Now, returning to the current situation. It has been like this for at least ten minutes. The staring contest is still not over, and I am about to snap at any moment. That tension is too much, I want to run away already… At least say something, damn it! I can't stand awkward silences like this! After a few minutes – very long minutes - as if reacting to my silent wish, my uncle finally broke the silence.
"Ivy," he spoke with a hoarse voice, without breaking the eye-contact.
Hearing her name called out, Ivy flinched in both surprise and fear. "YES, MY LORD!" She shouted.
"Why don't you bring our guests some tea?" He ordered.
"Right away!"
Excusing herself, she deeply bowed down in front of us before stepping out of the room hastily. Once she left, the silence immediately returned. If it wasn't for my aunt's comical expressions, I definitely wouldn't have been able to withstand it. Fortunately, it didn't take long before Ivy came back with an elegant porcelain tea set. She nicely arranged it on the table and started pouring the tea. I was worried that her nervousness would make her hands shake and cause her to do a big mistake, but she seems to have regained her professionalism. Once she was done, she silently regained her place, behind me.
"Please, help yourself," Uncle Jack said.
Completely oblivious to the atmosphere, Yoko happily took her cup and drank the tea in one gulp. "Tastes like crap. Is this made of vegetable or something?" She bluntly said, putting her cup back on the table.
Oh come on, Yoko. Can't you read the mood? I should have told her about the etiquettes!
Giving a quick glance in front of me, I tried to study the other party's expression. As always, Uncle Jack kept his poker face, seemingly unbothered by Yoko's rude behavior. I am pretty sure it is just on the outside though, since I know he can't stand anything or anyone who doesn't conform to the basic rules of courtesy.
On the other hand, each time Yoko did or said something, Aunt Nora's facial muscles kept twitching in sync, which was quite comical. I know she is not fond of me, so it is a given that she would not like any of my guests, especially not a demi-human. Moreover, Yoko's rude behavior is definitely not helping. Had I not been here, I am pretty sure Aunt Nora would have slapped her already.
"Yoko, my love?" Harri called out, with his usual handsome-guy face. "Mind your manners, will you? We're not home, right now."
For a split of a second, I was pretty sure that she was going to insult him, like she always does whenever he opens his mouth. However, she probably recalled my rules as a wry smile appeared on her face. "Sure, honey~! My bad, my bad."
"I am very sorry to hear it doesn't suit your taste," Uncle Jack said with a cold voice, clearly not thinking it. "So, who may you be?"
Here we are. With this one question, a sudden shiver ran down my spine as I felt an unsettling anxiety tingling through me like electrical sparks. One mistake. One mistake and it's over. Everything is exposed. Turning to Yoko, without uttering a word, I gave her a meaningful look, hoping she wouldn't say something unnecessary or screw up. Seeing my expression, she replied with a candid smile, as if saying 'Don't worry, I got it'.
"Friends!" She exclaimed, responding to my uncle's question. "Nothing less, nothing more! We just randomly met at the market place. We helped Lynett with a thief, and she thought of inviting us to thank us!"
Isn't this exactly the same thing I said? God damn it, Yoko. I mean, I know she doesn't like to tell lies and I am grateful that she stuck to the plan, but… Seriously, do your bit.
"My name is Harri, and this lovely, breathtaking woman is my wife, Yoko." Harri said, emphasizing on the compliments, clearly overdoing it. "As she just stated, we are friends with the Cr-… with Lynett."
"Friends, huh?" My uncle repeated, obviously not convinced.
"Right, friends! Nothing less, nothing more! We just randomly met at-"
"Yoko," I interrupted her. "I think they understood."
She is such a bad liar… I actually chose this story because it wasn't too far from the reality. So even though it doesn't tell everything, it's not completely a lie either. Yet, look at her. She really can't lie, can she? Thank god I didn't make up another story. The lie would have been exposed immediately.
"So, you must be Lynett's family!" Yoko said, trying to change the topic. "Are you the humans who gave birth to her?"
"She is our niece," Uncle Jack quickly corrected. "I am the Marquis of Eskor, Jack Whiteheart and this is my sister Nora."
"Is that so? What a relief!" Yoko exclaimed before turning to me. "Thinking about it, you did say that your mother was an elf, right? Good thing it's not her! I mean, I would have really pitied you if such a boobless woman was your mother, haha!"
Yoko, I am so going to make you pay for this. Read the GODDAMN mood! The worst thing about this situation is that she is such an airhead she didn't even notice she was being rude.
I gave a quick glance to Aunt Nora. As I thought, she was about to snap. Her whole body was trembling in anger as she was biting her lips and clenching her fists. She was holding it in, but not for much longer. There was just no way that she would let a (seemingly) demi-human insult her like this, right in front of her face.
"But, what's wrong with her? She keeps shivering. Is she sick?" Yoko asked, completely oblivious. "No charms at all! Don't you agree honey~?"
"Uhm… I think the real problem is this 'uncle' over there." Harri responded.
Oh gods. Not him too. Please, Harri, don't make it worse.
"Look at him, as stiff as a statue. And what's with his cold stare? A real man should give off refreshing vibes and display an appealing smile in all circumstances! He is nothing like a gentleman at all!"
... They can hear everything you say, you know? Why are you guys talking like if they weren't here? Those stupid Gods… No common sense at all. I knew they were straightforward, but can't they have a little restraint? The only rule I should have made is to keep their mouth shut all the time! Ah, whatever. I don't care anymore...
"I WILL NOT TOLERATE THIS ANYMORE!" A feminine voice suddenly shouted, as a flat palm slammed against the table.
Well, it was about time. As I thought, Aunt Nora finally snapped.
