,
right? I was thinking, if possible, I'd like everyone to be there together."
"You're right. I think that would be for the best." Liscia nodded and agreed
without hesitation. "Aisha and Juna were with us during the hard times, and we got
through them together. They feel like war buddies to me. Oh, I don't mean to leave
Roroa out. I think she can be a nuisance sometimes, but the way she'll play around
with me like a little sister is cute. It's just that Aisha and Juna are special. It doesn't
matter who's a primary and who's a secondary; I don't want anyone to feel
neglected."
"I see... I'm relieved."
It was a good thing the first primary queen, Liscia, was so tolerant. Liscia and the
others got along well, so I hadn't been worried, but... even so, it was a relief to hear
Liscia herself say all of that. Honestly, these wonderful girls were all better than I
deserved.
Liscia tilted her head to the side. "But does that have anything to do with this
broadcast?"
"Yeah," I said. "For now, my betrothal to Juna is secret, but that's going to become
untenable as the ceremony gets closer, right?"
"Well, of course. The wedding will be broadcast nationwide."
"Yep. So, there needs to be an announcement made at some point... I was
thinking, when that happens, between the lorelei Juna and the Juna who sings songs
with children, which would the people be less upset about... you know..."
Liscia narrowed her eyes and gave me a hard look. "Don't tell me you planned
this program just for that. Did you?"
"Oh, no. The plan itself was meant from the beginning to help educate the
people," I said, trying not to make eye contact. "It's just, well... I let my own selfish
interests get involved a bit, too, you could say..."
Liscia let out a sigh. "You're hopeless. Do you really have to worry that much
about how the people see you?"
"No, no, it's a pretty critical issue, you know?!"
After all, Juna had become such a national idol that we had gotten petitions from
the Congress of the People saying, "Have her on the Jewel Voice Broadcast more
often." If I just announced our engagement the way things were, there seriously
might be riots. That was why, in order to keep them under control, I was planning to
gradually shift Juna from idol work to children's songs.
When I told Juna that, as much as it pained me to do it, she said, "If I can sing at
your side, sire, I don't care what position it is in," and smiled for me.
Judging by the fact she had then immediately recommended a new lorelei,
Komari Corda, who could carry on her current style, Juna was enthusiastic about the
idea.
And, as we were discussing that, the part where they sang with the children had
come to an end.
"All right, everyone, well done," Juna said.
"And did all of ya out there watchin' us manage to sing along, too?" Roroa asked.
Juna and Roroa were closing out the segment.
"What's scheduled after this?" Liscia asked quietly.
"Next up is exercise time. It's a program to get everyone's bodies moving."
"Exercise? Since so far you've only been using family members... Is Aisha doing
it?"
"No. I've brought on a proper expert for the exercise segment."
"An expert?" Liscia was tilting her head to the side in confusion.
Roroa in the hall took the lead again. "Okay, it's time for exercisin'. We're all
gonna call the exercise guy together. One, two, aaaand...!"
"""Exercise guuuuuy!""" the children all shouted together at Roroa's prompting.
"Hahhhh!" A man jumped down from the balcony on the second floor. The man
landed stylishly in front of the children, flashed his bright white teeth, then turned
towards the screen and gave the viewers a thumbs-up.
The young human man was tall, standing at around 185 centimeters. He had a
muscular physique that was apparent even with all of his clothes on. His face, taken
as a whole, would have been considered handsome, but his thick, upturned
eyebrows, his sharp eyes, and his shining white teeth... Each of the individual parts
had a lot of "character."
The young man put a hand on his hip, then turned to the children and said, "Sorry
for the wait, children! Now, move your bodies with me!"
He was a young man who spoke passionate words with a passionate smile.
Liscia watched the young man, her mouth agape, and whispered, "...Who is that?"
◇ ◇ ◇
Earlier, in the middle of the 12th month, 1,546th year, Continental Calendar.
On that especially cold day...
"We've changed the way we produce grain in our territory. It's greatly increased
our food self-sufficiency rate," the man told me. "Thanks to your transportation
network, sire, my domain is more prosperous than ever."
"Oh, ho," I said. "I see..."
I was standing next to a burly, middle-aged man and smiling along as he rambled
on endlessly. The man's name was Moltov Juniro. He was the head of one of the ten
most influential noble houses in the country, the House of Juniro. Today I had been
invited to a banquet they were hosting.
These days, I was being invited to a banquet held by some influential noble or
other nearly every day. It seemed that in this country, in the middle and towards the
end of the twelfth month, the nobles would invite guests they were close to and hold
a banquet. There they would thank them for their interactions throughout the year,
and express their hope to remain just as close in the next one.
