I reached the same restaurant where Asher had threatened me recently and I secured a corner seat.
I had arrived 30 minutes prior as I wanted to sort out a few things to get a grip on the situation that was going to take place. Not to forget the fact when it comes to my personal life, I suck at making any decision, and giving up on things was the easiest way. My own insecurities would always win over me, and it was high time I should stop giving or finding reasons. It was time to face this bastard irrespective of the consequences.
I can't get over Ralph. I should accept this universal fact, and also, I should suck another universal truth. Asher's hold on Ralph was way stronger; it couldn't be undone easily. I should come to terms with my feelings and start taking determined steps. I can't neglect my feelings anymore.
My running marathon was not that helpful as I am bloody ending up with the same person. How? That's a big mystery. I swear I tried my best, but the result was the same.
I am not going to let go of Ralph without fighting this time. After my sincere efforts, if he still crawls back to that bastard, I should let him go permanently.
I was not sincere with my feelings; I didn't fight for him; and I left him. I didn't acknowledge whether my presence mattered in his life or not. Mine was not selfless love, but it was selfish, expecting, expecting, always expecting rather than accepting things and fighting for it.
I had taken a dangerous step when I laid my eyes on Ralph, and when I was aware of his relationship, I didn't take a step backward, but when things started threatening, that's when I retreated step by step.
From Day 1 it was complicated for me; signs were there, but still, I ended up pursuing Ralph. There was no regret, but I should have been selfless. Could I have afforded to be selfless? Probably not, but who knows? Things might have worked out.
Dating Ralph for a few months was a damn wonderful experience; if things turned into years, I would welcome a damn fight. There were so many questions that needed attention before jumping, but I can't afford any delay at this point. I don't know how things will turn out between Ralph and me once we start digging out things that have happened in the past, no matter what, I will welcome the outcome, and without a fight, I am not letting him crawl back to that bastard.
Mistakes happen, but I hope he doesn't take it out on me at every damn chance he gets. Let's not forget the fact that he was not any saint. Once again, I am trying to defend myself for my actions. I couldn't just overcome everything, could I? I guess old habits die harder; in my case, I would never let them die.
I huffed. When I was done with self-evaluation, I noticed my surroundings, which were rather pin-drop silent. The restaurant door opened; Asher entered as stunning as ever. I bet he was spending way too much on his skin routine.
It was showtime.
Asher occupied the opposite chair. A female waiter approached immediately with a broad smile barely holding her enthusiasm, and I totally got her. She took his order; thank God she noticed my presence and took mine, too. It's been a few minutes since he entered the restaurant already, he started glaring at me. A few things never change.
I reciprocated his glaring with my calm eyes. I didn't want to start anything that wouldn't turn fruitful for me. I wanted to be done with this conversation as soon as possible and get the hell out of here.
"Well, fucking speak! What are you waiting for?" He probed and I rolled my eyes. If anything, I want to get to the point straight and get the hell out by cautioning him to stay away from my fucking life forever.
Trust me, that sounds simple, but it's a lot. I need bloody stamina to get something off my chest, so I answered humorously. "My coffee." He chuckled. "You can be snarky too, way too many surprises from yesterday. The dog, which never barked and was good at snooping, now started biting. Interesting."
Our order arrived; she took her own time to place it, trying her best to seduce in the given seconds, and with so much force, she retreated her steps. Thank God for that; I started sipping my coffee. I needed to gain all the strength for the next couple of minutes.
"Will you spare me from your fucking muteness and bless me by opening your bloody mouth? I don't get all day. Let's not mask our true nature in front of each other. As I said before, you are a whole lot of a different person behind those fucking glasses." "Once again, I should affirm to you that I am not anything like you. Let's not debate on that and waste our time. Call the board and revoke the order that you have thrown." He was surprised once again because it was an order, and he was not used to receiving an order; he was only good at giving. I continued sipping.
"I am not able to hide my excitement, trust me. You better have some backup for the order you have thrown if you need me to follow, of course." When I was done with my coffee, I placed the empty cup aside by pulling out my cell I forwarded the videos and placed my cell on the table.
His cell started hitting with notifications, and I waited patiently. I didn't want to interrupt him at any norms, not because I was afraid but because those videos need damn time as the content was sensational. After watching everything, he threw his cell on the table. He took his time to digest it and to compose himself; he did it just the way switching the character in front of the camera.
