[What the hell are you doing?]
"I was just messing around," Cid said, laughing.
[By setting trees on fire with a matchstick? Just because you can't use fire-based ninjutsu?]
The forest in front of them was scorched black, the trees reduced to ash.
Cid shrugged, brushing it off. "Not my problem," he said before vanishing into thin air.
_______________________________________________________
"Why call a meeting now, His Will?" muttered a figure wearing a swirling mask. He glared at a half-black, half-white mass sprouting from the ground. What surprised him was the trembling of the usually calm entity.
"Madara, it's urgent. I can sense a familiar aura—one I'd rather forget," said His Will, his voice shaky.
"I don't care," Madara replied, dismissing him with a wave. "Increase surveillance or do whatever you want. It's none of my concern."
"You don't understand," His Will insisted. "Zetsu alone isn't enough. You need to investigate and find it."
Madara's eyes narrowed. "It's none of my concern, His Will. You're just a servant. Act like one."
"OBITO!" His Will snapped, his voice filled with desperation. "You need to understand. That thing is not someone to take lightly. He's risen again!"
Madara froze at the sound of his true name. His cold gaze turned sharp, and in a flash, he stabbed His Will with a wooden dagger.
"I told you not to use that name," Madara growled. But his tone shifted, more thoughtful now. If His Will had gone so far as to use his real name, the situation must be serious.
"Search for a being radiating otherworldly Yin energy. That's him," His Will said weakly, the dagger still embedded in his chest.
Madara sighed, his anger subsiding. "Who's him?" he asked, calmer now.
"The King of Curses," His Will whispered, his voice trembling.
____________________________________
'Do I really need to go to the academy? Tsk, tsk,' Cid thought, strolling lazily toward the building.
[You were losing your mind when you realized you were in Naruto. Now you're acting like it's no big deal.]
'There's no reason to be scared right now,' Cid replied in his thoughts, still walking casually.
[You don't even know how to fix your problem, dude. You can't use ninjutsu—how are you planning to survive?]
'I can't use elemental jutsu or interact with chakra-based techniques at all. My energy rejects the balance needed for those skills. Cursed Energy is pure Yin—it's rooted in negativity and completely lacks Yang's physical life force. Without that balance, I'm limited to spiritual manipulation and raw destructive force.
My Cursed Energy isn't incomplete—it's fundamentally incompatible with the chakra system,' Cid explained in his mind.
[...Wait, you're actually smart?]
'I'm not an idiot. I even know how to fix this problem: Reverse Cursed Technique,' thought Cid.
[You already lost one hand trying that. Wasn't that enough?]
'If Cursed Energy can be amplified into destructive force, then logically, it can be reversed into restorative or life-giving energy. Like flipping a coin—Yin could become Yang under the right conditions. I just haven't figured out how to trigger it yet,' Cid mused.
[Oh, so you're saying you're not using RCT correctly?]
'Exactly. It doesn't seem to work the same way in this world. That's why I need to master RCT first. Once I do, I'll cook this entire verse,' Cid thought, smirking as he finally reached the academy.
He ignored the stares from other students—after all, he was 15 minutes late.
____________________________________________________
"Tardy again, Gojo. You're supposed to be a role model for the other students," said Iruka, arms crossed. Despite the scolding, Cid managed to get off with nothing more than a light warning. After all, when you're strong, you get privileges.
"Yeah, sorry, Iruka-sensei," Cid replied, his expression full of regret.
Iruka looked at him, clearly moved. 'Such a humble boy, respecting authority even with his immense talent,' Iruka thought.
"Go sit next to Sasuke," Iruka instructed, gesturing toward the dark-haired boy.
Cid nodded and took his seat beside Sasuke. 'How easily fooled—just a bit of acting,' Cid thought, suppressing a grin.
Sasuke turned to him, his expression surprisingly friendly. "Cid Gojo, right? Nice to meet you," he said, extending a hand for a handshake.
'Is this really Sasuke? Where's the emo act?' Cid thought, cautiously shaking his hand.
"You seem surprised. Was I not what you expected of an Uchiha?" Sasuke asked, his grip firm.
"N-no," Cid stammered, though the pressure didn't bother him.
'What the hell is going on here?' he wondered.
[Probably the butterfly effect, genius. You didn't notice the Uchiha clan is still alive, did you? No massacre means no emo phase or Batman wannabe vibes.]
'But he was a jerk even before the massacre,' Cid thought, uneasy. The realization hit him—his presence, even for a single day, had already caused noticeable ripples. The weight of that was unsettling.
Sasuke was rambling on about Konoha's downfall or whatever, complete with dramatic pauses and righteous indignation. Cid wasn't paying attention—his soul left his body halfway through Sasuke's monologue. But then, he felt a hand on his shoulder.
"Ignore him. He's in dire need of therapy," said a girl with golden-yellow hair, piercing blue eyes, and faint cat-like lines on her face. Her cheeks bore three whisker marks, giving her an oddly foxish vibe.
"And you are?" Cid asked, feigning ignorance, though he already knew.
'I've officially destroyed this timeline. A female Naruto? Fantastic,' thought Cid.
"Naruko Uzumaki, heir to the Uzumaki Clan, and Sasuke's best—and only—friend!" she said, flashing a bright smile.
Cid blinked, then immediately lost interest. He turned back to the board, pretending to care about Iruka's lesson. Sure, he wasn't paying attention, but sleeping in class would ruin the humble-boy image he was trying so hard to cultivate.
'Did this guy just ignore me?' Naruko thought, glaring at Cid.
[She's onto you. Take her out now, before she gets too close.]