Well, basically, it was an end-of-year party.
In addition, it seemed that the number and level of the guests they could attract
was used as a barometer of the noble's power and influence. That was why, at this
time of year, the nobles invited as many people as they could, especially those of
high stature.
Now, if you asked who the person of highest stature in this country was, that
would have to be me, the guy who was currently holding on to the throne. Naturally,
even if they wanted to, no ordinary noble could invite the king without having any
special ties to him. I wasn't overly fond of these banquets myself, after all. Normally,
even if I received an invitation, I turned it down because I was busy.
So if I still had to attend someone's banquet, that meant they were no ordinary
noble. While they might not be on the level of Excel, there were still powerful nobles
in this country. It was difficult to turn down invitations from those sorts of people.
It's a superior's duty to socialize with those who serve under them.
Because I'd turned down so many of them, Hakuya had told me, "Please, at least
attend the year end banquets." Because of that, for the past few days in a row, I had
been forced to attend the powerful nobles' banquets.
While getting even more dressed up than usual for the banquet (It was a very
noble-y outfit. Even my sleeves had frills.), I would groan, "Ugh, what a pain," or, "I
don't wanna go," or, "This is such a hassle," and Liscia, who was helping me get
changed, would reproach me for it.
"This is your duty as king," she would say. "As your fiancées, we'll be there, too,
so shape up, would you?"
Like she'd said, Liscia and my other partners were in attendance, too. Even so,
they didn't have it as bad as I did. My fiancées, Juna excluded, were taking turns and
each accompanying me one at a time. I, on the other hand, was being forced to
attend every single time.
"As you can see, my domain is in excellent shape..." Moltov was droning.
"..."
If you asked what I didn't like about banquets, it was having to play along with
my host's "hospitality" which consisted of them going on at length about this or that.
Even if the food looked luxurious, I didn't have any time for eating or drinking. What
was more, the nobles all tended to talk about the same things.
First was boasting about how they managed their domain. That was no doubt
largely because I had added the management of their domains into their
performance evaluations. Most nobles tried to show there were no issues in their
governance, and the more capable ones took the chance to express exactly how
wonderful their managerial skills were.
The evaluations were done by inspectors dispatched for that express purpose,
and they would get proper input from the people living in the domain. That made
trying to convince me at a banquet all but meaningless, but it was human nature to
want to take every chance they could get. If they thought the king was keeping a
close eye on them, and it led to an improvement in their people's lives, that was a
good thing. Still, I got sick of having to hear similar accounts at every banquet.
"Sire, allow me to go get a drink for you," Aisha, my partner for the day, offered in
a small voice. The silver dress she'd also worn for the music program she'd helped
me host in Amidonia looked good on her now. She must have sensed my exhaustion
and was trying to be considerate.
I had just been feeling a bit parched, so I asked her to please do so, and Aisha
silently left.
The moment Aisha departed, there was a sudden change in the talkative Moltov's
demeanor.
"...By the way, sire."
His eyes were sharp, like a snake that had found its prey.
In that instant, I realized I had just screwed up. I'd been through this pattern a
number of times already. When the king's partner left his side, they saw that as their
moment of opportunity.
"Would you mind if we talked somewhere else for a little while?"
"...Aisha isn't back yet, you realize," I said.
"It won't take long. I'm sure the two of you will be able to meet back up in no
time."
Having said that, Moltov took my hand and half-dragged me away from there.
Yeah... This was definitely that pattern.
I don't like this... Moltov may think this is his big chance, but I feel like I'm on pins
and needles here...
While I was thinking that, as I had anticipated, there was a single young lady
waiting for me when we arrived at our destination. She was somewhere around
sixteen years old. She was clearly a lovely young lady of good upbringing.
"Allow me to introduce you, sire. This is my daughter, Siena."
"Greetings, Your Majesty. I am Siena Juniro," she said, curtsying.
...I knew it. They saw this as their opportunity to introduce me to young ladies
they were related to.
In every era, blood ties to the royal house had been a source of pride for the
nobility. If she became my queen, their house would be secure, and she might even
give birth to an heir. On top of that, because my betrothal to Juna hadn't been
announced yet, as far as they were concerned, I only had three fiancées. That
number was, with the exception of special cases like my predecessor, King Albert
(he'd married into the queen's family), considered low. Because of that, every noble
was desperate to sell me on their daughters.
In the mere half year since I had been entrusted with the throne, I had annexed
Amidionia and had a lot of other big, showy achievements, so people had big hopes
for me. There were always a large number of marriage offers coming in to the castle,
and my chamberlain, Marx, was always busy dealing with them.