"Bravo I am impressed once again, you have done your research. How the heck did you get your hold on the latest video? Even Ralph's family and friends were not successful in getting those. Well, you are good at lurking around and snooping, so no surprise." He paused to catch his breath. This was not the reaction I expected. I was expecting an initial denial followed by shock or a synonym for that. "You are not going to deny, at least for the sake of it, it's not proud moments if you kind of forgot." He chuckled. "Why would I? It's clearly me, and there's nothing wrong in trying stuff." "So, nothing wrong if it's leaked on every social media?"
The atmosphere changed, and he started fuming. He didn't deny anything, so I am not getting his sudden anger. Doing drugs and having intense sex with co-actors were his proud moments when he was engaged to someone else, not anyone but Ralph. What the hell was wrong with these people? Ralph is bloody filthy rich, with the same status and everything, but he is nothing like this bastard. Thank God for that, or else I wouldn't dare to end up in this position.
"Every fucking dog has its day. I will call the board. Anything else, I am at your fucking service." If that was the case, I really want him to vanish from Ralph's life permanently. One could wish, right? "Don't try to threaten me, in the future. I will be glad to collect more videos." As the minute passed, the feeling that I was digging my own grave was getting immense. He was barely holding back. Why he was this calm? Whenever he was facing me, it would be like at any second, he wanted to rip me off.
"You are doing everything to get burned, aren't you?" "Well, before facing you, I have prepared myself thoroughly. If I am going to get burned, I am taking you along with me; trust me, you have my word on that." "Do you think I am that easy?" "I am tougher, so I will make things easy now." "I am not getting why. All I am asking is to stay away from Ralph; problem solved. You wouldn't gain any attention from me." If that was fucking easy, would I want to draw unnecessary attention from this possessive maniac? Not in my fucking dream.
"Thanks for the suggestion, but I am afraid I have to pass. I tried, but I failed. Look where I ended." I really hate myself and am confused about my situation. Why Ralph? Why was I going through all these things? Why do I always end up with him? Can't I just give up completely and move on? I am into a jerk who was obsessed with a betrayer, great.
"You won't stop lurking around?" There we go again. So badly I want to, but I am not able to. "At present, he is single; that doesn't mean I am going to try my chance. He needs time, and I am going to wait for him, but I will never let him go again. Not this time." I was firm with my decision, and he could see through me. Whatever he was feeling I just added more, and I care less at this point; he had balled his fist so tightly I was afraid it was going to bleed, oh god he was not only possessive but a kind of psychopath. Am I less than him? At this point, I don't think so.
"I hope you know what you are fucking talking about before any damage happens." I chuckled. "That was a clear threat. By now, you should have some idea about the person that I have become. I have collected videos that you tried to clear from everywhere, and you concluded there was no evidence, and here I am with the same evidence. Let me be frank with you: there are many other videos I don't think even Ralph is aware of. I am not going to threaten you with those videos, but I won't think twice about using them. Indeed, your statement is true. Every dog has a day, and I am a loyal dog. He smirked in return. "Are you done because I have to catch the bloody plane?" "I have declared what I wanted, and this time I am going after what I want; nothing is going to stop me." He was stirring the straw that was in the juice, which he didn't bother to take a sip of. He started smiling. Something was off about the smile, which was obvious, and I don't fucking care at this point, but still, the more I get a clear image of his thinking, the more I can be prepared.
He hummed. "Do you fucking think that I am not approaching Ralph because of some fucking restraining order? Do you fucking think Ralph will get over me that easily, or I will fucking let him? Do you fucking think that because he stays with you, that means he will fucking start and stay in the relationship? Can you fucking make him fall for you and make sure he stays with you forever? Do you fucking know my hold on him? I may fuck anyone, but I will make sure to end with Ralph. Only with him. Got it? Let me rephrase in one sentence: Ralph is mine and always will be irrespective of whatever occurs between us, I will fucking claim him again, again, and again. Let's play this, like real dirty. I am not going to use any power, no fucking threats but I will fucking make sure to hit you so harder the heartache will be for a lifetime. I will make sure that you won't recover this time so you fucking don't get the audacity to bite back, but you will be alive to witness everything that would go on in Ralph's life, which will be with me. Wow, I like this feeling already. I can smell the victory."
He stood from the chair and started walking. He paused at the door. Of course, he should give a final touch. "I will make sure you regret this time, and I will also make sure to hit you harder. There will be no physical damage, but you will never recover from the pain. Trust me, this time I will make sure to keep every word of mine; till then, sayonara."
I swear I almost thought of taking a step toward my running marathon.