There was love in Aurelia's heart.
I had never once considered the thought. It was always her condescending tone and awful attitude that came to mind when I thought of her.
Maybe that thought was what confused me.
Making me question why she saved me.
It plagued my mind and motivated me to face her. Moreover, it loosened the tight knot that dulled my emotions.
My selfish goal was to earn more than her trust and restore our old relationship.
However, what I intended to mend in our relationship, now feels unfixable.
'I don't intend to stay worthless in your eyes forever.'
I flaunted those words to her, uplifted and uncertain of the future. But following through with them was another thing entirely.
My incompetence, rather my lack of motivation was what drove her to title me as trash.
Aurelia called my actions cowardly. It pissed me off. Enough to the point that I spouted nonsense at her.
How was I supposed to follow through with my words?
Paying her back by means of saving her life in return could work. Unfortunately, such a decision was out of my hands at this point.
Our options were already limited the moment my statement left my mouth. Even if I wanted to succeed and save her, it felt like a nearly impossible task.
Bringing Kayden into this as per the plan would increase our odds for this loop. It was my intention to begin with, so it's not bad to rely on that.
Hmm. Yeah, that might work!
Wait. Hold on. No, I couldn't do that.
A swift self-slap to the face broke me from that restrictive, desperate mindset.
I'm already forgetting the intention behind my words.
I can't be worthless anymore. In Aurelia's eyes, that means using what I have and genuinely trying for once.
She wanted to see improvement. She wanted to see an effort.
Getting help from others diminished that effort.
Then... what was I supposed to do?
August is my only lifeline here. After all, he's the reason I'm doing any of this in the first place. But in this situation, he's beyond offering help.
His countless efforts so far have amounted to a subtle nudge in the direction we're after.
I needed a new plan. One to start from scratch with. That meant abandoning everything I've worked towards until this point.
Just thinking about it frustrates me. However, the choice was mine and mine alone.
What kind of brother would I be now if I just let my sister die?
Actually, considering the circumstances, probably not any different.
It may be a roundabout way of shaping the situation. But, I have been putting effort toward ending this endless loop the entire time. The only thing I haven't put effort toward is saving my sister's life.
In the end, I needed to be more than a bystander to her death.
With a new plan, maybe I could help. However, moving forward with only telepathy, ignoring how strong it is, was not a great move.
This loop felt hopeless, but-
As I looked upon the setting sun along the horizon, my eyes fell on an option long considered unavailable to me.
It was a gamble to rely on this, and if it failed, it would only stand to waste my time. However, with strong motivation pushing my legs forward and a good intention finally settled in my heart.
I went to the school's gardens.
My ears filled with a nostalgic static.
The ever-darkening greenery surrounded me on all sides. Only one path remained from where I once came.
I remembered the same steps August and I once took in the past.
Left, right, left, straight, right, left.
Now that I was here, a nervousness like never before gripped my heart.
If this failed, I wouldn't know what to do. Without anything to support the weak and inexperienced August Vale, we would perish.
Again, I would face a scowling Professor Grimrose.
And everything I said to Aurelia. Everything she said to me...
It would all become meaningless.
I was suddenly reminded of the first loop's desperate August Vale. Wondering if I held the same expression as he once did.
There was no need to hesitate. Time was dwindling. Pushing aside the greenery in front of me, I entered the garden depths.
Unlike last time, I landed on my feet. However, that advantage quickly disappeared, as I was unprepared to land.
With the darkness overtaking my sight, I had no awareness of the ground. I unintentionally fell backward.
Visibility was voided the moment I entered.
The floor, walls and even the opening I entered from were all hidden from sight. The setting sun couldn't reach the crevice from where I stood.
It would take time for my eyes to adjust, but for now, I called out to the neverending abyss.
"Spirits! My name is Mackenzie Everblade! I have come to make a contract!"
I repeated the same words I was once instructed to pronounce.
However, all that followed was a deafening silence.
My nervous heart accelerated. The same failure again brought me disappointment.
Without the help of a spirit, I held no chance against the monster that was Lysander. Hell, even with the spirit, my chances were still infinitesimally low.
But it was all I had.
Otherwise, what could I do on my own?
I still feared Lysander's blade. The thought of his knife cutting my throat still plagued my mind.
Maybe it was why I tried getting the help of others. To have them stand in place for me. To have them die instead of me.
Without any support. Without any form of strength. I'm unable to face Lysander.
That's why I need this power.
It made me feel pathetic.
But in the end, that's all I am.
'BZZZZ'
The only thing there to comfort me was the emotionless static.
'...Coward...'
Now even the static mocked me for my attitude.
"Yeah... I know, I'm a coward..."
As the words left my mouth, I quickly realized what I'd heard.
'...I like.... coward...'
My eyes quickly opened, searching for the source of the voice.
I knew I wasn't hallucinating because the static had suddenly disappeared. Its presence now was replaced with the husky voice of a child.
'Running... away... safe....'
As telepathy picked up the voice, the disappointment in my heart rapidly faded. However, the voice itself was difficult to make out.
'...Hiding... safe...'
Running away and hiding? Safety? What was the voice talking about?
'...Doing nothing... safe...'
This voice... Was it mocking me?
No. That couldn't be the case. It did say it liked me, at the very least, it likes the cowardly side of me.
'I like... nothing...'
This spirit (if this is actually a spirit) was strange. It was nothing of the spirits I knew of from The Wish of Eternal Love.
It sounded... kind of depressing.
It made the atmosphere in this pitch-black pit uncomfortable, to say the least. And although the atmosphere it created was strange, I still called out to it.
"Spirit, I ask but one request of you. Could you please form a contract with me?"
'...Contract...?'
Its curious voice resounded in my ears. Shortly after, the voice disappeared, as if pondering the decision.
'...You smell... cowardly...'
Only to respond to my request with an insult.
'... I like... cowardly...'
As the voice disappeared, I suddenly felt a chill run down my spine. It felt as though another presence was staring me down with daggers.
Fearing for my life, I quickly turned. However, a dirt wall was all my eyes laid upon.
'Wait... a dirt wall?'
The realization came to me right then. I looked around the garden depths just to be sure.
But my eyes weren't deceiving me. What was once unvisable in the vast darkness of this crevice, was now as bright as day.
'Did the spirit do this?'
'Yes.'
The sudden response shocked me.
I heard the voice, yet this time, it was much different. Unlike telepathy, where I heard the internal thoughts of others. This time, it felt like the voice spoke directly to my brain.
Still sounding husky and childish, the spirit spoke to me.
'For a contract. I need a name.'
A name huh?
Unaware of the need, I didn't come prepared with one. In a moment of panic, I racked my brain for something.
"Uhh... How about Dusk?"
It only came to mind as remembered the sight of the setting sun outside. The name may be simple, but I was put on the spot here, and the most I could do was think of the time of day.
'Dusk. I like.'
Thankfully they accepted. And the moment they did, a small black mark appeared on the back of my right hand.
Growing in size, the mark traveled down my forearm. Its final shape resembled that of black stars, shrouding my pale skin.
'Contract complete.'
Once the words came from the spirit, I felt an unimaginable relief overcome me. Falling to my knees, I sighed.
My nervous heart finally began to settle. I was so glad it worked.
This loop wasn't a failure after all.
But in my moment of relief, another voice appeared.
[A nameless god has recognized your choice.]
[A class will now be bestowed upon the individual 'Mackenzie Everblade']
It was the voice of the gods.
In the heat of the moment, I had almost forgotten the consequences of this choice.
Once a class is chosen by the gods, there is only one path left to take.
[You are now recognized as a 'Spirit Magician']
From this point onward, there was no turning back.