To selfishly achieve such a goal, what must one do? To live according to one's ideals, whether they come from this life or a previous one.
He didn't have the answers. All he understood was that he had himself — and even that "himself" wasn't quite the same as the one he remembered from his youth.
Before everything unraveled — before the world's upheaval seized him, threatened him, and changed him — life had seemed a little brighter.
For the person he was now, rather than the person he once was, how would he view his current life? Would he say he was content? Would he look forward to tomorrow? If so, how would he compare his present self to his past self?
A storm of feelings — joy, sorrow, regret, greed, selfishness, anger, bitterness — swirled through his thoughts. Yet, if he had to choose…
He was content right now… indeed, he was content.
+-+
"Yasushi…" Jingliu's voice drifted through the air, carrying a soft echo.
The young man blinked awake, his eyes opening slowly as he leaned against the tree where he had drifted off. The gentle rustling of leaves and the whisper of the breeze had lulled him into a nap, but now, he was being roused by the presence of his girlfriend. He lifted his gaze to find her standing before him, dressed in a flowing white sundress that fluttered in the wind, sandals on her feet, and a straw hat perched atop her head. Her face was lit with a warm smile, and she extended her hand towards him.
He accepted her gesture and allowed himself to be pulled from his resting spot. "Sorry, I must have dozed off. I just couldn't resist the fresh air. I'll miss this breeze when we head back and face the snow for the next eight months," he admitted, his voice tinged with a weary chuckle.
She maintained her smile as she placed her hands gently on his cheeks, giving them a tender squeeze. "I understand, but sleeping outside, even in summer, isn't very safe unless you're in a designated spot. We have those available, you remember?"
"I do," he responded, "I suppose it was just a spur-of-the-moment thing." His words lacked a more substantial explanation, but he hoped this would suffice.
Jingliu fixed her gaze on him, a mix of amusement and exasperation in her eyes. She shook her head before speaking. "Come on. We have today and tomorrow left before we return to Japan. I want to take you to see the waterfalls that you missed out on."
"Huanglong Waterfall," he murmured under his breath, and Jingliu gave a confirming nod.
"Even though it's not evening yet, it has its own allure during the day. So let's go," she said, taking his hand and guiding him away.
Yasushi, having no objections, allowed himself to be led along. They left the Yang family's residence and meandered through the town, pausing at various food stalls to grab some snacks and drinks as they went.
During the past month, Yasushi had forged some friendships and made acquaintances throughout Mengyinhu, largely thanks to his actions, including putting a stop to the disruptions caused by Zihan's group. Despite his efforts to get updates from Heinz regarding the situation, he had received no new information. For now, he chose to be patient and wait.
+-+
After their brief exploration of the town, they arrived at the waterfall, a destination Yasushi had long intended to visit but had always been sidelined by a series of unforeseen events. The waterfall stood before them, a majestic sight that seemed to fulfill a long-held desire of his, despite the interruptions life had thrown his way.
"Hmm… not bad," Yasushi commented, taking in the tranquil scene. "It's serene, but I have to admit, the few food stands near the entrance seemed to detract a bit from the natural beauty."
He chuckled softly to himself, the sound blending with the gentle roar of the water cascading down. They both stood gazing at the vast waterfall, its powerful descent creating a sprawling pool below. The pool then fed into a narrow river that meandered out of sight.
Yasushi took a step closer, resting his hands on the cold metallic railing. He allowed the cool breeze and the soothing noise of the waterfall's splash to envelop him. The rhythmic sound of the water provided a calming backdrop to his thoughts.
He marveled at how much he was relishing this moment. He was unsure where this newfound appreciation for such tranquil settings had come from, but he found himself enjoying it immensely. Perhaps he was discovering a new hobby, one centered around seeking out peaceful places and immersing himself in the sounds of nature. It was a simple pleasure, but it was one he found increasingly gratifying.
"Are you okay?" Jingliu asked, her voice tinged with concern as she gently touched his arm. Her face bore an expression of worry.
