Hello friends, this is just an auxiliary chapter I decided to write so as to express the bottled up emotions I've accumulated for a while now.
Regret.....
What is regret?
I'm sure many of you might have thought numerous times that if you had the power to change things, then you'll definitely go back and try to correct your past doings.
Well i for one I'm just an ordinary person like you all, i breathe thesame air, wear thesame cheap clothes and eat the same facking variety of food y'all do.
Today I thoroughly experienced what regret was....and still I can't define how I feel.
I don't know if I should feel sad or if I should feel angry.
You see I'm just a student, and I took an important exams which would decide how my future as an adult shall be.
Actually I would have written those exams about 3 years ago, because I faced up and messed around, it stalled me to where I am.
Truth is I'm not that hurt about failing the exams....I even find it Abit funny you know
But because I aren't hurt doesn't mean others counting on me weren't
The trusted me, provided everything I needed, believed in me, and wished me the best.
But at the end, I couldn't even do one simple shit.
It's so infuriating that I feel as to smack the hell out of the past me.
It's all his fault.
It's all my fault..
It's all our fault...
Since little I had this mentality of leaving my future problems to my future self....and it's cause of that the present me is suffering now.
I really hate the past me, he's surely enjoying himself now thinking only the present me would suffer the repercussions of his choices
I really regret everything
I regret it
I regret it
I regret it.
And worst of all, if given a chance I'm absolutely sure i won't want to change anything.
Y'all know why?
Cause it's my lat mistakes that made me to become the person I am today.
Yes I do feel regret, and so what.
I won't go around ranting that everyone makes errors
I'm my own self, my mistakes are to be borne by me.
It's what made me to who I am presently
And I'll never want to change that for anything else.
Even if I'm given a chance to be Almighty.
I sometimes make mistakes
I sometimes ignore my errors
And to all those who I hurt, I'm absolutely sorry to tell you that
I DON'T GIVE A FACK.
Yes that's right
I don't care anymore
I'm not living for any of you
I'm living because I decided to
So what if God gave me life, I didn't ask him for any of this, my choice defines who I am and I've decided to continue as I am
I won't care about consequences anymore
I won't live my life just to impress anyone
I will always be me no matter what
And mostly.....i apologize to the future me for destroying his life.
I'm conscious that my life isn't only mine, it belongs to the past, present, and future
So future me, for the first time since my eyes had opened to this reality
I apologize too you
And may you live to accomplish what I can't
(°^°)'''\