"It pains me to always refuse them, so could you at least meet some of them?"
Marx had asked me with pleading eyes, but it'd sounded like a pain, so I had taken a
pass on that.
Even so, I still ended up having to deal with nobles who approached me like this,
intent on not missing their chance.
Of course, the nobles weren't brazen enough to bring these sort of talks up when
one of my fiancées was right there, but whether it was Liscia or Roroa or Aisha, they
were always guaranteed to create an opening to do it. My opinion of the nobles' skill
in that went right past exasperation and entered into the realm of admiration
instead.
Not having much other choice, I greeted the girl. "It's nice to meet you, Madam
Siena. I am Souma Kazuya."
"I have heard your great name before, sire," she said. "I had heard you were a
great sovereign, blessed with both bravery and wisdom, but I am relieved to see,
meeting you like this, that you also seem like a kind person."
"The rumors about me haven't just been exaggerated, they've sprouted limbs and
taken on a life of their own."
"My, you make them sound adorable." Siena wore a quiet smile. She seemed like a
simple girl. These types were always the hardest to deal with.
It was easy to brush off someone who was blatantly just trying to marry into
money and status, but I couldn't be so cruel to a pure, innocent girl. I mean, it was
hard to tell if she was even aware this was an attempt at matchmaking. Well,
regardless of how she herself felt about it, her father was definitely trying to marry
her into money and status.
Moltov took me a short distance from Siena and spoke. "What do you think of my
Siena?"
"...She seems like a very pure and simple young lady," I said. "Very cute."
"Oh, I see! If she pleases you, would you consider taking her as your wife?"
"No, I already have three (four, actually) fiancées..."
"Whatever are you saying? You're still young, sire. You should increase the
number of wives you have. For the royal house's sake. If you're reluctant out of a
sense of duty to Princess Liscia, then I wouldn't mind her being a secondary queen..."
Talking as fast as a machine gun, Moltov tried to push things along. Just when I
was thinking, Ugh, seriously, what a pain. Aisha, can you hurry up and get back
already? it happened.
"Hahh, ha, ha, ha! Hahh, ha, ha, ha!"
That passionate laughter suddenly echoed through the hall.
"Ivan?! That idiot!" Moltov, who only a moment before had the face of a pleasant
old man offering his daughter to me, now had a sour look on his face as he glared up
through the open ceiling at the second floor of the banquet hall.
I followed his gaze to find someone standing on the balcony's railing.
He was a man in his mid-twenties, tall and muscular. With his thick eyebrows,
sharp eyes, and shining white teeth, he had a strangely distinctive face. He was a
passionate young man, one who would not soon leave the memories of anyone who
saw him.
...No, seriously, who was this guy?
The man shouted and leapt down from the balcony. The moment he did...
Ba-bam!
There was a big explosion right behind the young man. The flames rose up, and
there was a roaring blast that shook my stomach. For a moment, I thought he was a
terrorist and was about to panic, but for some reason, the other guests around him
just looked at the young man with wry smiles.
Huh? What? What am I supposed to make of this?
"Your Majesty!" Aisha finally found me and rushed to my side. "Sire, this could be
an attack! Please, stay behind me!"
"...No, there's something weird about it."
"Huh? What do you mean, 'something weird'?"
I looked around, but no one seemed all that flustered. The majority of them were
just looking at the young man with wry or mocking smiles. On closer inspection,
despite how much fire there had been, the area where the blast had gone off behind
the young man wasn't even mildly scorched.
"Oh my, silly brother."
When I turned back, Siena was looking on with a troubled look.
"'Brother'?" I repeated.
"Yes, sire. That would be my elder brother, Ivan Juniro."
"Um... It looked like there was an explosion to me," I said.
"That is my brother's ability. It makes for a gaudy display of fire and noise, but it
is something like an illusion. There is no real force behind it. Hee hee. Isn't he cool?"
"Er... Uh, sure..."
If she was able to write that off as just "cool"... in some ways, this girl might be
pretty impressive.
I see, I thought. The people invited here were those who had regular dealings
with the House of Juniro. Naturally, they must be aware of the family's strange son.
That was why, even when there had been an explosion, they had only reacted with
wry smiles.
Moltov shouted in anger. "Ivan! How can you act so rude in front of His Majesty?!"
"Shut your face, old man!" Ivan struck a pose, and this time there was a flash of
lightning behind him. "You greedy old man, trying to take advantage of Siena's
innocence to push her into a marriage! Even if the heavens allow it, I, her brother,
shall not!"