"I'm fine," he answered, keeping his eyes closed as he spoke. "I'm just savoring the small pleasures in life."
This was a new experience for him, something he had rarely done before, especially not in his previous life before reincarnation. Back then, he had spent most of his days alone, often causing harm to others to achieve his goals. His life had been marked by solitude, with no friends or family to turn to.
He finally opened his eyes and shifted his gaze to Jingliu, who looked back at him with a puzzled expression. He reached out and took her hands in his, intertwining their fingers. Her cheeks flushed slightly at the intimate gesture.
"Y-Yasushi…?" she stammered, her face growing red with embarrassment.
"It's alright," he said softly, bringing their faces closer and gently pressing their foreheads together. "I want to share this calm moment with you, especially since we're alone here right now."
Jingliu's cheeks flushed a deeper shade of red as she found herself momentarily speechless by his unexpected romantic gesture. She struggled to find the right words, but none came to mind, leaving her simply standing there, gazing at him with a mix of surprise and shyness.
He let out a soft chuckle at her reaction and, sensing her embarrassment, wrapped her in a warm embrace. Jingliu welcomed the hug, finding comfort in it as she tried to hide her flustered state. After a brief moment of shared silence, she looked up at him, a hint of playfulness in her eyes. "Aren't you going to give me one?" she asked, her voice tinged with curiosity.
Yasushi chuckled again, his eyes twinkling with amusement as he offered a lighthearted apology. "Sorry, I'm still caught up in the moment," he said, leaning in to place a gentle kiss on her lips.
Jingliu's face remained a vibrant red, but she returned the kiss with equal tenderness. After a few seconds, they pulled apart and noticed a young family approaching. One of the children, eyes wide with curiosity, pointed at them, their mouth forming an "O" of surprise.
"It's—" the child began to exclaim, but their parents quickly intervened, gently guiding them away to avoid any further embarrassment for the young couple.
"…we should probably save these kinds of moments for more private settings," Jingliu murmured, her voice carrying a hint of embarrassment. "I'd rather not be seen engaging in intimate activities by others."
"I don't mind," Yasushi responded casually. "I never had strong feelings about these things." He spoke from his experience of never being in a long-term or serious relationship in his previous life. Those relationships had been fleeting, often just brief encounters where people used him for their own reasons. Because of that, he had grown accustomed to keeping his genuine emotions and thoughts to himself.
"Then…" Jingliu said as she pulled out her phone. "Let's take a picture together." She reached for his arm, drawing him closer to her, and guided him to a favorable spot in front of the waterfall. With a few quick adjustments, she began taking several selfies of the two of them.
Yasushi wasn't usually inclined to participate in such activities, finding little purpose in capturing moments this way. Yet, he allowed Jingliu to take the lead. Reflecting on it, he realized he had rarely taken photos even in his new life, a habit that likely stemmed from his previous experiences.
After several minutes of snapping selfies, Jingliu finally turned her phone towards Yasushi, displaying the collection of images she had taken. Yasushi glanced at them with a neutral expression, his indifference clear.
Jingliu herself wasn't typically inclined to engage in such activities, but she found herself willing to participate, especially when it involved Yasushi. For better or worse, he had been a significant influence on her, along with her new circle of friends, transforming her in ways she hadn't anticipated.
As the minutes ticked by, the young couple decided it was time to leave, feeling they had spent enough time at the waterfall. As they made their way out, they noticed a group of boys who were occasionally seen around Yan Jia approaching them. The instant the boys spotted them, their expressions turned ashen, and without a word, they swiftly turned and fled.
"I don't think we're that intimidating," Yasushi commented with a smirk playing on his lips.
"Maybe we've become the villains after what you did with Yan Jia," Jingliu mused. "But to be honest, I've had similar reactions from people even before all that happened. It's not entirely unusual." They chose to brush off the odd encounter, preferring to focus on enjoying their time together without being concerned about the strange judgments of near-strangers.
+-+
"Yasushi, can we talk for a moment?" Yunxue asked, her voice firm as she appeared suddenly in front of him.