"What's wrong with you two? Are you out of your mind?!" She continued. "Do you have any ideas of where you are, right now, and who you are talking to?!"
"Oh my, I think she's upset." Yoko said, with a slight tone of naivety in her voice.
"OF COURSE I AM! Am I supposed to let myself be insulted by a lowly slave?!"
This time, it was Yoko's turn to snap.
"Lowly sl-?! Hey, boobless girl. Don't say something that you will regret." She grunted with an arrogant smile. "I am superior to you in any aspect. Power, rank, race, face and boobs."
"Yoko, my love, you know that there is no point in arguing with an excited woman." Harri said, trying to calm the situation, completely unaware that he was only making things worse.
"Shut up!" Aunt Nora yelled, turning her gaze to Harri. "I don't want to hear that from you, a fool who actually dared to marry to an inferior race! You are the worst of all, trying to mix our blood with those filthy beasts!"
Harri widened his eyes and blinked a few times, confused. Then, he brought his hand to his face, letting out a loud sigh. "Such vulgarity… Not lady-like at all."
Yoko suddenly burst out in laughter. "HAHAHAHAHA! See that Harri? Isn't she even worse than me? Such bad character! HAHAHA! She must really not be popular among men!"
Touché. Unable to withstand the affront any longer, Aunt Nora suddenly stood and raised her hand, ready to slap Yoko. However, before she had the time to give her the smack, Yoko also stood up, grabbed her hand and pulled her over, making her lose her balance. Preventing Aunt Nora from falling, Yoko placed her second arm around her waist and… Huh?
…
WHAT IN THE WORLD IS SHE DOING?! She's kissing her!!
The heck?! What is she thinking? Am I dreaming? Quickly examining the others, I noticed that everyone just froze in place, watching the scene in astonishment. Definitely not a dream. But… Wow! That's my first time seeing two girls kissing. I slowly turned to Harri, the only one who didn't seem bothered by Yoko's sudden action as he took a sip of his tea nonchalantly.
"Aren't you going to stop her?" I whispered to him.
"Uhm? Why would I? Leave her be, she's just discussing." He simply answered, unconcerned.
"You call that discussing?!"
"Yes. Kissing is the language of love. Besides, it's Yoko we're talking about."
What's with that mentality? He is insane! All my Gods are insane!
"Still," I insisted in a low voice, making sure we wouldn't be heard. "As the God of Love, shouldn't you be bothered by it? I mean… since they're both female."
"Quite the opposite, actually." Harri shrugged. "I support all kinds of love. Be it with a man, a woman, or a beast. As long as there is love, it's completely fine."
Oh, that's quite poetic! As expected of the God of Love! But I don't think there is any love in this, so he should… Wait, what?! A beast? Bestiality is ok too?!
Guessing what I was thinking, as he saw my expression, a wry smile played on Harri's lips. "How do you think the beastkin were created to begin with?" He asked.
HUH?! So that's how the beastkin were created? Wait, no! It's not like that! Beastmen exist because I created them! Suddenly understanding that Harri was just teasing me, I sent a deadly stare at him.
"Haha, just kidding," he simply said, avoiding my gaze.
I could have thought of a way to punish him, but my attention returned to Yoko and Aunt Nora, as their kiss – very long kiss - finally ended. Aunt Nora immediately collapsed on the sofa, gasping, as Yoko stole all the air from her lungs. Her face completely flushed, she grabbed her chest as her body was starving for oxygen. That sure was intense. Auntie, you need to breathe through your nose.
"Chill, girl," Yoko said, as her lips curled into a grin. "You shouldn't get angry like that. It will only ruin your make-up. Have some pride and don't waste your pretty face any more than this."
Hearing this, everyone was drawn from the confused state that they had fallen into, as they tried to comprehend what just happened. Her breathing finally returning to normal, Aunt Nora turned her gaze on Yoko, her eyes full of anger and indignation. Obviously, stealing a kiss from her didn't help in calming her down. Quite the opposite actually. But before she could say anything, I spoke up. I didn't need the situation to escalate more than it already did.
"Excuse her. They're foreigners; they don't have the same customs as us. For her, kissing is just a way to… make up. She didn't mean to be rude."
"ARE YOU KIDDING M- " Aunt Nora started to yell out at me, but then, she suddenly recalled who she was talking to, as she lowered her tone, averting her gaze. "Even though... Even as foreigners, there are limits! And in what kind of country do people kiss each other like this?!"
"Uhm? What, would you have preferred to go all the way?" Yoko asked naturally, raising a single eyebrow.
God damn it, Yoko… Once again, read the mood. Meanwhile, my aunt just widened her eyes and furrowed her forehead, clearly not believing what she just heard. Her jaw was shaking as she was trying to say something.
"You…! Do you want to di-"
"Nora." The cold voice of Uncle Jack suddenly interrupted her.
Without saying anything else, he simply gave her a meaningful look. Aunt Nora looked at him for a few seconds before letting out a heavy sigh. She clicked her tongue as she crossed her arms in front of her. While she did not push the matter any further, her deadly stares at Yoko clearly indicated that she still has not given up.
"My apologies, my sister has some temper issues," Uncle Jack said. "Please do not mind her. I am grateful for your assistance to my niece. Make yourself at home and feel free to stay as much as you want."
Finishing his host's speech, Uncle Jack stood up, as Aunt Nora imitated him, still annoyed.
"Now then, I guess we should leave some time to our dear Lynett and her friends."
Without even waiting for an answer, Uncle Jack headed to the door, and everyone else followed him silently. As he was about to step out of the room, he turned one last time at us.
"Please, take your time." He added just before disappearing, as a gentle smile appeared on his face.
…
Did I just see my uncle smile…?