When he declared that, there was a fire in Ivan's eyes. Literally; fire was shooting
out of his eyes.
...I dunno what to say. I was starting to have a bit of fun. Moltov, on the other
hand, was furious.
"To marry the king is the greatest honor a woman born into a noble house can
hope to achieve for herself! What's wrong with a father wanting his daughter to find
happiness?!"
"Siena can decide her own happiness! It's not something for you to decide for
her!" Ivan shouted.
"Shut up! You're all show, just like your ability!"
"You have the same ability, old man! It's in our blood!"
Their eyes met and sparks flew. Dark clouds formed between them and lightning
struck right in the middle. I'm not speaking in metaphor; these things actually
happened. And yet, there was no damage done. It was entertaining to watch, as long
as you weren't involved.
I turned to Siena and asked her, "Hey, uh... Shouldn't we stop them?"
"They do this all the time," she replied with a grin.
"Oh, okay then..."
Even during our little exchange, the two of them kept heating up.
"Today is the day I finally beat some sense into you!" Moltov shouted.
"That's my line! Bring it, old man!"
"Chowahhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
"Dahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"
As the two approached each other, a bunch of arms and legs appeared between
them, punching and kicking and blocking. It was like someone had made a liveaction adaptation of Dra**on Ball, and that got me pretty excited. For a while, I
watched them enthusiastically, thinking, Yeah, give me more! But then...
"Nearly all of those limbs are illusions," Aisha said. "It's just their real bodies in
the middle, beating the crap out of each other."
I went silent. When Aisha, who had seen through it with the kinetic vision of a
warrior, told me that, it kind of killed the fun.
Five minutes later, Moltov and Ivan collapsed, both of them falling face-up on
their backs at nearly the same time.
"Urgh... Not bad, old man."
"Hmph. I'm not so far over the hill that I'd let you beat me just yet."
Okay, it was showy and all, but all they had been doing was whaling on each
other, so if they were going to pull that "rivals who've communicated through their
fists" routine on me, I wasn't sure how to react... Well, not like it mattered.
Anyway, I walked over to Moltov, who was collapsed on the ground. "Moltov."
"Wh-Why, sire! We've made a miserable display of ourselves! I beg your
forgiveness!" Moltov hurriedly got up and apologized humbly, but I waved a hand
and told him not to worry about it.
"I didn't mind. It made for an entertaining sideshow. On that note, there's
something I'd like to talk to you about..."
"Wh-Whatever might that be?"
"Forget Siena. Would you be willing to give Ivan there to me for the good of the
country?"
""...Come again?"" Moltov and Ivan both blinked in surprise at my request.
◇ ◇ ◇
"...And, well, that's how I hired our exercise guy, Ivan Juniro," I finished.
"You've picked up another weirdo, I see..." Liscia looked at me with exasperation.
Yep, that was her usual response.
Out in the hall, Ivan Juniro the exercise guy gave the children a thumbs-up,
flashing his pearly white teeth as he said, "A healthy mind resides in a healthy body.
Come, children! Train with me, so you grow up strong, kind, and hardy!"
Though Ivan said that, the children had conflicting responses. There were kids
who were all gung-ho about it; kids who were intimidated by his excessive passion
and driven to tears; kids who got scared and clung to Juna... and, overwhelmingly the
most common response, there were kids whose little brains couldn't process the
man who had just appeared in front of them and stood there staring blankly at him.
When she saw the state of affairs in the hall, Liscia asked me, worriedly, "Hold on,
Souma, is that going to be okay?"
"Umm... He's a bit stiff, I guess? Maybe Ivan's feeling tense?"
"This is supposed to be exercise time, right?" Liscia asked. "They can't do it like
that, can they?"
True enough, it wasn't looking like the kids would exercise for us.
In the exercise part of the educational kids shows I was basing this on, there
were kids who would run and roll around, attack the exercise guy, and generally do
whatever they wanted. But, "I think it'll be fine," I said at last. "There's a trick to it,
after all."
"A trick?"
"Heheheh... Hahaha... Bwahahaha!"
In a woman's voice, a three-stage laugh echoed through the hall.
"Who's there?!" Ivan looked around.
When he did, the children shouted, "There!" "Up there!" and pointed upwards.
There was someone standing on the second floor where Ivan had been earlier.
"Make the children strong, kind, and hardy, you say?" the woman called. "How
risible! We, the Black Group who are bent on world domination, will never allow it!"
Those lines that reeked of expository dialogue were spoken by a woman wearing
a mask that covered the top half of her face, a swimsuit-like outfit with a cape that
was open in the center to expose her cleavage, and end-of-the-century style spiked
shoulder pads. She had two horns sprouting from her temples, dragon-like wings on
her back, and a whip-like tail growing out of her backside.