Yasushi had just exited the dining room, having finished a glass of milk after a bath. He raised an eyebrow in surprise but nodded in agreement, following her to a quieter room with a balcony. The transition from the bustling dining area to the quiet space was marked by a brief silence as they settled into the new setting.
Yunxue turned to face him directly, her expression serious. "Choose me," she said abruptly. "I'm not sure if you're planning to choose Anfeng or someone else, but I want to experience more out of life and not remain confined to China. Only those who are deemed most suitable will have the chance to accompany Lord Liang Yang or Lady Yuhan Yang."
Her unexpected request left Yasushi taken aback. "Could you explain further? Only if you're comfortable sharing more details, of course."
Yunxue hesitated, her mind racing as she sought a way to provide a clear and appropriate reason. After a moment of reflection, she prepared to explain her motives and the depth of her desires.
"As I mentioned earlier, only those considered the most suitable will have the opportunity to accompany Master Liang Yang and Lady Yuhan Yang on their business trips outside the country," Yunxue began, her tone earnest. "At present, they are accompanied by a few trusted maids and butlers, while the rest of us remain here to manage their residence. Yinhaie has already traveled with Lady Jingliu to Japan, and now, you have the option to select a maid to join you on your journey as well."
Yunxue paused, gathering her thoughts before continuing. "I haven't had many chances to experience life beyond our current setting, as I am still relatively young, around your age. This opportunity to go abroad is a rare chance for me to learn and grow. Anfeng has traveled internationally numerous times, having accompanied both masters on various occasions, but I have not had such opportunities. I am eager to visit Japan and immerse myself in its culture and way of life," she said, fixing her gaze on Yasushi with a determined look.
Yasushi crossed his arms and closed his eyes, letting out a slow breath through his nose as he considered her request. Although he had already made up his mind about who he intended to select, Yunxue's passionate plea presented a compelling argument.
After a moment of contemplation, he opened his eyes and met Yunxue's gaze, noting the nervous anticipation in her expression. "Honestly, I was already planning to choose you, so your request wasn't strictly necessary," he said with a chuckle. "But I appreciate your enthusiasm and the reason behind it."
"Really!?" Yunxue's voice brimmed with excitement, her eyes gleaming under the moon's soft light.
"Yes," Yasushi confirmed with a nod. "Anfeng would have been a solid choice, but Yinhaie made a convincing point. If I were to choose her, it would mean finding a replacement for the Head Maid position, which would just add unnecessary pressure on everyone. Besides, Anfeng's personality can be a bit overwhelming for me. I do like her, don't get me wrong, but I can't help but think that having her around all the time might be more exhausting than I'd like."
Yunxue's face lit up with joy, and she quickly announced, "Then I'll go get ready and pack!" Before Yasushi could respond, she threw her arms around him in an enthusiastic hug and dashed out of the room, leaving him alone with a bemused chuckle.
"So, was that satisfactory for you?" Yasushi asked, glancing toward a dimly lit corner of the room. Anfeng emerged from the shadows, looking slightly taken aback.
"You saw me?" she said, her surprise evident in her voice.
"It would have been more unusual if I hadn't noticed. You weren't exactly subtle in concealing your presence," Yasushi said as he turned to face Anfeng. "Anyway, I'm heading out now. If you have any questions, feel free to ask."
"This must be the skill of Japanese ninjas," Anfeng murmured with a hint of awe, causing Yasushi to chuckle softly. "Were you worried about me carrying out the things I mentioned? Yunxue can be quite naïve about certain matters, so if you want those things to happen, you'll need to—"
"No," Yasushi interrupted, "I'm with Jingliu. I don't need any extra services from a maid, and I've already told you before that I'm not interested, so please stop bringing it up."
He started to walk away, Yinhaie following closely behind. As he continued, he added, "Not everyone is constantly thinking about those kinds of things, you know?"
Anfeng laughed at his comment, and they left the room together, chatting casually before going their separate ways for the evening.