'Are you insane? You want the Nine Tails rampaging because I killed its host?' Cid shot back. He glanced at Sasuke, who was still mid-rant about Konoha.
"…And that's how I met your mother," Sasuke concluded, smugly folding his arms.
"Wait, how did you go from gay sex between the Nara and Akimichi clans to that?" Cid asked, genuinely baffled.
"Through the continuous application of the Bullshittery Technique, combined with Clause 3 of the Men's Rulebook, as decreed by the Federation of Incels," Sasuke explained, dead serious.
"Understandable," Cid replied with a straight face.
"Are you two serious right now?!" Naruko exclaimed, appalled.
"How are you suddenly next to me? And is that my lunch?" Cid asked, eyeing the rice ball in her hand.
"Heheh… But answer my question!" Naruko demanded, taking a bite of his food.
"His reasoning is sound," Cid said, nodding at Sasuke, who nodded back in agreement.
"Naruko! Answer the question on the board!" Iruka barked, chucking a piece of chalk at her head.
"HEY! Sensei, they were the ones talking, not me!" Naruko protested, pointing dramatically at Sasuke and Cid.
"They complete their homework and aren't operating at room-temperature IQ. Now, answer the question," Iruka said, unimpressed.
"No fair, Sensei! I was only intervening to stop them from destroying the classroom's decorum!"
"Sasuke's reasoning is sound," Iruka added, backing up his favorite student.
"NOT YOU TOO, SENSEI!" Naruko wailed, turning to the board in defeat. It was a basic slope problem—simple for most, but not for Naruko.
She peeked at Cid's sheet, the only item he'd bothered to bring to class. He didn't even have a pen, just a stolen pencil and that one miserable sheet of paper.
"The answer is 4/3!" Naruko declared confidently. Cid barely suppressed a snort of laughter.
[She didn't fall for that, did she?]
'Oh, she absolutely did,' thought Cid, grinning internally.
"Idiot," Iruka sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "The answer is supposed to be in terms of tan θ. How in the world did you get 4/3?"
"Uhh… I used Dahmer's Rule," Naruko said, clearly winging it.
"Who the hell is Dahmer?" Sasuke muttered, his brow furrowing.
Iruka's patience finally snapped. "Get out of my class."
"WHAT?! This is so unfair! He showed me the wrong answer!" Naruko whined, pointing an accusatory finger at Cid.
"I'm sending you out using Ruler's Rule," Iruka said, picking up a ruler and waving it at her menacingly.
Naruko yelped and scrambled out of the room like a frightened cat, leaving the entire class in stitches.
___________________________________________________________
[What exactly are we doing here?]
"I'm training, since your useless ass isn't giving me any quests," Cid grumbled, cracking his knuckles.
[I can only give you quests once you reach two fingers.]
"Oh, so we're gatekeeping progress now? Classic system behavior. You're still a bitch," said Cid, rolling his eyes.
Cid started his training routine. First, he used Dismantle to chop logs into chunks, then shaped them into various forms with Cleave. After that, he tied several logs to himself and began running in circles around a small clearing in the massive forest near his house.
[Convenient how your house just happens to be next to an entire goddamn forest. Plot armor much?]
Cid ignored the jab, focusing on his training. The first set of logs felt like nothing, but as he added more logs and upped the intensity, fatigue began to set in. Despite his muscles screaming in protest, he pushed through several more laps before finally collapsing onto the ground, panting.
"Eighty-nine circles… that's my limit," Cid muttered, his voice laced with exhaustion.
[Well, we all start somewhere. Though, let's be honest—this is barely a montage-worthy effort.]
Cid groaned, glaring up at the sky. "I'd like to see you lug around a dozen logs without a body, you trash-tier voice-in-my-head."
[Let me know when you hit a hundred laps, tough guy. Or is eighty-nine your Naruto filler arc level?]
"I swear to god, I'll dismantle you one day," Cid snapped before hauling himself upright.
He took a moment to examine his progress—or lack thereof. His legs felt like noodles, his shirt was soaked with sweat, and his once-pristine logs were splintered messes.
"Great. Now I look like a dehydrated hamster and have nothing to show for it," Cid muttered.
[Oh, don't worry. If there's an Olympic event for running in circles while complaining, you're taking gold.]
Cid rolled his eyes and leaned against a tree, but the moment he touched it, Dismantle activated unintentionally, slicing the tree cleanly in half.
The massive trunk tipped over with an earth-shaking crash, sending birds scattering from the canopy.
"…Oops," Cid said, staring at the destruction.
[Fantastic. Now you're deforesting the place. Congratulations, Captain Planet would like a word.]
Cid waved it off. "Not my problem. The forest's gotta earn its keep."
Suddenly, a wild boar burst out of the bushes, snorting angrily. It charged straight at him, clearly upset about the loss of its favorite scratching tree.
"Oh, come on!" Cid groaned, scrambling to dodge the boar. He leaped onto a nearby stump, narrowly avoiding being impaled.
[Nature's fighting back. Karma's a real bitch, huh?]
"Shut up and help me!" Cid yelled, but the system just cackled in his head.
The boar rammed the stump, sending Cid flying into a bush. He emerged a moment later, disheveled but unharmed, glaring at the boar.
"Fine. You wanna go? Let's go!" Cid shouted, activating Dismantle.
In one swift motion, he sliced through the boar's tusks, leaving it stunned. The animal squealed and bolted back into the forest, deciding that messing with this lunatic wasn't worth it.
[Congratulations. You've officially declared war on wildlife. What's next, punching a squirrel?]
Cid dusted himself off, grumbling. "Next time, I'm cleaving bacon off that thing."