Ivan turned to the woman and shouted, "Just who are you?!"
"I am the evil female commander of the Black Group, Miss Dran," the woman
announced.
Liscia, who was watching at my side, stared blankly for a moment, but she soon
came to her senses, turned to me, and asked, "That's... Carla, right?"
"No. She's the evil female commander, Miss Dran."
"Huh...?"
"That's the evil female commander, Miss Dran, got it?" I said.
"Oh, okay then... Yeah, you know I'm not just going to accept it like that!"
Even as Liscia throttled me, the story was moving along out in the hall.
Miss Dran spread her wings to intimidate Ivan. "If you make the children get
stronger, it could get in the way of the Black Group's plan to conquer the world. I will
detain you before that happens, Ivan Juniro!"
With the highly revealing outfit, she was probably so embarrassed that
desperation had taken over. There was a real, heated passion in Miss Dran's
performance.
Every time Miss Dran did one of her over-the-top actions, certain parts of her
would jiggle. The video quality of the Jewel Voice Broadcast wasn't all that good, so I
didn't think the viewers would notice, but... honestly, I wasn't sure where to look. I
mean, Liscia was right there, glaring at me.
"Don't you think Miss Dran's costume is a little too risque?" she demanded.
"Serina had full control over the design," I defended. "I should mention, I did tell
her to restrain herself because this is supposed to be a kids' show, but... because I
had asked her to help with producing the costume, it was hard to reject it."
"I knew it..." Liscia sighed. "If anything, wouldn't Serina herself have made a
better evil female commander?"
"Could you say that to her face?"
"Not a chance!"
"I know, right?"
While we were talking about that, Ivan thrust a finger in Miss Dran's general
direction. "World domination?! I will never let you get away with it!"
"Hmph, you're spirited, but what can you really do? Have at him, my minions!"
When Miss Dran gave the order, a gaggle of men dressed all in black appeared
and surrounded Ivan. The key point was to have them keep a slight distance from
the children, so as not to make it seem too dangerous.
Ivan fell into a fighting stance, shouting, "Bring it on!"
With that as their cue, the men in black took turns attacking Ivan. Ivan fought
them all one-on-one.
Biff, bash, bam!
There was an exaggerated sound effect every time he hit one of the minions.
When hit, the minions would flip through the air, or spin to the ground and collapse.
It looked impressive, but the sounds came from Ivan's ability, and them being blown
away was all an act, so there was no damage being done.
Incidentally, the children were split half-and-half into those who were scared,
and those whose eyes were shining with excitement as they watched Ivan fight. The
sounds were pretty loud, after all. There was something to be said for not making
the effects too showy.
The children who were frightened naturally huddled with Juna and Roroa, who
told them, "Don't worry, It's going to be okay," and, "That guy's gonna beat 'em up, so
ya don't have to worry," in order to calm them down.
Eventually, Ivan finished defeating all of the minions.
However, Miss Dran kept her self-assured smile. "Heh heh heh. You're not bad,
Ivan Juniro. Well, what will you do about this, then? Come forth, paper box monster,
Danbox!"
"Danbooooox! ...That's me." With those words, a monster that looked like a
person made out of cardboard boxes appeared.
While it had slanted eyes made out of paper on its face... on the whole, it looked
kind of lame. Its silhouette totally made it look like it was constructed out of Le**
blocks, and there was a scratching sound every time its joints moved.
Liscia looked coldly at Danbox. "Isn't that monster a little low quality compared
to the rest?"
"We had passion," I said. "What we lacked was time and budget."
"It really is a harsh world, huh..."
I couldn't make a full-sized kigurumi suit by myself. If I was going to order it from
somewhere, that would take time. That was why, this time, I had ended up okaying
that totally slapdash monster. It was a reminder of how hard things must have been
for the people who made the enemy monsters in the early tokusatsu shows.
Still, while it might have looked kind of bland, Danbox was strong. When it
attacked Ivan, it lifted the 180 centimeter tall, 90 kilogram man as easily as a surfer
picking up a surfboard. Then, like a wrestler showing off their strength, Danbox
spun in place, maintaining its pose as it did.
That ridiculous strength that defied its appearance dumbfounded Liscia. "That's
some incredible monster strength. Oh! Could it be, the person inside is..."
"Yep. It's Aisha."
"What're you making your future second primary queen do...?" she groaned.
"It's a bit late to say that when Juna and Roroa are both already in the program.
You want in, too, Liscia? If you act now, the role of Ivan's sidekick is still open."
