"What's up?"
"Personal stuff, quite private and intimate."
Men and Women do tend to get into very intimate discussions—as intimate as it gets, really. You should always believe a man's lechery, and never too readily trust a woman's purity, people are all the same.
If they aren't the same, please see a doctor.
"What kind of problem?" Gu Ran couldn't help but be intrigued; he liked beautiful women.
This was one strong piece of evidence that he was normal.
Su Qing smiled slightly, looking absolutely charming.
She asked quietly, "Do you have hair on your butt?"
"..."
Gu Ran looked up, glancing left and right.
"What do you mean? Are you looking at me with a 'you're not the real super beauty Su Qing, you're a mental patient from the clinic who stole the keys and is pretending to be Su Qing to pick people up' expression?"
Gu Ran nodded twice in agreement, "That was exactly my thought."
"Isn't it normal to have hair on your butt? You don't even know this bit of physiological knowledge, do you?"
"But asking about whether someone else's butt has hair is not normal," Gu Ran stated with certainty.
Su Qing glanced at him discontentedly, "I'm talking about dog hair on your butt, you horndog."
Gu Ran hurriedly looked behind him, noticing several white hairs stuck to his clothes, stubborn and unshakable even when he tried to brush them off.
"Be thankful to me," Su Qing said with a comfortable smile, "I warned you early. Otherwise, by the time you got to the canteen, you'd blend in perfectly with 'Jinghai Psychological Sanatorium.'"
This place is a psychological clinic, only called a 'sanatorium' to sound nicer. Everyone here is either a doctor or a patient with mental issues, so which side would someone with dog hair on their butt fit in with?
Gu Ran didn't speak, just methodically cleaned the dog hair off himself.
"Hey." Su Qing stretched out a pale finger, playfully poking his shoulder, "Say thank you."
"Thank you."
"Thank you, Qing," Su Qing enunciated, teaching him.
"...You really are shameless!" Gu Ran exclaimed in awe.
Su Qing laughed, "Admitting defeat?"
Gu Ran snapped back to reality, "Is this your declaration of war?"
Su Qing nodded, confident of her victory.
"Are you seriously trying to win, or just joking?" Gu Ran asked.
"Of course, I am seriously trying to win. Who cares about winning or losing in a joke?"
Gu Ran also laughed, radiating charm, his tall and lean figure bathed in the sunlight, bursting with vitality.
"I'll concede if it's a joke, but if you're serious... I will never surrender!" he declared.
"Then let's continue," Su Qing said, "Come on, let's eat."
Gu Ran followed her with his suitcase, checking for any remaining dog hair while walking.
His eyes, while scanning his clothes, couldn't help but sneak glances at Su Qing's figure; her black hair draped down, her jeans accentuating her full and round buttocks, her legs long and straight.
When she walked, her legs crossed tightly with no space between, extremely compact.
As soon as they entered, Gu Ran let out a satisfied sigh—the canteen's air conditioning was strong.
There were two ways of getting food.
First, you get a tray and walk along the line, asking for a small bowl of whatever you fancy from the server, then ending with free soup and fruit.
Second, order individually, which was cooked separately and cost more.
There was plenty of seafood, with the freshness of the Spanish mackerel clearly surpassing that of inland supermarkets, Gu Ran ordered Spanish mackerel with sauerkraut, squid, and a seasonal vegetable.
The soup and free fruit were a must.
Su Qing also ordered a portion.
The two found a casual spot to sit down.
Gu Ran said, "Didn't you eat at McDonald's?"
Just as Su Qing picked up her chopsticks, she stopped and stared at him.
Gu Ran slurped his soup contentedly and started eating, gesturing Su Qing to answer while doing so.
"You were staring hard at my butt just now, weren't you?" Su Qing blurted out unexpectedly.
"Pfft—!" Gu Ran struggled to hold it in, his entire face turning red.
Su Qing put down her chopsticks, her fingers interlocked as she propped up her chin, staring at Gu Ran, enjoying his effort to not spit out his food.
Then, just as Gu Ran was about to hold it in, the wicked witch laughed again, "Were you wondering whether my butt had hair or not?"
"Pfft!" Gu Ran hurriedly covered his mouth.
Su Qing leaned back, arms folded across her chest, looking down at him disdainfully for both the lascivious act of staring at her butt and the disgusting act of spitting out his food.
Gu Ran was going crazy.
He had never met someone quite like this woman before... with all this talk about butt hair...
Once his condition stabilized, he saw a grain of rice in the palm of the hand that covered his mouth; he had done his best.
Su Qing passed him a tissue and carried on eating nonchalantly, then said:
"The human psyche is strange, isn't it? The grain of rice in your palm was in your mouth just moments ago, but now you can't bring yourself to eat it simply because it came out of your mouth.
"If it had just fallen accidentally, you wouldn't care as much, but what's the real difference between the two?"
"Because 'spitting' is inelegant and makes one think of vomiting, while 'dropping' is associated with thrift, a virtue," Gu Ran said, wiping his hands clean and scrutinizing the woman before him.
The more he looked, the more extraordinary she seemed.
Almost translucent beauty, those fingers holding chopsticks so delicate and fair, her small, soft lips eating, just sitting in the canteen, she made the canteen seem like heaven, illuminating the whole room.
Beautiful as an angel!
"Joseph Conrad wrote in 'Heart of Darkness,' 'The truest fear is what men hold for their own imagination,' fits right in here, doesn't it?"
"Probably," Gu Ran mused.
"Why aren't you eating?"
"I'm thinking what could make you spit your food again," Gu Ran replied, his tone indifferent.
Su Qing covered her mouth and laughed.
But if spitting out food was a 10, she was only at a 3 right now.