"Damn you, Hera!" Hercules shouted aloud in the bustling café at the mall.
Once again, the goddess of marriage had failed to answer his prayers some girls.
"Hercules, you do realise that's probably why you haven't had a girlfriend?" came a voice from across the table.
He turned to his best friend, Adonis. Tall and handsome, Adonis had long brown hair tied back in a ponytail. His lean yet strong physique was a magnet for attention. When the ladies finally looked at his face, most of them fell for him hook, line, and sinker.
To date, Adonis had never encountered a girl who didn't want him. This was mostly because he kept rejecting those who came his way, holding out for the "Perfect Woman." In stark contrast, Hercules had never had a girlfriend who wanted him back, always facing rejection.
"I want to know how you do it, Adonis. One look at you and all the girls fall in love," Hercules said, his voice tinged with envy.
Adonis smiled, a warm, beautiful smile. "Plastic surgery is always an option, isn't it?" he teased.
The comment felt like an arrow to Hercules' chest. For the millionth time, he wished Adonis' good looks would backfire, but that had never happened.
As Hercules tried to recover from his third rejection of the day, he opened the Uber app to check for good taxi prices. Inflation in Greece had made even simple things expensive. He quickly booked a ride using Adonis' card, and they headed outside to wait.
The heat outside was intense, even in winter. Hercules looked at Adonis, the sun's rays casting harsh shadows. "Look at that, Adonis. Even in the middle of winter, the sun finds ways to make life more miserable. It's almost as if it's personally coming to torment us."
He pointed at the sky, where a blazing chariot was descending. Hercules' eyes widened as he realized something was amiss.
Taking a step back, he muttered, "Uh... Let's go. I don't think that's the Uber we ordered."
Adonis remained silent, his eyes glazed over as if in a trance. Hercules grabbed his arm, trying to pull him away, only to realize his own feet had sunk firmly into the melting ground. The normally bustling mall was eerily empty.
BOOM!
The chariot landed with a thunderous noise, yet miraculously, the ground beneath it did not scorch. The door swung open, revealing a strikingly handsome figure in the driver's seat.
"You called for an Uber, Adonis?" the man asked with a knowing smile.
Before Hercules could process the situation, the man snapped his fingers. Instantly, the ground solidified and the heat dissipated.
"That should make it easier for you to get in. No need to thank me, my son. Now get in so we can catch up while I take you home."
Hercules was momentarily starstruck. Adonis seemed to regain his senses and looked at the man with wary eyes. "Who are you, and how did you do all those things? Am I hallucinating?"
The man laughed heartily. "Who am I, you ask? Get in, and I'll tell you everything about my divinity. By the way, sorry for not being around during most of your childhood. Trying to get those annoying cattle to give up their milk is no easy task, I tell you."
Adonis began walking toward the chariot. Hercules' eyes widened as he realized his friend was likely being controlled. Panicking, he tried to hold onto Adonis, but it was futile. Adonis quickly reached the chariot, opened the door, and got in, leaving Hercules outside.
He knocked frantically on the window as the man inside burst into laughter. "Alright, my son. Let's go home."
"Hey, wait!" Hercules shouted, his voice rising with urgency. "Don't just take my friend like that, you motherless son of a mother!"
As he continued shouting profanities, the man muttered something about flying being difficult with passengers. "Hey, are you talking about me?" Hercules asked.
It seemed the man didn't hear him. The chariot began to levitate, and Hercules did whatever he could to hold on. He managed to grab the step at its side just in time as the chariot started moving faster and faster.
Space itself seemed to warp and form a tunnel in front of the chariot. It was on this day that Hercules developed his fear of flying.
Hercules hung on for dear life as the chariot sped through the sky. "Wait!" he screamed. "Slow down!"
The being turned toward him, his eyes now cold and devoid of the warmth he had shown Adonis. "Hmm, a pest got on? I guess I forgot to put on pest control."
With those words, the chariot burst into flames, blazing fiercely as it continued its rapid ascent, with Hercules clinging desperately to its side.