"Not. A. Chance."
At that point, Ivan began to struggle. "Darn you, let me go!"
"I am Danboooox."
"Gwah!"
Perhaps Ivan's words had gotten through to the monster, because Danbox
nodded and threw him hard towards a wall that had been prepared for just that
purpose. When he slammed into it, Ivan punched through the wall.
By the way, it was made of light materials to make it easy for him to go through,
so he was only a little hurt. However, Ivan acted as if he were grievously injured,
groaning in pain.
"Urgh, what a powerful monster..."
"Daaaan, bo, bo, box! That's me." Danbox laughed (?) triumphantly.
Ivan pulled himself out of the wall, stumbling, then turned to face the children
and shouted. "If this keep up, we're going to lose. All of you good children, lend me
your power!"
Roroa and Juna explained to the kids what he meant.
"All right, everyone," Roroa said. "Go and spin the glowin' sticks we gave ya.
Shout, 'You can do it!'"
"Let's all send Big Brother Ivan our power," Juna told them. "One, two..."
"""You can do it!"""
At those two's prompting, the children started using the glowing sticks that were
about the size of a piece of chalk to draw circles.
We'd handed out those sticks before the program started. They glowed faintly
because lightmoss, which was used in the city's streetlights because it absorbed light
and then released it in the darkness, had been kneaded into them.
Ivan continued to act like he was in pain as he turned to the children and
shouted, "It's not enough! Not yet! Do it louder, I'm counting on you!"
It always gets kids fired up when an adult says they're counting on them.
This time, when they cheered him on, they were louder and more serious than
the last. """You can do iiiiit!"""
"More! Even louder!"
"""You can do iiiiiiiiiiiiiit!"""
The children shouted until their throats were almost raw, and in the next
moment...
"All right! I've definitely received the kids' energy!"
Ivan's body was enveloped in a flash of light. Then, Ivan's voice echoed from
inside the light.
"Transform!"
When it did, a set of metallic armor, bracers, and a modified sallet helm with a
full-face visor came flying from out of nowhere. Ivan stood still with his arms and
legs spread wide as the pieces "automatically" put themselves on him. That cool
transformation scene made the children cheer.
Meanwhile, at that time, I was behind the stage using my Living Poltergeists
ability to manipulate the metallic equipment. Yes, I controlled Ivan's equipment with
my ability to make it look like he was automatically being equipped with it. Because,
at this range, I could do that even if they weren't dolls.
Liscia was watching me with the who-knows-how-many-th look of exasperation I
had seen from her today. "That's a horrible waste of your ability."
"Hey, a trick is a trick, even if it's just a party trick," I said. "Now, time to get
going."
"Hey, wait, Souma?!"
Once I had confirmed that Ivan's gear was fully equipped, I moved next to the
Jewel Voice Broadcast's jewel, making sure I didn't appear on the broadcast as I did.
Meanwhile, in the hall, the flash of light subsided, and the hero dressed in metallic
equipment appeared. Ivan struck the transformation complete pose, and shouted.
"Charge! Silvan!"
Once he had given his name, I spoke into the jewel so that only my voice would
appear in the broadcast. "Allow me to explain. When Ivan Juniro the Exercise Guy
receives energy from children, he transforms into the metallic hero Silvan." I
clenched my fist as I explained with gusto.
It was a genre standard to have narration explain after the hero's transformation.
I wasn't going to do the thing where they go back and look at the transformation
process scene again, though.
With my role finished, I went back to Liscia's side. She looked horribly exhausted.
"I don't know, it's starting to feel stupid to say anything..."
"Tokusatsu is very much a 'Don't think, feel,' sort of thing," I explained. "If you
don't think about it too deeply, just go with the flow, there's nothing more fun to
watch."
"...I'll do that."
Now then, turning the story back to the hall, the transformed Silvan was strong.
Danbox had been toying with him earlier, but now he showered the monster with
a flurry of punches and kicks, keeping it on the defensive the whole time.
Strong. You're strong, Silvan, everyone had to be thinking. The children were all
worked up, too.
"Da, dan... box..." Eventually, Danbox stumbled and took a knee.
Now was his chance!
"Eat this, Danbox! Ultimate Thunderclap Kick!"
When Silvan unleashed a flying kick, lightning raced along the tip of his foot. That
lightning-infused kick stabbed into Danbox.
I know I keep saying this, but the lightning was a product of his ability. It was, in
effect, just a flying kick, so it didn't hurt Aisha, the person inside Danbox, at all.
However, Danbox stumbled backwards a few steps.
Leaving behind a cry of, "Da... Danboooooooox! That's me!" it exploded scattering
parts in all directions.
Of course, all that really happened was that it hid while Ivan's ability generated
the explosion effect.
With Danbox defeated, Miss Dran, the evil female commander who hadn't had
much to do while she was watching the two of them fight, stamped her feet in
indignation as if she had just remembered what she was supposed to be doing.
"Curse you, Silvan! I'll let you off lightly this time! When I come back, you'd better
be ready!"
With those parting words, she turned and ran off the set to a spot where the
viewers couldn't see her.
Once he had watched her go, Silvan took off just his full-face helmet and thrust
his fist out in the direction Miss Dran had gone. "You and your evil organization who
are plotting to take over the world, the Black Group! If you're going to come, then
come! I will crush your ambitions time and again!"
Ivan declared his resolve and then turned back to the children. Then, with a smile
that seemed a little suffocatingly passionate, he shouted, "Okay, everyone! Let's train
with Silvan Energy Exercises so we won't lose to the bad guys! Stand a little ways
away from each other so you don't bump into your friends!"
Moments later, a cheerful tune started to play in the hall, and Juna and Roroa
came in at just the right moment to split the children up. Then Juna began singing
along with the music.
If you want to grow up strong, do your Silvan Energy Exercises. ♪
"Now, let's start by exercising our upper bodies," Silvan called. "Everyone imitate
a shoujou!"
Eek, eek, eek, ook. Eek, eek, eek, ook.
We are shoujous. Eek, eek, eek, ook.
When Ivan moved in time with the music, the children imitated him.
This exercise routine involved imitating the various animals of this world while
Juna sang comical lyrics. Their lyrics were aimed at children, but the exercises
themselves were based on the radio calisthenics that most Japanese people would
be familiar with (the shoujou imitation was a lateral bending exercise), so they
should be a logical workout.
"You do a lot of ridiculous stuff... But this takes the cake," Liscia suddenly
muttered as she watched the exercises. "This is an educational program, right?
What's the meaning behind the short drama earlier and this exercise?"
Not long ago, I bet she would have asked, "Is there some meaning in it?" instead.
But now, Liscia had asked, "What is the meaning?" It was a only a few words'
difference, but there was a subtle difference of nuance.
In the first, there was an assumption that there was probably no meaning to it. In
the latter, there was a confidence that there must be some meaning and that she
wanted to know what it was. I could feel her trust in that subtle change, and that
made me a little happier.
"Of course there's a meaning," I said. "If we draw in their attention with the short
drama, more people will watch. The exercises are good for the children's health and
development. I'm actively trying to spread them. But, more than anything, what I
want to spread is the word 'hero.'"
"The word 'hero'?"
That was just when, out in the hall, the interlude part of Silvan's Energy Exercises
began.
Ivan turned to the kids and spoke to them. "You're all doing great! Now then,
there's something I wanted to tell you. To become a truly strong person, you need
more than just power. If you forget to be kind, too, then you're just a brute!"
Then he turned towards the Jewel Voice Broadcast jewel, which is to say towards
the viewers, and spoke.
"The truth is, I'd like to be friends with the Black Group, too. If we could talk
things over, we might not need to resort to our fists. That's why, no matter who
you're up against, never give up on trying to understand them. What do you do if
they're still unreasonable and violent, you ask? That's right! To make sure you can
protect those close to you, do your Silvan Energy Exercises!"
The interlude ended at the perfect time, and Ivan began exercising along with the
song again.
When she heard Ivan's words, after closing her eyes for a moment, Liscia said,
"'Being strong isn't enough. Don't forget to be kind, too. Never give up on
understanding one another'... This is what you wanted to get across."
She whispered the words again, as if reflecting upon them.
I nodded silently. "When you're little, the words adults say to you have a strange
way of sticking with you, right? Especially if they're coming from a hero, those words
will remain in some corner of your heart even when you grow up. As a bonus, when
we say these things to the children, we can count on their caretakers hearing them,
too."
Then I dropped the lighthearted, joking attitude and adopted a more serious
tone.
"There's a lull right now, but eventually every country will have to face the
Demon Lord's Domain. These words are something I'm laying down now to prevent
that from turning into an utter quagmire that won't end until one side or the other is
exterminated. Between Tomoe's ability and the information we've exchanged with
the Empire, we've learned that we can't lump everyone in the Demon Lord's Domain
together. If possible, before there's any fighting, I'd like to hold talks with those that
seem amenable to them, like the kobolds who spared the mystic wolves."
"Right..."
"I feel like, when that time comes, the number of adults in this country who are
strong, kind, and willing to not give up on understanding the other side will decide
this country's fate," I said. "If most of them can only think, 'Exterminate the demons,'
we're headed straight for total war. The more people there are who think, 'There
must be demons who can understand us,' the more of other paths we'll be able to
see."
When I said that, Liscia laughed a little, then poked me in the shoulder. "I'm
satisfied with the explanation, but... isn't this all a bit idealistic for you?"
"It's a kids' show, okay? I want the kids to have ideals. Wouldn't you? I mean,
when kids are strangely realistic about things, that's just unbearable to see."
"...I suppose you're right."
"Besides, it's an adult's job to look at reality so that the children can continue to
talk about ideals."
It was the job of a king, too. While searching for a brighter future, I had to
prepare for the possibility that a dark future might come, too. In order to remain
kind, strength was an absolute necessity. I needed to raise the strength of the nation,
expand our arsenal, and set things up so that we could endure a total war if it came
to that. To create a nation that was like a great tree with its roots firmly in the
ground, one that wouldn't shake even when the storm came.
While I was thinking about that, it looked like the exercises had finished. Ivan
said, "Well done!" and patted a nearby kid on the head. The host, Juna, took over
from there.
"How did you like the program we just brought to you, Singing With Big Sis? This
time, we are shooting inside the castle, but we're thinking about doing live
broadcasts from theaters around the country in future, too. When we do, we'll be
looking for children to sing and exercise with us, so all you mommies and daddies
out there, bring your kids to come play with us! Now, until next time, everyone
together now..."
When Juna gave the signal, the children, Roroa, Ivan, and Little Musashibo, who'd
subtly snuck back in for the ending, all faced the camera and waved.
"""Bye, bye!"""
With everyone's voices, this world's first educational broadcast came to a close.
"It's so hot... Just let me die..." Pamille moaned.
"Good work out there, Pamille," Juna told her.
Pamille, who had been inside Little Musashibo, was now groggy from the heat.
The kigurumi suit must have been pretty hot inside. Juna was there fanning her.
Next to Pamille was Carla, holding her knees and sobbing in the fetal position.
"Having to be broadcast in that getup... I'm so embarrassed I could die."
It seemed that having that super skimpy Miss Dran outfit broadcast had left her
in a state of shock.
...Yeah, I could kind of sympathize. Serina could be such a complete and total
sadist.
"Whose fault was this?" she burst out. "Yours, master?"
"You're turning on me?! That costume was Serina's decision, okay?!"
"Ahahaha..." she laughed in a strange voice. "Well, you know, they say a superior
is responsible for decisions their subordinates make, don't theeeey?"
Carla had eyes like some sort of yandere character. I was worried I might get
taken out with a squish, or a crunch, or a stab, stab! (I was scared to even describe
what I was imagining, so I tried using onomatopoeia instead.)
"Calm down, Carla!" I shouted. "If you kill me, you'll die, too!"
"I'm so embarrassed I could just die... I'll take you with me..."
Oh, crap, I thought. That look in her eyes, she's kind of serious.
"Aisha, help!" I yelled.
"Madam Carla! We're in the castle, in the castle!" Aisha shouted.
"Don't stop me, Madam Aisha!" Carla screamed. "If I don't kill him, I can't die
myself!"
While Aisha was holding her in a pinion, I made a hasty retreat.
Why was I catching all the flak for Serina's sadistic tendencies? Well, it was just
Carla venting her hopeless embarrassment as anger, no doubt.
...Probably.
Now, to get straight to the point, Together With Big Sis was a hit.
Especially with the adults.
I know I'd made it with children as the target audience, but for some reason their
parents, guardians, and even adults with no children at all were even more
passionate about it.
For the women, it was Little Musashibo's adorableness, and the slightly-toopassionate-but-still-hot Ivan's appeal.
For the men, it was the coolness of the first tokusatsu hero they'd ever seen,
paired with the sexy villainess played by Carla.
Well, even in Japan, there were sometimes mothers who got even more hooked
on a program than their children because they were watching it for the hot actors. It
was probably something like that.
That being the case, in the Kingdom of Friedonia, on days when Together With
Big Sis was on, rather than children begging their parents to go see it, you would
often see parents begging their children.
W-Well, either way, kids were seeing the program, so it was all good, but I got a
cold look from Liscia when she found out the situation.
"'It's an adult's job to look at reality,' he says."
"W-Well, hey, what's wrong with adults having dreams?" I stammered.
Liscia stared at me silently.
"...No, seriously, how did it turn out like this anyway?" I muttered.
I felt like the bizarreness level of Friedonia had gone up just a little.